View Full Version : Toast The RatZero Comedy Tour - coming to the MCG this Friday
Ben the Gooner
2 Aug 2010, 16:33
Ladies and Gentlemen, and even Carlton fans,
It's been three years already. Three years since BF's greatest minds on the Bay dubbed Brett Ratten "RatZero", for his 0-7 record as caretaker coach was successful enough for him to be appointed senior coach. Now while this has a question mark over it, from Carlton's dubious moral practises in 2007 in an effort to pick Matthew Kreuzer (naively in the end, seeing as Tom Bellchambers was available in the pre-season draft), and the name subsequently died out as another fad passed through the Bay, and Ratten managed to face some opponents that even he couldn't lose to, his legacy as RatZero lived on, carried by the custodians clad in red and black.
Indeed, this Friday is a celebration of that heady time, the Era of RatZero. For it is this Friday when the legend of the 0-7 record is to be equalled.
And so, I call on thee, disciples of the legend that is RatZero, to join with me in celebration of this sacred feast.
http://images.slatterymedia.com/images/thumbs/450/2009/06/26/184709.jpg
Ben the Gooner
2 Aug 2010, 16:44
Carlton fans - this thread is yours until Friday, whereupon it will be closed just prior to the game, and reopened only if we win.
Feel free to post outside of it if you want to discuss the game seriously (always welcomed), but be warned that trolling outside of here, will be met with a red card.
Carlton fans - this thread is yours until Friday, whereupon it will be closed just prior to the game, and reopened only if we win.
Feel free to post outside of it if you want to discuss the game seriously (always welcomed), but be warned that trolling outside of here, will be met with a red card.
May as well leave it shut then because this thread will have a short life! :p
Anyways fellow Bomber flogs it is good to be here again and let the banter begin and Matty Knights demise start as we bounce back with a crushing victory to finally lay your season to rest. :thumbsu:
On a serious note i am looking forward to some banter and these threads are allways good and in the right spirits. The winning streak is over and your time has come Bumbers no more wins against us. :D
krayfesh
2 Aug 2010, 16:56
Our midfielders are having their upper limbs replaced with metal arms.
Game over.
Ben the Gooner
2 Aug 2010, 16:58
Our midfielders are having their upper limbs replaced with metal arms.
Game over.
I think it's going to rain on Friday. Outsmarted again.
I think it's going to rain on Friday. Outsmarted again.
Stainless steel says hi! ;)
Ben the Gooner
2 Aug 2010, 17:03
Look, I can't blame you for go to any length, but this is futile.
Your midfield of plodders is already too slow for ours. You're only making it worse.
What's the rarest thing in the world?
A Carlton midfielder who runs the other way. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
We'll finally get to see Yarran vs Hurley and just how much of a clown Wayne Hughes is for rating the former higher.
The most amusing thing about that draft is that Zaharakis is already twice the player that Yarran is.
Donakebab
2 Aug 2010, 17:05
Our midfielders are having their upper limbs replaced with metal arms.
Game over.
Did you say metal arms...?
Not again...
The most amusing thing about that draft is that Zaharakis is already twice the player that Yarran is.
Meh..... Zara is living off 1 game winning goal that beat the filthy Pie ferals and thats all he has done and will ever do!
I must admit i watched that game and woooed that goal to go through as well!! Not bad for a fluke. :cool:
We'll finally get to see Yarran vs Hurley and just how much of a clown Wayne Hughes is for rating the former higher.
The most amusing thing about that draft is that Zaharakis is already twice the player that Yarran is.
Too far Guzz. Way too far. I mean have you ever seen a first year player kick a 25 meter drop punt? I THINK NOT.
zYDe-paMdI4
Too far Guzz. Way too far. I mean have you ever seen a first year player kick a 25 meter drop punt? I THINK NOT.
zYDe-paMdI4
Wow :eek:
That is easily the most remarkable kick of the last decade. This would have to be the greatest thing ever put up on youtube.
I assume its views are in the 10s of millions?
I assume its views are in the 10s of millions?
99 Prelim has that honour. :D
Ludwig van Bertstare
2 Aug 2010, 17:21
Made this a couple of years ago
http://img696.imageshack.us/img696/2448/legendofzero.jpg
93 Prelim has that honour. :D
Was a great game. :thumbsu:
Nice typo. :D
Frothies Mcveigh
2 Aug 2010, 17:22
Lachie Henderson >>>>> Michael Hurley.
Donakebab
2 Aug 2010, 17:22
93 Prelim has that honour. :D
That 93 Prelim was awesome! Second half Longy tore them to bits. And I'll always remember Timmy's goal at the end.
Good times. :thumbsu:
Ben Howlett> Marc MurphyObvious.
Our midfielders are having their upper limbs replaced with metal arms.
Game over.PP:
http://i33.tinypic.com/2v3lqop.jpg
Wow :eek:
That is easily the most remarkable kick of the last decade. This would have to be the greatest thing ever put up on youtube.
I assume its views are in the 10s of millions?
93 Prelim has that honour. :D
Ahh yes... was a great game...
1mAbthWq-js
This one a week later was slightly better though...
rpYUhb98tsI
Beautiful vision. :thumbsu:
Prismall > Gibbs.No brainer.
Hardingham > ........
Can't even think of a carlton forward to put there that gives that statement a hint of sarcasm.
Was a great game. :thumbsu:
Nice typo. :D
lol you got me!!! Basterds!!! :D
At least you knew what i was referring to! :thumbsu::thumbsu:
Cant believe i put 93 instead of 99!! Lulz long day at work today!!
Donakebab
2 Aug 2010, 17:55
lol you got me!!! Basterds!!! :D
At least you knew what i was referring to! :thumbsu::thumbsu:
Cant believe i put 93 instead of 99!! Lulz long day at work today!!
It's okay, we can understand everyone at heart wanting to be an Essendon fan. Don't fight it, you just can't hide it....
It's okay, we can understand everyone at heart wanting to be an Essendon fan. Don't fight it, you just can't hide it....
Didnt take long either for 5 blokes to quote me as well!!! I was looking at another board and came back 10 mins later only to see my error!!
*Insert facepalm!! * :D
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 18:03
No brainer.
He sure is, but Phone still looks like Einstein compared to most Essendon fans :thumbsu:
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 18:05
Hardingham > ........
Can't even think of a carlton forward to put there that gives that statement a hint of sarcasm.
Hampson & Grigg >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Jetta and Hislop :)
Donakebab
2 Aug 2010, 18:06
He sure is, but Phone still looks like Einstein compared to most Essendon fans :thumbsu:
But Einstein wasn't a ranga... :confused:
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 18:11
But Einstein wasn't a ranga... :confused:
I didn't realise Phone was a ranga sorry, in that case......
http://i29.tinypic.com/1087n02.gif
Lance Uppercut
2 Aug 2010, 18:24
so, Ratten's never beaten Knights, right?
Carlton's best chance of winning would be if Kernahan, Bradley, Williams and Madden played from their wheelchairs...
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 18:29
R8VYy4ZFQaE
Round 20 2007 -
Przkz1BIkLQ
Round 3 2008 -
OM6N-Wieaiw
Round 13 2008 -
GpwWAU4-wts
Round 3 2009 -
d4YcBZvU0qY
Round 13 2009 -
fkRLriGibtk
Round 3 2010 -
YIcrZ2nnuI0
I was going to post a youtube clip, but couldn't decide which of the 6 games to choose.
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 18:39
I was going to post a youtube clip, but couldn't decide which of the 6 games to choose.
True, they are all pretty meaningless when you always finish below us on the ladder anyway ;)
True, they are all pretty meaningless when you always finish below us on the ladder anyway ;)
Finishing above us is pretty meaningless when it means missing out on Hurley and Melksham for Yarran and Lucas. :)
Ben the Gooner
2 Aug 2010, 18:42
Hampson & Grigg >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Jetta and Hislop :)
Gumbleton
http://www.essendonfc.com.au/news/news.asp?nid=7681
“He was terrifically courageous last night. He put his hand up to come back on the ground because he wanted to keep playing,” Hamilton said.
http://www.essendonfc.com.au/news/news.asp?nid=7681
http://www.essendonfc.com.au/images/10/2010rd3-30.jpg
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Gibbs
bvXYAazPJnA
Classic Hughes, even manages to **** up a number 1 pick.:o
so, Ratten's never beaten Knights, right?
Nay, never beaten Essendon.
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 18:50
Gumbleton>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Gibbs
I won't bag Gumby, good guy and I wish he'd get some luck and wish him all the best with the latest injury.
Gibbs is a super player though, will go on to become far better than Gumby and IMO better than anyone from his draft year by the end of his career.
Ben the Gooner
2 Aug 2010, 18:54
I won't bag Gumby, good guy and I wish he'd get some luck and wish him all the best with the latest injury.
Gibbs is a super player though, will go on to become far better than Gumby and IMO better than anyone from his draft year by the end of his career.
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_2UbyQb8LCFk/St9lSfwHlxI/AAAAAAAAA54/oPyCjL91p9w/s400/One+Single+Pea.jpg
the good thing about gibbs is that he manages to spew out 100 dt points for me every week despite having no influence on the game.
AxelFoley
2 Aug 2010, 18:59
Cant wait to see Hurls finally unleashed onto this insipid club...
Hurley will probably have a bad game.
He saves his best for the good teams.
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 21:02
Jetta > Betts.
Betts > Essendon
Which probably still makes sense to Jetta, he's always thought he was bigger than the club.
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 21:04
What's with the yellow avatars ladies?
Longy413
2 Aug 2010, 21:09
What's with the yellow avatars ladies?
Cancer awareness.
After realising Carlton are a lost cause, the lads decided to get behind a good one.
^ ROFL!!!
brilliant Longy
Lance Uppercut
2 Aug 2010, 21:14
zing!!
Ben the Gooner
2 Aug 2010, 21:15
^ ROFL!!!
brilliant Longy
Is the actual reason though.
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 21:23
Cancer awareness.
If that's it then very good of you :thumbsu:
After realising Carlton are a lost cause, the lads decided to get behind a good one.
I think we'd rather be 7th and playing finals than fallen to 12th ;)
AndyLesPaul
2 Aug 2010, 21:24
Well, anyone would rather be 7th than 12th.
Whats this about Carlton playing Finals? pretty sure we're more likely to play finals over Carlton, horrendous form slumps and all
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 21:35
Well, anyone would rather be 7th than 12th.
Whats this about Carlton playing Finals? pretty sure we're more likely to play finals over Carlton, horrendous form slumps and all
Pretty sure you were ready to sack the coach, the players and all the staff not that long ago after losing to the bottom placed team at home :o
Wouldn't knock our form.
Donakebab
2 Aug 2010, 21:36
I think we'd rather be 7th and playing finals than fallen to 12th ;)
http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g213/djXpression/almanacfront.jpg
Finals, no dice.
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 21:41
Finals, no dice.
We've both lost quality players, we've managed to improve the rest of the list enough to achieve the same result as last year, you guys have gone backwards at a rate of knots :thumbsu:
The Donners
2 Aug 2010, 21:41
Pretty sure you were ready to sack the coach, the players and all the staff not that long ago after losing to the bottom placed team at home :o
Wouldn't knock our form.
Yet we'll only be 1 game behind you after Friday night! :o
Longy413
2 Aug 2010, 21:52
We've both lost quality players, we've managed to improve the rest of the list enough to achieve the same result as last year, you guys have gone backwards at a rate of knots :thumbsu:
Actually, you need to win your last four games to have achieved the same result as last year.
Lose Friday night and you will have gone backwards.
With games against Geelong and Freo at Subi, I'm not sure how you can claim Carlton have achieved the same result as last year.
Donakebab
2 Aug 2010, 21:55
Longy is on fire!
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 22:00
Actually, you need to win your last four games to have achieved the same result as last year.
We'll get a chance to see how far we've come this year in the finals, which is what footy's all about. You guys will be thinking about how far backwards you've gone.
The Panther
2 Aug 2010, 22:07
Essendon by 39 + is the easiest money you'll make this year Johnny/Windyhill. Carlton are an absolute rabble.
knightmare123
2 Aug 2010, 22:18
neagle to kick a career best on jamiespud
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 22:23
neagle to kick a career best on jamiespud
Don't mention spuds around Neagle thanks, he'll try and eat poor Jamo :(
AndyLesPaul
2 Aug 2010, 22:26
Neagle only eats meat
but you're right, Jamison is a spud
Sin City
2 Aug 2010, 22:28
Neagle only eats meat
So long as it comes with three large pizzas, a big mac meal and 14 dim sims.
Should get him on the Houlihan/Walker/Betts routine.
What super, breakout, consistently awesome seasons they've all had.
We'll get a chance to see how far we've come this year in the finals, which is what footy's all about. You guys will be thinking about how far backwards you've gone.
Be lucky to make it...North and Melbourne will pass you and the Swans most likely.
Longy413
3 Aug 2010, 08:12
We'll get a chance to see how far we've come this year in the finals, which is what footy's all about. You guys will be thinking about how far backwards you've gone.
Not if you lose your last four you won't.
I'll take your inability to address my point as an admission and agreement that Carlton have in fact gone backwards in 2010.
Slattery_20
3 Aug 2010, 08:19
Not true Longy, took them til the 3/4 of the first final to choke last year, this year they've broken all barriers and choked 3/4 of the way through the home and away.
Sin City
3 Aug 2010, 09:23
Should get him on the Houlihan/Walker/Betts routine.
What super, breakout, consistently awesome seasons they've all had.
Well they're not Jetta, Myers and Prismall but at least they'll play finals this year :)
You guys need to stop hiding in here and come over and liven our banter thread up as well you pack of fairys.
Sin City
3 Aug 2010, 09:24
Be lucky to make it...North and Melbourne will pass you and the Swans most likely.
Keep dreaming, we have an easy run home against rabbles like Essendon and Richmond
Sin City
3 Aug 2010, 09:26
Not if you lose your last four you won't.
I'll take your inability to address my point as an admission and agreement that Carlton have in fact gone backwards in 2010.
Hardly going to lose our last four when we're against rabbles like Essendon and Richmond and our bitches Geelong
I'll take your inability to comprehend my post as addressing your desperate post as an admission you are another mentally challenged bummers lover.
Slattery_20
3 Aug 2010, 09:38
LOL Houlihan's still on a list?
Had a good giggle when Jordan Bannister finally got delisted last year, Houlihan's getting a run still? What about Wiggins? Bentick? Dylan Maclaren? A true galacticos, those spoon teams, I can understand why the Blues kept them around for so long.
Sin City
3 Aug 2010, 09:42
We cleared out Bentick and Maclaren, you guys have kept Dempsey, Atkinson, Myers, Jetta and who could forget..........LAYCOCK! :o:o:o
Ben the Gooner
3 Aug 2010, 09:44
Dennis Armfield still running around?
Slattery_20
3 Aug 2010, 09:46
At least Laycock was our overpaid injured spud.
Unlike you lot, who over-pay for other team's broken down hacks. And then hand them the captaincy.
Which excuse is the un-suspendable one going with this time? I saw him try and iron out that rippling beefcake Dayne Beaymes and lose last week, that was actually funnier than when he tried to iron out Lloyd and lost.
Well they're not Jetta, Myers and Prismall but at least they'll play finals this year :)I didn't think they'd brought in the mid-season draft yet?You guys need to stop hiding in here and come over and liven our banter thread up as well you pack of fairys.Would a fairy know that it's actually spelt "fairies"?
Wait.
Ben the Gooner
3 Aug 2010, 10:35
Well they're not Jetta, Myers and Prismall but at least they'll play finals this year :)
You guys need to stop hiding in here and come over and liven our banter thread up as well you pack of fairys.
I didn't realise the Bullants were finals chances.
Fair play to them.:thumbsu:
Keep dreaming, we have an easy run home against rabbles like Essendon and Richmond
Aaah the beauty of wishful thinking...Cousins, Deledio, Riewoldt and co will tear the Blues a new one and your club has no idea how to beat us.
Melbourne's draw by comparison is excellent...and Bailey is a a brilliant coach. Face it..it's over. Murphy and Gibbs couldn't score in a brothel.
KnaveyBlue
3 Aug 2010, 11:12
Blues to win by 5 goals simply because whichever team has form for our clashes invariably loses.
And Angus Wantfrees to win the 2010 Angus Wantfrees Medal for shameless diving in the spirit of Angus Wantfrees.
Please tell me Thornton's playing.
He's always good for at least 2 goals.
Not to mention how many his opponent kicks on him.
So many carlton spuds running around getting a regular game
Chris Johnson
Ellard
Fisher
O'hAilpin
Armfield
Joseph
Spud players combined with their tendency to squib every contest and a shit coach all amount to a 10 goal belting on Friday night.
Mr Mojo Risin
3 Aug 2010, 12:15
I hope Carlton scrape into the finals even after losing this Friday night as it means they will keep RatZero. :D
knightmare123
3 Aug 2010, 12:35
So many carlton spuds running around getting a regular game
Chris Johnson
Ellard
Fisher
O'hAilpin
Armfield
Joseph
Spud players combined with their tendency to squib every contest and a shit coach all amount to a 10 goal belting on Friday night.
You forgot to mention Walker, Houlihan and Jamieson
SurreyBlue
3 Aug 2010, 12:54
Just curious to understand why all the excitement?
Remind me again what the bummers have achieved this year so far?
Are in line for finals or even premiership in 2010?
I must have missed something ... surely!
DapperDon
3 Aug 2010, 13:00
We have achieved the same as Carlton, it's just that we aren't blinded by a shit ring in captain thinking he will be taking us to the top.
I hope Setanta plays, means we can use Fletcher as we please.
Beerfish
3 Aug 2010, 13:12
Look what Murphy found in his shorts after being told he had to play Essendon again this week.
http://mm.afl.com.au/Portals%5C0%5Ccarlton_images%5CGalleries%5Cmars-guernsey-gallery%5Cmars-murphy-450.jpg
The Donners
3 Aug 2010, 13:33
We cleared out Bentick and Maclaren, you guys have kept Dempsey, Atkinson, Myers, Jetta and who could forget..........LAYCOCK! :o:o:o
Warnock, McLean, Hadley, Fisher, Anderson, Robinson, Johnson AND Houlihan, these guys are complete rubbish.
The Donners
3 Aug 2010, 13:53
Just curious to understand why all the excitement?
Remind me again what the bummers have achieved this year so far?
Are in line for finals or even premiership in 2010?
I must have missed something ... surely!
In line for finals, they'll be taking Carlton's position in the "making up the numbers" category.
The Exorcist
3 Aug 2010, 13:56
Your players are very talented
Still don't understand how the Bombers get from a game to perform "Priscella - Queen of the Desert" at the theatre so quickly after a match?
LemmingMaster
3 Aug 2010, 14:13
I hope Carlton scrape into the finals even after losing this Friday night as it means they will keep RatZero. :D
Imagine if the Bombers win, then you may have to give Knights another 2 year contract extension.
Donakebab
3 Aug 2010, 14:20
Your players are very talented
Still don't understand how the Bombers get from a game to perform "Priscella - Queen of the Desert" at the theatre so quickly after a match?
I still don't understand how Blues fans get from the game to the corner of Victoria Pde and Hoddle St to 'clean' car windows so quickly after the match.
Valve Bounce
3 Aug 2010, 14:29
Stainless steel says hi! ;)
High voltage says "G'Day!" :eek:
Valve Bounce
3 Aug 2010, 14:31
I still don't understand how Blues fans get from the game to the corner of Victoria Pde and Hoddle St to 'clean' car windows so quickly after the match.
They leave at threequarter time to claim their spot at the intersection. :D
Mr Mojo Risin
3 Aug 2010, 14:38
Imagine if the Bombers win, then you may have to give Knights another 2 year contract extension.
At least he could continue to own Ratten. ;)
Slattery_20
3 Aug 2010, 14:39
They leave at threequarter time :D
They certainly do.
AndyLesPaul
3 Aug 2010, 14:50
At least he could continue to own Ratten. ;)
I Doubt it :P
Maybe SOS
Ben the Gooner
3 Aug 2010, 14:56
They certainly do.
And a pretty sight it is.