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  1. The Royal Sampler

    Certified Legendary Thread The New Carlton Thread: 31st season without a flag for the eternal dickheads

    You wot?
  2. The Royal Sampler

    Certified Legendary Thread The New Carlton Thread: 31st season without a flag for the eternal dickheads

    Wrong part of speech. He meant to say “We need to change to a footy team”.
  3. The Royal Sampler

    Player Watch Darcy Moore

    He had a bit of a howler of a game, but as they say in the classics; one howler swallow does not a howler summer make.
  4. The Royal Sampler

    Player Watch Wil Parker

    I just re-watched the entire game and he had one errant handball and otherwise was very solid. Was unlucky his kick with 8:30 left in the first quarter didn’t create a goal for us. Absolutely nothing wrong with his game.
  5. The Royal Sampler

    2026 Trade / FA Thread

    He played a GF after having been declared dead the week before. Imagine what he could do with the resters overseeing him!
  6. The Royal Sampler

    Player Watch Wil Parker

    He is objectively not slow. Barking up the wrong tree there.
  7. The Royal Sampler

    Mid Season Draft

    Sofranidis?
  8. The Royal Sampler

    Game Day Match Discussion: Round 7 vs. Essendon Sat 25/04 at 3:15pm (MCG) ANZAC Day

    He’s become an “almost” player this year to date, barring perhaps the last quarter against the tankers.
  9. The Royal Sampler

    Game Day Match Discussion: Round 7 vs. Essendon Sat 25/04 at 3:15pm (MCG) ANZAC Day

    I was scathing of Lipinksi’s last couple of games, but he really cracked in in that quarter. Keep it up, Lippa!
  10. The Royal Sampler

    VFL VFL Round 5 v Essendon - Anzac eve - Friday April 24. 2:05pm @ KGM Centre

    Yep for mine it’s; Parker Howes Cochran Jiath Ryan Obviously you wouldn’t put Parker on a key forward, but anyone smaller than that and he ought to be well at the front of the queue. Then Howes.
  11. The Royal Sampler

    VFL VFL Round 5 v Essendon - Anzac eve - Friday April 24. 2:05pm @ KGM Centre

    He definitely moves like a backman, and fortunately is not afraid of contact.
  12. The Royal Sampler

    Player Watch Reef McInnes

    So you’re saying Reef needs a Gilmore Girls marathon?
  13. The Royal Sampler

    Mid Season Draft

    Best available.
  14. The Royal Sampler

    Player Watch Reef McInnes

    ****ing awful news for Reef. :(
  15. The Royal Sampler

    2026 Trade / FA Thread

    Good point. Maybe I conflated the timing of this new structure with O’Bree’s arrival.
  16. 1777010126383.webp

    1777010126383.webp

  17. The Royal Sampler

    2026 Trade / FA Thread

    O’Bree reportedly has a rigid pay structure he aims to stick to, which resulted in Cameron and Billy Elliott getting lowballed. It was only after the players pushed for it, that the offer to Cameron was improved. Perhaps the same couldn’t be said for Mihocek.
  18. The Royal Sampler

    2026 Trade / FA Thread

    So Mitch Lewis is out of contract and hasn’t even entered discussions with Hawthorn. How many years would he need in a FA deal? “About five”. WTAF?!
  19. The Royal Sampler

    2026 Trade / FA Thread

    We only do things for “expected points” around here.
  20. The Royal Sampler

    Training Training updates 2026.

    Yes! I love that you’re bringing science to the discussion. Much needed.
  21. The Royal Sampler

    Training Training updates 2026.

    We have to be kept in the dark to protect the vampires in the club, at least until we can destroy the head vampire. No-one is above suspicion.
  22. The Royal Sampler

    2026 Trade / FA Thread

    The point of FA from a club point of view is that you can save draft capital and spend cap space on a player you need. Blowing four firsts or whatever the **** AND nearly $2m/yr on Butters ain’t it. That’s Carltank level messiah complex BS and it’s the fast track to oblivion.
  23. The Royal Sampler

    Certified Legendary Thread The New Carlton Thread: 31st season without a flag for the eternal dickheads

    Just ask this scientician!
  24. The Royal Sampler

    Training Training updates 2026.

    Yes and he had to be invited to train indoors before he could start.
  25. The Royal Sampler

    Training Training updates 2026.

    Alternatively Wadey could chase him with a garlic bread to get him up to match fitness.
  26. The Royal Sampler

    Training Training updates 2026.

    He has contracted vampirism so was confined to training indoors.
  27. The Royal Sampler

    VFL VFL Round 4 v Carlton. Friday April 17th. 7:05pm @ Ikon Park

    And even then we swung towards endurance athletes (Ryan, Allan, Steele, etc.) rather than burst athletes (which to be fair Allan is also one).
  28. The Royal Sampler

    VFL VFL Round 4 v Carlton. Friday April 17th. 7:05pm @ Ikon Park

    Woah, slow down sonny. That’s five sentences. You must be exhausted. Have a well-earned rest.
  29. The Royal Sampler

    VFL VFL Round 4 v Carlton. Friday April 17th. 7:05pm @ Ikon Park

    #thoughtsandprayers
  30. The Royal Sampler

    VFL VFL Round 4 v Carlton. Friday April 17th. 7:05pm @ Ikon Park

    The resters strike our VFL team…

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