Funny sayings!

[Herne Hill Hammer]

Two that I've have heard to describe an exceptional looking woman.

I'd use her shite for toothpaste.

I'd swim through 20 feet of shite with my mouth open just to suck the **** of the last man that ******* her.

 

[Rod Stroker]

well well well. 3 holes in the ground

 

[RedmanWasHere]

well well well. 3 holes in the ground

My family also say that.

A great phrase it is.

 

[entourage]

Two that I've have heard to describe an exceptional looking woman.

I'd use her shite for toothpaste.

I'd swim through 20 feet of shite with my mouth open just to suck the **** of the last man that ******* her.

Genuinely disgusting

 

[benneth]

There's no i in team, but there's a u in Kent

 

[Double the Fist]

Join the Navy. Never leave your mates behind!

 

[snax]

A bloke i used to work with was not the brightest, but a great bloke, his nickname was Milo...

in to my second year of my apprenticeship i asked my boss 'why was his nickname Milo'?

With a quick reply he said "Well he's not f***n Quik is he!"

 

[Double the Fist]

A bloke i used to work with was not the brightest, but a great bloke, his nickname was Milo...

in to my second year of my apprenticeship i asked my boss 'why was his nickname Milo'?

With a quick reply he said "Well he's not f***n Quik is he!"

Took me nearly 5 minutes to figure it out....

 

[cheesedogg]

Well this board is 'flat out like a lizard drinking'

 

[Double the Fist]

Well this board is 'flat out like a lizard drinking'

Flat out like a one armed taxi driver with a dose of the crabs

(During the Iraq war) Flat out like a Bagdad brickie

 

[snax]

my uncle used to say to me....

"does a lizard s**t on a flat rock?" or "does a fat dog fart?"

Always used to laugh- never new what he meant for years..

 

[Double the Fist]

my uncle used to say to me....

"does a lizard s**t on a flat rock?" or "does a fat dog fart?"

Always used to laugh- never new what he meant for years..

Does mouse s**t roll?
Does a one legged duck swim in a circle?

 

[CLUBMEDhurst]

Two that I've have heard to describe an exceptional looking woman.

I'd use her shite for toothpaste.

I'd swim through 20 feet of shite with my mouth open just to suck the **** of the last man that ******* her.

Brilliant HHH. Absolutely disgusting, but brilliant

 

[Herne Hill Hammer]

Brilliant HHH. Absolutely disgusting, but brilliant

Thank * for that. It's very ordinary but it did make me laugh my guts out when I heard it for the first time a few months ago.

 

[CLUBMEDhurst]

Thank **** for that. It's very ordinary but it did make me laugh my guts out when I heard it for the first time a few months ago.

Made my day. Big belly larfs.

And thank you, already gettin' good mileage out of it

 

[Waynesworld]

• Couldn't organise a root in a brothel with a fist full of fifties.
• Never argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
• There is more than 1 way to kill a cat than fill its arse full of clay.
• So hungry I could eat the back wheels off a miscarriage.

And one for the golfers. The worst shot that you could possibly hit, yet it still makes the green:

• Its like banging your sister. Doesn't feel right, but at least you're up there!

 

[Waynesworld]

6 pack short of a slab
couple of snags short of a barbie

 

[Double the Fist]

• So hungry I could eat the back wheels off a miscarriage.

Love it

 

[Kynge of Begrem]

All tip, no iceburg.

 

[Kynge of Begrem]

I would call you a c--t but you lack the warmth and the depth.

 

[Double the Fist]

I would call you a c--t but you lack the warmth and the depth.

LOL thats pretty good

 

[Farmer2Goggin]

> I'd challenge you to a battle of wits but you're only 1/2 armed
> Does Jack Newton swim in circles?
> Busier than a one armed wallpaperer
> Cold as your Mother-in-Laws kiss

 

[Kynge of Begrem]

Does Kay Cottee masturbate?

 

[Predator35]

Who took the jam out of your donut.
As dry as a nuns nasty.
Head like a half chewed pastie.

 

[snax]

Up s**t creek in a barbed wire canoe

I don't give a fat rat's crack

like a one legged man in an arsekicking contest

off like pa's pants on payday

well on that note.... i'm off like mum's undies on father's day!*