Analysis Abby Don't Wanna Be Jessie's Girl

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Fossie 32

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Thread starter #3


Stringer cleaned up by Rance


Jake Stringer is helped from the field after a head knock. Picture: Michael Klein
JAKE STRINGER

One of the big talking points of the off-season, Stringer made headlines not just for his trade from the Western Bulldogs but also for everything from his new haircut to chest tattoos. His debut in Bombers colours proved fairly underwhelming, in a new role playing mostly in the midfield. After starting on the bench, he had his head cut open in a clash with Alex Rance’s chin which required treatment. He returned to the field but was not quite right and finished with just six disposals from limited game time.
 

Fossie 32

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Thread starter #4
ASK ABBY: Abby Gilmore is set to pen a new column for the Herald Sun.
VIC News
Abby Gilmore: ‘There is nothing I won’t share’
Alice Coster, Herald Sun
February 16, 2018 5:30pm

ABBY Gilmore doesn’t do suffering in silence.

The former partner of premiership player Jake Stringer and mother to his two children never fitted the WAG mould where you are expected to be seen but not heard.

The millennial mother doesn’t turn the other cheek. Abby doesn’t filter.

THE TRUTH BEHIND MY SPLIT FROM JAKE STRINGER

Her life imploded over the years in which Stringer cheated on her countless times and in humiliating circumstances when she was nursing a six-week-old baby.

Abby chose to stop being the silent victim.

She fought to regain control of her life and find the strength to look after her two young daughters, Milla, 3, and the now 18-month-old Arlo.

She spoke out to let other people know she was proud and independent.

“I’m no more special than the next person,” she declares. “I learnt a lot in all my suffering. It was magnified and I faced everything in the public eye.

“I wanted people to look up to me, not to laugh at me. I didn’t want to walk around with my head down. I didn’t want to feel like a victim.”

ABBY GILMORE: MY POST-NATAL DEPRESSION FIGHT
Herald Sun's new columnist Abby Gilmore at home with her kids Milla, 3, and Arlo, 20 months. Picture: Alex Coppel.
Abby copped a backlash.

Speaking out about Stringer’s infidelities came at a price.

There was the humiliation of being sent X-rated images of the “Package”, as Stringer was nicknamed, from AFL groupies he had on the side.

There was his gambling addiction and what she sees as the toxic boys’ club mentality inside the AFL.

Abby’s revelations drew the ire, no scrap that, the fury, of many.

“I knew people would judge me and lash out,” Abby says. “I had a lot of people, the clubs, family members, managers who tried to stop and intimidate me. But I knew it was the right thing to do.

“When trying to create change, it’s always going to make people uncomfortable.”


Gilmore with close friend, Bulldogs player Jason Johannisen.
Abby chose to find strength in the criticism and railed against what she saw as the AFL “machine”programmed to keep embarrassing issues in the dark.

In doing so she has amassed a following of like-minded people on social media, people exhausted at keeping their own secrets behind closed doors.

“It’s not just about coming out of a relationship like I did. It’s about anxiety, depression, post-natal trauma, miscarriages, so many different elements of life,” she says.

“So much is still such a taboo subject. I hope by speaking out about my own pain it can help others to realise they are not alone. So many of us are all dealing with this weird-arse crap.”

SUSIE O’BRIEN: DON’T BE TOO QUICK TO FORGIVE A CHEATER

Abby Gilmore has joined the Herald Sun as an outspoken columnist to do just that. Not air her dirty laundry but to try to demystify what so many others find too hard to talk about.

“There is nothing I won’t share. I just want to connect with people going through similar things.”
Gilmore’s honesty came at a price. Picture: Alex Coppel.
Abby knows she is not everyone’s cup of tea. She isn’t bothered by that, which is refreshing in a world where peoples’ seemingly glamorous and perfect lives are celebrated on Instagram and other social media.

Abby wants to cut through. Nothing is off the table as she talks about her miscarriage or taking antidepressants when her depression was so bad after breaking up with Stringer that she couldn’t get out of bed to look after her children.

Abby has opened up about getting “her boobs done” to make herself feel more body confident.

She talks about meeting a couple of days ago the new girlfriend of Stringer, now with the Essendon Football Club.


With former partner Stringer at the 2015 Brownlow Medal. Picture: Michael Klein.

Gilmore doesn’t hold back, wanting to help others heal by sharing her experiences. Picture: Alex Coppel.
She tells of finding trust again in a new relationship and the toll of a messy breakup on her children.

“I’m not trying to be some rebel or some badarse WAG,” she says. “But when you are a part of that WAG lifestyle or whatever you want to call it, you represent the football club too. So you have to respect your partner and your football club. Now I have broken out on my own. You have to respect yourself,” she says.

Writing a blog (accordingtoabby.com.au) and running self-help workshops across Australia called Love Yo Self, Abby has discovered great strength in sharing her story.

“I feel so much stronger in who I am now. If I can help women who have lost their path and find confidence and self-worth from talking then it is all worth it.

“Sharing is my healing. I talk through everything and try and nut out the tough questions and really get through things. A lot of people suppress things through life and have to deal with it later.

“I am an open book.”

READ ABBY GILMORE’S FIRST COLUMN IN NEXT WEEK’S SATURDAY HERALD SUN

*Join Abby at her next Love Yo Self workshop on Friday at One Roof Australia, Southbank, from 6pm. Tickets trybooking.com
 

Fossie 32

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Thread starter #5
Abby Gilmore: How the dark times can lead you to find the best in yourself
Abby Gilmore, Herald Sun
February 23, 2018 5:30pm
Subscriber only
REVISITING that dark time in my life last year when Jake and I split up has been hard.

I had to look at it all over again last week as I was introduced to Herald Sun readers.

But since that time, we have all come so far.

I’m so grateful to see smiles on my kids’ faces again, and I think this is because we’ve been doing so well with “co-parenting”.

It requires sucking up your pride and putting your **** aside no matter how dim and dark it is.

So Jake if you are reading this, high fives all round because I really do think we do a good job despite our own personal struggles behind the scenes.

We lead different lives now and are on different journeys.

THE TRUTH BEHIND MY SPLIT WITH JAKE

I’ve met my match in Leighroy, which I never believed would happen for a long time if at all, and I feel incredibly lucky and blessed that he and his beautiful family are in the girls’ and my life.

It’s been a whirlwind but I’d do it all over again to get the outcome I have now as these people bring out the best in me.

It was quite hard at the beginning but now I understand why it needed to happen.

It shaped the trajectory of my life because the way I processed it was that as long as what you do and what you’re connected to serves a greater purpose than just yourself, you will always trample the challenges of life.

DON’T MISS NEW PODCAST ‘DEAR ABBY’ STARTS MONDAY


And that’s how I came to start these workshops teaching self-love with my incredible life coach, Clair Hill.

I’m a firm believer in the universe having your back, and why wouldn’t I be after being presented with this incredible opportunity.

When offered this role I had major doubt. Never in a million years did I think my writing would take me here where I’d be speaking to an even wider audience to those on my socials.

I believe that when you are in service to someone else you are the happiest.

When I was sharing my experience I was helping people immensely and that’s why I’m just so happy and grateful to have been able to take this path less travelled so I can help and inspire you too.

‘I WAS LITERALLY BOOB-OBSESSED’: WHY I’M GETTING MINE DONE


The split with former partner Jake Stringer was tough, but both have come out better for it. Picture Norm Oorloff

Abby has found new love and a new direction. Picture: Jason Edwards
Some people thought speaking up was silly and for me that was another tough lesson. Not to back down or succumb, but to stand in my truth and keep going.

Change makes people feel uncomfortable, that’s why we don’t like it and it’s hard to master. But here I am, a few people less in my life but all the more richer and full of the right ones who are meeting me with the same energy and love.

Direction is much more important than speed, I’m really taking my time from now on and learning a lot as I go.

I know I’m headed in the right direction so make sure you are too.

It was daunting because it meant speaking to people who don’t really know what I’m about (apart from what you may have read) but it was also exciting because it meant I got an opportunity to show you my most authentic self.

GOT A QUESTION FOR ABBY? EMAIL dearabby@news.com.au OR POST A COMMENT BELOW

What made me so doubtful was the fact that I understand the more you put yourself out there, the more open to criticism you are and, although that is enough to turn some people off, it wasn’t for me. After I spoke up last year, I was put out there for people to discuss whether I liked it or not so I’m grateful that now I get to control what’s written and people can see what I’m about.

I’m not here to talk trash, to bag, or drag people through the mud. I don’t believe you get anywhere in life by making others feel inferior. I am here, however, to speak the truth when I feel it needs to be spoken.

Bring awareness to people who don’t particularly have a voice and shed light on things that I feel need it.

The last 18 months have been very interesting. I’ve done things I never thought I would, I’ve made friends with people I never thought I’d accept into my life, and I’ve forgiven people I never thought I could - landing my kids and I in a much better space.

It’s amazing what gratitude and compassion can teach you in a testing time. Everything that’s been presented to me in life hasn’t come easy - despite what some might think.

So here it is, my first column. I can’t wait to talk more on some of these points - and more - with you over the coming months.

Want more? Follow Abby on Instagram and check out her blog, According to Abby.
 

Fossie 32

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Thread starter #7
"Dear Abby" 24/2/2018

After a breakup, how do you go from not wanting to get out of bed and in the foetal position to wanting to live your life again?
HEARTBROKEN

A: Part of you needs to be in that foetal position for a time. You need to figure out what is upsetting you and work through all those things.
For me, it was surrounding myself with the right people and having them build me back up until I was strong enough to move on with life. I relied heavily on friends and family, so it's important to make sure you have a good network around you.
Some of us enjoy playing the victim. It's really about snapping out of that. You are the director of your life. You can stay in that sadness - you might even push your friends and your family away for a time. Or you can take a different path and inspire your friends and family.
 

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Anja_Nees

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#12
‘Abby Gilmore is set to pen a new column for the Herald-Sun’.....Newscorp at its finest. WTF.

That rag should be shut down. Don’t buy that sh*t people. Brisdog implores you!!

There are alternatives out there, online, free and you are not supporting Rupert Murdoch - the evil campaigner.
Fanning her delusion is helping no one. It’s always people with the most chaotic personal lives that become life coaches.
 

Allan Shorty

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#14
"Dear Abby" 24/2/2018

After a breakup, how do you go from not wanting to get out of bed and in the foetal position to wanting to live your life again?
HEARTBROKEN

A: Part of you needs to be in that foetal position for a time. You need to figure out what is upsetting you and work through all those things.
For me, it was surrounding myself with the right people and having them build me back up until I was strong enough to move on with life. I relied heavily on friends and family, so it's important to make sure you have a good network around you.
Some of us enjoy playing the victim. It's really about snapping out of that. You are the director of your life. You can stay in that sadness - you might even push your friends and your family away for a time. Or you can take a different path and inspire your friends and family.
You go girl.
 

Cadillac

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#16
Jesus. They're paying this Country Bogan to voice her opinion? And here I was thinking the Herald sun couldn't get any worse. . . They are making her out to be some sort of hero. The real heroes are the single Mums who are forced to work two jobs just to get by in life. Not the ones who have the benefit of living off child support of an AFL footballer who still lives in his house. Couldn't give a **** about what she has to say.

It's esendons problem now anyway. Not ours.
 
Last edited:

Braybrook Son

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#21
‘Abby Gilmore is set to pen a new column for the Herald-Sun’.....Newscorp at its finest. WTF.

That rag should be shut down. Don’t buy that sh*t people. Brisdog implores you!!

There are alternatives out there, online, free and you are not supporting Rupert Murdoch - the evil campaigner.
I remember a time when you didn’t get a job at the Herald unless you followed Collingwood!
 
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#24
She must be really switched on to be suffering through all this trauma, raising two kids by herself AND going to uni to study journalism. I mean, I’m sure she had to study it to do get this gig...

Say what you want about Jake but atleast he provided good footy for this club for a little bit. This ‘lady’ has done nothing but be a pain in the arse. And she’s getting rich off it.

Good riddance. I hope Jake can get some of his money back from her eventually.
 
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