WaynesWorld19
Post-Human
Welcome campaigners to another round of Fantasy ....League Finals approach, teams almost complete (in my case) .....time to get serious.
But, Fantasy Life is never a smooth path ....we're tested constantly ...our resolve is tested ....our resilience tested
Players we have been so desperate to get out of our teams, remain .....injuries, suspensions, concussion protocols, continue to delay our unalienable rights to Fantasy greatness
English, Parish, and now Stewart, frustrate coach's .....yes, I'll admit a certain frustration ....do I hold, do I trade these players
But my frustration pales into insignificance to owners, and surely you still don't have ....Mr B.Preuss (the burnman)
How many teams has Preuss hurt ......if he's named tonight, do you once will, you again be seduced ....why do you do this to yourself, and importantly your team ??
Who are the burnmen of Fantasy ? ......De Goey, Aaron Hall & his famous hammies, Whitfield's positional switch's, or the glories of days past Tom Mitchell ?
Will Cripps do a disappearing act in the backend of the season ....again ?
When one suffers the wrath of a burnman, the response can be visceral ....emotional. Occasionally without reason. Almost like the end of a relationship
So, what better way to differentiate the types of burnmen in a way only the scorned lovers of the BF Fantasy board would understand.
THE FIRST LOVE
How many times have you heard the phrase “this time will be different?”.....You’ve broken up with this burnman 5 times already, but the points and the way they make you feel are just too much to resist.
Even when they get injured or suspended again, you just can’t help yourself. You keep going back. Who could resist Toby Greene when he bottoms out for the 5th year in a row??? Lachie Whitfield has DPP again this year, he'll go 100+ if he stays fit… right? Guys?
THE TEASE
You all know this one. You look on longingly while this player gets ferocious amounts of lipstick service from the CD nerds and flies up in price.
You know the hot streak is only going to last 6 weeks before something goes wrong......but all of the thrill is in the chase and the trade.
You bring them in, and all of a sudden those traits that were so attractive in the first place immediately disappear.....you wish you could trade them out again ....you already know the moment you do, the lipstick’s coming back and you’ll be sucked in again.
THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY
Probably the most uncommon variety of burnman, this player is one who finds a home in your team from the start of the year.....who knows what you see in them ! ....we all know your judgement isn’t great.
You hold them for the first 10 rounds of the year while they average 75 .....you sit around wondering why the **** you bother.
You decide to let them down gently .... it’s not you, it’s a me kind of thing.
You act upset but in reality you’re relieved to be finally f***ing rid of them ......unless you have a look on Fantasygram in a couple of weeks and they’ve glowed up proper and started averaging 100...... good things come to those who wait, they say .....what BS, I still hate you Matt Crouch & Dangerfield !!!
THE COMMITMENTOPHOBE
One that I feel like a good chunk of the Fantasy board will relate to this year..... you’ve just met this premo .....they haven’t really been at the forefront of your mind in recent years but after a strong pre-season it was love at first KOTD ton.
The honeymoon period goes well, they average 100 for the first 6 weeks or so before something happens and they go cold..... you can’t let go..... you’re only just learning where this could head! .....you hold on and things get better, but your trust is gone & predictably you get hurt again a few weeks later.
Should have cut your losses at the first time of asking ........Brodie / Whitfield, I'm looking at you
THE OPTIMIST
Yes, burned again by my players ....in utter despair come Monday .....but by Wednesday, trading, magnificent trades in my mind have been completed ....have I pulled a heimlich maneuver on my team ??
I study my team intently .....it certainly feels rejuvenated, engorged ....am I mistaken ? .....will Monday bring yet again, a feeling of despair ..... like every other Monday ?
Will new Burnmen appear to haunt me ...... Such is Fantasy Sports
Have a great round everyone
But, Fantasy Life is never a smooth path ....we're tested constantly ...our resolve is tested ....our resilience tested
Players we have been so desperate to get out of our teams, remain .....injuries, suspensions, concussion protocols, continue to delay our unalienable rights to Fantasy greatness
English, Parish, and now Stewart, frustrate coach's .....yes, I'll admit a certain frustration ....do I hold, do I trade these players
But my frustration pales into insignificance to owners, and surely you still don't have ....Mr B.Preuss (the burnman)
How many teams has Preuss hurt ......if he's named tonight, do you once will, you again be seduced ....why do you do this to yourself, and importantly your team ??
Who are the burnmen of Fantasy ? ......De Goey, Aaron Hall & his famous hammies, Whitfield's positional switch's, or the glories of days past Tom Mitchell ?
Will Cripps do a disappearing act in the backend of the season ....again ?
When one suffers the wrath of a burnman, the response can be visceral ....emotional. Occasionally without reason. Almost like the end of a relationship
So, what better way to differentiate the types of burnmen in a way only the scorned lovers of the BF Fantasy board would understand.
THE FIRST LOVE
How many times have you heard the phrase “this time will be different?”.....You’ve broken up with this burnman 5 times already, but the points and the way they make you feel are just too much to resist.
Even when they get injured or suspended again, you just can’t help yourself. You keep going back. Who could resist Toby Greene when he bottoms out for the 5th year in a row??? Lachie Whitfield has DPP again this year, he'll go 100+ if he stays fit… right? Guys?
THE TEASE
You all know this one. You look on longingly while this player gets ferocious amounts of lipstick service from the CD nerds and flies up in price.
You know the hot streak is only going to last 6 weeks before something goes wrong......but all of the thrill is in the chase and the trade.
You bring them in, and all of a sudden those traits that were so attractive in the first place immediately disappear.....you wish you could trade them out again ....you already know the moment you do, the lipstick’s coming back and you’ll be sucked in again.
THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY
Probably the most uncommon variety of burnman, this player is one who finds a home in your team from the start of the year.....who knows what you see in them ! ....we all know your judgement isn’t great.
You hold them for the first 10 rounds of the year while they average 75 .....you sit around wondering why the **** you bother.
You decide to let them down gently .... it’s not you, it’s a me kind of thing.
You act upset but in reality you’re relieved to be finally f***ing rid of them ......unless you have a look on Fantasygram in a couple of weeks and they’ve glowed up proper and started averaging 100...... good things come to those who wait, they say .....what BS, I still hate you Matt Crouch & Dangerfield !!!
THE COMMITMENTOPHOBE
One that I feel like a good chunk of the Fantasy board will relate to this year..... you’ve just met this premo .....they haven’t really been at the forefront of your mind in recent years but after a strong pre-season it was love at first KOTD ton.
The honeymoon period goes well, they average 100 for the first 6 weeks or so before something happens and they go cold..... you can’t let go..... you’re only just learning where this could head! .....you hold on and things get better, but your trust is gone & predictably you get hurt again a few weeks later.
Should have cut your losses at the first time of asking
........Brodie / Whitfield, I'm looking at youTHE OPTIMIST
Yes, burned again by my players ....in utter despair come Monday .....but by Wednesday, trading, magnificent trades in my mind have been completed ....have I pulled a heimlich maneuver on my team ??
I study my team intently .....it certainly feels rejuvenated, engorged ....am I mistaken ? .....will Monday bring yet again, a feeling of despair ..... like every other Monday ?
Will new Burnmen appear to haunt me ...... Such is Fantasy Sports
Have a great round everyone
