Ford Fairlane
22nd November 2006, 15:30
Is your old (or current) high school listed here? Fortunately mine isn't, although I suppose we'd have been lumped in with Salisbury High. (and no I didn't make this list up ;) )
How many students does it take to change a lightbulb in Adelaide
schools?
Scotch College
Two - one to call the electrician and one to call their father to pay the cheque.
St Peters
Two - one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.
CBC
Eleven - one to change the lightbulb and ten to share the experience when he bends over.
Elizabeth High School
None - Elizabeth doesn't have electricity.
Concordia
Two - One to change the lightbulb and one to crack under the pressure.
St Ignatius
Just one. The school captain comes back after finishing year 12 and the headmaster stands by to congratulate him on his achievements.
Parafield Gardens High
None - looks better in the dark anyway.
Loreto
None - they're all too busy playing touch football, wearing their pearls and their groundsmen will do it anyway.
UniSA
Seventy-six - one to change the lightbulb, fifty to protest the light bulb's right to not change, and twenty-five to hold a counter protest.
Gepps Cross Girls
None - These girls don't have time to change a lightbulb, they're too busy looking up each others skirts.
Salisbury High
None - Salisbury looks better in the dark.
Annesly
One - she holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
Cabra Dominican College
Twenty - one to change it and 19 to make a song and dance about the emotion they went through while changing the lightbulb.
Prince Alfred College
Five - one to design a nuclear powered one that never needs changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Adelaide using that nuked lightbulb, two to install it, and one to write the computer program.
St Aloysius
Five - One to change the lightbulb and four to find her the perfect outfit to wear for the occasion.
Modbury Heights
Three - one to change it and two to figure out how to get high off the old one.
Rostrevor
Ten - one to change it, one back up if the first guy's too drunk and the other eight to pray that it works.
Adelaide Uni
Four - one to change it, one to call Parliament about their progress, and two to throw the old bulb at Flinders students.
Brighton High School
Two - one to change the bulb and the other to say loudly how she did it as well as a private school student.
Mary MacKillop
Three - one to change it and the other two to stand up on chairs on either side of her with cans of hairspray just in case of the emergency that her 20cm high fringe drops 1cm.
Seaton High School
Five - one to change the bulb and four to do an interpretive dance about it.
St Michael's High School
None - they've finally learnt that when you're that stoned, light hurts your eyes, so it's better just to leave it alone.
Trinity College
Nine Hundred - Changing a light bulb would be like going on an excursion for these guys, so the whole school would turn up for the celebration.
Pembroke
Eight - it's not that one isn't smart enough to do it, it's just that they're all violently twitching from too much stress.
Pulteney Grammar
None - No one wants to get their hands dirty.
St Peter's Girls
None - they are all too drunk to notice.
St Dominic's
None - It's not that they can't do it, they just look better with the lights off.
OLSH
Thirty - 1 to call the electrician and 29 to flirt with him when he arrives.
Sacred Heart
Ninteen- one to chage it and 18 to play footy when it's done
Reynella East High School
Change them? Is that what they're meant to be used for?
Aberfoyle Park
Four - 2 to steal the new bulb, 1 to take out the old one and 1 to throw it at passing cars.
Blackfriars
Fourteen - 2 to look out for a teacher while the other 12 see who can piss high enough to reach it.
Thomas More College
Ten - 1 to change the light bulb, 2 to get smashed and drunk because of it and 7 more to "support" the person who is changing by cheering him on and giving them weed.
St Paul's
Five - 1 to change the light bulb and the other 4 to bash him up cos he's gay.
Siena College
Four - one to change the light bulb, one to stare up her skirt while she does it, one to hold the vodka bottle and the other to ring around making bomb threats to St Michael's and searching for PAC parties - to scab the free alcohol.
Daws Road
Eighty-Two - 1 to take the old lightbulb out and 81 to figure out how to make it work again because they can't afford a new one.
St Mary's
Only one, but it takes 3 others to bitch-slap her because she was getting all the attention.
Walford
Two - 1 to change the light, one to jump around because it's the most exciting thing that's ever happened there.
Wilderness
Twenty - 1 to change it and 19 to bitch about it.
Mitcham Girls
Ten - 1 to change it, 4 to hold a memorial service for being such a strong female lightbulb that did women-kind proud, and 5 to boast about how they didn't need a man to change their light.
Unley High
One - one uses his mobile to call someone else to fix it, the rest of the boys are at shoppo, smoking and gelling their hair for when the Siena buses arrive...
Norwood-Morialta High
Five - one to change it after the other 4 have organised a student committee to look into lighting matters and how it affects students.
Marryatville
Twenty-one - one to change it, 20 to write a song about it.
Cabra
None - if its got nothing to basketball they dont care and there to busy trying to get people picking up papers anyway
Temple College
One Hundred - one to change the light bulb and 99 to praise and worship God for the life of the light bulb and to celebrate the new light bulb and have a huge service about the 'going out of the old and bringing in of the new'.
Henley High
two-One to change the light bulb and one to chop up the session...
How many students does it take to change a lightbulb in Adelaide
schools?
Scotch College
Two - one to call the electrician and one to call their father to pay the cheque.
St Peters
Two - one to mix the martinis and one to call the electrician.
CBC
Eleven - one to change the lightbulb and ten to share the experience when he bends over.
Elizabeth High School
None - Elizabeth doesn't have electricity.
Concordia
Two - One to change the lightbulb and one to crack under the pressure.
St Ignatius
Just one. The school captain comes back after finishing year 12 and the headmaster stands by to congratulate him on his achievements.
Parafield Gardens High
None - looks better in the dark anyway.
Loreto
None - they're all too busy playing touch football, wearing their pearls and their groundsmen will do it anyway.
UniSA
Seventy-six - one to change the lightbulb, fifty to protest the light bulb's right to not change, and twenty-five to hold a counter protest.
Gepps Cross Girls
None - These girls don't have time to change a lightbulb, they're too busy looking up each others skirts.
Salisbury High
None - Salisbury looks better in the dark.
Annesly
One - she holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
Cabra Dominican College
Twenty - one to change it and 19 to make a song and dance about the emotion they went through while changing the lightbulb.
Prince Alfred College
Five - one to design a nuclear powered one that never needs changing, one to figure out how to power the rest of Adelaide using that nuked lightbulb, two to install it, and one to write the computer program.
St Aloysius
Five - One to change the lightbulb and four to find her the perfect outfit to wear for the occasion.
Modbury Heights
Three - one to change it and two to figure out how to get high off the old one.
Rostrevor
Ten - one to change it, one back up if the first guy's too drunk and the other eight to pray that it works.
Adelaide Uni
Four - one to change it, one to call Parliament about their progress, and two to throw the old bulb at Flinders students.
Brighton High School
Two - one to change the bulb and the other to say loudly how she did it as well as a private school student.
Mary MacKillop
Three - one to change it and the other two to stand up on chairs on either side of her with cans of hairspray just in case of the emergency that her 20cm high fringe drops 1cm.
Seaton High School
Five - one to change the bulb and four to do an interpretive dance about it.
St Michael's High School
None - they've finally learnt that when you're that stoned, light hurts your eyes, so it's better just to leave it alone.
Trinity College
Nine Hundred - Changing a light bulb would be like going on an excursion for these guys, so the whole school would turn up for the celebration.
Pembroke
Eight - it's not that one isn't smart enough to do it, it's just that they're all violently twitching from too much stress.
Pulteney Grammar
None - No one wants to get their hands dirty.
St Peter's Girls
None - they are all too drunk to notice.
St Dominic's
None - It's not that they can't do it, they just look better with the lights off.
OLSH
Thirty - 1 to call the electrician and 29 to flirt with him when he arrives.
Sacred Heart
Ninteen- one to chage it and 18 to play footy when it's done
Reynella East High School
Change them? Is that what they're meant to be used for?
Aberfoyle Park
Four - 2 to steal the new bulb, 1 to take out the old one and 1 to throw it at passing cars.
Blackfriars
Fourteen - 2 to look out for a teacher while the other 12 see who can piss high enough to reach it.
Thomas More College
Ten - 1 to change the light bulb, 2 to get smashed and drunk because of it and 7 more to "support" the person who is changing by cheering him on and giving them weed.
St Paul's
Five - 1 to change the light bulb and the other 4 to bash him up cos he's gay.
Siena College
Four - one to change the light bulb, one to stare up her skirt while she does it, one to hold the vodka bottle and the other to ring around making bomb threats to St Michael's and searching for PAC parties - to scab the free alcohol.
Daws Road
Eighty-Two - 1 to take the old lightbulb out and 81 to figure out how to make it work again because they can't afford a new one.
St Mary's
Only one, but it takes 3 others to bitch-slap her because she was getting all the attention.
Walford
Two - 1 to change the light, one to jump around because it's the most exciting thing that's ever happened there.
Wilderness
Twenty - 1 to change it and 19 to bitch about it.
Mitcham Girls
Ten - 1 to change it, 4 to hold a memorial service for being such a strong female lightbulb that did women-kind proud, and 5 to boast about how they didn't need a man to change their light.
Unley High
One - one uses his mobile to call someone else to fix it, the rest of the boys are at shoppo, smoking and gelling their hair for when the Siena buses arrive...
Norwood-Morialta High
Five - one to change it after the other 4 have organised a student committee to look into lighting matters and how it affects students.
Marryatville
Twenty-one - one to change it, 20 to write a song about it.
Cabra
None - if its got nothing to basketball they dont care and there to busy trying to get people picking up papers anyway
Temple College
One Hundred - one to change the light bulb and 99 to praise and worship God for the life of the light bulb and to celebrate the new light bulb and have a huge service about the 'going out of the old and bringing in of the new'.
Henley High
two-One to change the light bulb and one to chop up the session...