Health Your Lowest Point in Life

peejay said:

My old man used to beat the crap out of me - he was a heavy weight boxer - made the team for the comm games in the 50's. He was a prison officer in Jika jika at pentridge and was a tough mother.

he also had a booze problem.

Until i escaped at the age of 18 life was a constant battle for survival.

when my marriage ended in the late 90's i hit a low point - bottle of scotch a day and yearly topped myself.

when my mum died in 06 that was tough - saw her health plummet before my eyes.

My current partner got breast cancer a few years back - that is/was tough to deal with.

The constant in my life has been the tigers.

Without them i would not be here.

Simple as that.

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I'm glad I'm not alone in this re bolded bit. I thought I was the only one. It may sound trite but I find a good measure of peace/solace/contentment/happiness through footy, whether that's AFL or any other level: Dockers, love 'em! The game, love it!

As for the rest, peejay, i feel for you, mate!

Sebastian Balboa said:

I'm glad I'm not alone in this re bolded bit. I thought I was the only one. It may sound trite but I find a good measure of peace/solace/contentment/happiness through footy, whether that's AFL or any other level: Dockers, love 'em! The game, love it!

As for the rest, peejay, i feel for you, mate!

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Thanks mate but jeez there are millions worse off than me.

peejay said:

Thanks mate but jeez there are millions worse off than me.

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From this, I'm guessing your tribulations have made you strong/er? I definitely know mine have!

This is one bloody heavy thread. I can barely relate - the worst two things I've had happen are my mum getting breast cancer (luckily a bout of cancer that went away quickly, it was all gone after the surgery and round of chemo) and my two grandparents both passing away within a year. Still have my step-grandparent who's thankfully a great guy.

Lots of respect out to those who really opened up in this thread.

The "s**t happens" factor rises exponentially with age.

If I was sharing & caring in this thread it would be used as a source of amusement by those few loonies who frequent a nearly dead footy forum.

peejay said:

My old man used to beat the crap out of me - he was a heavy weight boxer - made the team for the comm games in the 50's. He was a prison officer in Jika jika at pentridge and was a tough mother.

he also had a booze problem.

Until i escaped at the age of 18 life was a constant battle for survival.

when my marriage ended in the late 90's i hit a low point - bottle of scotch a day and nearly topped myself.

when my mum died in 06 that was tough - saw her health plummet before my eyes.

My current partner got breast cancer a few years back - that is/was tough to deal with.

The constant in my life has been the tigers.

Without them i would not be here.

Simple as that.

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Worth bearing in mind when you consider how flippantly people call for clubs to merged and killed off etc.

There were periods in the 90s that weren't that crash hot for me (nothing like what people here - peejay being a good example - have gone through) largely due to the fact that I was giving the Persian rugs a fair old caning.

When I say I caning I don't mean big weekends, I mean proper unhealthy habitual use. Anyway, I wasn't in a good place, wasn't on good terms at all with the folks.

But every weekend we'd go to the footy and everything would be alright. We wouldn't go together, wouldn't even meet for a drink before - I'd just rock up to where we always stood - and afterwards usually in the MCG carpark, we'd go our sperate ways.

Yet while the footy was on, everything was forgotten and we could still share something we loved. (It was also probably re-assuring for them to see I was still alive).

If it wasn't for the footy, North more accurately, giving us something in common that we could hold onto no matter what, I don't know if our relationship - which is all good now - would have survived.

I can't quite pinpoint the lowest point in my life, possibly a year ago when there was a lot of stuff going on and I was going through a lonely period.

I've had a lot of bad stuff happen, my mum died of cancer almost on my 5th birthday (missed by 2 hours). Then my dad died of cancer when I was 18, he was my best friend in the world and the person I've loved like no one else ever. Then 5 months ago my brother died of cancer.

I'll never know what it's like to have a mother and I was left parent less barely having left childhood. That puts alot of pressure on mentally and financially.

Having said that I consider myself to be one of the luckiest people on the planet. I had to grow up fast but I took responsibility for my life am doing well financially and enjoy life. I sometimes find it hard to understand depression, I've lost a lot but I still have so much. I live a pretty stress free life, I don't get caught up in drama and I appreciate that I'm better off than 99% of people. I have food, a nice home and I don't have money stress. Life sucks sometimes but overall life is good.

I haven't really had depression but you do have those lonely periods- my constant is of course my religion Christianity, believing that no matter how bad it gets just keep the faith and love and through that heaven. Believing in a real unimaginably good place that is promised to come really does help

And also to a lesser degree sport does help. With about 4 teams (freo, Chicago cubs, chiefs and Oregon) there is sport all year around keeping my mind pretty occupied when I don't have much to think of.

nicky said:

What is persian rugs?

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Better to Urban Dictionary it...

lol, thanks grizzlym.

I wanted to know which variety.

Watched my best mate die when I was younger, girlfriend broke up with me 2 days later because she couldn't 'handle' me being upset. Then met another girl at his funeral. Were good friends for awhile before dating.

That ended when I discovered she'd hooked up with my dead mates older brother after we'd been together 18 months. She then got knocked up by him a week after we officially split.

Fun times.

Chicago Cubs! That's enough to do anyone's head in, oy vey!

In all seriousness, some pretty heavy but enlightening reading in this thread!

My wife has Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease type 2, it can be called peroneal muscular atrophy (muscle wastage). First diagnosed when she was 16.

It has been a struggle with many operations and long periods of inactivity.

She cannot climb stairs, she cannot walk any distance, her hand, arm shoulder & neck muscles are showing increased wastage now, causing problems sitting for any period of time.

Imagine going out, finding there are stairs at the location so turning around and going home. This has happened at numerous business functions that I have been invited to. Imagine not being able to go shopping because of the inability to walk any real distance and add her refusal to accept the need for a wheelchair because of stubbornness & pride.

The good still outweighs the bad by a considerable margin.

JPA_L 27 said:

Well what is it?

Personally, for me it would have be the time I rode off my Ford Fairlane on Christmas Eve. It felt so embarrassing have all the unnecessary attention it drew. What made it worse was that my Dad recently got the 4 year tank inspection done less than a week ago. I guess some of the most important lessons are the hardest learned

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When I was in year 12. I got with a girl who said told me she wasn't able to have kids. Turned out this was based on a feeling an that the other guys she had been with in the past hadn't got her pregnant. Not on a doctors advice as she had told me. She also didn't tell me until she was 3 months into the pregancy. I also had a big falling out with one of my best mates cos turns out he was seeing her just b4 me an I he thought I'd cheated with her on him. I knew they where close. She had told me they had one drunk night together an she had ended it.
I cancelled a course I had got into an paid for the next year an tried to find work to support us. I couldn't find any an there was no help like there is these days. I found a paper delivering job just get at least some money an got as many area's as I could. I wasn't sleeping from stress an was walking all day. One day I got home an realised I had left the wheely thing and my keys back about 20min walk in the wrong direction. My parents place was nearby so I went the an asked my mum if I could get a lift. But she had been drinking. She didn't really want to cas it was her first new car she had ever owned. It was only 14months old but I managed to convince her to let me borrow her car. Since it was dark was starting to rain an my girlfriend wanted me home. I drove there an got the bag. I remembered a shorter way to get back on a dirt road. The rain was really pouring down an I was on a dirt track. I had barely ever driven much on a proper road. There was no requirement back then of a certain amount of hours practice you had to do to get your licence.
I came round a an unexpected bend in the road. An there was a tree right in front of me. I swerved an slammed on the brakes. They locked up I clipped the side of the tree. Flipping the car.
Next thing I remember was me being sideways up an imbankment stuck in a fence an blood an glass where everywhere. It took me hours to get back as I was walking heavily concused with a lot of blood loss to in the dark an rain.
I felt pretty low at the point especiaclly since she was only concerned for me not the car. Sadly though this is lowest Point in Life in my life. Just pointing out things could be a lot worse.

Jakeeboy said:

Extremely good thread, gives you more than your fair share of perspective.

Four things jumped out to me though:

1. Divorce, for the love of God, marry the right people. Divorce is an overriding influence in these stories so for the sake of your family, friends parents, CHILDREN please do not rush into marriage. And ask your friends and family before doing it! There is a reason the divorce rate is about 50% in Australia. I know plenty of my friends have been in relationships where I knew it would not work, but they never asked anyone what they thought of this 'amazing' new girl they had just met. And then go onto to waste a year or two with someone who was never going to work.

2. Alcohol, it is beyond me why anyone drinks the stuff on a consistent rate, but alcohol does way more damage then it is worth and if you take a good look at this thread you would see this was true. I don't expect to win anyone over with this point but damn, drinking is a not a good thing and does more damage then it should.

3. Lack of asking for help, the best thing you can do when you are going through a tough time is to talk to a psychiatrist. It can make your burden much lighter if you share it with someone else. There is no real need to hold all your problems in. It will only do you harm, sometimes permanently.

4. Attempted suicide, firstly I can't get my head around how you fail to kill yourself. Secondly, suicide should not even be an option, life ALWAYS gets better. The stories in this thread are a testament to it, but that doesn't always mean where you are is the lowest you will go. If you commit suicide life for you and your relatives and friends will not get better, it will probably get much worse for the people close to you.

Hopefully someone reads this and gets something from it. Sorry for the long post though I thought something needed to be said

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What a trite, patronising and frankly, given the bravery of posters on this thread in talking about these traumatic times, offensive post.

Jakeeboy said:

1. Divorce, for the love of God, marry the right people. Divorce is an overriding influence in these stories so for the sake of your family, friends parents, CHILDREN please do not rush into marriage. And ask your friends and family before doing it! There is a reason the divorce rate is about 50% in Australia. I know plenty of my friends have been in relationships where I knew it would not work, but they never asked anyone what they thought of this 'amazing' new girl they had just met. And then go onto to waste a year or two with someone who was never going to work.

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How incredibly short sighted and plain naive. Ever considered that people change? That one partner in a marriage can be victim of cruel behaviour by their spouse that they could never have possibly predicted?

That marriages can be affected and deteriorate to the point of breakdown and divorce by events outside the control of either spouse?

Jakeeboy said:

Alcohol, it is beyond me why anyone drinks the stuff on a consistent rate, but alcohol does way more damage then it is worth and if you take a good look at this thread you would see this was true. I don't expect to win anyone over with this point but damn, drinking is a not a good thing and does more damage then it should.

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Good for you Mrs Lovejoy. You've never been tempted by the demon drink. We should all model ourselves on you. Alcohol is an addictive and dangerous substance as you say, but to blame people for problems they had with it, especially when they were young, is counter productive in the extreme.

Also worth noting many people here have been victims of alcoholic parents etc. I don't see how your prissy observation here relates to their situations.

Jakeeboy said:

3. Lack of asking for help, the best thing you can do when you are going through a tough time is to talk to a psychiatrist. It can make your burden much lighter if you share it with someone else. There is no real need to hold all your problems in. It will only do you harm, sometimes permanently.

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Oh FFS to the nth degree. So they people who talked about being abused as kids and the effect that had on them in the years that followed ... they should have just done the right and ASKED FOR HELP.

Again, so naive and verging on being offensive by presuming to know the burden people were and are carrying.

Jakeeboy said:

4. Attempted suicide, firstly I can't get my head around how you fail to kill yourself. Secondly, suicide should not even be an option, life ALWAYS gets better. The stories in this thread are a testament to it, but that doesn't always mean where you are is the lowest you will go. If you commit suicide life for you and your relatives and friends will not get better, it will probably get much worse for the people close to you.

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The mind boggles. It really does.

Jakeeboy said:

Extremely good thread, gives you more than your fair share of perspective.

Four things jumped out to me though:

1. Divorce
2. Alcohol

3. asking for help - this was the only useful point in your post but a psychiatrist isn't the only person you can seek help from. They are generally someone you are referred to for administering anti-depressants and prescribing of other neurological drugs. I think you meant psychologist.

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I understand you thought you may be helping with your post but there were so many points wrong with it I only quoted enough so you would know it was yours. I plead with you to delete this post as it is unhelpful and borderline destructive. Your lack of knowledge on the subject is plain to see and lacks any empathy or understanding.

People don't need to be told where they went wrong but be given tools and pathways out of their predicament. Understanding and empathy goes a long long way too.

DawOfPerception said:

What a trite, patronising and frankly, given the bravery of posters on this thread in talking about these traumatic times, offensive post.

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+1

JakeBoy your post has me raging right now, If you are trolling well done

Coming back to post that I currently feel ****ing amazing

For me the worst time in my life was around 2-3 years ago. I had made a lot of bad decisions in life, so I do take responsibility for where my life ended up. My biggest issue was my weight, which had spiraled to early heart attack type levels. At my most I would have been getting close to 200Kg. It is hard to feel happy in life at this weight.

At that same time I got into a job that I really wasn't cut out for and was making a lot of mistakes, which added to the poor opinion of myself that I already had. I didn't really have any friends either, I hated myself so much that I had basically isolated myself from people. The thought of having any sort of a relationship with anyone was pretty much unfathomable. Anyway, it all came to a head when I was driving to work one morning and felt like driving off the road and into a tree would be the easiest thing to do. That same day I finished that job and went to see my GP for the first time in years. I got put onto some anti depressants and saw counselors and stuff.

Since then i have lost a lot of weight and made a few friends and got back into study. I am a lot happier person now. I still have a long way to go, with the weight and with my life in general. I do feel like I reached my lowest ebb though.

I was sectioned under the Mental Health Act when I was younger... spent my 20th birthday in a secure psychiatric facility. Not an uncommon story I suspect - burnout, anxiety, depression and wound up suicidal. Someone spotted me and called the police.

Stuff like this thread is a great antidote to that pervading impression you always have that everyone else copes with life far better than you do. I wouldn't say I get pleasure out of reading stories like the ones here, but it's heartening to be reminded that everyone has periods just as tough as you (if not moreso) and most people eventually find a way to get through it.

Caesar said:

I was sectioned under the Mental Health Act when I was younger... spent my 20th birthday in a secure psychiatric facility. Not an uncommon story I suspect - burnout, anxiety, depression and wound up suicidal. Someone spotted me and called the police.

Stuff like this thread is a great antidote to that pervading impression you always have that everyone else copes with life far better than you do. I wouldn't say I get pleasure out of reading stories like the ones here, but it's heartening to be reminded that everyone has periods just as tough as you (if not moreso) and most people eventually find a way to get through it.

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I had two close friends who were sectioned - one I had do myself which wasn't a great thing - and one is fine now and the other sadly passed away nearly ten years ago after an OD. Thing is the bloke who ODd wasn't a junky or anything, he just stupidly decided he'd join some mates in extra partying after the Dees had won a final.

When he died he had an excellent job and a girlfriend and was quite happy. Tragedy.

Point is I think a lot of young men have mental health issues in their early 20s, especially those who push themselves too hard like it sounds you did.

As it happens my mate who died had his breakdown after trying to do a law/com joint degree while effectively working full time at nights.

Point is that as traumatic as it is at the time, it isn't the end of your life with a careful recovery surrounded by caring people.

What the hell, feeling melancholy

Several years back I had a heart attack, some of the old Bigfootyites would know this.

Been going okay for quite a while until November when I was put into hospital for a little while with congestive heart failure.

Recovered but found out early this month that one of the medications I had been taking, Amiodarone, had played holy hell with my thyroid causing Amiodarone-induced hyperthyroidism which the medication will either control, or if it doesn't they will have to remove my thyroid. Then just before Christmas they told me my coronary artery disease has worsened along with my atrial fibrillation which was the reason I was taking the Amiodarone in the first place.

Some s**t gotta happen sometime I suppose, my Dad died due to his 3rd heart attack when he was 47 years old, so I've beaten him ...

Caesar said:

I was sectioned under the Mental Health Act when I was younger... spent my 20th birthday in a secure psychiatric facility. Not an uncommon story I suspect - burnout, anxiety, depression and wound up suicidal. Someone spotted me and called the police.

Stuff like this thread is a great antidote to that pervading impression you always have that everyone else copes with life far better than you do. I wouldn't say I get pleasure out of reading stories like the ones here, but it's heartening to be reminded that everyone has periods just as tough as you (if not moreso) and most people eventually find a way to get through it.

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Yes, this is really a great thread for that reason.

Caesar, kudos for sharing

I refuse to let the human condition beat me even when it beats me.