Retired #420: Dyle Longfark - Legalise it!

[Howard Moon]

stop the presses : howard moon rouge faced at spelling error

 

[Doss]

Methinks he needs to harden the longfark up.

 

[Kakkle]

New hair is style!

 

[Mr_McBoogerBalls]

New hair is style!

Lavfarkde?

 

[Kakkle]

Lavfarkde?

Jyle Lavfarkde

 

[Howard Moon]

Jyle Lavfarkde

poor bloke is destined to fail

 

[Pweter]

I can't help but feel we'll never so Longfark, even that Langford bloke got a gig ahead of him.

 

[Mr Mojo Risin]

I can't help but feel we'll never so Longfark, even that Langford bloke got a gig ahead of him.

Nah Longfark is in, you know what the club is like with team sheets and forms. Couldn’t organise a * in a brothel.

 

[Rack Watts]

I'll be muting the game and playing Cypress Hill while I watch Dyle Longfark on the weekend.

 

[jmoo wan]

Langford’s in. we could probably close this down now as a mark of respect.

#missionaccomplished

 

[TheGrizz]

Jyle Lavfarkde

Deserves his own thread.

 

[threeleggedgoat]

Jyle Lavfarkde

Word is we're keen on him as a potential cat b international rookie from Finland

 

[eth-dog]

Langford’s in. we could probably close this down now as a mark of respect.

#missionaccomplished

You've jinxed us now

 

[Mr Mojo Risin]

You've jinxed us now

Yep, thread must remain until Longfark wins a Charlie.

 

[Old Stuckup]

Inb4 Langford is a late out.

 

[Maddogm]

Inb4 Langford is a late out.

For Longfark?

 

[Mr Mojo Risin]

No Longfark, no Essendon. Need a win? Dyle 56643175.

 

[Maddogm]

No Longfark, no Essendon. Need a win? Dyle 56643175.

not 634-5789?

 

[Mr Mojo Risin]

Hird started mentoring Langers somewhere about round 4-5...

https://www.theage.com.au/sport/afl...ecome-the-next-big-thing-20180815-p4zxpx.htmlhttps://www.theage.com.au/sport/afl...ecome-the-next-big-thing-20180815-p4zxpx.html

I want to be a Kyle kind of thing.

The jig is up Dyle, you've given yourself away. Where is Kyle? In your basement?

 

[Blind Turn]

I really hope the real Kyle has read this thread and got a good laugh out of it. Onfield he’s the polar opposite of Joe in his demeanour.

 

[daffo]

That's because Dyle has taken over his life.

 

[VelvetSledge]

Bombers turn to estranged forward/mid/back/utility/interchange specialist for Country Game with Cats
Bamien Darrett, 30th April, 5.00pm

Essendon's injury woes to its forward stocks were dealt another significant blow with the news that former Cat Mitch Brown would be unavailable for the next month due to a fractured wrist. His most likely replacement, Jayden Laverde, suffered a minor hamstring strain in the VFL equivalent of ANZAC Day against Collingwood, and is said to be "extremely frustrated" that his legs are made out of of swiss cheese.

As such, coach John Worsfold has turned to a true revelation from 2018 in cult hero, Dyle Longfark. The impressive forward/mid/back/utility/interchange specialist has been in the football wilderness since August last year, but according to Worsfold, "desperate times call for Longfark measures".

The notoriously private Longfark was not keen to speak to reporters outside Essendon's Tullamarine training base this morning, but offered a small statement in reference to his sudden re-appearance in the red and black.

"Shaun Ryan is a hack and Stephenson dropped it. De Goey is a knobjockey. Pennis and also dicke and balls", exclaimed Longfark as he somehow moonwalked up the stairs at The Hangar.

While it is unknown where Longfark will line up this weekend, it's sure to be a welcome return to the side, who's horrible fans deserve to all burn in hell for booing a champ.

He's back!

 

[TheGrizz]

He's back!

Did chortle.

 

[Blind Turn]

I found the accompanying photo from that article...

 

[MAAAATTDAAAAMON]

Can we assume Langford no longer has Hird as a mentor?