Comical Simpsons Quotes as they apply to Footy and Footballers

[mojon95]

Brian: Your Drunk
Stewie: Your Sexy

Lara Bingle: Your Drunk
Fevola: Your Sexy

[Stokes-Selwood-Prismall]

http://home.clara.net/suspark/mack3.jpg http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/0/09/200px-2006_AFL_Hawthorn.jpg

[81 Points]

http://www.geelongadvertiser.com.au/images/uploadedfiles/editorial/pictures/2007/04/24/Ben-Cousins.jpg

Tape switched by Bart in answering machine plays song: Hello Mudda, Hello Fadda, Here I am at Camp Grenada...

Homer:Marge, did Lisa go to Camp Grenada?

[Barwick17]

http://www.theaflblog.com/images/judd.gif
IN REFERENCE TO CARLTON
Homer on the Monorail

Marge: - Homer, there is a man here who can help you!
Homer:- Batman?
Marge:- No, he's a scientist
Homer:- Batman's a scientist?
Marge:- It's not BATMAN!

[Barwick17]

http://www.saxton.com.au/saxton_db_data/images/Frawley_Danny.jpg

Homer - "I am so smart, I am so smart, S-M-R-T, I mean S-M-A-R-T!

[deedog2]

Marchers: We're here! We're queer! Get used to it!
Lisa: You do this every year! We are used to it.
Marcher: Spoilsport!

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/4/4c/HawthornHawks.jpg

[deedog2]

Fixing all that damage is going to be very
expensive.
Lovejoy: Yes, barring some sort of miracle. [looks
Heavenward, expectantly. Nothing happens] All
right, we'll help ourselves -- yet again.

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/5/5e/200px-Untitled-op.png

[Rory]

Lisa : Well, don't push her. Remember, it is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than open your mouth and remove all doubt.

Homers Brain: What does that mean? Better say something or they'll think you're stupid.
Homer: Takes one to know one.
Homers Brain: Swish!

http://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/03/27/lane_tim_200.jpg http://fifthestate.rmit.edu.au/images/articles/07102005095210-0.jpghttp://www.sen.com.au/web_images/ox.jpg

[Barwick17]

http://www.geocities.com/buckleysurfers2006/2006rd12didak1.jpg

Homer - I feel so much power when im holding a gun.... like God must feel when he's holding a gun" or words to those effects

[81 Points]

http://http://www.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,,5458384,00.jpghttp://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200702/r127725_418392.jpghttp://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/08/08/wbFOOTYratten_wideweb__470x319,0.jpg

Selma: It's like he just disappeared into fat air....
http://http://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/08/08/wbFOOTYratten_wideweb__470x319,0.jpg

[81 Points]

One for all the Dawks trolls (ya pricks... ):

http://www.southernfootball.com.au/images/afl_rtfc.gifhttp://richmondfc.com.au/portals/0/images/players/352324am.jpg
http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/4/4c/HawthornHawks.jpghttp://www.supastar.com.au/buddy.jpg

Lisa: Look, there's only one way to settle this. Rock-paper-scissors.
Lisa's brain: Poor predictable Bart. Always takes `rock'.
Bart's brain: Good ol' `rock'. Nuthin' beats that!
Bart: Rock!
Lisa: Paper.
Bart: D'oh!

:rolleyes::o:mad:

[Chazz M Michaels]

is this meant to be funny because they have the same shaped heads as lisa and bart respectively?

[Chazz M Michaels]

One for all the Dawks trolls (ya pricks... ):

http://richmondfc.com.au/portals/0/images/players/352324am.jpghttp://www.motoko.it/images/morpheus/monalisasimpson.jpg

http://www.supastar.com.au/buddy.jpghttp://images.easyart.com/i/prints/rw/en_easyart/sm/7/2/Simpsons---Bart-Simpson-Celebrity-Image-72600.jpg

Lisa: Look, there's only one way to settle this. Rock-paper-scissors.
Lisa's brain: Poor predictable Bart. Always takes `rock'.
Bart's brain: Good ol' `rock'. Nuthin' beats that!
Bart: Rock!
Lisa: Paper.
Bart: D'oh!

:rolleyes::o:mad:

maybe? maybe not?

[And_ROOS]

http://http://www.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,,5458384,00.jpghttp://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200702/r127725_418392.jpghttp://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/08/08/wbFOOTYratten_wideweb__470x319,0.jpg

Selma: It's like he just disappeared into fat air....
http://http://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/08/08/wbFOOTYratten_wideweb__470x319,0.jpg

Ahh poor Lance, looks like he sneezed into a milo tin. Obviously he wouldn't, as he would eat it all, but you get the idea.

[GuzzLG]

http://img.footywire.com/afl/img/player/11/stuart_dew.jpg
Jimbo: I heard that guy's ass has its own congressman.

[Barabbas]

Lisa : Well, don't push her. Remember, it is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than open your mouth and remove all doubt.

Homers Brain: What does that mean? Better say something or they'll think you're stupid.
Homer: Takes one to know one.
Homers Brain: Swish!



or...

http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200707/r159403_581301.jpg

[kane249]

http://mm.afl.com.au/Portals/0/images/clubs/freo/harveycoach137x80.jpg http://l.yimg.com/au.yimg.com/i/sp/afl/players/mark_johnson_980118_l.jpg http://l.yimg.com/au.yimg.com/i/sp/afl/players/kepler_bradley_230011_l.jpg


Ralph: I'll choose Ken Griffey Junior
Bart (Mark Harvey): I'll choose Milhouse
(Wade Boggs walks past)
Ralph: Mr Boggs will you be on my team?
(Wade Boggs jumps fence)
Wade Boggs: You got yourself a player kid
Bart: (Mark Harvey): Ok, I'll choose Lewis
(Jose Canseco walks past)
Ralph: I'll take Jose Canseco!
Bart: D'oh!

[Bender571]

Simpson Homer Simpson , he's the greatest guy in his-tor-y.
From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree.
D'oh!
http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200505/r47277_123877.jpg (http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200505/r47277_123876.jpg)http://www.theaflblog.com/images/ss.jpg


Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand!
http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200703/r134231_451165.jpg (http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200703/r134231_451171.jpg)
http://www.fullpointsfooty.net/images/Kangaslogo2006.jpg


Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/1770000/images/_1774719_chick300.jpg

[BK Eaglesfan]

Announcer: And away they go! It's chock Full o' Drugs, followed closely by Stalker, with Old Levis fading fast!
http://www.thewest.com.au/getfile.aspx?Type=image&ID=9699&ObjectType=3&ObjectID=20416http://www.saxton.com.au/saxton_db_data/images/Hutchison_Craig.jpg

[aaronm46]

time to revive this thread

[choco123]

seaman: it be no man! it be a remorseless eating machine!

http://mm.afl.com.au/afl_archive/cp2/c2/webi/article/285398dy.jpg

[RandB]

Marge: "That's a pretty lousy lesson."
Bill Clinton: "Hey, I'm a pretty lousy president."

http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200710/r189920_712956.jpg



"Call this an unfair generalization if you must, but old people are no good at everything." -- Moe Szyslak

http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200707/r159842_583614.jpg



"Poachers are nature's way of keeping the balance. Whenever there are so many species that people get confused and angry a poacher is born." -- Homer Simpson

http://seawolfkayaking.net/blog/media/chris_judd_blues.jpg

[huggy_b]

Dr. Nick: Hi everybody!
Homer+Bart: Hi Doctor Nick!
Nick: Now there are many options available for dangerously underweighted individuals like yourself. I recommend a slow steady gorging process combined with assal horizontology.
Homer: [pensive] Of course.
Nick: [points to a chart] You'll want to focus on the neglected food groups such as the whipped group, the congealed group and the chocotastic!
Homer: What can I do to speed the whole thing up, Doctor?
Nick: Well...be creative. Instead of making sandwiches with bread, use poptarts. Instead of chewing gum, chew bacon, heh...
Bart: You could brush your teeth with milkshakes!
Dr. Nick: Hey, did you go to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College too? And remember, if you're not sure about something, rub it against a piece of paper. If the paper turns clear, it's your window to weight gain. Bye bye, everybody!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v709/wombat01/stuartdew.jpg

[Ryder Is God]

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/6/6e/2006_AFL_Fremantle.jpg

Alex: Isn't that trophy case supposed to have trophies?
Lisa: Uh, they were all wiped out in the big trophy fire.
Skinner: [passing by] Ah, I see the trophies are still out for cleaning. Eh, Lisa?

[carnthedons07premiers]

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/6/6e/2006_AFL_Fremantle.jpg

Alex: Isn't that trophy case supposed to have trophies?
Lisa: Uh, they were all wiped out in the big trophy fire.
Skinner: [passing by] Ah, I see the trophies are still out for cleaning. Eh, Lisa?

GOLD

[BOPPER]

"Alright,time for a crime spree"


http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200604/r80641_232739.jpg

This one is winning IMO

Hahaha.:thumbsu:

[whippersnipper]

I'll give it two years:

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/5/5e/200px-Untitled-op.png

Homer: Oh Lisa, vampires aren't real. They're make believe, like elves, gremlins and eskimos.

[BOPPER]

Bart: I am through with working. Working is for chumps.
Homer: Son, I'm proud of you! I was twice your age when I figured that out.

http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:4k7e3j1_oL2gUM:http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2006/06/27/ablett_narrowweb__300x372,0.jpg (http://images.google.com.au/imgres?imgurl=http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2006/06/27/ablett_narrowweb__300x372,0.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2006/06/27/1151174168422.html&h=372&w=300&sz=13&hl=en&start=7&tbnid=4k7e3j1_oL2gUM:&tbnh=122&tbnw=98&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dgary%2Bablett%26gbv%3D2%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3Den) http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:6S-R6iLeoCf7PM:http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2005/06/26/27s_ablett1_wideweb__430x276.jpg (http://images.google.com.au/imgres?imgurl=http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2005/06/26/27s_ablett1_wideweb__430x276.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.theage.com.au/realfooty/news/afl/looking-for-signs-of-a-son-of-a-gun/2005/06/26/1119724524672.html&h=276&w=430&sz=14&hl=en&start=5&tbnid=6S-R6iLeoCf7PM:&tbnh=81&tbnw=126&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dnathan%2Bablett%26gbv%3D2%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3De n%26sa%3DG)

[BOPPER]

Homer: Marge, there's an empty spot I've always had inside me. I tried to fill it with family, religion, community service, but those were dead ends! I think this chair is the answer.



http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:kjgfzKmNmb28xM:http://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/10/31/wbMERGEroosmember_wideweb__470x316,0.jpg (http://images.google.com.au/imgres?imgurl=http://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/10/31/wbMERGEroosmember_wideweb__470x316,0.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.realfooty.com.au/news/news/fans-call-for-transparency-on-roos-relocation/2007/10/30/1193618889170.html&h=316&w=470&sz=42&hl=en&start=1&tbnid=kjgfzKmNmb28xM:&tbnh=87&tbnw=129&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dkangaroos%2Bsupporters%26gbv%3D2%26svnum%3D10%2 6hl%3Den%26sa%3DG)


http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:uSWIBXZNuNz-sM:http://www.mclabour.com.au/labourhire/images/mcg.jpg (http://images.google.com.au/imgres?imgurl=http://www.mclabour.com.au/labourhire/images/mcg.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.mclabour.com.au/labourhire/%3FMC_Labour_Hire/Project_Gallery&h=200&w=300&sz=20&hl=en&start=15&tbnid=uSWIBXZNuNz-sM:&tbnh=77&tbnw=116&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dmcg%26gbv%3D2%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3Den)

Any chair at the MCG roos supporters, fill them.

[BOPPER]

Homer: The problem in the world today is communication. Too much communication.

http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:TZwvnYFEHar__M:http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/73049804.jpg%3Fv%3D1%26c%3DViewImages%26k%3D2%26d%3D17A4AD9F DB9CF193CC300C081D9F47000541F093FE2FB0189B33FA4C489EC09EA55A 1E4F32AD3138 (http://images.google.com.au/imgres?imgurl=http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/73049804.jpg%3Fv%3D1%26c%3DViewImages%26k%3D2%26d%3D17A4AD9F DB9CF193CC300C081D9F47000541F093FE2FB0189B33FA4C489EC09EA55A 1E4F32AD3138&imgrefurl=http://www.viewimages.com/Search.aspx%3Fmid%3D73049804%26epmid%3D2%26partner%3DGoogle&h=415&w=594&sz=32&hl=en&start=2&tbnid=TZwvnYFEHar__M:&tbnh=94&tbnw=135&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dafl%2Bjohn%2Bbarnes%26gbv%3D2%26svnum%3D10%26hl %3Den%26sa%3DG)

[EagleMan87]

http://img.footywire.com/afl/img/player/15/nathan_g__brown.jpg
Peter Griffin: Oh, jeez, I spilled wine all over your shirt. You know what's good for getting stains out? Sex with another man.

or

Lois Griffin: Peter, did you paste a new picture of yourself on our wedding picture?
Peter Griffin: Yeah I think it looks better.
Lois Griffin: You pasted it over me!
Peter Griffin: Yeah I think it looks better.

[EagleMan87]

Brian Griffin (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0532235/): You got anything on that remote lower than Mute?
http://fifthestate.rmit.edu.au/images/articles/07102005095210-0.jpg

[EagleMan87]

http://www.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,,5355879,00.jpg
Auctioner: Our first item is a pair of panties confiscated from a prostitute.
Glen Quagmire (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0532235/): Fifty bucks.
Auctioner: She had nine STDs.
Glen Quagmire (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0532235/): Forty-five bucks.
Auctioner: And when we caught her she wet herself.
Glen Quagmire (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0532235/): Fifty bucks.

[Jolldo87]

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/6/6e/2006_AFL_Fremantle.jpg

Alex: Isn't that trophy case supposed to have trophies?
Lisa: Uh, they were all wiped out in the big trophy fire.
Skinner: [passing by] Ah, I see the trophies are still out for cleaning. Eh, Lisa?
:D:thumbsu:

[Port Adelaide]

http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2006/09/09/michaeloloughlin_wideweb__470x303,0.jpg

Chief Wiggum: Well let me ask you this: shut up.

[huggy_b]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v709/wombat01/2006_AFL_Hawthorn.jpg

Skinner: For Privacy's sake, lets call her Lisa S...Wait thats to ovious. How about L Simpson

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/7/72/West_coast_eagles_club_mascot.jpg


Bart Simpson: I'm the mascot of an evil corporation!

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://withmalice.files.wordpress.com/2007/08/andrew-demetriou.jpg

EPA Official: S-sir, I'm afraid you've gone mad with power...
Russ Cargill: Of course I have. You ever tried going mad without power? It's boring. No one listens to you!

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://l.yimg.com/au.yimg.com/i/sp/afl/players/kepler_bradley_230011_l.jpg http://www.efjfc.org.au/images/Fremantle%20FC.jpg

Bart Simpson: You just bought another load of crap from the world's fattest fertilizer sales man!

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://www.tasmaf.org.au/images/afl_rtfc.gifhttp://www.thesoaring.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/11/draft06.gif

Russ Cargill: Anyone can pick something when they know what it is; It takes real leadership to pick something you're clueless about.

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200504/r45690_118830.jpg

Homer Simpson: Homer do good?
Bart Simpson: Actually, you've doomed us all. Again.

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2004/05/31/hank_bulger,0.jpg http://www.mcg.org.au/content/image/00001468-image.jpg

Ned Flanders: The Good Lord is telling me to confess to something...
Homer Simpson: Gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay, gay...

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200709/r184005_682560.jpg

Santa's Little Helper: [subtitled] I did things no dog should. They will haunt me forever.

(I'm sure Carlton and West Coast fans will find polar opposite intepretations of what those 'things' were ;))

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://www.geelongadvertiser.com.au/images/uploadedfiles/editorial/pictures/2007/10/02/chris-judd-carlton.jpg

Dr. Nick: Bye, everybody!

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://www.elitesports.com.au/new/athlete_profiles/images/009a.jpg http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200508/r56645_154717.jpg

Cletus: Hey, I know how you feel; I was beat in tic-tac-toe by a chicken.

[Anti Gold Coast]

Somebody rented the Simpson's movie on DVD.

[BK Eaglesfan]

http://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/10/31/wbMERGEroosmember_wideweb__470x316,0.jpg

Bart: I don't know, just I don't know if you care about me or not!

[BK Eaglesfan]

Somebody rented the Simpson's movie on DVD.

Or got it for Xmas ;)

[Anti Gold Coast]

Or got it for Xmas ;)

Fair enough.

[High Voltage]

http://www.geelongadvertiser.com.au/images/uploadedfiles/editorial/pictures/2007/10/02/chris-judd-carlton.jpg

Everyone (at Carlton): Ooh! Aah.
Man 1 (Brett Ratten): What's normal to him amazes us.
Man 2 (Richard Pratt): He will be our new god.
Everyone (at Carlton): Yay!

[Toshowyouwhy]

Somebody rented the Simpson's movie on DVD.
TV Executive: I was just thinking that

[EagleMan87]

http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200504/r45690_118830.jpg
Frank Grimes: Oh, that's just my Degree in Nuclear Physics. I'm sure you all have one.
Lenny: Oh yeah, me and Carl both have a masters. Pfft, of course, old Homer here didn't need a degree. He just showed up the day they opened the plant!
Homer: Heh-heh, I didn't even know what a nuclear panaplant was!

[BigWardy12]

http://vibe.com.au/images/artist_archive/Byron_Pickett.jpgMarge: Homer, the plant called. They said if you don't show up tomorrow don't bother showing up on Monday.
Homer: Woo-hoo. Four-day weekend.

[BigWardy12]

http://www.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,,5673264,00.jpg
Ralph: Me fail English? That's unpossible.

[BigWardy12]

Marge: This is the worst thing you've ever done.
Homer: You say that so often that it lost its meaning.
http://www.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,,5705181,00.jpg

[emperor]

http://img177.imageshack.us/img177/3366/campbellbrown220013lqp0.jpg

Homer: I'll do it! I'll rob the Kwik-E-Mart

[TigerGlory]

http://home.vicnet.net.au/~dchawk/img/carlton2.jpg

Homer: How could you?! Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain Whatshisname? We live in a society of laws! Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well, I didn't hear anybody laughing, did you? Except at that guy who made sound effects.
*Makes sound effects and laughs.*
Where was I? Oh yeah! Stay out of my booze.

[jonesy86]

Bart: I am through with working. Working is for chumps.
Homer: Son, I'm proud of you! I was twice your age when I figured that out.

http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:4k7e3j1_oL2gUM:http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2006/06/27/ablett_narrowweb__300x372,0.jpg (http://images.google.com.au/imgres?imgurl=http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2006/06/27/ablett_narrowweb__300x372,0.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2006/06/27/1151174168422.html&h=372&w=300&sz=13&hl=en&start=7&tbnid=4k7e3j1_oL2gUM:&tbnh=122&tbnw=98&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dgary%2Bablett%26gbv%3D2%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3Den) http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:6S-R6iLeoCf7PM:http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2005/06/26/27s_ablett1_wideweb__430x276.jpg (http://images.google.com.au/imgres?imgurl=http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2005/06/26/27s_ablett1_wideweb__430x276.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.theage.com.au/realfooty/news/afl/looking-for-signs-of-a-son-of-a-gun/2005/06/26/1119724524672.html&h=276&w=430&sz=14&hl=en&start=5&tbnid=6S-R6iLeoCf7PM:&tbnh=81&tbnw=126&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dnathan%2Bablett%26gbv%3D2%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3De n%26sa%3DG)

GOLD! :thumbsu:

[Anti Gold Coast]

http://www.thewest.com.au/getfile.aspx?Type=image&ID=9699&ObjectType=3&ObjectID=20416

Marge: There's no shame in being a pariah.

[NiGHTFuRY]

http://vibe.com.au/images/artist_archive/Byron_Pickett.jpgMarge: Homer, the plant called. They said if you don't show up tomorrow don't bother showing up on Monday.
Homer: Woo-hoo. Four-day weekend.

LoL:D

[BigWardy12]

http://vibe.com.au/images/artist_archive/Jeff_Farmer3.jpg
Homer: It's true, I'm a Rageaholic.....I just can't live without Rageahol!

[whippersnipper]

http://www.heraldsun.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,1658,5773939,00.jpg

Homer: Where's my burrito?! Where's my burrito?! Where's my burrito?!

[kane249]

"I stand by my racial slur"
http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/39351000/jpg/_39351846_harbhajan_300.jpg

[shizzle]

http://www.heraldsun.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,1658,5773939,00.jpg

Comic Book Guy: Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.

[TigerGlory]

Bart & Lisa: Darrrryl, Darrrryl, Darrrryl
Marge: Kids thats not very nice.
Lisa: Mum, they're professional athletes. It roles right off their backs.

http://www.matera.com.au/crywoldt.jpg

[jonesy86]

http://www.heraldsun.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,1658,5773939,00.jpg

Homer: I'm wasting away! Oh…I'm down to a B-cup.

[Hawkamania!]

http://collingwoodfc.com.au/portals/0/images/players/magpies/__Sharrod_Wellingham_135px.jpg http://hawthornfc.com.au/portals/0/images/players/hawks/Lance_Franklin_L.jpg
Homer (left) and Barney (right)

Homer: Barney, give me your keys. You're too drunk to drive.
Barney: I'm fine.
Homer: OK, you leave me no option. [punches Barney]
Barney: Ow! What was that for?
Homer: I'm trying to knock you out.
[tries a little harder -- with a tire iron]
Barney: Ow! Cut it out.
[Homer tries slamming Barney's head in the car door]
Ow! [slam] Ow! [slam] Ow! [slam] Ow! [slam] Ow!
All right, here, take the keys. [hands Homer the keys]

Homer and Barney drive out of the brewery parking lot. On the way
out, they pass a mascot dressed as a giant beer stein. It turns out
that the mascot is actually Chief Wiggum on a stake-out. He talks
into his wallet, I mean, radio: "Look alive, boys -- a couple of
stewed prunes heading your way."

A phalanx of motorcycle cops peels out from behind a billboard.
Homer sees them, and pulls over.

Homer: [standing on one foot and singing "The Alphabet Song"]
W, X, Y, and Z. Now I know my ABCs, won't you come and play
with me.
Eddie: Flawless.
Lou: We also would have accepted, "tell me what you think of me."
Eddie: Well, I guess your free to...
Barney: Give him the breathalyzer!
Homer: Huh?
[Eddie sticks it in Homer's mouth. It beeps]
Lou: You're under arrest!
Homer: D'oh!

Wiggum, still in the stein suit, lets Barney drive home. "Think you
can get this car home?" "Sure thing, giant beer."

With thanks to http://www.snpp.com/episodes/9F14.html.

[Stokes-Selwood-Prismall]

Homer: Lets just call them Mr X and Mrs Y.

http://www.geelongadvertiser.com.au/images/uploadedfiles/editorial/pictures/2007/09/01/daylan-howard.jpg

http://www.foxsports.com.au/common/imagedata/0,5001,5438703,00.jpg http://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2007/08/05/FRANKLIN_300.jpg

[hawka_fan]

who's the top bloke?

[SJT76]

who's the top bloke?

:( Oh dear... from under my rock in Vietnam I know who that is... here's an old lawyer's tip that might apply to Bay 13 trolling - don't ask a question you don't know the answer to.

[#1 Dogs Fan]

My cats breath smell like cat food. Scarlett

[hawka_fan]

:( Oh dear... from under my rock in Vietnam I know who that is... here's an old lawyer's tip that might apply to Bay 13 trolling - don't ask a question you don't know the answer to.
ive heard the name, would have NFI what Dylan howard looks like

[the_big_sav]

hope these have not come up yet

http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200709/r187323_699099.jpg (knights)

Homer: Hey, Flanders (knights)! You're the worst coach this team has ever had!
Marge: He's the only coach this team has ever had… and the season hasn't even started yet!
Homer: Yeah, well… he's wearing that hat like an idiot.


http://aftergrogblog.blogs.com/agb/images/Ben-Cousins-That-Hat.jpg (cousins)

Homer (cousins): Fame was like a drug, but what was even more like a drug were the drugs.

(ratten)
http://www.theage.com.au/ffxImage/urlpicture_id_1058035006945_2003/07/15/16s_ratten,0.jpg
(whitnall)
http://www.abc.net.au/reslib/200702/r127725_418392.jpg
(fevola)
http://news.bbc.co.uk/media/images/39618000/jpg/_39618627_aussie_rules_300_300.jpg

Troy McClure (ratten): HI. I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such self help tapes as 'Smoke yourself thin' and 'Get confident, Stupid!


http://www.saxton.com.au/saxton_db_data/images/Hutchison_Craig.jpg
Moe (hutchy): Hi, my name's Moe. Or as the ladies like to refer to me, 'hey you in the bushes'

[kane249]

http://aftergrogblog.blogs.com/agb/images/Ben-Cousins-That-Hat.jpg (cousins)

Homer (cousins): Fame was like a drug, but what was even more like a drug were the drugs.


Not only has it been done, it's been done to death

[the_big_sav]

yeh i thought it sounded familiar

[GuzzLG]

http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2005/12/22/300_richardpratt.jpg
Blackheart: I've had lots of jobs in my day: whale-hunter, seal-clubber, president of the Fox network, and, like most people, yeah, I've dealt a little ivory.

[Ryder Is God]

http://www.latrobe.edu.au/alumni/assets/images/AD_Agora2003.jpg

http://www.bomberblitz.com/%7Ermered/images/North-logo-2007.gif

http://about.theage.com.au/userimages/Caroline_Wilson.jpg

Burns: What's that you say? You can live without television so long as
you have _beer_?
Homer: [defiantly] That's right.
Burns: [ominously] Wrong. All beer trucks heading towards Springfield
have been diverted...this town will be as dry as a bone. And if
the rest of you beer-swilling tube-jockeys out there have a
problem with this, talk to Homer Simpson.
[The doorbell rings, and Homer answers it]
Barney: [brandishing a gun] Homer, give him what he wants!

[RandB]

Bart: “I never thought it was humanly possible, but this both sucks and blows.”

http://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/10/31/wbMERGEroosmember_wideweb__470x316,0.jpg

[Hard Ball Get]

Rainier Wolfcastle: My eyes! The goggles do nothing!

http://www.fullpointsfooty.net/images/NSWToCCarey.jpg

[Zarko]

Rainier Wolfcastle: My eyes! The goggles do nothing!

http://www.fullpointsfooty.net/images/NSWToCCarey.jpg
lol great :D

[Raskolnikov]

http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a230/raskdog/waynecarey_wideweb__470x2740.jpg

Homer: "It's true, I'm a Rageaholic.....I just can't live without Rageahol!"

[Crimson King]

^ Good one. :thumbsu:

[FiveStrings]

who's the top bloke?

I'm sure Dylan Howard's never been called that before.

[FiveStrings]

http://img.footywire.com/afl/img/player/10/tom_harley.jpghttp://img.footywire.com/afl/img/player/10/steve_johnson.jpg

Chief Wiggum: That's some nice reckless driving, Mr B.

[rupert pupkin 87]

http://www.geelongadvertiser.com.au/images/uploadedfiles/editorial/pictures/2007/10/02/chris-judd-carlton.jpg

Everyone (at Carlton): Ooh! Aah.
Man 1 (Brett Ratten): What's normal to him amazes us.
Man 2 (Richard Pratt): He will be our new god.
Everyone (at Carlton): Yay!


hahaha that's gold it's fuuny because it is true

[GuzzLG]

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v709/wombat01/stuartdew.jpg
Bart: I could sure go for 100 tacos right about now.

(In honour of the 100th page).

[Anthony_]

http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a230/raskdog/waynecarey_wideweb__470x2740.jpg

Police : Can we come in?

Snake : Sorry, pig. We can't make that promise.

[Zarko]

http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a230/raskdog/waynecarey_wideweb__470x2740.jpg

Police : Can we come in?

Snake : Sorry, pig. We can't make that promise.
:D...

[FiveStrings]

(this one hurts)

http://www.thewest.com.au/getfile.aspx?Type=image&ID=89702&ObjectType=3&ObjectID=77103

Jimbo: Hey! You're that drunken posse. Wow...can I join ya?

http://germworks.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/kerr.jpghttp://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2007/03/14/svFLETCHER_narrowweb__300x471.jpg

Homer: I don't know...can you swing a sack of door knobs?
Jimbo: Can I?
Homer: You're in! Here's the sack.
Moe: But you gotta supply your own knobs.

[Anti Gold Coast]

(this one hurts)

http://www.thewest.com.au/getfile.aspx?Type=image&ID=89702&ObjectType=3&ObjectID=77103

Jimbo: Hey! You're that drunken posse. Wow...can I join ya?

http://germworks.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/kerr.jpghttp://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2007/03/14/svFLETCHER_narrowweb__300x471.jpg

Homer: I don't know...can you swing a sack of door knobs?
Jimbo: Can I?
Homer: You're in! Here's the sack.
Moe: But you gotta supply your own knobs.

Lol how true.

[Anti Gold Coast]

http://www.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,,5470930,00.jpg

Hans Molman: Drinking has ruined my life, I'm 31 year old.

[SouthSwans]

(this one hurts)

http://www.thewest.com.au/getfile.aspx?Type=image&ID=89702&ObjectType=3&ObjectID=77103

Jimbo: Hey! You're that drunken posse. Wow...can I join ya?

http://germworks.net/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/kerr.jpghttp://www.theage.com.au/ffximage/2007/03/14/svFLETCHER_narrowweb__300x471.jpg

Homer: I don't know...can you swing a sack of door knobs?
Jimbo: Can I?
Homer: You're in! Here's the sack.
Moe: But you gotta supply your own knobs.
Brilliant.

[2 Dogs]

http://www.ph.unimelb.edu.au/~sandor/trivia/Gary_Ablett.jpghttp://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/09/30/GALL_FIELD_SS4_gallery__470x380.jpg

Homer: Hello son. Where have you been?
Bart: Playing with Milhouse.
Homer: NO YOU HAVEN'T! You've been out galavanting around with that floozy of a bigger brother. Haven't you? HAVEN'T YOU? Look at me!

[tin can sam]

I won't quote it, but the Chris Masten one is absolute gold.

[triplejdude]

http://www.ph.unimelb.edu.au/%7Esandor/trivia/Gary_Ablett.jpghttp://www.realfooty.com.au/ffximage/2007/09/30/GALL_FIELD_SS4_gallery__470x380.jpg

Homer: Hello son. Where have you been?
Bart: Playing with Milhouse.
Homer: NO YOU HAVEN'T! You've been out galavanting around with that floozy of a bigger brother. Haven't you? HAVEN'T YOU? Look at me!

HAHA
Gold :D

[Ron The Bear]

A woman is like a beer. They smell good. They look good. You'd step over your own mother just to get one...[glug glug glug]...But you can't stop at one - you want to drink another woman...

http://www.heraldsun.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,1658,5861781,00.jpg

[MightyFighting]

http://i12.photobucket.com/albums/a230/raskdog/waynecarey_wideweb__470x2740.jpg

Woman 1: He a monster!
Woman 2: Run, children!

[deedog2]

http://www.news.com.au/common/imagedata/0,,5472971,00.jpg
Homer: We've been together a long time, now. When are we gonna ... you know?Marge: Soon. I just need a few more yoga classes.

[deedog2]

http://www.latrobe.edu.au/alumni/profiles/images/AD_Agora2003_000.jpg Homer: Oh, I get it. When I'm crushing and killing you, you don't like me. But when can save your life, suddenly I'm Mr. Popular.Lenny: Yeah, that's pretty much it.Homer: Woo hoo! I'm Mr. Popular!

[deedog2]

http://mm.afl.com.au/afl_archive/cp2/c2/webi/article/285398dy.jpg

Homer: [yawns] I haven't had buffalo in six hours. Marge, how about whipping up some buffalo sausage, huevos buffaleros, and some fresh-squeezed buffalo J.Marge: The buffalo are gone. I think you shot them all.