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Thank god, I thought it was just me that had the irrational hatred for Clippy the paperclip.
It's gay as well, not that there's anything wrong with that.
Tex, Boyd or Watts. Someone is going to be Nollsy in this situation.
Watts was number 7. I opt for WingnutTex, Boyd or Watts. Someone is going to be Nollsy in this situation.
Yeah pretty much. Maybe we should hypnotize him before every game, tell him it's the Grand Final and he'll rise to the occasionAs someone who follows a perennially-unsuccessful club, I can only fantasize about being in the Bulldog's position.
Boyd basically WON YOU A PREMIERSHIP.
He could light up a smoke in the middle of a game, and he still has earned every cent you would ever pay him, forever.... he made you PREMIERS.
I wouldn't care if it was a couple of years ago, not in the slightest... I still listen to people tell stories of being there in 1966. This is recent history... that would do me.
No Pies on list? Clearly Daniel Wells will get a gig at 1 or 2.
He earnt every single penny of his contract on 1/10/2016Anyway Tom you will always be a hero to Bulldog fans for your 2016 exploits and a hero to the fans of 17 other teams as they don't have your massive contract on their books
He earnt every single penny of his contract on 1/10/2016
Serious question, aren't they all...
Was that effort on Sam Naismith the only above average game in his career?
*Did LOL at "Moffra couldn't assault a teenager if he tried."
The Prelim the week before (against Mumford) was arguably better...
...those are really the only 2 games that were though.
Player #1 - Tom Boyd
Pictured: Tom Boyd celebrates making Brian Taylor swear on MMM
In the end, there could be only one. The one. The man, the myth, the legend himself.
This summary could be very short and simple: the Bulldogs this year had statistically the worst forward 50 efficiency coupled with statistically the worst ruck division in the competition, and Tom Boyd is a million dollar ruck/forward. Putting everything into the Mofrometer in a variety of ways still led to Tom being the unanimous choice as the no 1 player this year.
Yes I am aware he was fantastic at the end of 2016, but this is the 2018 Bottom 50. Past exploits are no guarantee of future (or current) performance in a sporting theory known as 'the Mundine principle'.
Tom went at half a goal per game and 17 hit outs on average this year, coupled with roughly 7 effective disposals per game with a disposal efficiency below 65%. He managed 10 scoring shots in total for the year at 200cm and 103kgs. His metres gained average this year was 165m - most cups of luke-warm mid strength beer at Etihad travel further per game.
As a ruckman he was 'an honest battler' and as a forward he was 'looking like a resting ruckman' which might be ok for a 20 year old off the rookie list but this was a consensus pick #1 picked just ahead of Josh Kelly at 2 and Marcus Bontempelli at pick 4.
He did have the good sense to wait only 12 months prior to getting the hell out of Western Sydney (unlike half of Carlton's list that wait a few years) but even then he cost pick 6 and a former pick 3 who was also the club captain and the third best in his team player according to B&F results.
Tellingly, only a few days earlier the Giants declared he would "not be traded under any circumstances" which was about a believable as a St Kilda player saying "we'll just cuddle, I swear". That u-turn was sadly a faster change of direction than anything Tom's shown in the past 2 years.
He's also taken only 20 contested marks in the past two years despite being a man mountain and the theories on this are numerous. One of those theories talked about at length on the Bulldogs board is the small size of his hands relative to his height (seriously). This Trump theory makes sense when you consider he also is overpaid and was once orange. You know what they say - smal hands smlal... gloves. Apologies for the typos, somteimes it's hrad to type proprely with my massive hands.
Gary Lyon, the 'Wayne Carey' of the commentary world, described Boyd as extremely disappointing this year citing his lack of presence in contests. It's true given Boyd this year was overtaken by Schache who was a last minute, 2nd & 3rd rounder trade at the end of 2017 after two unproductive years at Brisbane. Schache is also two years younger than Tom and covers more ground as a forward.
Tom has done some fantastic work this year in the mental health sphere and by all accounts is a thoughtful young man, a deep thinker who is considerate of others which is almost a shame as the best tall forwards appear to be self-absorbed glory hunters with egos bigger than Vihrat Kohli on a coke bender. I'm sure being under constant scrutiny would be a little of an ego-killer but seriously Tom you're 200cm, built like a bricksh....elter, you're considered good looking by female Bulldog fans...
... relatively, you're wealthy, can surf and unusually for many footballers can string a sentence together. CRASH A BLOODY PACK WITH YOUR KNEE OUT YOU BASTARD, YOU CAN DO IT JUST BLOODY DO IT!!!
Anyway Tom you will always be a hero to Bulldog fans for your 2016 exploits and a hero to the fans of 17 other teams as they don't have your massive contract on their books (even though North could afford you, given their 'war chest' and all).
Thank you for everything and thank you for rounding out this years' Bottom 50.