Toast Vale Danny Frawley.

[sammm]

I'm so upset. no words .....

even though this has not touched me personally as i didn't know Danny personally. Both my mum (who passed away in may) and myself were / are die hard saints.

and between my father dying last year, my uncle dying last year, my mum (who i was real close to) dying in May, this is justjust upset me

 

[NarklesHelmet]

I'm only old enough to have seen a handful of his games at Waverley but the footage of him and Tony Shaw at the coin toss before the final 1992 Elim final is one of my favorite bits of vision.

It’s hard to think of things like what you’ve highlighted and not get emotional today. It just summed up the man, our club, and his love for it. A more loyal Sainter you’d never see.

I also remember his last game vividly. Me and a mate made the long and rare trek out to Whitten Oval for his last game. I reckon there were a good few thousand of us Sainters there standing on the Doug Hawkins wing that day (probably many of you were there too). It felt like an old Moorabin day, almost a home game. We won it for Spud but it was a sad day for all, had a real end of an era feeling to it.

It’s been a tough 24 hours for sure, it’s not every day you lose a heart and soul person of the football club, it’s just a tragedy.

 

[sammm]

Unfortunately Channel 7 news has just confirmed what was leaked to the media by vicpol yesterday. That Danny's death will not be counted in the road toll, nor are their any suspicious circumstances. A report is being prepared for the Coroner. That is cop jargon for suicide. Vale Danny.

* and to the current serving police member who took delight in leaking the news, in order to bignote himself, I know you look at this site, and you know who I am. For the record, having worked with you on and off for a decade, I formed the opinion you were a two faced, back stabbing maggot who thought nothing of selling out drug jobs and endangering young police, myself included.

Your actions yesterday just confirm my judgement and that of many others was justified.

I Hope you're feeling very satisfied with yourself, seeing as your openly stated opinion on suicidal members is that they are nothing but weak c*nts. Yes folks, this creature inhabits the upper ranks. Proof that mediocrity rises to the top in large bureaucracies.
I'm sure you'll get a call from IBAC, maggot. And if you don't know, there is no statute of limitation on serious indictable offences. Like selling sensitive information to drug dealers, conspiring with them and receiving money in return from them.

you should report the guy anonymously to IBAC

 

[Jughead77]

A day later and I'm still struggling to process it all. When I think of Spud's family and what they're going through, straight away, memories of my own experiences start flooding back.

It was barely 5 years ago, that I lost my mother suddenly and unexpectedly. I was living 8000km away in Macau at the time and i found out about her death through social media posts. Apparently, these days everyone wants to be first to break tragic news, without thinking of relatives who haven't yet been informed.

When i think about Spud's daughter, alone in America, being woken up in the early hours with such tragic news, I can actually feel the same pain which i felt all those years ago. Also, knowing she has to make the same long journey home to bury a parent, as i once did, just breaks my heart.

Anyway, there's a lot more id like to say and share about Spud, his impact on my life, the 'confrontation' we had, parallels between our lives, etc. But, atm I'm not quite ready to let it all out.

For now, I'm just hoping the Frawley family can find strength and courage to face the coming days. Hopefully, they can feel the love everyone has for Spud, and use it to draw peace and comfort through these dark days.

 

[Blue Heart]

My young fella loved Bounce.
My heart sank this evening when he asked me if it was possible that the news on the radio of Danny’s passing might be a mistake and it broke when he asked if the ambulance could still save him
Vale Spud

A beautiful story which encapsulates the innocence of youth.

 

[Tommy Wigs]

I don't want to talk out of school and may have just misheard but apparently Channel 7 mentioned tonight that he wont be part of the roads death toll...meaning it was intentional...

If true this just keeps getting sadder and sadder.

Sure is. Does 7 really have to even raise this?

 

[Tommy Wigs]

My wife mentioned listening to SEN and a caller suggested the players have some kind of a small 2 on the top right or left of the jumper, so that they carry Spud with them. That’s a good suggestion IMV.

 

[CaptainRisky]

The day he retired at the Western Oval..

So glad I got to share that special day and even bigger night with the great man pretty sure the Beva was with us too and a heap of other supporters

 

[MOLTEN GANGLANDS]

waves it is. I am having trouble currently and in a bad place. and probably my kids keeping me in play. they are 11, 9, 3- I couldn't imagine leaving them. but some days are ******* hard.. yesterday must have been hell for danny rest his soul

we're here to help Parker Tatts, feel free to inbox me if you're feeling low. It will get better, and from the sounds of it you're a very good dad. Those kids need and love you so much. Hang in there. Also get some professional help if you can, you can get 10 free sessions through your GP, the hardest part can sometimes be actually telling your GP, my gf's a psychologist and she talks a lot about how GPs are often a big barrier in getting people to actually seek help, sometimes they seem like they just don't give a s**t, but once you get past that hurdle everything gets better.

 

[Mowman]

we're here to help Parker Tatts, feel free to inbox me if you're feeling low. It will get better, and from the sounds of it you're a very good dad. Those kids need and love you so much. Hang in there. Also get some professional help if you can, you can get 10 free sessions through your GP, the hardest part can sometimes be actually telling your GP, my gf's a psychologist and she talks a lot about how GPs are often a big barrier in getting people to actually seek help, sometimes they seem like they just don't give a s**t, but once you get past that hurdle everything gets better.

Hey Mate,
A couple of your post today having been nothing but first class and some of the best stuff i have read on here. Great Stuff MG

 

[GrammarPolice]

Spud was the glue that kept us all together. He's the only one, who could easily mingle with players from the 70s, 80s 90s, 00s, 10s, without looking out of place. We've had plenty of great players over the years, but none were as proud of St Kilda as Spud. He was truly a one of a kind.

 

[MOLTEN GANGLANDS]

Hey Mate,
A couple of your post today having been nothing but first class and some of the best stuff i have read on here. Great Stuff MG

cheers mow, I'll be back to my usual dribble very soon!

 

[brutus76]

My Mum's a diehard Sainter and she's devastated.

Spud you were a bloody ripper.

Always embraced his country roots (as i do) and did so much for country footy, country people and ex players and coaches.

Was always "The Boy from Bungaree" and never had an ego or attitude. He was just Spud.

Selfless, always giving and a true St Kilda icon.

Thanks Spud for reminding us country boys to never be ashamed of our roots and to embrace who we are where we grew up and to give back and help out where we can.

I may live in the big smoke in QLD but i like you will always introduce myself as a boy from a similar little country town in Western Victoria with less than 500 people and damn proud of it.

I met Spud once fleetingly in my teens in the 90s. His brother Tony was a coach/football development person/scout/recruiter in the Ballarat area for the then NORTH BALLARAT REBELS and they came to an Interleague game i played in on a zone team vs a Ballarat league Under 16s team on a Sunday.

Had a Saints sports jacket and jeans on and it just a quick G'day Boys and G'day Mate and a couple of quick words and good luck.

Danny.......You leave a gaping hole in the greater football community. To Anita and the girls our thoughts are with you.

I'm sure Barks will look after him

 

[jc37]

Danny Frawley was everything you would want in a human, club person and player. I think it would be impossible to find someone who didn't like him and the endless stories of him make you realise how great he was even when you already thought he was great. May the Spud spirit live on both at St Kilda and within the AFL. Condolences to his family friends and everyone who was touched by him. RIP Spud you will be missed but never forgotten.

 

[RICHOLEGEND12]

Hey guys. Apologies for the intrusion and for the long post. But I posted this on the tiges board and I think it's a great little story about spud and hopefully it brings a laugh to a few of you guys in this bloody s**t time for your club. It's from his days as a coach at the tiges and was originally published a few years ago.

No Cookies | Herald Sun

No Cookies

www.heraldsun.com.au

It happened at Richmond in 2004 when our coach Danny “Spud” Frawley was in a similar position to the one Hird is in now. After making a prelim in 2001 we had some pretty lean years under Spud, culminating in a 14-game losing streak to finish the 2004 season.

I couldn’t tell you what game it was after but some time towards the end of the year I remember driving to the club on a Monday after another loss and sitting in traffic on Punt Road and really dreading what I’d find there.

There’d been a lot of speculation in the paper that day about Spud’s job and as I got closer to the club I could see the big aerials that sit on top of the media vans sticking up from the car park and immediately thought, “This isn’t a good sign, something’s going on.”

I made my way past the reporters and got into the club and the first thing on the agenda was a team meeting upstairs in the Graeme Richmond room. The whole team was in there, it was pretty tense and sombre, no one was saying much, but there was one glaring absence — Spud wasn’t there.

We waited about 15 minutes and finally we heard him walking up the stairs. I was looking down at my feet as he entered the room because you know you’re every chance to cop a spray if you make eye contact. When I looked up, Spud was standing up the front of the group and he had a compressor we used to pump up the footballs on the ground next to him.

We’re all starting to think, “Maybe Spud has lost the plot here, what the hell is he doing?” He just stood there and he was looking at us and then he slowly bent down, picked up the compressor and held it up above his head.

He kept looking around and then said fairly quietly, “What am I boys?” No one said anything. He waited another 10 or 20 seconds and then said a little bit louder, “What am I boys?” No one knew what to say, so no one said anything. So a third time, with the compressor still above his head, Spud really yelled it, “WHAT AM I BOYS?”

One of the young players who made the rookie error of sitting in the front row finally broke the silence and said, “I don’t know Spud, what are you?” And Spud replied: “I’M UNDER THE BLOODY PUMP!”

Everyone roared with laughter and it really eased the tension in the room, which was obviously his intention. It summed up Spud as a character — he could always find a bit of humour in the most dire situation. It didn’t help him in the long run — later in the season he announced he was going to resign at the end of the year — but I’ll never forget that classic one-liner.

It might not have changed anything but there was a bit of method in Spud’s madness that day at Richmond. Sometimes it doesn’t hurt to get a bit of humour in the place

 

[austinnn]

As the news filters through that perhaps Spud sought to end his life, and people state their disbelief that such a jocular man could be so broken inside, my thoughts turn to my best friend who took his own life in 2005. I'll try to be brief, but there's a need to give as much of the full story as I can without being indulgent. Feel free to scroll down.

TLDR: however bad the pain may be, having to pick up the pieces and live with that weight as a family member has got to be worse.

EDIT: I decided to wipe the first draft of that story, it was too long and it was about a guy who you never knew so I'll keep it brief:

like Spud, my mate - let's call him "Terry" - was a happy man, a people person. He started out as this country kid who was very close to his mum and siblings. He was destined for big things with his talent and charisma and soon became a very cool city boy who had a million friends and girlfriends. Eventually he found himself alone in a foreign country doing a well-paid nest egg gig for a few months and the lifestyle got to him. He was having significant problems with insomnia, relationship problems, work-related injury problems and was dealing with the recent death of his father. He was depressed and a long distance from his friends and family.

He went to see a doctor who prescribed him some medication to combat the insomnia, but what this doctor didn't notice at the time was that in big capitals on the medicinal documentation were words to the effect of DO NOT PRESCRIBE TO SUFFERERS OF DEPRESSION. After around a week on this drug (the name of which I've sadly forgotten), during which his flatmate remembered him being strangely withdrawn and negative, after hanging out alone in a friend's 11th floor apartment for a few hours, he jumped off the balcony onto the street. One of his brothers had to fly half way across the world to identify him and bring his body home. The tattoo on his arm was the first thing he saw. He doesn't talk much about it. His family were devastated, naturally. They'd had a few sad events in a recently short time, that was another. His poor mum had to stay positive, she doesn't know any other way.

No one saw it coming. None of his friends or family. When another mate rang to tell me "Terry's dead" I actually had to ask "Terry who?" even though I didn't know hardly any. If you gave me a list of people I knew and asked me to rank them in order of people most likely to commit suicide, his name would have been near the bottom. He had it all. One of the most successful people I've known.

The pain was there, but in the shadows next to the bright lights of his happiness, laughter and positivity, it was hard to notice. I started wondering afterwards if he'd used that positivity as a mask. Maybe he'd learnt over time that people appreciated him more when he was happy. When he did talk about the emotional toll of a break up with a girl he loved, or his insomnia, or the onset of OCD, I didn't recognise the significance. He did used to whinge about this or that, I sympathised but in hindsight I suppose I brushed it off. I thought he would just roll with it, his life was so excellent, why would you get down about these things? In the end though, it just took a trigger, in the form of legally prescribed medicine from a careless professional.

I'd talked to Terry about a week before the end of his life. I was waiting for a bus in London and I got a call from him to wish me happy birthday. He sounded fine. It was a short convo, London is loud and I couldn't really hear that well. We hadn't been talking that reguarly, nothing bad, just two guys living in two different countries getting on with our lives. I wish I could have picked up something in his voice, some sign.

What's the point of this story? Spud and Terry were such forces of nature, but we never see the other side of that. Spud was recently described by Nathan Burke as a man of passion. We all know that passion can have two sides to it. We see the success and we ignore the other stuff, we never think of what the side effects of that success might be, we never imagine the broken egg inside the beautiful shell.

If someone is reading this and they have a "beautiful life" that is sometimes too much to handle, I want you to know; no one will think less of you for saying so. Remember that you might think that the messages you are sending are clear enough, but those who know you don't know how you are processing your pain. Sometimes we see only what we want; when you need help, be unequivocal. Be real. You don't need to couch everything in jokes or downplay it because you think we won't like this side of you. If our solutions don't help you deal with your pain, tell us. We will be with you. We will navigate those waves together.

RIP Terry RIP Danny Frawley

 

[theprospect]

Still in such shock, have been absolutely flat as anything since it was confirmed yesterday. Couldn't get any work done at the office and only slept for about an hour last night - spent most of it listening to some of Spud's classic Saturday Rub shows with JB, Damo and Gary.

It feels like the death of a close family member, even though I never personally knew him or even met him. But he was such a huge part of the St Kilda family. So fiercely loyal and passionate about the club, my heart breaks for him. To be able to speak so openly about his issues and still be such an immensely positive figure in the media right up until as recent as this past weekend, shows how selfless he was. Cared so much about making sure that everyone else was happy.

I don't want to talk about or speculate the circumstances, I couldn't get it out of my head yesterday wondering what might have led to what happened but that's not fair at all. We're all heartbroken, the St Kilda FC and wider football community all shattered. But I'd much rather remember Danny for the reasons that everyone here loved him so much, rather than for the way his life tragically ended.

He embodied everything it meant to be a St Kilda player. Strength through loyalty is Danny Frawley. The second longest serving captain in the history of the club and a long time spokesperson/advocate for all things St Kilda. Had time for absolutely everybody and you won't find a person who has a single bad word to say about him. As someone mentioned earlier no one was scrapping for positive things to say about him, the funny memories and heartfelt stories are - and I mean this literally, endless.

I'll be making an effort to get down to the club at some stage in the next few days to pay tribute, I hope everyone here is able to cope in such a difficult time. I pray for his family and friends that they have the strength to get through this but they have the entire football community right behind them.

❤

 

[Drake Huggins]

ill always ride it, just hope those around me can ride with me. hard running 2 business , staff, having time for kids and wife, then keeping it together.
sorry to hijack the thread..
cheers mate

Don't apologise, mate. Good on you for reaching out. PM me if there's anything I can do, no matter how small. All the best and keep riding that wave!

 

[Drake Huggins]

you should report the guy anonymously to IBAC

I probsbly will, sammm. Been thinking about it for a long time. I've been doing consulting for local councils and government authorities on IBAC compliance and anti corruption measures.

I've had discussions about it with a trusted colleague. I still have trust issues, having seen the treatment whistleblowers have received. IBAC is full of ex-coppers, some of whom would've worked with him. Still, there is no alternative. What I was told yesterday about his behaviour revived a lot of issues and was probably the last straw for me.

 

[mightymalaka]

Don't apologise, mate. Good on you for reaching out. PM me if there's anything I can do, no matter how small. All the best and keep riding that wave!

Between your good self Drake, Molten Ganglands and Parkers Tatts i would like to concur with Mowman
And say Good on you guys for being brave enough to speak about what so many of us don't want to!

Thank you!

 

[Monkey King]

I'm so upset. no words .....

even though this has not touched me personally as i didn't know Danny personally. Both my mum (who passed away in may) and myself were / are die hard saints.

and between my father dying last year, my uncle dying last year, my mum (who i was real close to) dying in May, this is justjust upset me

I lost my parents one year after the other. Hope you have plenty around to love and support you.

Condolences to all Sainters. I saw a lot of Spud play, as my girlfriend around that time was a Saints supporter and lived not too far from Waverley. Too easy to get on down with sub $5 entry and a nice mini Pizza Hut pizza inside. One of the better fullbacks of his generation was Spud. Never met him but seemed a great person too. Very sad and I’ve felt quite affected by news since I heard it. Tragedy.

 

[Lethality]

Even sadder now that it looks like it was a suicide. Most other problems in our societies are in decline, suicide seems to be getting worse.

 

[Cornish]

Even sadder now that it looks like it was a suicide. Most other problems in our societies are in decline, suicide seems to be getting worse.

Not sure whether its worse or more reported due to social media.

I have lost 4 mates over the years to suicide, they are the ones i know of.

 

[St Kilda Death]

The world lost one of the good guys.
A saints legend.
That's all that's worth saying.

 

[The Punter]

It feels a bit close to home for me because it literally is - I live about 10-15 minutes away from Bungaree and drove through there today on my way to work. I also know the stretch of road where it happened reasonably well, which is probably 5-10 minutes from Bungaree in the Melbourne direction.

My suggestion for a tribute is from the round ball game. Rather than a minute's silence, I suggest at the two minute mark of the second quarter of our first home game next year, we give Danny two minutes applause. Just all St Kilda supporters get to their feet, regardless of what is happening in the match, and clap for two solid minutes.