Best Footy Sledges!! (and replies!)

[harry_harmonica]

Given all the Publicity about sledging, would love to read some good, solid sledges and stinging retorts from BigFooty fans!!

 

[trueblue_91]

In cricket Mark Waugh said to someone your not good enough to play for england. And the opponent replied at least i'm the best in my family( sorry its a cricket one but its gold)

 

[konstas_87]

another cricket one... we were playing india close to the end of s waughs career.
Patel (young indian keeper of the time) said to Tugger Waugh: show us one of those famous slog sweeps,
Waugh said: show some respect mate you were in nappies when i made my debut

 

[Father Jack]

"So, what colour was the couch?"

 

[buggermedumplings]

Yes another cricket one...

Think it was McGrath sledging DeVilliers, kept standing in front of his wicket. McGrath yells out "Why are you so fat" to which DeVilliers replies "Because everytime I sleep with your wife, she gives me a cookie"...

 

[hong_kong_bond]

Yes another cricket one...

Think it was McGrath sledging DeVilliers, kept standing in front of his wicket. McGrath yells out "Why are you so fat" to which DeVilliers replies "Because everytime I sleep with your wife, she gives me a cookie"...

old one...

except it was against Zimbabwe - Eddo Brandes

so funny, that Healy and the slips cordon were nearly rolling around on the pitch with laughter

 

[zero]

i remember an aboriginal VFL umpire years ago talking about how racial villification had changed over the years, and how it was in the old days.

apparently way back when he was umpiring a game when a young robert dipierdomenico didnt like one of his decisions and called him a ****ing b***

he reckons that he used the traditional method of conflict resolution, and said straight back to him "shut the **** up, you fat wog"

 

[chapmanmagic35]

You get some pearlers in Cricket...

Warne: "I've been waiting to bowl to you for two years".
Cullinan: "Looks like you spent it eating".

 

[Dan Moody]

i remember an aboriginal VFL umpire years ago talking about how racial villification had changed over the years, and how it was in the old days.

apparently way back when he was umpiring a game when a young robert dipierdomenico didnt like one of his decisions and called him a ****ing b***

he reckons that he used the traditional method of conflict resolution, and said straight back to him "shut the **** up, you fat wog"

glenn james, last of the decent field umpires. does a lot for aboriginal disadvantaged kids now.

 

[trueblue_91]

You get some pearlers in Cricket...

Warne: "I've been waiting to bowl to you for two years".
Cullinan: "Looks like you spent it eating".

Cant remember who but i think it involved botham

Player A- How's your wife and my kids

Player B- the wife is fine the kids are *ed

 

[Sir_Adrian84]

cricket but still funny
http://www.indiandownunder.com.au/forums/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=3237

 

[skybeau]

Jack Dyer once said to a guy called Norm McDonald "you stink, get downwind, you black bastard".

To which Norm replied "I take a very dark outlook on that statement, Jack" while running away and kicking a goal.

To borrow a Dyerism, you'd get life forever if you did that nowadays...

 

[Lonie_from_50]

Yes another cricket one...

Think it was McGrath sledging DeVilliers, kept standing in front of his wicket. McGrath yells out "Why are you so fat" to which DeVilliers replies "Because everytime I sleep with your wife, she gives me a cookie"...

That was Ian Healy to Ranatunga(downathroatofaskipper)

 

[Wing Commander]

Cheeky thread

 

[^BL|TZ^]

i remember an aboriginal VFL umpire years ago talking about how racial villification had changed over the years, and how it was in the old days.

apparently way back when he was umpiring a game when a young robert dipierdomenico didnt like one of his decisions and called him a ****ing b***

he reckons that he used the traditional method of conflict resolution, and said straight back to him "shut the **** up, you fat wog"

Absolute GOLD!!

 

[Adrian Shelton]

Good old 'Quick Draw' class act!!

 

[dylan101]

That was Ian Healy to Ranatunga(downathroatofaskipper)

naaa it was definately Eddo Brandes, Heals said in inside cricket

 

[The Coon Dog]

Ray Huppatz once picked up a small bone that he found on the ground. He approached umpire Glen James & said, 'You've been umpiring like a dog, you might aswell have a bone.'

Quick as a flash James retorted, 'Give it to me, I'll point it at you.'


A non footy one. A woman once said to Sir. Winston Churchill, 'If I were married to you, I should poison your tea.' to which he replied, 'And if I were married to you madam, I should drink it.'

 

[dylan101]

The sledge that heals supposedly said to arjuna ranatunga was the one involving putting a mars bar on a good length but that was actually said to the south african kossie ventor

 

[hkfootyfan]

Ray Huppatz once picked up a small bone that he found on the ground. He approached umpire Glen James & said, 'You've been umpiring like a dog, you might aswell have a bone.'

Quick as a flash James retorted, 'Give it to me, I'll point it at you.'


A non footy one. A woman once said to Sir. Winston Churchill, 'If I were married to you, I should poison your tea.' to which he replied, 'And if I were married to you madam, I should drink it.'

and another

Woman to Churchil "You are Drunk". Reply "yes madam, and you are ugly, however, in the morning I shall be sober".

 

[Giants FC]

Many years ago during my utterly undistinguished junior playing days, one of my team-mates was a committed Christian. The opposition player who was on him spent the whole day in his face, saying "come on Bible-basher, have a go Bible-basher" and baiting him all day.
In the last quarter, the Christian couldn't stand it any more and flattened his opponent with a high shot. The opponent got up and called out to the umpire "Oooh, did you see that ump?"
The umpire replied "Yeah. Not bad for a Bible-basher."

 

[roostersgal4eva]

The sledge that heals supposedly said to arjuna ranatunga was the one involving putting a mars bar on a good length but that was actually said to the south african kossie ventor

he told Aguna that 'You dont get a runner for being a fat ****'

When he captained Qld against the Poms in a tour match he also asked a player on the boundary to come in under Hussain's nose.....the player steped 5 steps foward and Heals goes 'That will do'

 

[Rough_Edges]

The one that happened on the w/e.

About daughters or something?

 

[Sir_Adrian84]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlFF...ctory.net/forum/showthread.php?t=31046&page=4

absolute classic

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1NF...ctory.net/forum/showthread.php?t=31046&page=4

a sledge that backfires

 

[Sir_Adrian84]

you've just dropped the world cup