At what age did you/friends/family seem to 'give up'?

[mouncey2franklin]

I'm in my early 30s. I look around and I see people I know who are still clinging on to hope that things will get better.

There are some who seemed to give up and accept things for what they are early, some even in their early 20s.

Others still seem to be striving for something, imagining a better existence in the future, whether or not they are truly working towards it.

I'm talking about peace, contentedness, wealth, success, any or all of these things.

Something as simple as staying in shape. Something as complex as building a business. Anything in between.

At what age do you think most people give up and simply accept that their lot in life probably isn't ever improving?

[Fwiw the people I know who gave up early, seem on average happier than those stuck in perpetual fantasy/hope]

 

[Run n Spread]

I think you have to differentiate between chucking it in all together vs been realistic and achieving what's possible given your capabilities.

I'd say for the most part peoples realism sets in around early 30s. Of course it depends on what life goals are and family situation etc.

However I disagree in that the above is a minority of people. Most people I find of all ages are completely deluded about what will happen and hold onto that hope. All good thou as they are probably happy so good for them. Only problem exists when they suck others in or others are somehow meant to complete their fantasy.

 

[t_94]

Probably another year or so for me. So 25.

 

[Exe Gesis]

I'm in my early 30s. I look around and I see people I know who are still clinging on to hope that things will get better.

There are some who seemed to give up and accept things for what they are early, some even in their early 20s.

Others still seem to be striving for something, imagining a better existence in the future, whether or not they are truly working towards it.

I'm talking about peace, contentedness, wealth, success, any or all of these things.

Something as simple as staying in shape. Something as complex as building a business. Anything in between.

At what age do you think most people give up and simply accept that their lot in life probably isn't ever improving?

[Fwiw the people I know who gave up early, seem on average happier than those stuck in perpetual fantasy/hope]

Excellent thread. Best thread since whichever last one i posted here.

I think its very sad people NEVER give up, the majority, always still clinging to hope, dreams, even long after things have passed them by, or specific things they hope for have evaporated.

 

[edgie]

19

 

[Scotland]

I'm a 34 year old average height white male in Australia.

I've recently given up on my dreams of being drafted to the NBA. It's been touch, but you can cope with the right people around you.

 

[Gough]

If I can't get a game for the Test team now it's never going to happen.

 

[raskolnikov]

I don't think I ever had much hope to begin with. Not that I have a terrible life but I've always been content with being average.

Reminds me of this American Beauty scene.

 

[Run n Spread]

I don't think I ever had much hope to begin with. Not that I have a terrible life but I've always been content with being average.

Reminds me of this American Beauty scene.

Which one are you?

The drug dealer, the one who would end up on the street if they tried to be different or the ordinary one?

 

[utility]

I like the GROW model as a simple way to think about goal setting:

G - State your Goal
R - Is it Realistic?
O - What Options do you have?
W - When are you going to start?

It means giving up entirely is purely a choice. Depending on some people they give up before they get through their teens, others never give up. I just about gave up when I was 20, was going to quit uni to flip burgers. Fortunately I didn't!

 

[Smoooothy]

If I can't get a game for the Test team now it's never going to happen.

i'm clinging onto my dream too

if mitch marsh can score test match centuries, surely it can't be that hard can it?

 

[Scotland]

GROW, that's a new one.

I've heard SMART plenty of times. Specific Measurable Achievable Relevant Timely.

I think what people forget about goal setting is that it's OK to fail and it's OK to change tack as long as you recognise you're doing it.

 

[Scotland]

i'm clinging onto my dream too

if mitch marsh can score test match centuries, surely it can't be that hard can it?

Yes but is your dad Geoff Marsh?

 

[revo333]

Its ok to give up...

But don't spread your negativity on others and become that person who complains about their job,wife and kids all the time.

 

[perthblue]

I think it is human nature to always want more.

Like you see elderly ceo's worth billions still trying to make as much money as possible its like dude, you can't take it with you to hades.

 

[Smoooothy]

Yes but is your dad Geoff Marsh?

I wish my daddy could get me a cushy job

 

[Richard Pryor]

I'm 22 and content to be a peon. At pretty much any other point in human history that would probably mean working from dawn til dusk in a field and having to run around a maypole or something for fun so I'm fine with it.

 

[raskolnikov]

Which one are you?

The drug dealer, the one who would end up on the street if they tried to be different or the ordinary one?

I'm completely ordinary.

 

[Silent Alarm]

Depends.

I'm a cynical *er and always have been but it gets worse, but in a way the resignation makes me at times happier. But I care about what I eat, stress about my outfits, shave, take a *in' shower, and try to keep a skinny enough shape on me. I dream every single day about s**t that'll never come true and honestly it keeps me going. I still harbour ambition of a job I don't completely despise and I'm not going to let reality completely set in it. The eternal springtime of university is over but I'm not ready to lay down. Yet.

Other people I know never left home and you'd ask them about uni, and it was 'ah, nah, took a year off' and now spend their days smoking weed and working 15 hours a week. They never gave themselves a chance.

Some are on 110k but they're choofing down ciggies and Chiko rolls every day and still drive home completely buck-eye pissed every night. They call people who go to England to play country cricket 'NTTAWWTs.' That's giving up.

Some people are plunking down deposits or having a kid, doing both, or have chosen one and considering doing the other. They're 21, 25, 27. To me that's a form of giving up to. Some of these have never had a serious boyfriend or girlfriend before and I get the feeling there's a huge parental pressure to settle into life and 'get serious.' To me, resigning yourself to the first person you like at that age is a form of giving up even if you have a decent job or your guts isn't fat. At the same time, life is very dull and misleading to young people so the idea of having a kid to give you a daily purpose makes sense too. But it's still 'giving up.' I think.

 

[Nothing]

If I can't get a game for the Test team now it's never going to happen.

I dropped 2 catches and missed a stumping on the weekend. I figure with an effort like that I'm next in line. Only marginally older than Paine too.

 

[Thegibbsgamble]

I'm a 34 year old average height white male in Australia.

I've recently given up on my dreams of being drafted to the NBA. It's been touch, but you can cope with the right people around you.

It's ok.

 

[Thegibbsgamble]

When your born somewhere a sacrifice was made for you to have life.

Life is about repaying that gift you received. Something died so you could live

To many die with a wretched anxiety as a result of western culture fooling us to believe life is about materialist and ego things

There is nothing to give up on if you're repaying that gift given to you. It is no competition.

 

[Kurve]

Had to give up my dream of being Australia's first female jockey to win the Melbourne Cup when told I was already too tall and would be too heavy when I filled out. I would have been prepared to dedicate my life to bulimia for the cause but I was hard up against it, the family weren't supportive at all. 17 years old, I gave up and have wandered aimlessly since.

 

[WCErevival]

If you're not striving to get better then what's the point?

 

[Jobe Watson]

If you're giving up on life before you're, like, 50 then you're doing it wrong.

No one is forcing you to live a mundane domestic life of a 9-5 job, 2 kids and house with a white picket fence.