Universal Love #2 Nathan Jones - Retired. Thank you Chunk

[Crimson Azure]

Hey Crimson!

I’m his player sponsor this year! On the Gus and Gawn podcast it came up that he didn’t have a bronze sponsor and I decided (a bit pissed) that this was an unacceptable situation for a club champion. So I’m his sponsor.

I‘m literally meeting him tonight (Thursday night) at a sponsor event, so if you have any questions for Nathan or good wishes etc. go for it now and I’ll do my best

Also ask him which 4 posters on this board he would most like to have a meal with. Would turn into a complete crapfest no doubt.

 

[blitznu]

going to be on On The Coach Monday. hopefully to announce his retirement cause he doesn't want to be the worst 300 game player to play the game.

 

[Topkent]

Old mates entering Dr Truth and Dr Who territory these days.

 

[schmuttt]

going to be on On The Coach Monday. hopefully to announce his retirement cause he doesn't want to be the worst 300 game player to play the game.

Old mates entering Dr Truth and Dr Who territory these days.

Please stop you are legitimately my two favourite posters on here

 

[blitznu]

Please stop you are legitimately my two favourite posters on here

 

[Topkent]

If that's fishing then some campaigners are going hungry.

 

[Johnny Karate]

After some incredibly depressing research I think the highest position we have been on the ladder throughout Jonesy's career is 3rd, which was at Round 10 - 2018. And I didn't want to check to see if was playing or out injured at that time.

Although he could almost claim equal 1st (ignoring %) after Round 2 - 2017 when we were 4th, taking into account aforesaid %, although 7 other teams could also claim that. Very depressing reading.

We were 2nd after last week. Saving the best til last, hopefully.

 

[rhaz]

I‘m literally meeting him tonight (Thursday night) at a sponsor event, so if you have any questions for Nathan or good wishes etc. go for it now and I’ll do my best

Spill the goss

 

[Proper Gander]

Spill the goss

Sure. Nathan was great value. He’s really nice. Maybe he’s had long enough now to get accustomed to these things.

He talked about the team standard and mindset being much better than 2018. Said playing the two finals matches in Melbourne was an amazing experience but that they were a bit lucky to make finals since their form over the season was so erratic and they were just fortunate that they got hot and went on a roll at the end of the season which eventually they couldn’t sustain. He reckons for the past year the team has been much better overall in spite of the Cairns losses during 2020.

On post football plans I couldn’t really draw him much (without sounding like I’m telling him to retire immediately) but he said he’s got some options in business interests etc that he will consider whether to up his involvement. He doesn’t see himself as a coach but would like to maintain some level of involvement if something is available. He’s also expecting twins and all so anticipates being pretty busy. Showed us lots of photos of the kids (I find children alarming and untrustworthy but tried to keep it to myself).

He has never read Bigfooty, so can’t specify his favourite poster. I got the impression he had heard of it though. Reckons he only uses social media for sharing family pictures. Mind you he was reading his phone the whole way through Robbo’s speech so I’m not sure how true that is. He has never listened to Gus and Gawn’s podcast, even the one he was guest on. Says he has to listen to them every day practically and they never shut up. He is the guest on their podcast again next week though - and he’s not planning to listen to that either.

He was talking to Ancient for a bit about the team back when he debuted which had some very good players. Adam Tomlinson was also at our table (it was a quasi sit down event because COVID but everyone kind of ignored it after the first 30 minutes and mingled as usual). Tomlinson said he was in Year 7 when Jones debuted - and he’s been an AFL player for 10 years.

I’m not certain how it got there, but Ancient was drivelling on about how he still calls Jones “Skip” or something - Nathan said everyone pretty much does and 2021 is the first season where the name has transitioned to Max on even a semi regular basis.

Jones’ favourite player around the club currently is Kozzy - says the stuff he manages to do on a regular basis just in training is unreal.

The formal speeches and stuff (Robbo, Leaver, Ben Brown, Trac and Gawn) referred to the upcoming 300th a fair bit. I asked Nathan how he was feeling about the milestone - he reckons he doesn’t really reflect on personal milestones or games played but that once the day approaches he’ll feel differently because there is so much lead up media to do, and family and friends coming on the day to mark the occasion.

He likes the sub being introduced to take some pressure off the team when there is an injury but reckons it’s a really hard role to perform to stay mentally and physically ready to go on at a moments notice.

I gave him Headless’ cryptic message and he said thank you. He also liked my new coat. So did Max Gawn. So that was exciting.

It was actually a fun evening. I went to a 2018 B&F and enjoyed this more. I also chatted to Tomlinson a fair bit. He was seated next to me. Actually he talked to me rather - his sponsors were some of the weirdest people you will find (the whole crowd was high level weirdo TBH) so he was probably taking a break. He’s lovely and a total golf nut. That got complicated quickly because he asked me if I play and I said “yes”. No idea why I said that because I have absolutely never played golf ever. Not even once. The next 5 minutes of conversation was tricky around my favourite courses etc and I was trying to redirect the conversation before Ancient reappeared and exposed me. His favourite footballer he has played with is Toby Greene. His best mate (probably another golf freak) is Phil Davis. He reckons he has the best football brain for a guy that doesn’t (apparently) have any standout elite traits - his awareness and positioning are his forte. Tomlinson reckons he was tried as a wing because he has great endurance but likes playing down back because he is naturally very strong. He also wanted to know whether I thought the pistachio sauce served with the canapé pies was weird. It was super weird. Tasted of aniseed and nothing much else.

Adam Tomlinson didn’t mind the hubs. Said it was good for him as a new MFC player because it forced everyone to bond quickly. He said that in Melbourne the players all have their own lives so disappear after training, whereas GWS everyone does everything together even outside the club.

The rest of the time I ran messages for Gus Brayshaw to Ed Langdon to build support for Langdon to come on the podcast. Langdon said “Absolutely not. Under no circumstances. Ever.” Langdon has very nice skin close up. I kind of wanted to pat his face but didn’t. So I recruited Ancient to do some more positive lingers messaging in case weight of numbers helps the podcast cause.

Other than that, I ran messages from Harmes back to Gawn and Gus - he wanted some noise petitioning to be a permanent member of the podcast. Max said he has to buy his own microphone.

No offence to our posters who are MCC members - I’m sure they’re all great - but my god there are some fruitcakes among that set. Half of them all know each other and congregate in big packs catching up on their orthopaedic surgeries and arthritis medications. Truly bizarre. I lost count of how many people asked me where my seats are - then look shocked when I said General Admission. And they are all called “Lloyd and Barbara” as far as I can make out.

 

[Crimson Azure]

I gave him Headless’ cryptic message and he said thank you. He also liked my new coat. So did Max Gawn. So that was exciting.

This is a quintessential PG post, the whole lot. Strange, funny, awkward. Well done.

What was the cryptic message?

 

[Proper Gander]

This is a quintessential PG post, the whole lot. Strange, funny, awkward. Well done.

What was the cryptic message?

He wanted to say "you have been a great player for the Melbourne Football Club - thank you"

Headless reckoned that was a bit cryptic, but that Nathan would understand what he meant ...

 

[Headless]

Some strong highlights in that post. Personal favourites include:

(I find children alarming and untrustworthy but tried to keep it to myself)

He has never read Bigfooty, so can’t specify his favourite poster

He also liked my new coat. So did Max Gawn

11

Max Gawn

Age

32

Ht

209cm

Wt

110kg

Pos.

Ruck

Career

Season

Last 5

D

14.1

4star

K

7.4

3star

HB

6.7

4star

CL

2.8

4star

HO

35.3

5star

D

18.5

4star

K

11.5

4star

HB

7.0

4star

CL

3.5

4star

HO

29.2

5star

D

8.4

3star

K

3.6

2star

HB

4.8

4star

CL

1.0

3star

HO

15.6

5star

.

He’s lovely and a total golf nut. That got complicated quickly because he asked me if I play and I said “yes”. No idea why I said that because I have absolutely never played golf ever. Not even once.

He also wanted to know whether I thought the pistachio sauce served with the canapé pies was weird. It was super weird.

Really good. Thanks PG.

 

[rhaz]

Early POTY candidate.

 

[Dory_77]

Love it. Langdon does look to have great skin

 

[Gysberts2Bate]

Why did you selfishly try and get to 300 games robbing a youngster of a spot on our list? please Proper Gander

Absolutely dying to know....

I don’t know how he can look Kyle Dunkley in the eye knowing that he ended his AFL career

 

[A11dAtP0w3R]

I don’t know how he can look Kyle Dunkley in the eye knowing that he ended his AFL career

I prefer to believe that we would have selected Jack Carroll in the 40s in this years draft if Jones wasn't here

 

[Gysberts2Bate]

I prefer to believe that we would have selected Jack Carroll in the 40s in this years draft if Jones wasn't hear.

Jack Carroll, remember thy name

 

[A11dAtP0w3R]

Jack Carroll, remember thy name

Absolutely, he was the other player we were tossing up on at the pick we selected Rosman with.

 

[Gysberts2Bate]

Absolutely, he was the other player we were tossing up on with at the pick we selected Rosman with.

JT always gets his man eventually. Brought Lever, Langdon, McKenna and Balic home. Will get Butters, Georgiades, Holmes and Carroll back where they belong some day

 

[LeverPuller]

Who was doing the win/loss tracker? Has he hit 100 wins yet?

 

[Proper Gander]

Who was doing the win/loss tracker? Has he hit 100 wins yet?

I’m not absolutely sure, but I reckon it was Blackas87

 

[Blackas87]

Who was doing the win/loss tracker? Has he hit 100 wins yet?

98 wins, 198 losses, 3 draws

Big game for him against Richmond, will either get him 1 win from 100 or 1 loss from 200

 

[PerfectFooty]

Which game do people think he played his best game? Ignoring the statistics

 

[Proper Gander]

Which game do people think he played his best game? Ignoring the statistics

This is actually really hard with a player of 14 years, Perfect!

 

[Russian Demon]

Can we collect his essence, manufacture it and inject it into players for the rest of time?

Need to dilute it, want the essence of grunt and effort without the kicking.