Awkward/embarrassing stories

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Was swimming at the Aquatic Centre with a friend. Had old bathers on and a boob popped out. I didn't realise until he said "honey your tit is floating on the water." He was gay so didn't give a s**t but there is no coming back from that. I didn't look around to see who might have seen.
 
Not sure where to put this given recent GD disucssion, but not embarrassing for me just something I remember seeing.

When I was about 10 we went on a holiday with some family friends, who in turn invited another set of their own family friends. The mum of this second family who I had never seen before, was only about young 30's and also a model doing some TV commercials and magazine ads. Pretty much the hottest female young frantelle had seen to that point. In order to maximise my very subtle perve I had my goggles on nice and tight and would just sit at the bottom of the pool holding my breathe, a pretty simple game that many children play but I was just being a perve. That was going swimmingly well until she began frantically rushing to the other end of the pool as if a great white had been dropped in behind her. As she got to the other end, she pulled out a chocolate hotdog from the water, turns out her 3yr old kid had just done a crap in the pool. Having just seen her rocking body standing there holding a turd, my interest in my game was over
 

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When I was in year 6 I was Green House Captain. We had this sort of house spirit competition at the sports carnival where you had to march around the oval, then do a bunch of chants. Naturally, being captain I was required to lead the chants on the megaphone.

There is nothing more embarrassing than leading the "Give me a (letter)" chant, getting to the end, asking "What does it spell?" and having 100 kids gleefully yell "GEEN!".

Had to surrender the megaphone to the girls captain, I was so embarrassed.
 
Just yesterday, I went to Funfields (amusement park in VIC) with my niece. There was a scary arse ride there... a pirate ship type thing, pretty much a gigantic, operated swing. Having been on some of Australia's scariest rollercoasters, I thought I was big and tough enough for this ride. That is, until I got there. As soon as I laid eyes on it, my stomach churned and a few seconds later I was standing in a pool of my own sweat and regret.

Soon enough, we reached the front of the line, already having half shat ourselves. We got into the middle seats, thinking that it would be less daunting than those at the ends. You wouldn't believe my face when a group of hot lifeguards slipped into the seats across from us, (directly facing us). All greens on the Beautiful People scale.

As soon as the ride started, I felt like screaming like a mad man, but I decided against making too much noise to avoid looking like an idiot in front of the sexy lifeguards. Instead? I closed my eyes the whole ride, my head in the clouds, and didn't even squeak. I had a little peaceful smile on my face and breathed really softly as the hundred odd people around me screwed up my hearing. All of a sudden, I heard hysterical laughing. I opened my eyes for a split second to see that the lifeguards had found amusement in my Buddha impersonation. I distinctly heard one of the little bitches say "Is she meditating?", followed by echoes of laughter from his stupid lifeguard mates. I gave them a death glare hiding once the ride had finished, as they hurried their firm, tanned arses quickly down the stairs.

Moral of the story: don't bother trying to impress certain people. They'll poke fun at you anyway :p
 
Caesar said:
When I was in year 6 I was Green House Captain. We had this sort of house spirit competition at the sports carnival where you had to march around the oval, then do a bunch of chants. Naturally, being captain I was required to lead the chants on the megaphone.

There is nothing more embarrassing than leading the "Give me a (letter)" chant, getting to the end, asking "What does it spell?" and having 100 kids gleefully yell "GEEN!".

Had to surrender the megaphone to the girls captain, I was so embarrassed.
Click to expand...

Hahaha, stoopid.
 
Caesar said:
When I was in year 6 I was Green House Captain. We had this sort of house spirit competition at the sports carnival where you had to march around the oval, then do a bunch of chants. Naturally, being captain I was required to lead the chants on the megaphone.

There is nothing more embarrassing than leading the "Give me a (letter)" chant, getting to the end, asking "What does it spell?" and having 100 kids gleefully yell "GEEN!".

Had to surrender the megaphone to the girls captain, I was so embarrassed.
Click to expand...
Leaders gotta learn somehow, being awesome aint it.
 
Participated in a cross country run in primary school, the course was part ash-vault/road, uneven ground, more grass, more ash-vault, finishing with a lap on an oval. I kept pace with other entrants in my school while we were competing against other schools, started to lose pace 1/4 of the way into it. Completely lost pace after i had tripped over and rolled my ankle on the section with an uneven mound of dirt. I could only walk the rest of the course, no teachers or adults were nearby, so i couldn't alert anyone to say that i was done. Got a rowdy/humiliating reception by those awaiting me at the finish line. And to top it off, my school 's bus was on the verge of driving off without me. If it wasn't for one of the teacher's having a final look around, i would have been left behind.


Second rolling of the ankle story, playing school zone football... i stepped in an uneven part of the oval as i was running with the ball. Went down like a sack of.... in front of everyone and cried out in pain. Everyone was wondering why i made such a fuss, but i swear it hurt like hell. Funny thing was that in the times after that, i would cop several knocks to the face (including getting kneed on the eyebrow area) and didn't cry about it.
 
I was about nine or ten, it was the day of the school athletics carnival and I woke up the day of the event with some sort of stomach bug. Naturally, I told my mum I didn't want to go because I was sick. Unfortunately she didn't believe me - probably thought I was trying to get a day off school.

The day progresses slowly, but I was clenching my cheeks at the right time so I start to believe I'll make it through. The second last event for the day is the 200m sprint and as we're taking our marks I can feel my stomach churning. I try to ignore it in the hope that I can make it through but as the race begins and I immediately regret taking part.

I was reasonably placed going around the turn, at which point I feel that familiar burning sensation in my throat that can only be associated with vomiting. I slow down a little to let everyone go past before sprinting off the track to the public restrooms, where I proceeded to throw up all over the nearest toilet. I spent at least fifteen minutes in there cleaning up before doing the walk of shame back to the track. I still felt like crap when it came to the last event. Luckily the teacher in charge felt I'd suffered enough and let me sit it out.
 
Tonight, going for a late night walk around my neighbourhood as I often do (around 11:30), I experienced a bit of awkwardness.
Since no one is ever around, I was just walking along sort of silently singing while I listened to my ipod. So as i'm doing my silent singing, I look up and see a pretty hot girl around my age looking at me, and she began to giggle.

Was pretty shattered.
 
Igloo said:
Tonight, going for a late night walk around my neighbourhood as I often do (around 11:30), I experienced a bit of awkwardness.
Since no one is ever around, I was just walking along sort of silently singing while I listened to my ipod. So as i'm doing my silent singing, I look up and see a pretty hot girl around my age looking at me, and she began to giggle.

Was pretty shattered.
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Reminds me of a story of my mine
I would have been around 16 and I was walking home from school. I had my earphones in and I was listenign to music on my phone. I had some pretty embarassing songs(some of which I'm sure i have posted in the appropriate thread) and i wasnt singing aloud but i was probably moving my mouth and nodding or something like that
i was getting weird looks on the way home as i went past bus stops and what not although at the time i thought nothing of it. when i got home i thought to myself that the music didnt seem very good quality and i couldnt get the volume up very high. what happened was that i hadnt put the earphones in the whole way and the phone was just playing the music through the speaker or whatever.
so here i am, the dickhead who has his earphones in while the music was plaing out loud. some pretty girly songs as well i reckon haha.
 
I was 13, I was in a public toilet. I did properly not lock the door. A mother, with her two young daughters in-hand, walked in on me defecating.

"Occupied!", I cried too late... it's occupied... :(
 
Caesar said:
There is nothing more embarrassing than leading the "Give me a (letter)" chant, getting to the end, asking "What does it spell?" and having 100 kids gleefully yell "GEEN!".

Had to surrender the megaphone to the girls captain, I was so embarrassed.
Click to expand...

You should have yelled 'Gimme a C, gimme a U, gimme an N...' and then finished on the T break just to see what would happen. Would the other kids, enthralled by your voice and performance, blindly follow?
 

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I was boarding the Spirit of Tasmania at Devonport to head back at home. I am at the ticket counter and the girl on the desk hands me my pass and says "Have a great trip". My response "Thanks, you too"

I think i'd sped off before i could see her reaction. Although something tells me it wouldn't have been the first time she's heard it.
 
Farted at work yesterday while serving a polite elderly couple in the nursery. I've 3 tins of baked beans in the last 3 days so this was the worst smelling fart in the history of humankind.

It's also not the first time I've done a horrible fart at the most inappropiate of times.
 
Was giving my mate a dink on my mongoose and saw these girls from another school that were hot so decided to jump off a gutter and show off.

We ended up on our backs on the road bleeding. The girls laughed then came over. Best pickup ever.
 
ioppolo said:
Farted at work yesterday while serving a polite elderly couple in the nursery. I've 3 tins of baked beans in the last 3 days so this was the worst smelling fart in the history of humankind.

It's also not the first time I've done a horrible fart at the most inappropiate of times.
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Maaan, that reminds me. I once cleared out a concert.

I went to this youth group experience thing for a while in high school, it was pretty relaxed for your typical worship group.

So we're at the front of the moshpit jumping around to some amateur Christian rock band, everyone's sweaty, the room's hot and there are bright fluoro lights burning into our skulls. I had just had a hotdog and stacked it with tomato sauce, and the jumping and sweating was really getting to me. I stopped jumping, clutched my stomach, crawled onto the stage with my head on the floor and arse in the air and proceeded to let off a ripper cropdust onto all the people behind me. Fair to say they cleared the place out quicker than Jars could clean out a 6 pack of donuts
 
I'm not sure what's more embarrassing. Clearing out a concert or being at a Christian rock concert in the first place.
 
This isn't mine but one of my mates. Thought it was pretty funny.

He works at the SCG as a groundsman and he see's professional sportspeople on a regular basis, so one day during the test series against the South Africans he see's Dale Steyn (whom he's a huge fan of), so naturally starstruck he goes up to have a conversation with him. The conversation goes like this:
"Hi Dale"
"Hey mate"
"Do you by any chance speak Afrikaner?"
"aaahh......yeh":confused:
Needless to say Dale just walked off pretty quick leaving my mate in an embarrassed state.

When he told us at a bbq a few days later we never let him forget it and don't think we will for a while yet.
 
I have a couple that I have had over the past month or so.
First one, is, I was at a shopping centre with a couple of mates, and I saw a girl that we knew from school, who had pretty much offered to be my ****Buddy. This, I did not want. But, as I was noticing that she was there, she also looked over, and we made eye contact. I was like "Awww sh**" and just as she comes over my mate was like, "Don't make eye contact, she'll think you want to have sex with her". I assume that she heard. We all made pleasantries, and as we walked off, I realise the awkwardness that may ensue in the future.
Similar to Igloo, I will commonly head on evening walks, around 9ish. Two weeks in a row I walked past 2 girls who live down my street, that I have never spoken to. The second time, I was listening to some girly music, and loudly, with no one usually around. As we walked by, we also did the 'Both step one way, and step the other' while trying to avoid the other. She gave me a nice little smile, but I'm sure she thought i was a flog as well.
 
porksy said:
Maaan, that reminds me. I once cleared out a concert.

I went to this youth group experience thing for a while in high school, it was pretty relaxed for your typical worship group.

So we're at the front of the moshpit jumping around to some amateur Christian rock band, everyone's sweaty, the room's hot and there are bright fluoro lights burning into our skulls. I had just had a hotdog and stacked it with tomato sauce, and the jumping and sweating was really getting to me. I stopped jumping, clutched my stomach, crawled onto the stage with my head on the floor and arse in the air and proceeded to let off a ripper cropdust onto all the people behind me. Fair to say they cleared the place out quicker than Jars could clean out a 6 pack of donuts
Click to expand...
Did they know it was you?

I have a petite pretty blond girlfriend and she used to brag about doing them in elevators packed full of men. And the men would all glare at each other in wonderment of who had done it. She was never suspected.
 
A "mate of a mate" of mine had a very prim-and-proper mother (she was from Camberwell or somewhere), who apparently really liked old-school gothic horror movies like Dracula, Frankenstien, etc...

Anyway, God knows how this happened, but this guy had somehow got the idea that the film "Scary Movie" was a serious old-school horror movie, and brought his mother to come and see it...

A young bloke, with his prim and proper mother, watching "Scary Movie" expecting it to be Dracula 2........there was apparently lots of embarassed squirming in seats for the next 90 minutes. From all accounts, it was the longest and most awkward few hours of that guys' life!
 
I was 16 and banging my high school girlfriend in my bedroom after school one arvo. The old girl was at the shops so I thought we'd have time to get a quicky in...

All of a sudden I heard my mother open the front door to the house (she must have ninja-d the car into the driveway). I quickened my pace, finished up and pulled my clothes on- leaving the condom on my dick. My thought process at the time was "I'll just act like everything is normal for a little while and dispose of it later".

Later that night (approx. 2 hours later) and after my girlfriend had gone home, I walked into the kitchen to see my mother holding up a used, floppy, load-filled condom in her hands- her expression one of shock and disgust. Her only words: "What is this?!?"
Me: "Arrrgghhh... Arrrggh... We were given them at school today and I was just playing around with it".

Turns out that I forgot that I had left the condom attached, and it had fallen off in the kitchen of all places. My own mum was holding a floppy used condom- full of my sperm (the outside coated with my girlfriend) in her bare hands.

Never felt more embarrassed and awkward in my life. I still haven't quite come to terms with it... Thank god it has never been brought up.
 
Yellow Feathers said:
I was 16 and banging my high school girlfriend in my bedroom after school one arvo. The old girl was at the shops so I thought we'd have time to get a quicky in...

All of a sudden I heard my mother open the front door to the house (she must have ninja-d the car into the driveway). I quickened my pace, finished up and pulled my clothes on- leaving the condom on my dick. My thought process at the time was "I'll just act like everything is normal for a little while and dispose of it later".

Later that night (approx. 2 hours later) and after my girlfriend had gone home, I walked into the kitchen to see my mother holding up a used, floppy, load-filled condom in her hands- her expression one of shock and disgust. Her only words: "What is this?!?"
Me: "Arrrgghhh... Arrrggh... We were given them at school today and I was just playing around with it".

Turns out that I forgot that I had left the condom attached, and it had fallen off in the kitchen of all places. My own mum was holding a floppy used condom- full of my sperm (the outside coated with my girlfriend) in her bare hands.

Never felt more embarrassed and awkward in my life. I still haven't quite come to terms with it... Thank god it had never been bought up.
Click to expand...
I cringed reading this, this is a whole new level of awkward.
 
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