Health Depression

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After reading the above probably a good thing I took a day off the other weak and missed a deadline. It was better than melting down by lunch.

In fact the recharge/perspective was needed as I looked forward to going back to work and went in clearer.
 
A very close friend of mine was on this and took her own life.

The casualness in how these are prescribed without acknowledging the dangerous side effects is tragic.

I am really sorry to hear about your loss. :(

I'm the opposite completely with Pristiq. It has been the only anti depressant that has stopped me from trying to kill myself every Tuesday. It took about 3 months and I had a lot of support for the first 3 months with psychologist and that CAT team keeping an eye on me because I actually did feel more suicidal at the start but now because of it I am starting to know what life is like when you don't always want to lay in bed in the dark and die.
 

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I am really sorry to hear about your loss. :(

I'm the opposite completely with Pristiq. It has been the only anti depressant that has stopped me from trying to kill myself every Tuesday. It took about 3 months and I had a lot of support for the first 3 months with psychologist and that CAT team keeping an eye on me because I actually did feel more suicidal at the start but now because of it I am starting to know what life is like when you don't always want to lay in bed in the dark and die.

Keeping up the mask with our connections we maintain can be more exhausting, but we keep it up to a certain extent. We have this simultaneous thing going on where we feel on the one hand that we 'should be coping better'.

Because everyone else is putting up this facade that they are; when they're ******* not, and we probably know that deep down, and on the other hand not wanting to feel like we're burdening people with our s**t... It can be a tough conversation to get going, but every time I see someone come out as struggling I only ever see people identifying with experiences and offering to support/listen, and it opens up opportunities to genuinely connect.

I am glad you have a support network around you. Which your survival instinct made you create. It can be easy to find yourself actively cutting yourself off from your support system when things are just too hard. My beautiful friend, on a subconscious level, did this. She didn't want to burden people with her "s**t". She didn't know how loved she is. She sent me kisses the night she did it and I won't go into the details leading up to the event and the guilt (among other things I felt afterwards (which is very common in these situations.)
Grief like this stays forever, and that's ok. However, grief changes shape.

This one rocked my world. But sometimes you gotta be smashed to pieces so you can build yourself back up to how you want to experience this wild ride we call life.
 
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Keeping up the mask with our connections we maintain can be more exhausting, but we keep it up to a certain extent. We have this simultaneous thing going on where we feel on the one hand that we 'should be coping better'.

Because everyone else is putting up this facade that they are; when they're ******* not, and we probably know that deep down, and on the other hand not wanting to feel like we're burdening people with our s**t... It can be a tough conversation to get going, but every time I see someone come out as struggling I only ever see people identifying with experiences and offering to support/listen, and it opens up opportunities to genuinely connect.

I am glad you have a support network around you. Which your survival instinct made you create. It can be easy to find yourself actively cutting yourself off from your support system when things are just too hard. My beautiful friend, on a subconscious level, did this. She didn't want to burden people with her "s**t". She didn't know how loved she is. She sent me kisses the night she did it and I won't go into the details leading up to the event and the guilt (among other things I felt afterwards (which is very common in these situations.)
Grief like this stays forever, and that's ok. However, grief changes shape.

This one rocked my world. But sometimes you gotta be smashed to pieces so you can build yourself back up to how you want to experience this wild ride we call life.

This is one of the most true and powerful things I have read.

When you are describing your friend and what she did and said beforehand. You could have easily been describing me on the many attempts that put me in hospital.

Reading your post actually made me tear up. Just because it's just very raw and yeah, thanks for sharing this.
 
This is one of the most true and powerful things I have read.

When you are describing your friend and what she did and said beforehand. You could have easily been describing me on the many attempts that put me in hospital.

Reading your post actually made me tear up. Just because it's just very raw and yeah, thanks for sharing this.

Thanks, Ceager Macleod for saying thanks - funnily enough, your response made me tear up too.

Which is precisely both of our points; every time i see someone come out as struggling we only ever see people identifying with experiences and offering to support/listen, and it opens up opportunities to genuinely connect.

Good luck my friend :)
 
The suicide of Bourdain showed something important that many people miss. People get on social media; they lament the suicide victim, how they are there to listen and that people need to pay attention to those suffering. Even if the struggling gives off warning signs like a mother*er, no one reaches out. They aren't concerned with the person, not even when they are gone. They are concerned with the attention they can garner from their loss. It's insanity. I've seen it happen. Social media reduces empathy. Breaks it down, and narcissism rises.

There's a belief that you have to be happy if your standard of life, globally, is superior to that of the vast majority. This is Australia; we know most of us live better than 99% of the world. Awareness of this fact changes nothing. The truth is, warmness, agreeableness, liveliness, openness to experience, bubbliness, optimism, hope, enthusiasm, motivation, and a love of life, come more naturally to some than it does for others. I don't think you can fake it until you make it. You'll always be a fake and the facade will wear you down. Nothing genuinely changes with that approach.
 
6FA79EE2-8D98-4DBC-8D77-43CC5A0E1AF7.png 9E107F32-9D0D-47E8-92C2-C0EFC7424B3A.png Hey everyone,
Just reading through this entire thread and I am amazed at the strength and courage shown by people here with their willingness to share their stories of struggle. I thought my last year of hell was bad, but compared to some of you I’ve got nothing to worry about really.
The fact that I’ve never taken any type of antidepressant medication or seen a shrink makes me feel like I’ve had it mild.

But of course there’s many of you here that having been in a living mental hell for many years and I realise how hard it must be to live a “ normal” life. But everyone has something going on in their heads. Everyone.

A few ideas to help...some already have been mentioned but there really are some important ones that are worth repeating.

1. Delete and remove most of your social media. Namely Instagram, Twitter and any other platform that’s focused on image, worthless gossip, news, celebrity crap etc.
The idea is focus on yourself...to be whole and remove useless information from the mind.

2. Keep Facebook ...but delete all “ fb friends” who are not part of your inner circle of close family and true friends.
18 months ago I went from 300 odd down to 10 in one night. Best thing I’ve ever done. You won’t miss out on anything trust me.

3. Delete all rubbish fb pages you like except ones that make a positive impact on your mind. Keep ones that are about your favourite hobbies or any that make you happy. Really ask yourself which newsfeeds and notifications make you feel good and which ones don’t. Unlike and get rid of anything negative.
Search and discover the many amazingly positive fb groups and pages that will give you uplifting, positive messages on a daily basis.
Brainpickings and Stoics pages are two I highly recommend.

4. Bannish alcohol from your routine and find other things to do after work and on weekends. If you’re out in a social setting with people drinking alcohol...don’t believe for one second anyone cares if you’re not getting drunk. Alcohol is the devils playground for depression. Same with pot or any other drug.

5. Join a gym and just start lifting weights...cardio work ..get advice if you’re a novice. The adrenaline intake works wonders on self confidence and will tire you out at night giving you a good nights sleep.
Stress, depression and anxiety causes exhaustion of the mind..but being that mentally tired can still prevent you from sleeping properly because ones entire nervous system is on full boil. Tire yourself out physically and sleep better.


Go for walks in parks, get down to local pool and swim some laps, ride a bike...keep moving if in a state of anxiety.
Household chores are great too...do things that keep you on your feet and doing something busy.

6. Don’t watch the news on tv or read the newspaper filled with the problems of society. You won’t miss out on anything believe me.

7. When feeling low...talk to friend...but try to focus on conversations that are happy and positive. Talk to your closest friends beforehand and let them know that if you seek them in times of depression or anxiety, ask them to help you by steering conversions away from the dark and grime. Acknowledge the moment of darkness of course, but try not to dwell on it while chatting. It helps lighten you up.

8. Get to a yoga class. Just book in somewhere and go along. It’s a wonderful way to practice mindfulness and let thoughts flow around in your mind while surrounded by peaceful harmony. Try it.

Hope this helps in some way and gives you ideas.
No one is ever truly alone...reach out to those who love you.
The human spirit of love and understanding is limitless.
Believe it. Embrace it.
 
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Yep, great post. Maria Popova is amazing. Another good one is Alain de Botton's 'School of Life.' I don't follow any news either, just a few of the top science news sources, like Nature, and Smithsonian. Also, love The Onion and Cyanide & Happiness for a laugh.

And how could I forget, Elon Musk. I love hearing what that crazy bastard has to say, and what he retweets. I know people say he isn't the smartest man in the world, has some marks against him, etc., but it's still a fact that his companies are engaging in some of the most technologically exciting things we have ever seen.
 
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Yep, great post. Maria Popova is amazing. Another good one is Alain de Botton's 'School of Life.' I don't follow any news either, just a few of the top science news sources, like Nature, and Smithsonian. Also, love The Onion and Cyanide & Happiness for a laugh.

And how could I forget, Elon Musk. I love hearing what that crazy bastard has to say, and what he posts about. I know people say he isn't the smartest man in the world, has some marks against him, etc., but it's still a fact that his companies are engaging in some of the most technologically exciting things we have ever known.

Popova’s daily output of quality material is simply outstanding.
After awhile, you realise how much has been written about depression
going back over centuries..back to the ancient Greeks.

Then there’s the dozens of articles quoting most of the greatest writers in history on the themes of love and the simple joy of living.

She’s awesome.


De Botton’s school of life is another one I follow too..read a number of his books as well. He’s a wonderful human.

The School of Life YouTube channel is an absolute treasure trove of amazing videos that give great insights into the human mind living in this modern world.

After a few days of going through the endless information on offer, one cannot help but realise we are all highly complex creatures with issues galore.

But understanding that we’re all in the same boat, in some form or another, helps the ones really struggling to get through the bad times and push on. To accept that it’s ok to get help from loved ones, seek professional advice and start a journey towards leading a happy and mentally healthy life.
 
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View attachment 514808 View attachment 514807 Hey everyone,
Just reading through this entire thread and I am amazed at the strength and courage shown by people here with their willingness to share their stories of struggle. I thought my last year of hell was bad, but compared to some of you I’ve got nothing to worry about really.
The fact that I’ve never taken any type of antidepressant medication or seen a shrink makes me feel like I’ve had it mild.

But of course there’s many of you here that having been in a living mental hell for many years and I realise how hard it must be to live a “ normal” life. But everyone has something going on in their heads. Everyone.

A few ideas to help...some already have been mentioned but there really are some important ones that are worth repeating.

1. Delete and remove most of your social media. Namely Instagram, Twitter and any other platform that’s focused on image, worthless gossip, news, celebrity crap etc.
The idea is focus on yourself...to be whole and remove useless information from the mind.

2. Keep Facebook ...but delete all “ fb friends” who are not part of your inner circle of close family and true friends.
18 months ago I went from 300 odd down to 10 in one night. Best thing I’ve ever done. You won’t miss out on anything trust me.

3. Delete all rubbish fb pages you like except ones that make a positive impact on your mind. Keep ones that are about your favourite hobbies or any that make you happy. Really ask yourself which newsfeeds and notifications make you feel good and which ones don’t. Unlike and get rid of anything negative.
Search and discover the many amazingly positive fb groups and pages that will give you uplifting, positive messages on a daily basis.
Brainpickings and Stoics pages are two I highly recommend.

4. Bannish alcohol from your routine and find other things to do after work and on weekends. If you’re out in a social setting with people drinking alcohol...don’t believe for one second anyone cares if you’re not getting drunk. Alcohol is the devils playground for depression. Same with pot or any other drug.

5. Join a gym and just start lifting weights...cardio work ..get advice if you’re a novice. The adrenaline intake works wonders on self confidence and will tire you out at night giving you a good nights sleep.
Stress, depression and anxiety causes exhaustion of the mind..but being that mentally tired can still prevent you from sleeping properly because ones entire nervous system is on full boil. Tire yourself out physically and sleep better.


Go for walks in parks, get down to local pool and swim some laps, ride a bike...keep moving if in a state of anxiety.
Household chores are great too...do things that keep you on your feet and doing something busy.

6. Don’t watch the news on tv or read the newspaper filled with the problems of society. You won’t miss out on anything believe me.

7. When feeling low...talk to friend...but try to focus on conversations that are happy and positive. Talk to your closest friends beforehand and let them know that if you seek them in times of depression or anxiety, ask them to help you by steering conversions away from the dark and grime. Acknowledge the moment of darkness of course, but try not to dwell on it while chatting. It helps lighten you up.

8. Get to a yoga class. Just book in somewhere and go along. It’s a wonderful way to practice mindfulness and let thoughts flow around in your mind while surrounded by peaceful harmony. Try it.

Hope this helps in some way and gives you ideas.
No one is ever truly alone...reach out to those who love you.
The human spirit of love and understanding is limitless.
Believe it. Embrace it.

1,2,3,5 done.

But i'm so tired after work/the day/putting up a facade that there is nothing else to do but 4. And even then the next day I get a s**t load of energy. I think because I must have a problem with blood sugar, motivation, energy etc that booze is the petrol that fuels me. Also I tend to be very introverted and shy. But with booze I've managed to be in secure employment for 4 years and easily able to navigate politics and complaints.
 
1,2,3,5 done.

But i'm so tired after work/the day/putting up a facade that there is nothing else to do but 4. And even then the next day I get a s**t load of energy. I think because I must have a problem with blood sugar, motivation, energy etc that booze is the petrol that fuels me. Also I tend to be very introverted and shy. But with booze I've managed to be in secure employment for 4 years and easily able to navigate politics and complaints.


There’s a fine line between drinking to relax vs drinking to numb the mind...tread carefully my friend.
 
So it's been just over 6 years since this post and after having things go really well for a few years, Thursday saw me have a complete mental breakdown. Standing in the kitchen at work and out of nowhere I started sobbing, from there thoughts turned to grabbing the carving knife out of the drawer and slicing the wrists, then came thoughts of shoving my hands in the flat bed toaster to injure myself. Thankfully before any of that could happen I grabbed my lunch and headed back to my desk thinking I could snap out of it by doing some work, but the sobbing only got worse and the thoughts just kept on coming, like jump in the car and plough into the river nearby and drown myself. Plough the car into a tree and explode in flames. The only thing that stopped me was the picture of my wife and I that sits right beside my screen, looking at that I didn't want to put her through anymore pain and leave her with the 2 boys, so I walk away from my desk to get away from my keys and sent a message saying I can't stop thinking of hurting myself and I'm really sorry.

Out the back the thoughts of self harm kept on coming and I'm looking at photos of my father(who killed himself) and my wife sobbing even more. Thankfully before I could do anything else the ladies that I work with came out and found me and kept me from doing anything. My wife arrived at work shortly after and took me home. Went to the doctors the next morning and doctor was extremely concerned for the state of mind I was in and he had the local mental health unit call me to screen me over the phone to see if anything more was needed. At the moment they haven't locked me away,and I am now on a much stronger medication which has slowed the thoughts of self harm, but they are still there from time to time.

Now some might ask what the **** are you doing on Big Footy after an episode like that, well talking about footy is about the only thing that does help stop the thoughts, when I am on here and engaged in a debate about footy it gives me something else to focus on. Unfortunately it sometimes hinders as some posters think that it is great to make things personal and attack me personally. Thankfully the ignore feature means I don't have to put up with them when I don't want to. But those guys are nothing compared to the other issues that are dogging me.

I'm trying to keep swimming, but at the moment I feel like I'm drowning and there is nobody around to throw me a lifeline, however I am now seeing a psych something that I probably needed to do a few years ago so hopefully that will pull me back around.
How’s the swim going mate?
 
I am exhausted and don't know what to do. Have been under a lot of stress lately and hitting the bottle hard. But there is no other way. How else do you conjure up the energy to get through a day? I am no longer capable of working anymore. Not sure I have it in me for 40 hr weeks. But have no choice as the alternative I can't handle anymore. Plus a bunch of other s**t I can't even begin to contemplate. I feel trapped because I am. Just feel sick and need a break but everything is just relentless and has been and always will be. Need to have some strategy to face it.
 
I am exhausted and don't know what to do. Have been under a lot of stress lately and hitting the bottle hard. But there is no other way. How else do you conjure up the energy to get through a day? I am no longer capable of working anymore. Not sure I have it in me for 40 hr weeks. But have no choice as the alternative I can't handle anymore. Plus a bunch of other s**t I can't even begin to contemplate. I feel trapped because I am. Just feel sick and need a break but everything is just relentless and has been and always will be. Need to have some strategy to face it.

you know what? i'm sitting here, just come home from work, almost in tears. don't know why, just sort of holding myself together and not letting myself get into a full-blown blubber. i dropped by dan's on the way home and grabbed a 6 pack of bundy and coke, dying to get into them but i can't yet.
i run every morning at 5.30 and go to the gym every night. i like to bookend the day with exercise, the run get's me through to the late afternoon with adrenaline and the gym session starts me up again and prevents me from dwelling on how sad I am until i go to bed and can sleep it off.
* me, this helps. the high i get after coming back from a run, well, *, you feel bulletproof! and coming home from the gym, especially after doing arms when you're swole as anything and you feel like the biggest bloke in the world. it's an awesome feeling.
try it mate
 
I am exhausted and don't know what to do. Have been under a lot of stress lately and hitting the bottle hard. But there is no other way. How else do you conjure up the energy to get through a day? I am no longer capable of working anymore. Not sure I have it in me for 40 hr weeks. But have no choice as the alternative I can't handle anymore. Plus a bunch of other s**t I can't even begin to contemplate. I feel trapped because I am. Just feel sick and need a break but everything is just relentless and has been and always will be. Need to have some strategy to face it.

you know what? i'm sitting here, just come home from work, almost in tears. don't know why, just sort of holding myself together and not letting myself get into a full-blown blubber. i dropped by dan's on the way home and grabbed a 6 pack of bundy and coke, dying to get into them but i can't yet.
i run every morning at 5.30 and go to the gym every night. i like to bookend the day with exercise, the run get's me through to the late afternoon with adrenaline and the gym session starts me up again and prevents me from dwelling on how sad I am until i go to bed and can sleep it off.
**** me, this helps. the high i get after coming back from a run, well, ****, you feel bulletproof! and coming home from the gym, especially after doing arms when you're swole as anything and you feel like the biggest bloke in the world. it's an awesome feeling.
try it mate

Definitely agree. I was in a similar place not so long ago. Going for a run every not I g and night helped. Good way to clear the head and set in a routine. Don't give up. It will get easier.
 

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