Rodney Dangerfield
Doesn’t matter
The Bushwood Country Club has been closed for renovations, and after some delays due to Elton Johns Wig demanding a last minute reconfiguration of the wine cellar, it pleases me greatly that the reopening is in time just before the season 24 Finals.
I’ve missed catching up with the weekly player of the round and therefore planting my infamous kiss of death on some poor soul. So what better way to compensate than to open the doors for an all welcome shindig at the upgraded headquarters.
As the punters imbibe on me I was able to get around and chat to some of the leagues characters in what has been a tumultuous season.
I was planning on asking Elton what he made of the new cellar but he’s off his face.
I’m heading over to the par and grill where a man has the floor with many SFA punters hanging off his every word.
“Pantskyle! How are you my man?”
“I’m terrific Rodney take a seat, you’re just in time for my speech”.
RD- “speech?”
“Yes Rodders I’ve taken it upon myself
“Gday boys what’s happening?”
“Ask those campaigners Rodders! Somethings up!”
RD- “which campaigners?”
Those campaigners Haro says and points to a disgusting looking Wizard, with him is a man who is seriously melting before my eyes, a Looney, and a man playing bass guitar who I recognize as brahj.
“Sup brahj?” “No comment Rodney”.
s**t feels weird.
Then my attention is grabbed by a newcomer who is going off his ******* head just yelling at everyone.
“Gday pal”
“* off Rodders. I’m here all day from dawn to dark and I’m ******* pissed off.”
RD-“ what’s the matter mate?”
“What isn’t the ******* matter you mean?”
I’m confused now. As I walk past a Dapper looking Korean man bashing on the counter yelling at the barista for better coffee I see a gentleman with a nailbag on and tools all over the place.
RD- “hey mate wtf!! It’s all finished here!”
“Oh don’t mind me mate, I’m Zackah and I’m making a stand. It’s for the TV to sit on.”.
RD- “ohhh... carry on mate”
“I am Rodders, I am”.
Back to the group converging at the stage and they are giggling away poking at something, a funny looking little thing.
RD- what’s that?
“It’s an Ant Bear, we are antagonizing it.”
RD- “don’t hurt it!”
“We don’t want to hurt it Rodders, we are just having a bit of fun”.
At the main bar a brutal looking thing is seemingly thrusting his pelvis towards the antagonists. It’s Nakia!
RD- “what goes nakkers?”
“Ahh I’m just ******* with their heads mate”.
In a dark hidden corner The Coach is offering some counseling for anyone who needs it. The young bloke shaking appears to need it but he doesn’t want a bar of it.
Then I hear “wooooo let’s do it!” It’s Cooney.
RD- “having fun mate?”
“Wooooo yeah”
RD- “that’s the main thing mate”
There are little groups all over the place, one fellow Clarke is setting up some sort of a media centre, a big campaigner Joe is interviewing people in an investigation type manner but they all seem to be having fun.
There’s a guy just walking around who just dont care but he’s got a big smile on his face.
Uncle Tony who’s house is just up from here is listening to anyone who’ll talk to him.
Harolad seems to be moving from group to group and just taking the piss, but he’s having a ball.
In fact everyone here seems to be having fun, probably except me because I started something that I don’t know how to finish.
But geez this Sweet F.A. place seems to be fun, so I need to find out why the Hate?
“Haro, what’s with the hate?”
Hate runs the Sweet F.A Rodders you dick!
Doesn’t seem that bad to me.
“You aren’t being followed by your own dick are you !!!”
That shaking boy sure is strange.
But what a fun place. Look forward to interviewing here again next season.
I’ve missed catching up with the weekly player of the round and therefore planting my infamous kiss of death on some poor soul. So what better way to compensate than to open the doors for an all welcome shindig at the upgraded headquarters.
As the punters imbibe on me I was able to get around and chat to some of the leagues characters in what has been a tumultuous season.
I was planning on asking Elton what he made of the new cellar but he’s off his face.
I’m heading over to the par and grill where a man has the floor with many SFA punters hanging off his every word.
“Pantskyle! How are you my man?”
“I’m terrific Rodney take a seat, you’re just in time for my speech”.
RD- “speech?”
“Yes Rodders I’ve taken it upon myself
“Gday boys what’s happening?”
“Ask those campaigners Rodders! Somethings up!”
RD- “which campaigners?”
Those campaigners Haro says and points to a disgusting looking Wizard, with him is a man who is seriously melting before my eyes, a Looney, and a man playing bass guitar who I recognize as brahj.
“Sup brahj?” “No comment Rodney”.
s**t feels weird.
Then my attention is grabbed by a newcomer who is going off his ******* head just yelling at everyone.
“Gday pal”
“* off Rodders. I’m here all day from dawn to dark and I’m ******* pissed off.”
RD-“ what’s the matter mate?”
“What isn’t the ******* matter you mean?”
I’m confused now. As I walk past a Dapper looking Korean man bashing on the counter yelling at the barista for better coffee I see a gentleman with a nailbag on and tools all over the place.
RD- “hey mate wtf!! It’s all finished here!”
“Oh don’t mind me mate, I’m Zackah and I’m making a stand. It’s for the TV to sit on.”.
RD- “ohhh... carry on mate”
“I am Rodders, I am”.
Back to the group converging at the stage and they are giggling away poking at something, a funny looking little thing.
RD- what’s that?
“It’s an Ant Bear, we are antagonizing it.”
RD- “don’t hurt it!”
“We don’t want to hurt it Rodders, we are just having a bit of fun”.
At the main bar a brutal looking thing is seemingly thrusting his pelvis towards the antagonists. It’s Nakia!
RD- “what goes nakkers?”
“Ahh I’m just ******* with their heads mate”.
In a dark hidden corner The Coach is offering some counseling for anyone who needs it. The young bloke shaking appears to need it but he doesn’t want a bar of it.
Then I hear “wooooo let’s do it!” It’s Cooney.
RD- “having fun mate?”
“Wooooo yeah”
RD- “that’s the main thing mate”
There are little groups all over the place, one fellow Clarke is setting up some sort of a media centre, a big campaigner Joe is interviewing people in an investigation type manner but they all seem to be having fun.
There’s a guy just walking around who just dont care but he’s got a big smile on his face.
Uncle Tony who’s house is just up from here is listening to anyone who’ll talk to him.
Harolad seems to be moving from group to group and just taking the piss, but he’s having a ball.
In fact everyone here seems to be having fun, probably except me because I started something that I don’t know how to finish.
But geez this Sweet F.A. place seems to be fun, so I need to find out why the Hate?
“Haro, what’s with the hate?”
Hate runs the Sweet F.A Rodders you dick!
Doesn’t seem that bad to me.
“You aren’t being followed by your own dick are you !!!”
That shaking boy sure is strange.
But what a fun place. Look forward to interviewing here again next season.
