Fantastically scathing article about Channel Nine

PrideOf

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Funny thing about Brad McNamara is that he was a member of '6 and Out'. We use the band's song as the intro music to my cricket podcast 'Can't Bowl Can't Throw'.

Heard that song for the first time the other day. It sounded like a Wiggles cover band impersonating the Wiggles trying to sing a song about cricket written by a bunch of Grade 5s. Embarrassing.
 
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PrideOf

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You'd hope the reception the commentary piece received would mean Nine makes some changes but they aren't doing another game until November so they'll probably hope everyone's forgotten.

Yeah, nah. You don't know Network TV. Any criticism is obviously based on the critic's jealousy, mental deficiency, bad judgement or links with the opposition. See also: Sam Newman or David Koch.

They'll be listening about as much as the Australian selectors were when Mr McNamara was trundling around for NSW asking if he could have a baggy green. Not at all.
 
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Zarrix

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The situation regarding commentary will only get worse if we continue to source our commentators from retired players. This was excellent back in the day, most sportspeople were larger than life characters with indefinite stories to engage the viewer and natural idiosyncrasies that made their calls highly exuberant. They were putting themselves on the line, they were real people. Above all, they could actually commentate as well (However, I do think there is some commentating ability in the current bunch, as their exerts away from the commentating crematorium of channel nine show)

Nowadays, the average sportsmen lacks any real public character, concealing themselves in a veil of political correctness, media training and corporate imagery. The result is either a cardboard, underwhelming commentary style that adds little, or contrived emotion or atmosphere instructed from above. The state of commentary boxes in Australia is just a microcosm of the desperately dreary zeitgeist.
 
I think the opposite is true. The fact that the current commentary team are such ludicrous, terrible, over-the-top caricatures makes it a lot more difficult for Billy to do his 12th Man stuff. How can you parody what already appears to be a parody or a real commentary team?

It reminds me of a comedian (can't remember who, might have been Tony Martin) talking about political satire. His point was people like Bush Jr and Bjelke-Petersen were so insane and what these guys were doing and saying was already so hilarious/stupid that the jokes wrote themselves and in most cases were too obvious to bother doing, so there was not really any work to be done by comedians. He was lamenting the loss of Howard who, while still ripe for parody, was actually smart/competent enough to make comedians work for their jokes.

Richie, Bill, Tony, Ian, etc. were great at their jobs but had enough humorous characteristics and trademarks that Billy could exaggerate for his albums.

How can you possibly parody Slater, Healy, Brayshaw and Warne? Sorry... I mean Slats, Heals, JB and Warnie.
It's an interesting one. I do agree with your opening paragraph and have been thinking that myself for some time.

But....

I still think it is possible to take the piss out of the C9 commentary team. They are not so absurd that they can't be taken to far more absurd levels.

We should start a BigFooty working party/think tank to rough out various ideas and scenarios and send them to Mr B. :)
 
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It's an interesting one. I do agree with your opening paragraph and have been thinking that myself for some time.

But....

I still think it is possible to take the piss out of the C9 commentary team. They are not so absurd that they can't be taken to far more absurd levels.
I think the problem is that, even allowing for comic exaggeration, they're all essentially the same character.
 

STFU Donnie

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It's an interesting one. I do agree with your opening paragraph and have been thinking that myself for some time.

But....

I still think it is possible to take the piss out of the C9 commentary team. They are not so absurd that they can't be taken to far more absurd levels.

We should start a BigFooty working party/think tank to rough out various ideas and scenarios and send them to Mr B. :)

The problem is they have gone so far the other way that a parody of the Ch9 shower would sound pretty much like Jim Maxwell or Tim Lane.
 
I've actually found how Brad McNamara plans to improve the commentary.

"1. The commentators should be louder, angrier and have access to a time machine
2. When the commentators aren't talking, viewers should be asking, where are the commentators?"
 
Nowadays, the average sportsmen lacks any real public character, concealing themselves in a veil of political correctness, media training and corporate imagery. The result is either a cardboard, underwhelming commentary style that adds little, or contrived emotion or atmosphere instructed from above. The state of commentary boxes in Australia is just a microcosm of the desperately dreary zeitgeist.

clarke will fit in
 

Zarrix

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It's TV. We don't need to be told what is happening.

Seems to be a problem with Australian commentating in general. The program producers seem to think we are blind. I hate most afl commentary for the same reason. We dont need to be told if lance franklin has marked 50 metres out or if mitchell johnson has knocked over james anderson.
 

PrideOf

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Seems to be a problem with Australian commentating in general. The program producers seem to think we are blind. I hate most afl commentary for the same reason. We dont need to be told if lance franklin has marked 50 metres out or if mitchell johnson has knocked over james anderson.

The major problem is that the producers also seem to think we are BORED. They seem to think that we're watching the cricket, but need to be entertained as well. Then they guess what entertaining means and they get it very, very wrong.

That's how we end up with Brayshaw speaking in emojis at the cricket or Slats fellating Davey Warner or Warnie talking about pizzas and Tinder.

And that's also how we end up with Derwayne screaming about chaos balls and firestarters and BT speaking in a language other than English with his wowees and other such verbal diarrhea.

Dear producers, we don't need to be entertained. We ARE entertained by the sport we are watching. That's kinda why we watch it.
 

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Is the ABC grandstand in sync with the cricket telecast, that may be the solution for me.

Im tired of the garbage I am hearing. i thought I was alone. I guess its to appeal to the Big Brother/MKR bogan audience.

ABC coverage is 1-2 seconds ahead. Perfect. You can listen while doing something else, and look up when something occurs. Or just watch chWaste of time (9 sorry), and listen to the far more impressive ABC coverage.

and just because
Brad McNamara
 

arzach

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...

Dear producers, we don't need to be entertained. We ARE entertained by the sport we are watching. That's kinda why we watch it.

Absolutely this.

Some years back, I was watching an AFL pre-season game where they must have had the work experience kid running the sound. The commentary feed dropped out for about 10 minutes and it was just the ground effects and umpire mics at louder than normal volume. Was fantastic just having the ebb and flow of crowd noise and on-field sounds. Was very immersive, a lot like being at the ground. Hell, it was like being on the ground. I remember thinking at the time that if there was an option to select this as the audio option on the broadcast, I'd pick it every time.

Would be great for cricket too - just crack the stump mics and crowd noise with no commentary. Would sound like you were standing in the slip cordon. I guess you could fade the stump mic in and out between balls to make it more PG, but an uncensored feed would be awesome :). Even in previous years where the commentary was more bearable, after 25 years of watching and playing cricket, I didn't really need to hear Tony Greig explaining what an in-swinger is.
 

STFU Donnie

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The second problem with parodying the Nine team, other than trying to do a parody of a parody, is that Brad MacNamara would sue.

Waste of money! It's well established in law that a genuine parody is protected. A parody is, after all, no more than a verbal caricature.
 
one eyed supporters of afl argue that a lot is going on in footy so you need second by second commentary. with the internet at hand you dont need this.

i feel that the main reason for the verbal diarrhea on our networks is due to fact that there are so many ex players/coaches who need work. easiest thing to do is media. there are so many people working in sports media it becomes a massive comp. fight for airtime, and maintain.
 
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Would be great for cricket too - just crack the stump mics and crowd noise with no commentary.

Few years back foxtel offered that during the english home summer, you could press the red button and then mute the comms and just keep the full crowd noise and stump noise.

Was the most enjoyable experience but no way the egotistical arses at 9 would ever allow an option to mute their crap, biggest worry for them with that option would be the inability to force us to listen to ads for their rubbish reality shows.

They simply think we are tuning in to watch channel 9 who just happen to have cricket on rather than being forced to watch nine only because they have the cricket on and i can't see them ever changing that attitude.
 
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Hell no
Few years back foxtel offered that during the english home summer, you could press the red button and then mute the comms and just keep the full crowd noise and stump noise.

Was the most enjoyable experience but no way the egotistical arses at 9 would ever allow an option to mute their crap, biggest worry for them with that option would be the inability to force us to listen to ads for their rubbish reality shows.

They simply think we are tuning in to watch channel 9 who just happen to have cricket on rather than being forced to watch nine only because they have the cricket on and i can't see them ever changing that attitude.
Frank rizzo?
R I z z o ?

Jerky?
 
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