burgerfats
1 Nov 2003, 13:13
Hi all I have had countless PM's over the last few weeks so I decided that I might do my famous weekly column. I may aswell give you the good news that I am a QC now.
Dear Burgerfats,
I have always wanted to streak and I am having trouble trying to streak at club games, whether it be cricket or football. I would like to streak at one of my brother's games, but I don't know how to get the confidence. Can you please help me?
Hahaha, streaking is fun. I did a bit of that when I was young. Papa Burgerfats always hit me each time I did it so you can imagine how sore I was afterwards. Just close your eyes and imagine you're in a world with naked women. And that they are everywhere and just run like you were chasing after one of them.
Dear Burgerfats,
I always seem to poo my pants whilst playing football. I keep playing, but I stink. What can I do to counteract this problem?
P.S - If you don't answer my question, I won't send another one in.
Hmmm, that is a strange one. Go to the toilet before the game, go during half time, even if you can't, just go. It's best to let it all out. You could be nervous aswell so there are many factors which cause it. Don't eat fruit before the game, but rather have cereal without milk and have toast. That might help you.
Dear Burgerfats,
You might remember a question I asked about having some 'feelings' for someone on this board. I'm still scared. What do I do?
Tell me who they are and I'll speak to them for you. I'll send them a PM. If you're that scared, I'm happy to do it for you, but you must be prepared to live with the consequences if you get rejected.
Dear Burgerfats,
People have been ganging up on me and I don't know what to do.
When I was young, the same thing happened to me. I am now a QC and who were ganging up on me are now dole bludgers so you now know that who cares what they do because if you're more successful than them, that's all that matters. Ignore them. I don't condone violence. No no. That's wrong.
Dear Burgerfats,
What did you think of who we lost during trade period and who was cut off our list?
We got rid of Gram for pick 23 I think it was, so that was good.
We delisted Jarrad Wright, who is unlucky and promoted Joel MacDonald. So really I am quite happy with who was let go. We still have our core group together and that's all that counts.
Dear Burgerfats,
Who do you think we're going to pick up in the draft?
That's a good question. To be honest, I havn't had time to think about it, so I can't tell you.
Dear Burgerfats,
Do you think that we should freeze off number 10 next year?
Yes, I don't want anyone wearing Ashcroft's guernsey. He was an excellent player for the club and I would hate to see someone running around in number 10 next year. Number 10 needs to be worn by someone who will be at the club for a while. We can't use it next year. It will be wrong. We have other numbers we're not using.
Dear Burgerfats,
Should Michael Voss play up forward next year so we can nurse him through and play him in the middle for finals when it counts?
I'm not a big fan of that. If we make the finals next year and Voss hasn't played much in the midfield, there is probably no point playing Voss in the midfield, but rather leaving him in his position. Voss should play half a game in the middle and the rest in the forward pocket. He shouldn't play the majority up forward.
Dear Burgerfats,
I have always wanted to streak and I am having trouble trying to streak at club games, whether it be cricket or football. I would like to streak at one of my brother's games, but I don't know how to get the confidence. Can you please help me?
Hahaha, streaking is fun. I did a bit of that when I was young. Papa Burgerfats always hit me each time I did it so you can imagine how sore I was afterwards. Just close your eyes and imagine you're in a world with naked women. And that they are everywhere and just run like you were chasing after one of them.
Dear Burgerfats,
I always seem to poo my pants whilst playing football. I keep playing, but I stink. What can I do to counteract this problem?
P.S - If you don't answer my question, I won't send another one in.
Hmmm, that is a strange one. Go to the toilet before the game, go during half time, even if you can't, just go. It's best to let it all out. You could be nervous aswell so there are many factors which cause it. Don't eat fruit before the game, but rather have cereal without milk and have toast. That might help you.
Dear Burgerfats,
You might remember a question I asked about having some 'feelings' for someone on this board. I'm still scared. What do I do?
Tell me who they are and I'll speak to them for you. I'll send them a PM. If you're that scared, I'm happy to do it for you, but you must be prepared to live with the consequences if you get rejected.
Dear Burgerfats,
People have been ganging up on me and I don't know what to do.
When I was young, the same thing happened to me. I am now a QC and who were ganging up on me are now dole bludgers so you now know that who cares what they do because if you're more successful than them, that's all that matters. Ignore them. I don't condone violence. No no. That's wrong.
Dear Burgerfats,
What did you think of who we lost during trade period and who was cut off our list?
We got rid of Gram for pick 23 I think it was, so that was good.
We delisted Jarrad Wright, who is unlucky and promoted Joel MacDonald. So really I am quite happy with who was let go. We still have our core group together and that's all that counts.
Dear Burgerfats,
Who do you think we're going to pick up in the draft?
That's a good question. To be honest, I havn't had time to think about it, so I can't tell you.
Dear Burgerfats,
Do you think that we should freeze off number 10 next year?
Yes, I don't want anyone wearing Ashcroft's guernsey. He was an excellent player for the club and I would hate to see someone running around in number 10 next year. Number 10 needs to be worn by someone who will be at the club for a while. We can't use it next year. It will be wrong. We have other numbers we're not using.
Dear Burgerfats,
Should Michael Voss play up forward next year so we can nurse him through and play him in the middle for finals when it counts?
I'm not a big fan of that. If we make the finals next year and Voss hasn't played much in the midfield, there is probably no point playing Voss in the midfield, but rather leaving him in his position. Voss should play half a game in the middle and the rest in the forward pocket. He shouldn't play the majority up forward.