Autopsy Round 8: Sydney vs Hawks 3 things you learnt

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"elevates himself between two defenders" was the greatest rephrasing of "jumps up to catch the ball" I've ever heard.


Or Rioli he can take a hanger ...jumps an inch behind ted and plays on 10 metres out kicks a a goal

Ohhh hes a genius this man
 
Yeah but efficiency doesn't mean what one assumes it might. swansfan51 knows the details. But I think if Grundy bangs it long to a contest from where it immediately returns, it still counts as an effective disposal.
This is correct. A 15m chip to a loose player in defence also counts as an effective disposal, so defenders will pretty much always have higher DE
 
Jun 19, 2011
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Umpire's guidelines:
When a ball spills out in a tackle, it is considered a throw only if the player being tackled is Canadian.

The umpire may well have walked up to him and patted Mike on the head and said "nice try, Canuck, you'll get it some day". That was a terrible decision.
 
1. Hawthorn fans are the biggest bunch of entitled sooks in this or any other universe/dimension. Reading their autopsy thread, there is near-unanimous agreement that they were the better team on the night and only lost through bad kicking. Talk about loving the taste of your own piss.

We were clearly the better side. Hawthorn's night consisted of hacked kicks forward, and the misses they are complaining about were generally set shots from range after an exhausting contest. Our shots were from the goal square or from 10-20m out, because we outplayed their defence. They can bang on about "beating Buddy" all they want. Yeah, good game Frawley, maybe you missed the fact we basically ignored Buddy as a target all night and used other targets instead. You didn't beat Buddy, he was a decoy, numbnuts.

They were out-worked, out-played and out-coached. And a bunch of then squibbed the hard stuff. Q1, Jack and Burgoyne are coming on opposite directions for a loose ball, and Burgoyne couldn't s**t himself fast enough. Birchall and Suckling too... slightest hint of contact and they're running for the sidelines and hacking the ball in any direction in the hope the nasty Swans men will go away. Pathetic squibs.

2. See 1.

3. See 2.
 
Jun 2, 2014
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AFL website has outdone itself with this scintillating explanation as why Hawthorn lost "Had they not conceded the first five goals and then made a number of crucial errors late in the game, the result would’ve been different."
Pure gold:drunk:
 

SilentHunter_

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AFL website has outdone itself with this scintillating explanation as why Hawthorn lost "Had they not conceded the first five goals and then made a number of crucial errors late in the game, the result would’ve been different."
Pure gold:drunk:
The AFL just can't believe their beloved hawks lost, even after all that assistance from the umps :oops:.
 
Nov 20, 2007
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AFL website has outdone itself with this scintillating explanation as why Hawthorn lost "Had they not conceded the first five goals and then made a number of crucial errors late in the game, the result would’ve been different."
Pure gold:drunk:

Oh dear i can't wait for the second time we play them already.
 
May 5, 2015
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I thought the first quarter was good umpiring but I noticed Clarko had the umps in the huddle with him at quarter time.

Obviously Clarko got on the blower to AFLHQ just before quarter time

"Clarko here. WTF is going on with the umpiring ?"
"What's the problem Clarko. Seems fair and above board"
"F*&kin' exactly. Have you forgotten who the F£@k we are ?"
"No sir, you're the guy who's not allowed to go for a piss without taking the bus"
"What ?"
"I mean, you hit anyone who annoys you and your players hit like dogs from behind"
"Right. So stop f*&king annoying me and get your umpires to sort this mess"
"They're doing all they can"
"What ? The Swans are winning. They keep bumping and tackling hard and being aggressive towards us."
"But you did that in the GF and we didn't give them frees"
"Idiot. Haven't you heard the Melbourne media. We are the greatest team of the decade. Put the boss on"
"The boss of the AFL ?"
"Yes now. Get me Eddie"
<Nervous fingers fumble the keys for Eddie's private line......>
"Eddie's complaint line. Press 1 for Cola. 2 for Academies. 3 for umpiring and aaaah, s**t, what comes next ? Oh, yeah, 4 for Trading bans"
<Clarko presses 3>
"Welcome to umpire complaints. Your calls may be recorded for training purposes, unless you're from Essendon in which case no records will be kept"
"Eddie, it's Clarko"
" 'Sup Clarko. You wanna be a millionaire ?"
"Eddie, I need help with umpiring"
"Are they being unfair ?"
"Of course they're not being unfair. That's just the point. They're being way too fair. Why the F^%K do you think I'm calling ?"
"Are you asking me to influence the umpiring ? 'Cause the answer is no. The AFL have principles. Just ask ASADA."
"But we're being beaten"
"Really beaten ?"
"Thrashed. If this goes on we'll be just one game ahead of Melbourne"
<Eddie chuckles at the thought but collects himself>
"s**t, that means Roos' rabble will be chasing your sorry ass. Crikey, Clarko. I thought you were the god-coach'
"Come on Eddie, you know that's your media who said I was. Besides, it's the $wanz who are thrashing us"
<Eerie silence before Eddie draws breath through clenched teeth>
"s**t. Why didn't you say The $wanz ? I'll send out the word"
"What word ?"
"Plan B"
"That's two words"
"No, it's one word and a letter"
"OK, what happens now ?"
"Plan B is reserved for emergency use only. It's so secret no-one talks about Plan B"
"Gee, is that like Longmire's secret Plan B ?"
"For f&^k's sake Clarko. This is a different Plan B. It's the AFL Plan B. I'm not even sure if Horse has a Plan B. Our BF Swans board spy says he doesn't and SS has never been wrong"
"So what does Plan B do exactly ?"
"Plan B starts emergency measures to 'rebalance the game'. It's all very technical. Leg End could detect it but few others. It's all a matter of finesse, nuances and subtle influences"
"So we get lots of frees for nothing ?"
"Pretty much"
"Cheers Eddie. I owe you."
"As long as you throw the next game"
"Sure and it won't even look like we threw it"
"How's that ?"
"'It's easy. We genuinely are crap"
Gold, pure gold that post
 

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1. Hawthorn fans are the biggest bunch of entitled sooks in this or any other universe/dimension. Reading their autopsy thread, there is near-unanimous agreement that they were the better team on the night and only lost through bad kicking. Talk about loving the taste of your own piss.

We were clearly the better side. Hawthorn's night consisted of hacked kicks forward, and the misses they are complaining about were generally set shots from range after an exhausting contest. Our shots were from the goal square or from 10-20m out, because we outplayed their defence. They can bang on about "beating Buddy" all they want. Yeah, good game Frawley, maybe you missed the fact we basically ignored Buddy as a target all night and used other targets instead. You didn't beat Buddy, he was a decoy, numbnuts.

They were out-worked, out-played and out-coached. And a bunch of then squibbed the hard stuff. Q1, Jack and Burgoyne are coming on opposite directions for a loose ball, and Burgoyne couldn't s**t himself fast enough. Birchall and Suckling too... slightest hint of contact and they're running for the sidelines and hacking the ball in any direction in the hope the nasty Swans men will go away. Pathetic squibs.

2. See 1.

3. See 2.

It's the post-2012 grand final excuses all over again.
 
May 5, 2015
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1: hardest game I've seen in a long time, gutsy tough fought win
2: Rohans not up to it, give Zak Jones a run just to see if he's up to it
3: Would love to see Hannas gps tracker, gets the accolades because he never stops, a gem.
 
Agree. It was just a ridiculous free in the context of a game where the ball was coming out under tackling pressure all night.

Worse than that was the holding the ball. If we get caught, 2 milliseconds later the whistle blows for holding the ball. Hawks players could do 720's and still just drop the ball and 'play on'. That one where Buddy had Burgoyne's arm, if that was one of our players they would have called holding the ball every time.
 
Just doesn't have the consistency over four quarters, miss tackles, looses his feet, beaten by his opponent too often, foot skills inconsistent. Tries hard but running out of patience with him.

Tries hard?
You don't get tired from doing nothing. Rohan busted a gut all night until he got subbed.
He is a becoming a bit like Rioli, defenders get scared when he is around.
 
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