View Full Version : SECRETS REVEALED: The truth Behind Terry Wallace snubbing Hawthorn in favour of Rich
The Dice Man
20 Jul 2005, 05:35
TOP SECRET
The following telephone conversation took place on July 24, 2004 at 10:47AM between Dermott Brereton (DERM), Jason Dunstall (PIG) and Terry Wallace(TW). This convo was recorded by stealth by members of the ASIOCon security network, in the interests of improving football intelligence.
10:47am
PIG: Hey Tezza, it's Piggy here mate, how ya doin?
TW: Im quite well thank you Jason, how are you?
PIG: Maaate Im great, Ive just put down 4 steak & Kidney pies for breaky and Derm here is just fixing his hair for this call and he'll be here in a second.
(TW is heard muttering under his breath, while PIG sounds like he's licking somthing. Moments later Dermott is heard approaching the phone muttering something about the color in his hair fading.
DERM: Do you think my color is fading Jase?
PIG: Now is not the time Dermott. We have Terry on the line here to dicuss the coaching gig at the Hawks next year.
DERM: Terry? You mean Terry Wallace? Wooow, I didnt think he'd be interested in us.
TW Good mornining Dermott. I'm speaking to all clubs with vacant coaching positions, in order to get a feel as to where the clubs see themselves now, in the future, and what they want in a coach. What does Hawthorn want Dermott?
Derm: We want you Tezza
TW: That's flattering Dermott, but why do you want me?
DERM: Uhm.. well,...oh ..OH .. oh well we played in all those premierships together.
TW: You mean that's all you require, that is a coach who you played with?
PIG: Of course Terry, how do you think we got these jobs?
TW: Uhm, err, OK. Moving on, where do you see the Hawks next year?
DERM: Well we expected to win the premiership this year. If you remember Schwabbies comments.. oh see, another ex-hawk champ there, anyway remember Schwabb's comment that we will win the premiership this year?
TW: Yes
DERM: That was me! All mine that one. I told him to say it to boost the confidence in the boys.
TW: But that didn't really work out Dermott.
DERM: Nah, nah it didn't. It's all Schwabbies fault. He didn't say it right. What I've learnt in my time in the media is, is that you have to know when to hold em or fold em. In this case, Schwabby should've folded.
PIG: But he's an ex-Hawk. So he's still good value.
DERM: Yeah he is. I just wished we didnt have to sack him that night when he came back without cheese on our whoppers. You remember that Jase?
PIG: Nightmare Derm, absolute nightmare that night. He had it coming.
TW: Uhm, guys. Can we please get back to the coaching job. Now I'd like to know where you see the Hawks next year.
DERM: Well Terry, we see us at number 1 next year.
PIG: Yeah and number 2 too.
DERM: We want them both Terry.
TW: That's impossible! You cant finish first AND second!
DERM: He doesn't understand Jase.
PIG: Maybe he's not Hathorn material afterall?
DERM: Maybe.
TW: What the hell are you guys on about?
DERM: We want the number 1 and number 2 national draft picks in 2005 Terry, and we will do anything to get them. Even play a completley inexperienced side who are not ready for senior AFL football so it doesnt make you look like a bad coach, just someone without the cattle.
PIG: Yeah and too make it even easier, we're gonna make Vandenburg Captain!
TW: (under breath) Oh no.
DERM: We're gonna do what St.Kilda has gawn and done. We are gonna tank for 3 years trying to get the best 6 draft picks in that year. Now what we want you to do is just look after these guys, and hopefully by around 2007/8, Cornflakes is available and we can grab him.
PIG: Yep so we're going for a youth policy Tezza, we're gonna kick out the players like Graham, and we're not even gonna consider to play Holland.. We're simply paying him too much.
DERM: Yeah so to teach him we're gonna play him in teh VFL all year.
TW: I think Mark Graham still has a year left in him.
PIG: He's probably got 2 years you know, but we just can afford to have too much experience out there..just in case they win.
TW: What about the media? They'll be onto you.
DERM: Nah, we have that all sussed Tezza. We're actually building a second training centre and coaching quarters out at Waverley. Then we're actually going to train at both venues..
TW: Oh God
DERM: ...train at both venues, and not tell the media where we will be.
PIG: We're also getting a hold of that Batcar that Angry drove at Waverley that day. That will be the coaches car, and were gonna tint the windows so no-one will know who you are.
TW: Uhm, yer.. OK. Now what about Salary, what are you looking at paying your coach?
DERM: We've organised that guy with the sack full of peanuts to come around to your office everyday.
PIG: Oh OH OH... And on friday's we have donuts too.
DERM: They're our shout too.
...click.
PIG: So, whattya say Tezza?
DERM: We're mates aren't we?
PIG: Terry?
DERM: Maybe he's fixing his hair.
PIG: Terry? Hello Terry?
...10:55am end of call
The Magenius
20 Jul 2005, 05:48
http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y237/magenius/15a-Wind-tumbleweed.jpg...
The Dice Man
20 Jul 2005, 05:55
Sorry about that Magenius, I'll try to keep it under 30 words next time, just for you.
bloodsports
20 Jul 2005, 05:55
This crap is directly linked to the crap produced on the footy show.
Why do football idiots all suddenly over- rate their own dramatic writing skills so much ?
I defy anyone but the author to read this ********e for more than 3 lines without falling asleep or vomiting or both.
Not one original idea here, just rehashed crapolla used to draw much desired attention to ones self.
I liked it better when footy fans mostly accepted that they were dumb.
Bordom board. ;)
Magpiespower
20 Jul 2005, 06:00
Couldn't be bothered reading that but a famous film producer once said that a scene should never be more than three pages long.
The Dice Man
20 Jul 2005, 06:02
This crap is directly linked to the crap produced on the footy show.
Why do football idiots all suddenly over- rate their own dramatic writing skills so much ?
I defy anyone but the author to read this ********e for more than 3 lines without falling asleep or vomiting or both.
Not one original idea here, just rehashed crapolla used to draw much desired attention to ones self.
I liked it better when footy fans mostly accepted that they were dumb.
Bordom board. ;)
Where is this bordom board you speak of?
Where is this bordom board you speak of?
Not sure, but go looking and don't come back till you find it. ;)
rick James
20 Jul 2005, 08:33
I thought it was ok... keep trying youngster.. you'll get there. but just remember as you reach for the sky, to keep your feet on the ground!
GO TEAM!
Higgs Boson
20 Jul 2005, 08:44
And you need to be humble about it. If you want to kiss the sky you gotta learn how to kneel.
You're rather good at revealing secrets, aren't you. Did someone leave a door unlocked?
The Dice Man
20 Jul 2005, 08:53
You're rather good at revealing secrets, aren't you. Did someone leave a door unlocked?
No it was quite clearly a phone conversation and had nothing to do with locked doors at all.
mocaholic
20 Jul 2005, 09:08
Very timely and relevant too (July '04??). Well done. You should speak with Hecks, except he does his best work in one para.
And how does this assist in 'improving football intelligence'?
Resubmit, dice man. You can do better.
LongBomb
20 Jul 2005, 09:15
Can someone summarise?
I got bored after the second line.
Can someone summarise?
I got bored after the second line.
Dunstall is fat, Dermott is stupid and Terry wanted more than a bag of peanuts.
BalmyArmy
20 Jul 2005, 09:34
Good read. Not too far from the actual truth I'd imagine.
*Crash*
20 Jul 2005, 11:30
Tumbleweeds, now that is truly funny. Diceman better roll the dice again man.
moistie
20 Jul 2005, 11:48
Dunstall is fat, Dermott is stupid and Terry wanted more than a bag of peanuts.
Wow! Dice Man must have really stretched to come up with such a detailed plot line.
Schneiderman
20 Jul 2005, 12:51
Very funny Dice Man.
Of course you left off the Richmond conversation:
Terry: Lets just cut to the chase eh? What are you guys offering?
RICH: Double whatever anyone else is offering!!!
Terry: Sold! {click}
hecks99
20 Jul 2005, 13:28
Very timely and relevant too (July '04??). Well done. You should speak with Hecks, except he does his best work in one para.
And how does this assist in 'improving football intelligence'?
Resubmit, dice man. You can do better.
I posted the correct wording of the conversation which was recorded, but it was unfairly taken down just like Adrian Cox who was unfairly delisted.
As for you dice man you are an unfunny ********er who should find something better to do with your time rather than rolling a dice to see what you post of bigfooty then writing a thesis which you then post. Could you add a poll to this it should go as follows:
What word best describes diceman?
********er
Tosser
Tosspot
****************
****************
******** sucker
********ing selean
All of the above
I've just completed a phone survey and the polls show a landslide victory to all of the above.
How long until someone points out Hecks spelt idiot wrong?
Any takers?
The Magenius
20 Jul 2005, 13:56
Sorry about that Magenius, I'll try to keep it under 30 words next time, just for you.
Thanks.
hecks99
20 Jul 2005, 14:06
How long until someone points out Hecks spelt idiot wrong?
Any takers?
how long is it before anyone points out to Richmond supporters that they picked the wrong team?
MeestaNob
20 Jul 2005, 14:31
http://m.1asphost.com/andrewgreer/temppics/scrooge.jpg
2004: Terry Wallace (pictured), post press conference.
HAWKS HEROES
20 Jul 2005, 18:25
Good read. Not too far from the actual truth I'd imagine.
no where near the truth
and you would find quite a few hawk supporters didn't want him either
Very funny Dice Man.
Of course you left off the Richmond conversation:
Terry: Lets just cut to the chase eh? What are you guys offering?
RICH: Double whatever anyone else is offering!!!
Terry: Sold! {click}
2 bags of peanuts? Cool
Funny coming from a Sydney supporter anyway, you guys paid him for 2 years to commentate
The Majestic
20 Jul 2005, 18:59
Dunstall is fat, Dermott is stupid and Terry wanted more than a bag of peanuts.
So he turned down a bag of nuts for a team of nuts? Good deal.
So he turned down a bag of nuts for a team of nuts? Good deal.
Depends on what kind of nuts really. Pistachios (sp) could change that from a good deal to a bad deal.
Depends on what kind of nuts really. Pistachios (sp) could change that from a good deal to a bad deal.
:D :p
I actually found the joke quite humerous
Orangewhip
20 Jul 2005, 19:33
I defy anyone but the author to read this ********e for more than 3 lines without falling asleep or vomiting or both.
Not one original idea here, just rehashed crapolla used to draw much desired attention to ones self.
I liked it better when footy fans mostly accepted that they were dumb.
Bordom board. ;)
Barely read the original post for reasons mentioned above. Scrolled quickly and the words 'asleep' and 'vomiting' were like puffy clouds.
It's a shame that insight on this site often comes from responses to crap.
Heh, I thought it was quite clever and funny.
Mr Wong
20 Jul 2005, 19:40
Of course you left off the Richmond conversation:
Terry: Lets just cut to the chase eh? What are you guys offering?
RICH: Double whatever anyone else is offering!!!
Terry: Sold! {click}
Bingo this is what really happened
Crow-mosone
20 Jul 2005, 20:03
TOP SECRET
The following telephone conversation took place on July 24, 2004 at 10:47AM between Dermott Brereton (DERM), Jason Dunstall (PIG) and Terry Wallace(TW). This convo was recorded by stealth by members of the ASIOCon security network, in the interests of improving football intelligence.
10:47am
PIG: Hey Tezza, it's Piggy here mate, how ya doin?
TW: Im quite well thank you Jason, how are you?
PIG: Maaate Im great, Ive just put down 4 steak & Kidney pies for breaky and Derm here is just fixing his hair for this call and he'll be here in a second.
(TW is heard muttering under his breath, while PIG sounds like he's licking somthing. Moments later Dermott is heard approaching the phone muttering something about the color in his hair fading.
DERM: Do you think my color is fading Jase?
PIG: Now is not the time Dermott. We have Terry on the line here to dicuss the coaching gig at the Hawks next year.
DERM: Terry? You mean Terry Wallace? Wooow, I didnt think he'd be interested in us.
TW Good mornining Dermott. I'm speaking to all clubs with vacant coaching positions, in order to get a feel as to where the clubs see themselves now, in the future, and what they want in a coach. What does Hawthorn want Dermott?
Derm: We want you Tezza
TW: That's flattering Dermott, but why do you want me?
DERM: Uhm.. well,...oh ..OH .. oh well we played in all those premierships together.
TW: You mean that's all you require, that is a coach who you played with?
PIG: Of course Terry, how do you think we got these jobs?
TW: Uhm, err, OK. Moving on, where do you see the Hawks next year?
DERM: Well we expected to win the premiership this year. If you remember Schwabbies comments.. oh see, another ex-hawk champ there, anyway remember Schwabb's comment that we will win the premiership this year?
TW: Yes
DERM: That was me! All mine that one. I told him to say it to boost the confidence in the boys.
TW: But that didn't really work out Dermott.
DERM: Nah, nah it didn't. It's all Schwabbies fault. He didn't say it right. What I've learnt in my time in the media is, is that you have to know when to hold em or fold em. In this case, Schwabby should've folded.
PIG: But he's an ex-Hawk. So he's still good value.
DERM: Yeah he is. I just wished we didnt have to sack him that night when he came back without cheese on our whoppers. You remember that Jase?
PIG: Nightmare Derm, absolute nightmare that night. He had it coming.
TW: Uhm, guys. Can we please get back to the coaching job. Now I'd like to know where you see the Hawks next year.
DERM: Well Terry, we see us at number 1 next year.
PIG: Yeah and number 2 too.
DERM: We want them both Terry.
TW: That's impossible! You cant finish first AND second!
DERM: He doesn't understand Jase.
PIG: Maybe he's not Hathorn material afterall?
DERM: Maybe.
TW: What the hell are you guys on about?
DERM: We want the number 1 and number 2 national draft picks in 2005 Terry, and we will do anything to get them. Even play a completley inexperienced side who are not ready for senior AFL football so it doesnt make you look like a bad coach, just someone without the cattle.
PIG: Yeah and too make it even easier, we're gonna make Vandenburg Captain!
TW: (under breath) Oh no.
DERM: We're gonna do what St.Kilda has gawn and done. We are gonna tank for 3 years trying to get the best 6 draft picks in that year. Now what we want you to do is just look after these guys, and hopefully by around 2007/8, Cornflakes is available and we can grab him.
PIG: Yep so we're going for a youth policy Tezza, we're gonna kick out the players like Graham, and we're not even gonna consider to play Holland.. We're simply paying him too much.
DERM: Yeah so to teach him we're gonna play him in teh VFL all year.
TW: I think Mark Graham still has a year left in him.
PIG: He's probably got 2 years you know, but we just can afford to have too much experience out there..just in case they win.
TW: What about the media? They'll be onto you.
DERM: Nah, we have that all sussed Tezza. We're actually building a second training centre and coaching quarters out at Waverley. Then we're actually going to train at both venues..
TW: Oh God
DERM: ...train at both venues, and not tell the media where we will be.
PIG: We're also getting a hold of that Batcar that Angry drove at Waverley that day. That will be the coaches car, and were gonna tint the windows so no-one will know who you are.
TW: Uhm, yer.. OK. Now what about Salary, what are you looking at paying your coach?
DERM: We've organised that guy with the sack full of peanuts to come around to your office everyday.
PIG: Oh OH OH... And on friday's we have donuts too.
DERM: They're our shout too.
...click.
PIG: So, whattya say Tezza?
DERM: We're mates aren't we?
PIG: Terry?
DERM: Maybe he's fixing his hair.
PIG: Terry? Hello Terry?
...10:55am end of call
Well it gave me a laugh at least
Oh, I didn't think it was badly written either. It's just that someone wanted a summary, and I gave a brief and concise one in my opinion.
As for people saying about Wallace wanting 2 times as much as everyone else, I can see the humour in that, pretty funny, however looking at the ladder right now, considering we were last, well he's definitely earning a fair amount of the money we're paying.
dipper86
20 Jul 2005, 21:19
Hawk! Whens Hardcore due back?
Hawk! Whens Hardcore due back?
I wish I knew :(
Hawk! Whens Hardcore due back?
Never.
dipper86
20 Jul 2005, 21:39
Never.
Did he get banned for life! thast a bit harsh dont you think?
Did he get banned for life! thast a bit harsh dont you think?
Given your posts in this thread you're trying to join him.
dipper86
20 Jul 2005, 21:54
Given your posts in this thread you're trying to join him.
That wasn't the question asked Fred. and thanks for deleting my post.
The Dice Man
1 Jun 2006, 15:34
TOP SECRET
The following telephone conversation took place on July 24, 2004 at 10:47AM between Dermott Brereton (DERM), Jason Dunstall (PIG) and Terry Wallace(TW). This convo was recorded by stealth by members of the ASIOCon security network, in the interests of improving football intelligence.
10:47am
PIG: Hey Tezza, it's Piggy here mate, how ya doin?
TW: Im quite well thank you Jason, how are you?
PIG: Maaate Im great, Ive just put down 4 steak & Kidney pies for breaky and Derm here is just fixing his hair for this call and he'll be here in a second.
(TW is heard muttering under his breath, while PIG sounds like he's licking somthing. Moments later Dermott is heard approaching the phone muttering something about the color in his hair fading.
DERM: Do you think my color is fading Jase?
PIG: Now is not the time Dermott. We have Terry on the line here to dicuss the coaching gig at the Hawks next year.
DERM: Terry? You mean Terry Wallace? Wooow, I didnt think he'd be interested in us.
TW Good mornining Dermott. I'm speaking to all clubs with vacant coaching positions, in order to get a feel as to where the clubs see themselves now, in the future, and what they want in a coach. What does Hawthorn want Dermott?
Derm: We want you Tezza
TW: That's flattering Dermott, but why do you want me?
DERM: Uhm.. well,...oh ..OH .. oh well we played in all those premierships together.
TW: You mean that's all you require, that is a coach who you played with?
PIG: Of course Terry, how do you think we got these jobs?
TW: Uhm, err, OK. Moving on, where do you see the Hawks next year?
DERM: Well we expected to win the premiership this year. If you remember Schwabbies comments.. oh see, another ex-hawk champ there, anyway remember Schwabb's comment that we will win the premiership this year?
TW: Yes
DERM: That was me! All mine that one. I told him to say it to boost the confidence in the boys.
TW: But that didn't really work out Dermott.
DERM: Nah, nah it didn't. It's all Schwabbies fault. He didn't say it right. What I've learnt in my time in the media is, is that you have to know when to hold em or fold em. In this case, Schwabby should've folded.
PIG: But he's an ex-Hawk. So he's still good value.
DERM: Yeah he is. I just wished we didnt have to sack him that night when he came back without cheese on our whoppers. You remember that Jase?
PIG: Nightmare Derm, absolute nightmare that night. He had it coming.
TW: Uhm, guys. Can we please get back to the coaching job. Now I'd like to know where you see the Hawks next year.
DERM: Well Terry, we see us at number 1 next year.
PIG: Yeah and number 2 too.
DERM: We want them both Terry.
TW: That's impossible! You cant finish first AND second!
DERM: He doesn't understand Jase.
PIG: Maybe he's not Hathorn material afterall?
DERM: Maybe.
TW: What the hell are you guys on about?
DERM: We want the number 1 and number 2 national draft picks in 2005 Terry, and we will do anything to get them. Even play a completley inexperienced side who are not ready for senior AFL football so it doesnt make you look like a bad coach, just someone without the cattle.
PIG: Yeah and too make it even easier, we're gonna make Vandenburg Captain!
TW: (under breath) Oh no.
DERM: We're gonna do what St.Kilda has gawn and done. We are gonna tank for 3 years trying to get the best 6 draft picks in that year. Now what we want you to do is just look after these guys, and hopefully by around 2007/8, Cornflakes is available and we can grab him.
PIG: Yep so we're going for a youth policy Tezza, we're gonna kick out the players like Graham, and we're not even gonna consider to play Holland.. We're simply paying him too much.
DERM: Yeah so to teach him we're gonna play him in teh VFL all year.
TW: I think Mark Graham still has a year left in him.
PIG: He's probably got 2 years you know, but we just can afford to have too much experience out there..just in case they win.
TW: What about the media? They'll be onto you.
DERM: Nah, we have that all sussed Tezza. We're actually building a second training centre and coaching quarters out at Waverley. Then we're actually going to train at both venues..
TW: Oh God
DERM: ...train at both venues, and not tell the media where we will be.
PIG: We're also getting a hold of that Batcar that Angry drove at Waverley that day. That will be the coaches car, and were gonna tint the windows so no-one will know who you are.
TW: Uhm, yer.. OK. Now what about Salary, what are you looking at paying your coach?
DERM: We've organised that guy with the sack full of peanuts to come around to your office everyday.
PIG: Oh OH OH... And on friday's we have donuts too.
DERM: They're our shout too.
...click.
PIG: So, whattya say Tezza?
DERM: We're mates aren't we?
PIG: Terry?
DERM: Maybe he's fixing his hair.
PIG: Terry? Hello Terry?
...10:55am end of call
History shows this transcript to be disturbingly accurate.
kahuna71
1 Jun 2006, 16:27
If you're not a writer (and you're not, very obviously) you should keep this rubbish for people who might give a :D:D:D:D out of duty, such as family and friends.
publish in public places? don't complain about the reviews.
absolute waste of perfectly good pixels.
harsh audience.
I have have seen worst attempts at humor on this board.
History shows the author of this transcript to be disturbing.
Agreed:thumbsu:
Jeremias
2 Jun 2006, 10:06
Dice Man, you definitely have WAY too much time on your hands. That, and the fact that the original post was verhy unfunny. Weak effort. Better luck next time, you'll get there eventually-even if it means upping your average posts to above 20 (which isn't far off, by the way!)
Bombers 2003
2 Jun 2006, 11:05
:D :p
I actually found the joke quite humerous
Is that because Pig and Dermie ARE Jokes?
Bombers 2003
2 Jun 2006, 11:07
Agreed:thumbsu:
Rather disturbed then disturbing:D :thumbsu:
Is that because Pig and Dermie ARE Jokes?
Dermott 'yes'
Dunstall 'NO'
I classify John Barnes as a 'JOKE'
Tim Watson is just a moron who can't coach :)
Bombers 2003
2 Jun 2006, 14:10
Tim Watson is just a moron who can't coach :)
He "cant"coach or he was allowed to develop a coaching style?
The TACHawks
3 Oct 2008, 12:25
TOP SECRET
The following telephone conversation took place on July 24, 2004 at 10:47AM between Dermott Brereton (DERM), Jason Dunstall (PIG) and Terry Wallace(TW). This convo was recorded by stealth by members of the ASIOCon security network, in the interests of improving football intelligence.
10:47am
PIG: Hey Tezza, it's Piggy here mate, how ya doin?
TW: Im quite well thank you Jason, how are you?
PIG: Maaate Im great, Ive just put down 4 steak & Kidney pies for breaky and Derm here is just fixing his hair for this call and he'll be here in a second.
(TW is heard muttering under his breath, while PIG sounds like he's licking somthing. Moments later Dermott is heard approaching the phone muttering something about the color in his hair fading.
DERM: Do you think my color is fading Jase?
PIG: Now is not the time Dermott. We have Terry on the line here to dicuss the coaching gig at the Hawks next year.
DERM: Terry? You mean Terry Wallace? Wooow, I didnt think he'd be interested in us.
TW Good mornining Dermott. I'm speaking to all clubs with vacant coaching positions, in order to get a feel as to where the clubs see themselves now, in the future, and what they want in a coach. What does Hawthorn want Dermott?
Derm: We want you Tezza
TW: That's flattering Dermott, but why do you want me?
DERM: Uhm.. well,...oh ..OH .. oh well we played in all those premierships together.
TW: You mean that's all you require, that is a coach who you played with?
PIG: Of course Terry, how do you think we got these jobs?
TW: Uhm, err, OK. Moving on, where do you see the Hawks next year?
DERM: Well we expected to win the premiership this year. If you remember Schwabbies comments.. oh see, another ex-hawk champ there, anyway remember Schwabb's comment that we will win the premiership this year?
TW: Yes
DERM: That was me! All mine that one. I told him to say it to boost the confidence in the boys.
TW: But that didn't really work out Dermott.
DERM: Nah, nah it didn't. It's all Schwabbies fault. He didn't say it right. What I've learnt in my time in the media is, is that you have to know when to hold em or fold em. In this case, Schwabby should've folded.
PIG: But he's an ex-Hawk. So he's still good value.
DERM: Yeah he is. I just wished we didnt have to sack him that night when he came back without cheese on our whoppers. You remember that Jase?
PIG: Nightmare Derm, absolute nightmare that night. He had it coming.
TW: Uhm, guys. Can we please get back to the coaching job. Now I'd like to know where you see the Hawks next year.
DERM: Well Terry, we see us at number 1 next year.
PIG: Yeah and number 2 too.
DERM: We want them both Terry.
TW: That's impossible! You cant finish first AND second!
DERM: He doesn't understand Jase.
PIG: Maybe he's not Hathorn material afterall?
DERM: Maybe.
TW: What the hell are you guys on about?
DERM: We want the number 1 and number 2 national draft picks in 2005 Terry, and we will do anything to get them. Even play a completley inexperienced side who are not ready for senior AFL football so it doesnt make you look like a bad coach, just someone without the cattle.
PIG: Yeah and too make it even easier, we're gonna make Vandenburg Captain!
TW: (under breath) Oh no.
DERM: We're gonna do what St.Kilda has gawn and done. We are gonna tank for 3 years trying to get the best 6 draft picks in that year. Now what we want you to do is just look after these guys, and hopefully by around 2007/8, Cornflakes is available and we can grab him.
PIG: Yep so we're going for a youth policy Tezza, we're gonna kick out the players like Graham, and we're not even gonna consider to play Holland.. We're simply paying him too much.
DERM: Yeah so to teach him we're gonna play him in teh VFL all year.
TW: I think Mark Graham still has a year left in him.
PIG: He's probably got 2 years you know, but we just can afford to have too much experience out there..just in case they win.
TW: What about the media? They'll be onto you.
DERM: Nah, we have that all sussed Tezza. We're actually building a second training centre and coaching quarters out at Waverley. Then we're actually going to train at both venues..
TW: Oh God
DERM: ...train at both venues, and not tell the media where we will be.
PIG: We're also getting a hold of that Batcar that Angry drove at Waverley that day. That will be the coaches car, and were gonna tint the windows so no-one will know who you are.
TW: Uhm, yer.. OK. Now what about Salary, what are you looking at paying your coach?
DERM: We've organised that guy with the sack full of peanuts to come around to your office everyday.
PIG: Oh OH OH... And on friday's we have donuts too.
DERM: They're our shout too.
...click.
PIG: So, whattya say Tezza?
DERM: We're mates aren't we?
PIG: Terry?
DERM: Maybe he's fixing his hair.
PIG: Terry? Hello Terry?
...10:55am end of call
Classic...Diceman even bumps his thread in Jan '06 :p
The Dice Man
3 Oct 2008, 15:20
:D I enjoyed it. :thumbsu: