Roast AFL Management Speak!

[Tony Lynn 15]

Given we have been starved of footy and it is now back I would love to get input from the board on your favourite (perhaps non favourite) footy buzz words and phrases.

I am sure we have all worked in businesses with people that just love to trot certain phrases out. Footy is absolutely rife with them and our former coach was a walking encyclopedia for such words.

I saw the Freo coach on the TV the other day talking about Jessie Hogan from memory. He came out with a current classic.

Apparently Hogan is very much "invested in the program" right now.

In AFL terms I believe this somehow means he is working well with the group and giving his all.

So what other catch phrases either make you giggle or absolutely give you the shits?

 

[Robbo's my hero]

Where do I start?

Weasel words run through every facet of our existence. Now that you’ve flagged it I’ll have an ear out for it.

A particular favourite of mine recently (and I use the term ironically) is the idea that we don’t think about things and consult any longer we ‘harvest’ instead. FMD!

I can’t wait for a coach to use that one.

 

[Tony Lynn 15]

Where do I start?

Weasel words run through every facet of our existence. Now that you’ve flagged it I’ll have an ear out for it.

A particular favourite of mine recently (and I use the term ironically) is the idea that we don’t think about things and consult any longer we ‘harvest’ instead. FMD!

I can’t wait for a coach to use that one.

Why don't we "park that" for a moment.

 

[chunkylover53]

yeah nah yeah people can say what they want kane-o but realistically we only know what goes on inside the 4 walls and the boys are well and truly focused on taking it week-by-week and doing what they can to help the team cheers boys.

 

[thylacine60]

you've admitted you're not that invested in carlton any longer - maybe you need a facebook group or something similar..........

 

[Tony Lynn 15]

you've admitted you're not that invested in carlton any longer - maybe you need a facebook group or something similar..........

Is that a crime?

 

[thylacine60]

facebook groups? mostly.........

 

[Tony Lynn 15]

facebook groups? mostly.........

Having never been on Facebook I will have to take your word for it.

 

[thylacine60]

that's two of us, great thread though........

 

[Tony Lynn 15]

that's two of us, great thread though........

Gee you are an interesting bloke mate.

 

[Robbo's my hero]

Come on thylacine60 you’ve only ever wanted to be an administrator. We know Aphrodite is the sheriff and there’s only room for one sheriff in this town.

 

[thylacine60]

Fun fact I have no idea who put that there.

 

[VeinGlorious]

As far as AFL management speak goes, Travis Cloke stands out as possibly the most eloquent, intelligent footy player i can remember. He is the proud owner of this phrase, and it literally encapsulates everything that is great in the world of management speak.

“Adelaide have come out and said it’s going to be a low-scoring game, so they’re pretty straight to the word.
They don’t talk a lot of smoke and shadows behind the windows.”

Glorious.

 

[Kilroy]

More Confuscius than office-speak but you gotta love the pretentiousness of Old Mick.

"The ox is slow but the earth is patient"

 

[Rosscoe]

"keep your end up" is the OG to "play your role".

 

[LanceRomance]

"keep your end up" is the OG to "play your role".

Means something else in the locker room


I hate the sentence structure...
"he is a great kick is *insert footballers* name"

 

[Tony Lynn 15]

This one isn't a saying but it is really starting to get up my nose.

The whole "we need to look relaxed and be laughing" fad.

I am pretty sure it stemmed from when Richmond won the flag a few years back. Now I see a lot of clubs when they do their final huddle before the bounce laughing and telling jokes. The Hawks were doing it the other night.

Really ******* annoying.

 

[VeinGlorious]

This one isn't a saying but it is really starting to get up my nose.

The whole "we need to look relaxed and be laughing" fad.

I am pretty sure it stemmed from when Richmond won the flag a few years back. Now I see a lot of clubs when they do their final huddle before the bounce laughing and telling jokes. The Hawks were doing it the other night.

Really ******* annoying.

That’s reprehensible. Who the * do these people think they are?!

 

[Kilroy]

Every single thing Simon Goodwin says is ...

 

[Rosscoe]

Means something else in the locker room


I hate the sentence structure...
"he is a great kick is *insert footballers* name"

what in the locker room with all the champions...

 

[VeinGlorious]

 

[Robbo's my hero]

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Clarko bending the English language into a previously unheard of state.

 

[Jabba73]

Pretty much anything out of Gil’s mouth

 

[Broadside]

I still have NFI what a kick to the fat side of the ground is.

 

[Kilroy]

How did we ever get by before there were any "stoppages"?