Let me tell you a story. On a business trip to Japan in 2010, our group stayed in a hotel in Wakayama that catered for Japanese guests almost exclusively up until that point. This place was so traditional that they had Japanese baths that were unisex - they had to erect a bamboo fence down the middle of the bath so there was privacy between men and women to make us feel more comfortable (since you bathe naked in those places).
Anyway, one evening there was a karaoke night, and one of the guys on the trip got really drunk and accidentally fell into a poor girl serving drinks. The broken glass cut her head open and she was bleeding everywhere. Do you know what the management did first? Not rush her to the hospital, or castigate the drunken fool - nope, they made HER apologise to him while at the same time apologising themselves.
The fact that he didn't feel enough shame to do the same is exactly the reason why Australians generally don't understand the concept of face. It's about presenting yourself with integrity and honour above all things. And one of the main ways you gain face is by respecting those that are older or more advanced than you.
Gold Coast would gain a lot of face in China by being gracious enough to forego their home jumper and wearing their clash to honour Port (who would also gain massive face), because in Chinese eyes, we are both older historically and of higher value in their relationships. The AFL would also gain face by making a decision that showed their support for the senior of two "subordinate" clubs.
All parties know this. It's not about the colours, but about an opportunity to really cement Port Adelaide into China as a club with status. Gold Coast can wear red and it really won't be a big deal - it will just cost us a massive commercial advantage while giving them limited return in comparison.