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So after relieving myself over porcelain, I did what any hygienic person does and wash hands, turn around, and up on the wall behind me is
I Declare Lizard GIF

I mean, not exactly, but a garden skink which is basically the above, but black and about 100mm long.

My first though being "how TF did you get lost in here fella?"
My second thought being "now how am I going to transit you back outside"
Seemingly the lizards first thought "warm body temp, Ima jump"

So as I'm pondering how to get him off the wall without frightening him, he leaps off said wall right on the top of my head, does like a couple rounds on the spot and I'm thankful they're both tiny and not venomous in the slightest so get to effectively walk outside in pitch darkness and faceplant the ground so he can get off my head.

Do you think he moved?

Warm blooded equated to "this is a rock, I'm comfy, where's lunch" for him, so there I am on my knees face resting on the ground, and he just climbs to the back of my head and chills.

Long story short, ended in cussing and he got bitchslapped onto the ground and my neck has a nice red rash now. At least I think it was a he, I better not have been shagged by damn lizard...
 
So after relieving myself over porcelain, I did what any hygienic person does and wash hands, turn around, and up on the wall behind me is
I Declare Lizard GIF

I mean, not exactly, but a garden skink which is basically the above, but black and about 100mm long.

My first though being "how TF did you get lost in here fella?"
My second thought being "now how am I going to transit you back outside"
Seemingly the lizards first thought "warm body temp, Ima jump"

So as I'm pondering how to get him off the wall without frightening him, he leaps off said wall right on the top of my head, does like a couple rounds on the spot and I'm thankful they're both tiny and not venomous in the slightest so get to effectively walk outside in pitch darkness and faceplant the ground so he can get off my head.

Do you think he moved?

Warm blooded equated to "this is a rock, I'm comfy, where's lunch" for him, so there I am on my knees face resting on the ground, and he just climbs to the back of my head and chills.

Long story short, ended in cussing and he got bitchslapped onto the ground and my neck has a nice red rash now. At least I think it was a he, I better not have been shagged by damn lizard...
Lucky it wasn't one of these , you might have been sending pictures of yourself in the wedding dress.

screen-shot-2015-12-04-at-14255-pm.png


We shall refer to you as Lizard Bitch in future.
 
So after relieving myself over porcelain, I did what any hygienic person does and wash hands, turn around, and up on the wall behind me is
I Declare Lizard GIF

I mean, not exactly, but a garden skink which is basically the above, but black and about 100mm long.

My first though being "how TF did you get lost in here fella?"
My second thought being "now how am I going to transit you back outside"
Seemingly the lizards first thought "warm body temp, Ima jump"

So as I'm pondering how to get him off the wall without frightening him, he leaps off said wall right on the top of my head, does like a couple rounds on the spot and I'm thankful they're both tiny and not venomous in the slightest so get to effectively walk outside in pitch darkness and faceplant the ground so he can get off my head.

Do you think he moved?

Warm blooded equated to "this is a rock, I'm comfy, where's lunch" for him, so there I am on my knees face resting on the ground, and he just climbs to the back of my head and chills.

Long story short, ended in cussing and he got bitchslapped onto the ground and my neck has a nice red rash now. At least I think it was a he, I better not have been shagged by damn lizard...


I found a gecko in my yard in Caulfield and thought I'd discovered a new species and sent a pic in an email to the museum. I got a terse reply suggesting that google would have had plenty of information on geckos in vic. If it was on a wall it was probably one of those.
 
Lucky it wasn't one of these , you might have been sending pictures of yourself in the wedding dress.

screen-shot-2015-12-04-at-14255-pm.png


We shall refer to you as Lizard Bitch in future.


We have those come and eat s**t you don't put away down in Gippsland.
 
I found a gecko in my yard in Caulfield and thought I'd discovered a new species and sent a pic in an email to the museum. I got a terse reply suggesting that google would have had plenty of information on geckos in vic. If it was on a wall it was probably one of those.
New species he reckons Dard Ball Get PoppedCorn
 

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I found a gecko in my yard in Caulfield and thought I'd discovered a new species and sent a pic in an email to the museum. I got a terse reply suggesting that google would have had plenty of information on geckos in vic. If it was on a wall it was probably one of those.
Bloody hell gringo did you never see them running around when you were in Elwood. I have three different types in my yard, I even had a big blue tongue in the backyard this summer. I have nearly fallen for that trick though with birds, a couple of sightings of small kingfishers one blue and another that seemed a bright green had me going. I did look them up and it seems everyone planting natives and the work done along the canal and up at the old golf course has increased the bird life around here.
 
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Bloody hell gringo did you never see them running around when you were in Elwood. I have three different types in my yard, I even had a big blue tongue in the backyard this summer. I have nearly fallen for that trick though with birds, a couple of sightings of small kingfishers one blue and another that seemed a bright green had been going. I did look them up and it seems everyone planting natives and the work done along the canal and up at the old golf course has increased the bird life around here.


I never saw any anywhere but the tropics. I may have lied about being observant. As for colourful Kingfishers that sounds like something I should email the museum about also. Yeah, the canal was more sewer than anything back then.
 
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I never saw any anywhere but the tropics. I may have lied about being observant. As for colourful Kingfishers that sounds like something I should email the museum about also. Yeah, the canal was more sewer than anything back then.
A sewer with a few dead cats and seagulls floating about in it as well....ah the good old days when you could burn off autumn leaves in the gutter
and blow up a parked car......
 
Being both extra smart and observant I thought that I might have known more than science. I don't get what the big deal is, I think you are being harsh.
Ok lizard-watching enthusiast
 

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A sewer with a few dead cats and seagulls floating about in it as well....ah the good old days when you could burn off autumn leaves in the gutter
and blow up a parked car......
The canal itself is tidal, it’s the Elster creek and more to the point what drains into it that’s the problem. Over 50sq kilometres drains into that system from up at the Caulfield race course all the way to Southland. I might add that so much of that was open space back in the day, now it’s all housing and the amount of run off going into that system is crazy. With no ownership like we had under the mmbw everyone just shrugs and passes the buck. Some serious money is going to have to be spent sooner or later, it’s not a difficult fix just an expensive one and even that could be done in stages. The area up around the race course runs straight into the main drain that runs down glen eira road and into the canal at Byron street. There’s space to run a drain parallel with the canal and have a second outfall about 100 metres north, that would be a massive reduction right there. Then you remove the area around highett etc by running another line down south road then run it out at Hampton where the old sewage outfall was. Hey presto now you have just the real Elster creek and the tidal canal.
 
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Bloody hell gringo did you never see them running around when you were in Elwood. I have three different types in my yard, I even had a big blue tongue in the backyard this summer. I have nearly fallen for that trick though with birds, a couple of sightings of small kingfishers one blue and another that seemed a bright green had me going. I did look them up and it seems everyone planting natives and the work done along the canal and up at the old golf course has increased the bird life around here.

I was sitting in the Lounge one day, and my dog, a german shepherd went "rufff" and looked towards the front door.
A few minutes later does the same thing.
It has a habit of barking at nothing so i open the front door and say to it " look no-one here" . Dog picks up this blue tongue that's sitting on the porch right near my foot, shakes it a couple of times then lets go so it flies into the garden.

Took the dog back in and went looking for it, couldn't find it. ( i'm a bit lax at gardening ).

Just glad it wasn't a snake, vets bills are horrid.
 

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I was sitting in the Lounge one day, and my dog, a german shepherd went "rufff" and looked towards the front door.
A few minutes later does the same thing.
It has a habit of barking at nothing so i open the front door and say to it " look no-one here" . Dog picks up this blue tongue that's sitting on the porch right near my foot, shakes it a couple of times then lets go so it flies into the garden.

Took the dog back in and went looking for it, couldn't find it. ( i'm a bit lax at gardening ).

Just glad it wasn't a snake, vets bills are horrid.
Had a customer in Narre warren North lose her dog to a tiger snake in feb
 
I've never seen a snake where i am to be honest.
Not to say they aren't about.

Missing out, like to say I've beheaded one, but you know, when you have a land handled shovel and one stating "this is my garden now" you tend to just hack randomly at locations whilst "die die die die" ing. Just gotta make sure the first is spot on. Second one got left alone as was literally just chilling in sunlight, no harm no aggression, no foul.

With the amount of birds around, snakes are on the decline, like say I still hear random kooaburras around and they do basically snap at them and then beat them against the ground. All Like FU snake.

So if you ever want a snake free environment, get a burra, or several.
 
Missing out, like to say I've beheaded one, but you know, when you have a land handled shovel and one stating "this is my garden now" you tend to just hack randomly at locations whilst "die die die die" ing. Just gotta make sure the first is spot on. Second one got left alone as was literally just chilling in sunlight, no harm no aggression, no foul.

With the amount of birds around, snakes are on the decline, like say I still hear random kooaburras around and they do basically snap at them and then beat them against the ground. All Like FU snake.

So if you ever want a snake free environment, get a burra, or several.

Yeah my Mom has a bush property in Gippsland and we only rarely had snakes.
I heard the Kookaburra's like to eat the young snakes.

Had a couple come through there once , .....these days they say to call a snake handler for relocation, back then....the flat of the shovel works pretty good. No fancy beheading.

 
I found a gecko in my yard in Caulfield and thought I'd discovered a new species and sent a pic in an email to the museum. I got a terse reply suggesting that google would have had plenty of information on geckos in vic. If it was on a wall it was probably one of those.


This has to be one of the funniest things i have ever had the pleasure of reading

My god


Emailed the mueseum
Laughter Through Tears Reaction GIF by Studia Soyuz
 
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I found a gecko in my yard in Caulfield and thought I'd discovered a new species and sent a pic in an email to the museum. I got a terse reply suggesting that google would have had plenty of information on geckos in vic. If it was on a wall it was probably one of those.
Did you make a complaint to the museum receptionist?
 
Need to see this museum email


It was a long time ago now but I'll see if it's still there. I have a feeling I would have sounded confident that my brilliance was on the verge of being recognised finally.
 

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It was a long time ago now but I'll see if it's still there. I have a feeling I would have sounded confident that my brilliance was on the verge of being recognised finally.
day gecko lizard GIF by Head Like an Orange
 
I like that my wonder of making a new 4 legged friend has turned into gringos reflection of when geckos were first discovered. Truly, next time I see a skink I shall thank it for being a great conversation starter.

Me, after I slapped him off I laughed because hey, wasn't lost on me that my moniker is fly and well, lizards eat flies. Had to be me in my house right? I blame it being an election year for it, obviously couldn't get snakes inside so went next best.
Wink Reaction GIF by reactionseditor
 
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