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Recent content by Schofields_Lanyard

  1. Schofields_Lanyard

    List Mgmt. Contracts/Trade Thread - 2025 Edition Vol 3

    Oh please, my jokes about how Jarrod wears me like a Miss Universe sash are far more witty than anything Dark Sharks JamesTurd has and will ever come up with.
  2. Schofields_Lanyard

    News Offseason Staffing Changes - 2025 Edition

    Glad they got my good side.
  3. Schofields_Lanyard

    News Offseason Staffing Changes - 2025 Edition

    Do I have to go to Port too? I don't really want to, it's a bit of a shit hole.
  4. Schofields_Lanyard

    Game Day Round 12, 2025: West Coast vs Geelong

    Who f*cken asked you?
  5. Schofields_Lanyard

    Coach Coach for 2025

    The f*ck you just say about me?!
  6. Schofields_Lanyard

    Game Day Round 24, 2024: West Coast vs Geelong

    I'll be hanging round though, I just moved up to second favourite to be the next coach behind Montgomery.
  7. Schofields_Lanyard

    Coach Coach for 2025

    Not everyone is as ignorant as you mate, but I'll give you a pass this time. I'm tough, uncompromising and I demand a contested brand of holding identification. My preference is being worn like a sash, but at the very least I'm here to make sure Schoey gets to the restricted areas without an...
  8. Schofields_Lanyard

    Coach Coach for 2025

    Thanks for the nod mate. Looking forward to taking the reigns from Knights and that troglodyte Webster - he's been a massive dribbling sook since Schofield tried to use me to strangle him for suggesting moving Witherden to the wing and he's never let it go. There's a new sheriff in town, y'all...
  9. Schofields_Lanyard

    List Mgmt. Welcome Tyler Brockman (Traded for Picks 44 and 63 in 2023)

    Hi Simon, you coming to the family lunch on Sunday? Dad said if you're bringing your girlfriend with the dreadlocks and the bone through her nose to make sure she wears shoes and deodorant this time and to let her know there won't be any vegan dishes.
  10. Schofields_Lanyard

    List Mgmt. Contract, Trade and Draft Discussions - 2024 Edition

    Hey mate, I'm not certain what is considered a cushy job's salary at West Coast, but I can confirm that the match committee, recruitment department, marketing & promotions team and the board have spent the entire day together and we are now certain that Liam Duggan is in fact 27 years old, and...
  11. Schofields_Lanyard

    Coach Coach for 2025

    You heard it here first folks - chuck an avocado on me and drinks will be on you!
  12. Schofields_Lanyard

    Coach Adam Simpson Megathread est. 2017 - Skip to 2024: Simpson coaching tenure officially ends

    Afternoon all, guess who's got a new job for the next 7 weeks?!
  13. Schofields_Lanyard

    Coach Adam Simpson Megathread est. 2017 - Skip to 2024: Simpson coaching tenure officially ends

    I can confirm that all the 1994 premiership team and everyone else at the club thinks that Brad Hardie is a fool.
  14. Schofields_Lanyard

    List Mgmt. Welcome Clay Hall (Pick 38, 2023 National Draft)

    I'll put in a good word with the match committee if you agree to cut the crusts off my sandwich - dad said now that he's no longer CEO he's not gonna baby me anymore and that I have to fend for myself.
  15. Schofields_Lanyard

    Win Prizes The Bay needs you - a call to arms of non bay flogs (main bored posters excluded)

    Whole bunch of pathetic virgins in this thread.
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