Mega Thread Things that s**t me the Thirteenth

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Dhoni Dakurri

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Oct 18, 2016
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I hate bucks parties. If I ever get married I am putting my foot down and flat out refusing one and if my mates organise one I will be walking out.

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I didn’t have a hens
Did HBF have a bucks ?
I hate bucks parties. If I ever get married I am putting my foot down and flat out refusing one and if my mates organise one I will be walking out.
I would just have a high tea or perhaps dinner and karaoke and leave it at that . I’d pay for my girlfriends and keep it small/low key as a thank you .
 
I hate bucks parties. If I ever get married I am putting my foot down and flat out refusing one and if my mates organise one I will be walking out.
I'd probably be the same.

Only because I've been best man twice & have organised some interesting things because "that's what you do."

Cliches.
 
Sounds like a mad time

Ever thought maybe your mates wouldn’t have even gone away if you just went somewhere away from the comforts of home and did what you do every other weekend? Leaving town to go play video games isn’t exactly appealing.
My point was the bucks party isn't really about the buck, we had a rough lead up to the wedding with family and other things going on that meant I didn't really feel like having a big expensive late night out.
I just wanted to hang out with my best mates and have a quiet night in but they thought then knew better and that I would regret not having the big cliche night.
They all had fun and I went home pissed off because the night wasn't what I wanted, best man was too caught up in organising the good bucks party and making sure everyone else had a good time
 
May 5, 2016
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Got a mate’s bucks coming up next weekend. But his missus is dead against him seeing any t***ies. So apart from him missing out on all the shenanigans of bucks parties in the past, it will be an early night for him.

He needs to grow some balls and she needs to chill out. Doesn’t bode well for their marriage.


We had one recently and in truth it will be one of the last we ever have in our group as basically everyone is married.
Along with me and maybe 2-3 others he’s one of the few who’s partner doesn’t give a s**t if we go to the ‘rips.
Unfortunately he’s also a cop so he thought the smart option would be to have a spit, a couple of kegs, and a backyard session from midday to the early hours rather than go on a boys trip.
 
May 5, 2016
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I had the time of my life at my bucks.
Beers in the park opposite the Coogee Bay Hotel all day, back to the hotel we were staying at for shower beers, then to the cross. Myself and 3 others were last men standing, no one played up despite the volume of nudity, wish i could do it all again
 

PT Bar None

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Of all the bucks shows I've attended, the one that got the most loose was a boys weekend away, camping on the river. Took a spit with us.

One of the underrated bonuses of the Gentlemen's Club is that it comes with responsible service of alcohol and bouncers.

The river doesn't. Luckily the only thing that died was the spit. Cost the clowns who ruined it $3,000 to replace IIRC
 
I’ve never really understood guys fascination with t***ies - they are just that - ****. See one pair, seen them all
When you see a big pair swinging in the wind they're like pendulums though, you can't take your eyes off them. They're mesmerising.
 
When you see a big pair swinging in the wind they're like pendulums though, you can't take your eyes off them. They're mesmerising.

Not much fun carrying around them around though - hurts the shoulders, neck and back
 
Coke and hookers?
Plus getting my cousin the cop to "arrest" the groom, slap on the cuffs & throw him in the back of a divvy van.

The rest is best not said.;)
 
I didn’t have a hens

My Mum had something called a 'Kitchen Tea'. Sounds pretty boring, but that is the kind of thing she would do.

Also, saying 'Kitchen Tea' just sounds weird, like those words don't go together
 
My Mum had something called a 'Kitchen Tea'. Sounds pretty boring, but that is the kind of thing she would do.

Also, saying 'Kitchen Tea' just sounds weird, like those words don't go together

Kitchen teas are boring af.

In america theyd call them bridal showers i think??
 
My Mum had something called a 'Kitchen Tea'. Sounds pretty boring, but that is the kind of thing she would do.

Also, saying 'Kitchen Tea' just sounds weird, like those words don't go together
I just call them Bridal Showers :)
Edit- should've refreshed. I tend to avoid knowingly using Americanisms so if it's indeed an American term, I'll make the switch haha

Edit 2- Ok I checked wikipedia- yes Bridal Shower is an American/Canadian term, but it's also used in India and Pakistan apparently.

That would explain why I hear the term thrown around a lot by extended family members and family friends.

A traditional hens with strippers etc wouldn't be very socially acceptable ;)
 
Kitchen teas are boring af.

In america theyd call them bridal showers i think??
I just call them Bridal Showers :)

They're pretty much the same, a gathering to celebrate the Bride. According to Google, however, the KT usually involves bringing the Bride a present for the kitchen (which I'd presume is something like a toaster or a kettle).

They sound awfully boring though, it's almost as though 80th Birthday and Kitchen Tea are interchangeable terms. Stereotypically you're young-ish, as if you would stay inside with a cup of tea rather than going out and getting smashed

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Got a mate’s bucks coming up next weekend. But his missus is dead against him seeing any t***ies. So apart from him missing out on all the shenanigans of bucks parties in the past, it will be an early night for him.

He needs to grow some balls and she needs to chill out. Doesn’t bode well for their marriage.

Reckon you should have a word with her. Or tell her there's no t***ies then hire some strippers or escorts and a room and let them at him. He should wear protection though
 

William Wonka

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May 28, 2016
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I’ve never really understood guys fascination with t***ies - they are just that - ****. See one pair, seen them all
The differences are subtle but definite.
An almost infinite variety of shape, size and colour, each pair a delightful work of art.

Seeing one pair simply starts one on a lifelong quest to see them all.

When you see a big pair swinging in the wind they're like pendulums though, you can't take your eyes off them. They're mesmerising.
And this is from a gentleman whos interests lie elsewhere.
 
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