Children Discipline

[Quivorir]

Thanks for that

Apologies for not being able to read sarcasm.

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

As far as I'm concerned it's just as lazy to hit your kid as it is to do nothing. Hitting a kid is the easy way out, it takes very little thought or effort and it teaches them nothing. How about actually talking to your child or putting some effort in when disciplining them.

What about a bloody good belting followed by a talking to?

 

[Catfish Alley]

I answered no because you asked if they deserve a good hiding. I agree with the very first reply.

That said, I don't think it's for me. Haven't done it yet and have found other methods work.

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

I used to get 'knocked around' a fair bit. None of this bloody mambi pambi pussyfooting around like we see today.

 

[kfc1]

I used to get 'knocked around' a fair bit. None of this bloody mambi pambi pussyfooting around like we see today.

You post like you're a 14 year old with ADHD, not sure it worked that well

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

You post like you're a 14 year old with ADHD, not sure it worked that well

If I didn't have that kind of discipline, I probably would have grown up to be a loud mouthed, obnoxious Essendon supporter.

 

[Contra Mundum]

If you want to teach kids that violence isn't the answer, I'm not sure giving them a whack when you get angry is the way to go. Seems a little self defeating to me.

If your going to to do it it has to be done clinically - often the smacking is a function of the parent's anger than the kids misdeeds. I don't have the self discipline to be cool so I don't do it

 

[Gough]

If your going to to do it it has to be done clinically - often the smacking is a function of the parent's anger than the kids misdeeds. I don't have the self discipline to be cool so I don't do it

I don't have kids so it's easy to be a backseat parent It's interesting that you mention the parent's anger though, a lot of times I've seen parents give their kids a smack, it's seemed to me that that's the reason they are doing it, which I is why I think it's a bit counter productive.

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

When I pissed the bed when I was a kid, the old man rubbed me nose in it.

 

[Contra Mundum]

I don't have kids so it's easy to be a backseat parent It's interesting that you mention the parent's anger though, a lot of times I've seen parents give their kids a smack, it's seemed to me that that's the reason they are doing it, which I is why I think it's a bit counter productive.

I can't do it - I lose my temper. We all know the most scary adults are not those that rant and rave and scream all the time its the softly spoken ones that freak you out.

 

[BALKAN]

The best way is to buy them an animal that they love and then hit the animal when the kid misbehaves. Make them watch every beating and keep screaming "YOU CAUSED THIS! YOU CAUSED THIS!" at them.

 

[Doss]

'Belting' and 'walloping' carries an implication of violence and rage with it. Smacking not so much.

I believe they should be used very sparingly, and as others have noted, not as an anger release for the parents.

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

The best way is to buy them an animal that they love and then hit the animal when the kid misbehaves. Make them watch every beating and keep screaming "YOU CAUSED THIS! YOU CAUSED THIS!" at them.

 

[Run n Spread]

Children are more perceptive then given credit for. If you go to their level and explain why things are in place/rules are needed/ a situation occurs they are receptive. Like most people yelling and carrying on like a fuc$#wit will have 0 effect on behaviour.

The smacking thing. I don't know. Can't think of any instances where it would be needed. Now while taking the belt/strap to a child is assault imo most times I have witnessed a smack it has been done as an immediate correction to demonstrate the seriousness and has been no more force than a footy player tap on the bum. Hardly a smack more the child equivalent of restraining someone. Maybe in certain circumstances that may work but more force is assault imo.

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

Beltings at my joint used to involve roaring, swearing, and hard hits. No mercy.

 

[Gough]

My father is a pacifist, my mother, an apathist, neither laid a finger on me.

 

[Taylor]

As I have grown older I have noticed two things among many, but two relevant things here.

1 - That children copy the behavior of their parents. Children who get yelled at for compliance yell at other children for compliance.

2 - Violence is what stupid people do when they are at the end of their ability to back up their argument with reason or have run out of patience with the situation. Either way it is the flaw of the person administering the violence.

The result? Children are not in possession of either patience or the ability to communicate reasoning so teaching violent behavior is like giving a match to scarecrows.

Dr Taylor. AWsM SxY

 

[alexkidd16]

Teenage discipline is where the problem is at

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

Once the old man went troppo at me and my brother when we were kids(can't remember what we did but it was something), we were both given a walloping then after it he called us both weak as piss.

 

[BALKAN]

IschenkoUBeauty your posts are making me depressed

 

[IschenkoUBeauty]

IschenkoUBeauty your posts are making me depressed

If you think that's bad, Waite until North play the Blues this year. Then you'll be depressed!

 

[Borry]

When I pissed the bed when I was a kid, the old man rubbed me nose in it.

When my brother shat on the carpet my dad got out two slices of bread and warned him of the implications of it happened again.

 

[Gough]

Teenage discipline is where the problem is at

It's always the youth of today, when the youth of today grow up, they'll complain about the youth of the day. It's cyclical, boring and unimaginative.

 

[Taylor]

Teenage discipline is where the problem is at

What about that study that said if you give me the child until 7, I will give you the man?

 

[PaddyO]

Smacking kids is fine. Always has been. The Helen Lovejoys can GTFO.

Hitting kids is not fine. Never has been. The 'I'm just toughening him up' types can also GTFO.

Kids are basically just pets that live longer, learn to talk and eventually put you in a home. If you smack a puppy on the nose lightly with a rolled up newspaper or spray it with a water bottle when it does something wrong, it will learn that whatever it was doing is not on. When it stops doing whatever it was that it was doing, you give it a pat and a biscuit and it thinks you are the best thing ever. You scream at a puppy and belt it over the ears it will become timid and nervous and will probably end up biting a stranger who laughs loudly or moves their hands too quickly.

Kids are no different. A smack on the bum and a 'You know why you got that?' 'Yeeesssss, Daaaadddd' 'OK, good lad now run along and don't do it again' is a perfectly acceptable behaviour modification tool. Just like removing XBOX360 or iPad privileges for not doing homework, not allowing sweets if vegetables aren't eaten at dinner, offering a trip to McDonald's or the zoo or wherever kids go for doing well at school etc.

Respectfully disagree. I've never smacked/hit my kids and I never will. Both are now older now (upper primary), neither misbehave, both respect others and are compassionate people.

It's not a "perfectly acceptable behaviour modification tool". Which is why it's controversial. What is proven to be far more effective is age appropriate relevant consequences. Let's say the issue is a kid running on the road.

At age 2, developmentally the child doesn't understand the danger. So the parent's job is to simply protect the kid. If the kid tries, the parent redirects and says "no".

At age 5, the child can probably understand the danger to an extent. So the parent says "don't run on the road, it's dangerous". A relevant consequence if the child runs deliberately toward the road is the parent says "ok, that's not safe, you need to go inside until you can learn...". The consequence is relevant because the child loses outside playing because they did the wrong thing. Reinforce it next time, and follow the same action.

All smacking teaches kids (from the parents I've seen whacking their kids in Target) is that if I'm frustrated with someone, it's ok to hit them.