Preview * * * FAEC FOF BOMBRES V CORWS * * * Friday 9/7/21 @ 7pm at Marvel

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Nov 24, 2007
25,849
54,730
DTC Frat House
AFL Club
Adelaide
Other Teams
Team Lambda Variant
So it’s come to this

FAEC FOF BOMBRES V CROMS

1F1A02CA-4A18-48FD-9006-B937855D666A.jpeg


First, let me show you this astonishing panorama of the end times, and the heart of the pandemonium of the sun




Adelaide Crows v Essendrug Bombres

Okay miscreants, first let’s get a real sense of where they are and look back to get a better understanding of where the clubs started.

0ACBC7C9-9883-4CAD-B9E5-80C045B08BD7.png


Righto, a quick decade of history:

2012: Essendon first busted for TB4, Watson wins Brownlow
2013: everyone resigns, $2m fine, loss of draft picks, kicked out of finals
2014: Bomber Thompson becomes coach, presumably Hird is shocked to be sitting there
2015: 34 Essendon players are investigated. Hird returns to coach. Hird resigns again and Worsfold becomes coach.
2016: all the Essendon players are suspended. They field a secondary team and come last, receiving the #1 draft pick. Of course.

BB1FF6CA-5EBC-42F9-B387-57EBE0DEA832.png

2017: they just plain suck for a while.
2018: Bomber convicted of drug possession.
2019: meh, it’s the Bombers.
2020: Ben Rutten becomes coach.
2021: they look like this

https://www.footywire.com/afl/footy/tg-essendon-bombers

So, they’re at 6-9 with 98.73%. Note well, three of those losses were by 1 (Hawks), 2 (Giants) and 3 points (Swans) [ha ha]. They could easily be ensconced in the bottom half of the 8 with a 9-6 record instead. Actually, they’d be 6th! The rest of their wins and losses have been much larger, indicating a team still trying to find consistency. They’re going to be one those “next year” teams; the onus will be on them to continue their improvement without losing the players causing that improvement. Barring stupidity they’ll make the 8 next year.

Some players doing well?

7CE83691-22BE-450C-8A57-682B3DC96192.jpeg

this is Darcy Parish, who is in his 6th season, and has played 100 games. Finally being played in his correct position, he’s shining
Darcy Parish, finally moved to the midfield, wow. Having a bumper year. Andrew McGrath pre-injury was steadily improving; Jordan Ridley out of nowhere to marshall the back line and win the B&F; scoring wise, it’s McDonald-Tipungwuti with 31.12 from 15 games; and Cale Hooker of all people kicking 30.17 from 15 leaving Jake Stringer with 24.13 from 11. Is that enough? Not yet. Hooker’s getting on but DABM’s favourite player Peter Wright is waiting to slot in to that forward line, because he should be a ruckman. In serious, they need some tall forwards. Hell, they need *everything*. Did you know Nik Cox is 200cm tall? I guess they’re halfway there, because they’re halfway up the ladder.

So, while we usually laugh at CarLOLton or one of the other basement dwellers, Essendrug have quietly reconstructed their list. It still sucks, but hey. They’re not in year 20 of a rebuild either. Having 3 top ten picks last year would have helped, I wonder how they pulled that off. Must have been like us for Gibbs.

Here’s a song about the number of days since they won a final



Who will win? Hopefully them.

Let them charge to 9th. It’s time for our team to gel and run kids through the middle... we’re treading water for the next season and a half.

Team goals:
- Identify players to keep
- Identify players to trade
God, I’d love one more first round pick this year.

Also, Morono, I mean Dodoro. If he’s so good why haven’t they won a final since September 4th, 2004.

https://www.onthisday.com/date/2004/september/4

It’s so long ago, the only notable thing I could glean was the release of the film “Finding Neverland”. No, not the Michael Jackson is a pedo doc. I made this meme to help you remember:

FF7C3C42-D67F-4E82-9A92-FE54A4B7D9AD.jpeg


I’ve just had a look at their list and it’s kinda uninspiring... feels to me like a bunch of B graders that nearly broke through but didn’t. What happened to Heppell? Smith? Shiel? Hooker? (before this season?).

They’ve got Stringer to exclaim wildly about, and Francis / Parish / McGrath coming on, but it feels like they’ll be treading water. Not good enough to make it to the 8 where anything can happen, not bad enough to get multiple high draft picks. But hey I’ve been wrong before, almost constantly.

Whereas Adelaide... yeah we know. We can see where we’re supposed to be going.

E37937DA-C827-4E57-9F66-E620C42E5B92.gif


So, the final result?

Is the game on? I don’t know.

Where’s the game? I don’t know. Holy cow, Marvel! Rumour is it‘s Friday night.

Are we all going to die from climate change? Yes, if the oceans are on fire. I suspect instead the poor will simply be allowed the privilege of dying off... as always, the rich get richer, the poor get the picture, and the rest will continue blindly walking off a cliff.

Look it’s hoo not ideal. The Bombres are one of those groups of people I don’t care much about, like Tories and Seppos. Did you know Nik Cox is 200cm tall? In my opinion, they improved enough list wise to stay the same place.

They should beat us, Norf, Suns, Woods and *maybe* the Giants, to end the season about 11-11... nearing relevancy, but ultimately nada, and lots of pundits proclaiming next year is the year...

Hey, if they don’t make the finals, then theoretically they won’t make finals until Friday September 2, 2022. Does this mean next year’s draft period, they’ll be taking kids that haven’t been alive since they last won a final?

Okay, I actually googled* the rules:

“AFL rules stipulate players must be at least 18 on December 31 in the year they are drafted to be eligible for selection by clubs.”

So, theoretically, we want someone old enough to be drafted, but young enough to have never seen them win a final.

The youngest someone to fit that criteria would be 18 on 31/12/2022.

So, if they were born in late 2004, and were decidedly average, Essendrug could draft a kid who wasn’t alive last time they won a final. Fingers crossed!

What I want too see: bigger minutes for our kids. There’s not much we can do but expose them to challenges and wait for them to grow. I’m seeing lots of encouraging signs. If only we’d blooded them organically blah blah blah Etc.

Ben Rutten

We all love Ben. 3 goals with his first 3 kicks in footy! Then retirement in 2014, 4 years as Richmond’s defensive coach, then head coach at Bombers. A premiership as an assistant coach and a quick apprenticeship. I guess he was mentored by the best.

461D01E3-1D9C-4F81-9C13-CCBF5472698A.jpeg

will this guy ever shut up?

Match Conditions:

Fun for everyone!

BDDA7C49-5DF7-4C46-974C-2C14D54D480E.png


Other strange conditions, I’m in rehab and using mild-altering medications, so as far as I know this lady is on an Australian-wide killing spree

C66AE0A1-239C-4233-99E6-FB71FE02BCFF.jpeg


let’s hope, like David “Mad Dog” MacKay, she was stopped.

Did you know Nik Cox is 200cm tall?

And lastly, that’s 25,000 posts of meaningless dribble. A milestone to be celebrated. I joined this dumpster fire in November 2007 so it’s not far off 5,000 days - so maybe 5 posts a day? It’s truly a testament to time-wasting. But you’re all great people. Well, you’re okay. Well, I‘d cross the street if I saw you coming. Here’s to much more 👍

*remember when Google’s motto was, “don’t be evil”. Ha, that worked.



bonus content

in consultation with my publisher, she’s recommended I print a short excerpt from my upcoming debut novel, “The Animal We Built Ourselves”, so I’ve included it below. This is the opening. There’s another 30,000 words after this and I’m a third in. If you’d like a copy when I’m done, yell out and I’ll be surprised.

Tem wasn’t expecting a message.

He’d woken up slowly, nestled in the cloudbed, and allowed his eyes to adjust for a moment as he began yawning, violently sucking in the recycled air. Sensing he was awake the room began to brighten, but Tem said no, and the lights reversed and dimmed back as fast as they had come on. He lay there comfortably til he felt awake enough, then reluctantly swung his legs over the side. The floor was warm to touch on his rough feet, and he gingerly stood to make his way to the bathroom. The cabin was tiny – small enough that physicists would discuss it in Planck lengths – but it had the basics and a view outside, so her considered himself lucky. It wasn’t more than a bed and a bathroom, but what else did he need? He hadn’t come so that he could spend time inside a sardine can, there was too much else he could do. And if he finally bored of the amusements aboard the liner, or needed time away from the passengers, he had a refuge here. He’d failed to sleep in far worse places, colder, hotter, louder, smellier, brighter, lumpier, uneven, more uncomfortable, more exposed, and certainly far more dangerous than this, though maybe not as claustrophobic. Tem had come to believe perspective was a great way of dealing with disappointments, which he concluded was also why the cabin was so cheap. The room was a good size, for him. It wasn’t big – certainly not enormous, like one of the grand suites with a balcony, kitchenette, entertaining area, priority embarkation, complimentary laundry, and all the other things he couldn’t remember that had been packed into the admittedly snazzy brochure. His room (a Partial Spaceview, being the second cheapest room available, or at least the cheapest room with any kind of view) filled his basic needs – a foam bed that was soft, a bathroom that was clean, and an entertainment wall if he felt like staying in and unwinding. The colour scheme was basic; he’d already tried cycling through a few colours and settled on what the system called duck egg blue, after leaving it rotating in a kaleidoscope pattern had disorientated him quickly. Facilities were basic too, but you didn’t need much. Who goes on a cruise ship and stays in their room? As far as he was concerned, he’d only be resting here, preparing himself for fun and relaxation outside the room. In any case it was big enough for him, and it was his, and he would not be disturbed on this, his well-earned vacation.

So far he’d spent a day at the spa, being massaged endlessly, then steam-roomed, drugged, zapped, sensory-deprivation-flotation-tanked and sweated again, all the while breathing curious vapours and drinking electrolytic fluids until he floated out of the room and slept like he’d been knocked out. He’d enjoyed the restaurants, eaten exotic foods he’d always wanted to try (although the beef – real beef – with potato au gratin was out of his price range) in a delicious ambience that had brought him more undone, knowing he had time to taste the food, rather than just chew and swallow (he forced himself to put down the cutlery between bites). He’d spent a day at the pool, swimming laps, floating around, then had climbed out and laid on a deckchair for an hour. Not knowing what else to do, he’d gone back into the pool, swum a few more laps, then gotten out and repeated the process. Attendant robots regularly brought out all manner of drinks for him, til by the end navigating the pool was easier than walking unaided on the deck. He’d tried the casinos, the game arenas. Last night he’d gone dancing. He was still tired, but it wasn’t the mentally and physically exhausted kind of tired he got from his work, where he’d return to his tiny apartment on the 119th floor after a job and collapse onto the couch, his mind full and body shot. This was exhaustion from relaxation. Tem was finally unwinding, allowing himself to forget, giving himself a rest. A vacation! He’d wanted to take this cruise a long time.
 
Last edited:
So it’s come to this

FAEC FOF BOMBRES V CROMS

View attachment 1170188

First, let me show you this astonishing panorama of the end times



and the heart of the pandemonium of the sun




Adelaide Crows v Essendrug Bombres

Okay miscreants, first let’s get a real sense of where they are and look back to get a better understanding of where the clubs started.

View attachment 1170192

Righto, a quick decade of history:

2012: Essendon first busted for TB4, Watson wins Brownlow
2013: everyone resigns, $2m fine, loss of draft picks, kicked out of finals
2014: Bomber Thompson becomes coach, presumably Hird is shocked to be sitting there
2015: 34 Essendon players are investigated. Hird returns to coach. Hird resigns again and Worsfold becomes coach.
2016: all the Essendon players are suspended. They field a secondary team and come last, receiving the #1 draft pick. Of course.

View attachment 1170248
2017: they just plain suck for a while.
2018: Bomber convicted of drug possession.
2019: meh, it’s the Bombers.
2020: Ben Rutten becomes coach.
2021: they look like this

https://www.footywire.com/afl/footy/tg-essendon-bombers

So, they’re at 6-9 with 98.73%. Note well, three of those losses were by 1 (Hawks), 2 (Giants) and 3 points (Swans) [ha ha]. They could easily be ensconced in the bottom half of the 8 with a 9-6 record instead. Actually, they’d be 6th! The rest of their wins and losses have been much larger, indicating a team still trying to find consistency. They’re going to be one those “next year” teams; the onus will be on them to continue their improvement without losing the players causing that improvement. Barring stupidity they’ll make the 8 next year.

Some players doing well?

View attachment 1170201
this is Darcy Parish, who is in his 6th season, and has played 100 games. Finally being played in his correct position, he’s shining
Darcy Parish, finally moved to the midfield, wow. Having a bumper year. Andrew McGrath pre-injury was steadily improving; Jordan Ridley out of nowhere to marshall the back line and win the B&F; scoring wise, it’s McDonald-Tipungwuti with 31.12 from 15 games; and Cale Hooker of all people kicking 30.17 from 15 leaving Jake Stringer with 24.13 from 11. Is that enough? Not yet. Hooker’s getting on but DABM’s favourite player Peter Wright is waiting to slot in to that forward line, because he should be a ruckman. In serious, they need some tall forwards. Hell, they need *everything*. Did you know Nik Cox is 200cm tall? I guess they’re halfway there, because they’re halfway up the ladder.

So, while we usually laugh at CarLOLton or one of the other basement dwellers, Essendrug have quietly reconstructed their list. It still sucks, but hey. They’re not in year 20 of a rebuild either. Having 3 top ten picks last year would have helped, I wonder how they pulled that off. Must have been like us for Gibbs.

Here’s a song about the number of days since they won a final



Who will win? Hopefully them.

Let them charge to 9th. It’s time for our team to gel and run kids through the middle... we’re treading water for the next season and a half.

Team goals:
- Identify players to keep
- Identify players to trade
God, I’d love one more first round pick this year.

Also, Morono, I mean Dodoro. If he’s so good why haven’t they won a final since September 4th, 2004.

https://www.onthisday.com/date/2004/september/4

It’s so long ago, the only notable thing I could glean was the release of the film “Finding Neverland”. No, not the Michael Jackson is a pedo doc. I made this meme to help you remember:

View attachment 1170209

I’ve just had a look at their list and it’s kinda uninspiring... feels to me like a bunch of B graders that nearly broke through but didn’t. What happened to Heppell? Smith? Shiel? Hooker? (before this season?).

They’ve got Stringer to exclaim wildly about, and Francis / Parish / McGrath coming on, but it feels like they’ll be treading water. Not good enough to make it to the 8 where anything can happen, not bad enough to get multiple high draft picks. But hey I’ve been wrong before, almost constantly.

Whereas Adelaide... yeah we know. We can see where we’re supposed to be going.

View attachment 1170318

So, the final result?

Is the game on? I don’t know.

Where’s the game? I don’t know. Holy cow, Marvel! Rumour is it‘s Friday night.

Are we all going to die from climate change? Yes, if the oceans are on fire. I suspect instead the poor will simply be allowed the privilege of dying off... as always, the rich get richer, the poor get the picture, and the rest will continue blindly walking off a cliff.

Look it’s hoo not ideal. The Bombres are one of those groups of people I don’t care much about, like Tories and Seppos. Did you know Nik Cox is 200cm tall? In my opinion, they improved enough list wise to stay the same place.

They should beat us, Norf, Suns, Woods and *maybe* the Giants, to end the season about 11-11... nearing relevancy, but ultimately nada, and lots of pundits proclaiming next year is the year...

Hey, if they don’t make the finals, then theoretically they won’t make finals until Friday September 2, 2022. Does this mean next year’s draft period, they’ll be taking kids that haven’t been alive since they last won a final?

Okay, I actually googled* the rules:

“AFL rules stipulate players must be at least 18 on December 31 in the year they are drafted to be eligible for selection by clubs.”

So, theoretically, we want someone old enough to be drafted, but young enough to have never seen them win a final.

The youngest someone to fit that criteria would be 18 on 31/12/2022.

So, if they were born in late 2004, and were decidedly average, Essendrug could draft a kid who wasn’t alive last time they won a final. Fingers crossed!

What I want too see: bigger minutes for our kids. There’s not much we can do but expose them to challenges and wait for them to grow. I’m seeing lots of encouraging signs. If only we’d blooded them organically blah blah blah Etc.

Ben Rutten

We all love Ben. 3 goals with his first 3 kicks in footy! Then retirement in 2014, 4 years as Richmond’s defensive coach, then head coach at Bombers. A premiership as an assistant coach and a quick apprenticeship. I guess he was mentored by the best.

View attachment 1170237
will this guy ever shut up?

Match Conditions:

Fun for everyone!

View attachment 1170245

Other strange conditions, I’m in rehab and using mild-altering medications, so as far as I know this lady is on an Australian-wide killing spree

View attachment 1170294

let’s hope, like David “Mad Dog” MacKay, she was stopped.

Did you know Nik Cox is 200cm tall?

And lastly, that’s 25,000 posts of meaningless dribble. A milestone to be celebrated. I joined this dumpster fire in November 2007 so it’s not far off 5,000 days - so maybe 5 posts a day? It’s truly a testament to time-wasting. But you’re all great people. Well, you’re okay. Well, I‘d cross the street if I saw you coming. Here’s to much more 👍

*remember when Google’s motto was, “don’t be evil”. Ha, that worked.



bonus content

in consultation with my publisher, she’s recommended I print a short excerpt from my upcoming debut novel, “The Animal We Built Ourselves”, so I’ve included it below. This is the opening. There’s another 30,000 words after this and I’m a third in. If you’d like a copy when I’m done, yell out and I’ll be surprised.

Tem wasn’t expecting a message.

He’d woken up slowly, nestled in the cloudbed, and allowed his eyes to adjust for a moment as he began yawning, violently sucking in the recycled air. Sensing he was awake the room began to brighten, but Tem said no, and the lights reversed and dimmed back as fast as they had come on. He lay there comfortably til he felt awake enough, then reluctantly swung his legs over the side. The floor was warm to touch on his rough feet, and he gingerly stood to make his way to the bathroom. The cabin was tiny – small enough that physicists would discuss it in Planck lengths – but it had the basics and a view outside, so her considered himself lucky. It wasn’t more than a bed and a bathroom, but what else did he need? He hadn’t come so that he could spend time inside a sardine can, there was too much else he could do. And if he finally bored of the amusements aboard the liner, or needed time away from the passengers, he had a refuge here. He’d failed to sleep in far worse places, colder, hotter, louder, smellier, brighter, lumpier, uneven, more uncomfortable, more exposed, and certainly far more dangerous than this, though maybe not as claustrophobic. Tem had come to believe perspective was a great way of dealing with disappointments, which he concluded was also why the cabin was so cheap. The room was a good size, for him. It wasn’t big – certainly not enormous, like one of the grand suites with a balcony, kitchenette, entertaining area, priority embarkation, complimentary laundry, and all the other things he couldn’t remember that had been packed into the admittedly snazzy brochure. His room (a Partial Spaceview, being the second cheapest room available, or at least the cheapest room with any kind of view) filled his basic needs – a foam bed that was soft, a bathroom that was clean, and an entertainment wall if he felt like staying in and unwinding. The colour scheme was basic; he’d already tried cycling through a few colours and settled on what the system called duck egg blue, after leaving it rotating in a kaleidoscope pattern had disorientated him quickly. Facilities were basic too, but you didn’t need much. Who goes on a cruise ship and stays in their room? As far as he was concerned, he’d only be resting here, preparing himself for fun and relaxation outside the room. In any case it was big enough for him, and it was his, and he would not be disturbed on this, his well-earned vacation.

So far he’d spent a day at the spa, being massaged endlessly, then steam-roomed, drugged, zapped, sensory-deprivation-flotation-tanked and sweated again, all the while breathing curious vapours and drinking electrolytic fluids until he floated out of the room and slept like he’d been knocked out. He’d enjoyed the restaurants, eaten exotic foods he’d always wanted to try (although the beef – real beef – with potato au gratin was out of his price range) in a delicious ambience that had brought him more undone, knowing he had time to taste the food, rather than just chew and swallow (he forced himself to put down the cutlery between bites). He’d spent a day at the pool, swimming laps, floating around, then had climbed out and laid on a deckchair for an hour. Not knowing what else to do, he’d gone back into the pool, swum a few more laps, then gotten out and repeated the process. Attendant robots regularly brought out all manner of drinks for him, til by the end navigating the pool was easier than walking unaided on the deck. He’d tried the casinos, the game arenas. Last night he’d gone dancing. He was still tired, but it wasn’t the mentally and physically exhausted kind of tired he got from his work, where he’d return to his tiny apartment on the 119th floor after a job and collapse onto the couch, his mind full and body shot. This was exhaustion from relaxation. Tem was finally unwinding, allowing himself to forget, giving himself a rest. A vacation! He’d wanted to take this cruise a long time.


Marvellous!
1622370578619.gif
 

Log in to remove this ad.

How long can you sit on your hands so as to not ruin the perfect 25,000 posts milestone?

MOD NOTE: apparently I can alter other posts and it doesn‘t count, so I’d think a long time

MOD NOTE 2: infracting people counts as a post...
 
Last edited by a moderator:

Betts are off

Norm Smith Medallist
Sep 28, 2016
9,796
19,253
AFL Club
Adelaide
So it’s come to this

FAEC FOF BOMBRES V CROMS

View attachment 1170188

First, let me show you this astonishing panorama of the end times, and the heart of the pandemonium of the sun




Adelaide Crows v Essendrug Bombres

Okay miscreants, first let’s get a real sense of where they are and look back to get a better understanding of where the clubs started.

View attachment 1170192

Righto, a quick decade of history:

2012: Essendon first busted for TB4, Watson wins Brownlow
2013: everyone resigns, $2m fine, loss of draft picks, kicked out of finals
2014: Bomber Thompson becomes coach, presumably Hird is shocked to be sitting there
2015: 34 Essendon players are investigated. Hird returns to coach. Hird resigns again and Worsfold becomes coach.
2016: all the Essendon players are suspended. They field a secondary team and come last, receiving the #1 draft pick. Of course.

View attachment 1170248
2017: they just plain suck for a while.
2018: Bomber convicted of drug possession.
2019: meh, it’s the Bombers.
2020: Ben Rutten becomes coach.
2021: they look like this

https://www.footywire.com/afl/footy/tg-essendon-bombers

So, they’re at 6-9 with 98.73%. Note well, three of those losses were by 1 (Hawks), 2 (Giants) and 3 points (Swans) [ha ha]. They could easily be ensconced in the bottom half of the 8 with a 9-6 record instead. Actually, they’d be 6th! The rest of their wins and losses have been much larger, indicating a team still trying to find consistency. They’re going to be one those “next year” teams; the onus will be on them to continue their improvement without losing the players causing that improvement. Barring stupidity they’ll make the 8 next year.

Some players doing well?

View attachment 1170201
this is Darcy Parish, who is in his 6th season, and has played 100 games. Finally being played in his correct position, he’s shining
Darcy Parish, finally moved to the midfield, wow. Having a bumper year. Andrew McGrath pre-injury was steadily improving; Jordan Ridley out of nowhere to marshall the back line and win the B&F; scoring wise, it’s McDonald-Tipungwuti with 31.12 from 15 games; and Cale Hooker of all people kicking 30.17 from 15 leaving Jake Stringer with 24.13 from 11. Is that enough? Not yet. Hooker’s getting on but DABM’s favourite player Peter Wright is waiting to slot in to that forward line, because he should be a ruckman. In serious, they need some tall forwards. Hell, they need *everything*. Did you know Nik Cox is 200cm tall? I guess they’re halfway there, because they’re halfway up the ladder.

So, while we usually laugh at CarLOLton or one of the other basement dwellers, Essendrug have quietly reconstructed their list. It still sucks, but hey. They’re not in year 20 of a rebuild either. Having 3 top ten picks last year would have helped, I wonder how they pulled that off. Must have been like us for Gibbs.

Here’s a song about the number of days since they won a final



Who will win? Hopefully them.

Let them charge to 9th. It’s time for our team to gel and run kids through the middle... we’re treading water for the next season and a half.

Team goals:
- Identify players to keep
- Identify players to trade
God, I’d love one more first round pick this year.

Also, Morono, I mean Dodoro. If he’s so good why haven’t they won a final since September 4th, 2004.

https://www.onthisday.com/date/2004/september/4

It’s so long ago, the only notable thing I could glean was the release of the film “Finding Neverland”. No, not the Michael Jackson is a pedo doc. I made this meme to help you remember:

View attachment 1170209

I’ve just had a look at their list and it’s kinda uninspiring... feels to me like a bunch of B graders that nearly broke through but didn’t. What happened to Heppell? Smith? Shiel? Hooker? (before this season?).

They’ve got Stringer to exclaim wildly about, and Francis / Parish / McGrath coming on, but it feels like they’ll be treading water. Not good enough to make it to the 8 where anything can happen, not bad enough to get multiple high draft picks. But hey I’ve been wrong before, almost constantly.

Whereas Adelaide... yeah we know. We can see where we’re supposed to be going.

View attachment 1170318

So, the final result?

Is the game on? I don’t know.

Where’s the game? I don’t know. Holy cow, Marvel! Rumour is it‘s Friday night.

Are we all going to die from climate change? Yes, if the oceans are on fire. I suspect instead the poor will simply be allowed the privilege of dying off... as always, the rich get richer, the poor get the picture, and the rest will continue blindly walking off a cliff.

Look it’s hoo not ideal. The Bombres are one of those groups of people I don’t care much about, like Tories and Seppos. Did you know Nik Cox is 200cm tall? In my opinion, they improved enough list wise to stay the same place.

They should beat us, Norf, Suns, Woods and *maybe* the Giants, to end the season about 11-11... nearing relevancy, but ultimately nada, and lots of pundits proclaiming next year is the year...

Hey, if they don’t make the finals, then theoretically they won’t make finals until Friday September 2, 2022. Does this mean next year’s draft period, they’ll be taking kids that haven’t been alive since they last won a final?

Okay, I actually googled* the rules:

“AFL rules stipulate players must be at least 18 on December 31 in the year they are drafted to be eligible for selection by clubs.”

So, theoretically, we want someone old enough to be drafted, but young enough to have never seen them win a final.

The youngest someone to fit that criteria would be 18 on 31/12/2022.

So, if they were born in late 2004, and were decidedly average, Essendrug could draft a kid who wasn’t alive last time they won a final. Fingers crossed!

What I want too see: bigger minutes for our kids. There’s not much we can do but expose them to challenges and wait for them to grow. I’m seeing lots of encouraging signs. If only we’d blooded them organically blah blah blah Etc.

Ben Rutten

We all love Ben. 3 goals with his first 3 kicks in footy! Then retirement in 2014, 4 years as Richmond’s defensive coach, then head coach at Bombers. A premiership as an assistant coach and a quick apprenticeship. I guess he was mentored by the best.

View attachment 1170237
will this guy ever shut up?

Match Conditions:

Fun for everyone!

View attachment 1170245

Other strange conditions, I’m in rehab and using mild-altering medications, so as far as I know this lady is on an Australian-wide killing spree

View attachment 1170294

let’s hope, like David “Mad Dog” MacKay, she was stopped.

Did you know Nik Cox is 200cm tall?

And lastly, that’s 25,000 posts of meaningless dribble. A milestone to be celebrated. I joined this dumpster fire in November 2007 so it’s not far off 5,000 days - so maybe 5 posts a day? It’s truly a testament to time-wasting. But you’re all great people. Well, you’re okay. Well, I‘d cross the street if I saw you coming. Here’s to much more 👍

*remember when Google’s motto was, “don’t be evil”. Ha, that worked.



bonus content

in consultation with my publisher, she’s recommended I print a short excerpt from my upcoming debut novel, “The Animal We Built Ourselves”, so I’ve included it below. This is the opening. There’s another 30,000 words after this and I’m a third in. If you’d like a copy when I’m done, yell out and I’ll be surprised.

Tem wasn’t expecting a message.

He’d woken up slowly, nestled in the cloudbed, and allowed his eyes to adjust for a moment as he began yawning, violently sucking in the recycled air. Sensing he was awake the room began to brighten, but Tem said no, and the lights reversed and dimmed back as fast as they had come on. He lay there comfortably til he felt awake enough, then reluctantly swung his legs over the side. The floor was warm to touch on his rough feet, and he gingerly stood to make his way to the bathroom. The cabin was tiny – small enough that physicists would discuss it in Planck lengths – but it had the basics and a view outside, so her considered himself lucky. It wasn’t more than a bed and a bathroom, but what else did he need? He hadn’t come so that he could spend time inside a sardine can, there was too much else he could do. And if he finally bored of the amusements aboard the liner, or needed time away from the passengers, he had a refuge here. He’d failed to sleep in far worse places, colder, hotter, louder, smellier, brighter, lumpier, uneven, more uncomfortable, more exposed, and certainly far more dangerous than this, though maybe not as claustrophobic. Tem had come to believe perspective was a great way of dealing with disappointments, which he concluded was also why the cabin was so cheap. The room was a good size, for him. It wasn’t big – certainly not enormous, like one of the grand suites with a balcony, kitchenette, entertaining area, priority embarkation, complimentary laundry, and all the other things he couldn’t remember that had been packed into the admittedly snazzy brochure. His room (a Partial Spaceview, being the second cheapest room available, or at least the cheapest room with any kind of view) filled his basic needs – a foam bed that was soft, a bathroom that was clean, and an entertainment wall if he felt like staying in and unwinding. The colour scheme was basic; he’d already tried cycling through a few colours and settled on what the system called duck egg blue, after leaving it rotating in a kaleidoscope pattern had disorientated him quickly. Facilities were basic too, but you didn’t need much. Who goes on a cruise ship and stays in their room? As far as he was concerned, he’d only be resting here, preparing himself for fun and relaxation outside the room. In any case it was big enough for him, and it was his, and he would not be disturbed on this, his well-earned vacation.

So far he’d spent a day at the spa, being massaged endlessly, then steam-roomed, drugged, zapped, sensory-deprivation-flotation-tanked and sweated again, all the while breathing curious vapours and drinking electrolytic fluids until he floated out of the room and slept like he’d been knocked out. He’d enjoyed the restaurants, eaten exotic foods he’d always wanted to try (although the beef – real beef – with potato au gratin was out of his price range) in a delicious ambience that had brought him more undone, knowing he had time to taste the food, rather than just chew and swallow (he forced himself to put down the cutlery between bites). He’d spent a day at the pool, swimming laps, floating around, then had climbed out and laid on a deckchair for an hour. Not knowing what else to do, he’d gone back into the pool, swum a few more laps, then gotten out and repeated the process. Attendant robots regularly brought out all manner of drinks for him, til by the end navigating the pool was easier than walking unaided on the deck. He’d tried the casinos, the game arenas. Last night he’d gone dancing. He was still tired, but it wasn’t the mentally and physically exhausted kind of tired he got from his work, where he’d return to his tiny apartment on the 119th floor after a job and collapse onto the couch, his mind full and body shot. This was exhaustion from relaxation. Tem was finally unwinding, allowing himself to forget, giving himself a rest. A vacation! He’d wanted to take this cruise a long time.

But the thing about Nik Cox is, he's 200cm tall
 
Nov 24, 2007
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Great stuff, D, but the poor won't be allowed to die off. Without the poor there ain't no rich.
Oh, and no one has a 200cm cox.

well, not *all* of them

I’m not sure who to tip
 

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Nov 24, 2007
25,849
54,730
DTC Frat House
AFL Club
Adelaide
Other Teams
Team Lambda Variant
I particularly liked how he lived on the 119th floor….. ;)

placeholder numbers as Easter eggs 😂

and last name is Temeraire, named for the mustard, I later learned about the painting, which I took as divine Providence

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