Nige_Bix
23 Apr 2003, 12:37
I thought this topical!!
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CRICKET
Iraqi Information Minister arrested in Trinidad
by STAFF REPORTERS
Iraqi information minister Mohammed Saeed al Sahaf has been arrested by British-led special forces, who discovered him standing as an umpire in the second Test between Australia and the West Indies in Port of Spain, Trinidad.
Al Sahaf was apprehended after the third day of the match, after a long string of increasingly unlikely decisions. US intelligence officials admitted that in a cricket match Al Sahaf had found almost the perfect cover.
"To begin with, only Condoleezza Rice had heard of cricket, and even she thought it was played on horses," said US General Tommy Franks. "Plus the wily old fox was officiating under an assumed name. Asoka de Silva - I mean, how cunning is that?"
British Special Operations Officer Reginald Clomley said Al Sahaf was given away only when he went a step too far. "De Silva was officiating like a blind man stricken with Tourette Syndrome," he said. "But of course this sort of thing happens all the time in cricket."
"It was only when he fired Haydos and Justin (Langer) on Thursday that we knew for sure. No genuine umpire could give the nod with the ball pitching as far outside leg as that."
"Plus he kept making those speeches after the match about the brains of the pig-dog Australians being roasted in hell," Clomley added.
Al Sahaf said he was not disappointed his time on the run had ended, and that in fact he had "not been captured at all".
"In fact, I have captured thousands of British troops with my own hands," he told the Bladder. "Even as we speak all of the infidel forces are entirely at my mercy. With the help of Allah I will bring down my judgement upon them. Bang! You are caught behind - what a big nick. Hah! Lbw! Plumb in front. Bowled him, it's all over. Stumped, you are gone too! Everybody is out for a duck," he said, as British officials led him away.
----------------------------
CRICKET
Iraqi Information Minister arrested in Trinidad
by STAFF REPORTERS
Iraqi information minister Mohammed Saeed al Sahaf has been arrested by British-led special forces, who discovered him standing as an umpire in the second Test between Australia and the West Indies in Port of Spain, Trinidad.
Al Sahaf was apprehended after the third day of the match, after a long string of increasingly unlikely decisions. US intelligence officials admitted that in a cricket match Al Sahaf had found almost the perfect cover.
"To begin with, only Condoleezza Rice had heard of cricket, and even she thought it was played on horses," said US General Tommy Franks. "Plus the wily old fox was officiating under an assumed name. Asoka de Silva - I mean, how cunning is that?"
British Special Operations Officer Reginald Clomley said Al Sahaf was given away only when he went a step too far. "De Silva was officiating like a blind man stricken with Tourette Syndrome," he said. "But of course this sort of thing happens all the time in cricket."
"It was only when he fired Haydos and Justin (Langer) on Thursday that we knew for sure. No genuine umpire could give the nod with the ball pitching as far outside leg as that."
"Plus he kept making those speeches after the match about the brains of the pig-dog Australians being roasted in hell," Clomley added.
Al Sahaf said he was not disappointed his time on the run had ended, and that in fact he had "not been captured at all".
"In fact, I have captured thousands of British troops with my own hands," he told the Bladder. "Even as we speak all of the infidel forces are entirely at my mercy. With the help of Allah I will bring down my judgement upon them. Bang! You are caught behind - what a big nick. Hah! Lbw! Plumb in front. Bowled him, it's all over. Stumped, you are gone too! Everybody is out for a duck," he said, as British officials led him away.