Bulldog clerihews

[Fossie 32]

We had a ruckman called Willy
Who Rocket said could be silly
But he was smart it would seem
And to boot he made the AA team

 

[Fossie 32]

Danny Southern had toothless agression
Making the most of every possession
Sumich nearly met the Grim Reaper
When Danny put him in a sleeper

 

[Fossie 32]

Peter Welsh had such cool hair
He had it over Bonti there
But Marcus was a Bullgod on our biggest day
It had to be Him as Bruce would say

 

[Fossie 32]

Monty had a ton of class
Pulling speccies quite en masse
The magpies tried to knock him out
But then they copped a Bulldogs rout

 

[Northern Dogs]

A recent defender could take a good mark,
But with lots of injuries could not stay on the park,
He went to the Lions, his first name was Marcus,
It's a pity he wasn't as loyal as Zeno Tzakzaris.

 

[Northern Dogs]

To find a Richard Radziminski rhyme
You would have a very hard time
Played 14 games from 69 to 71
Number of goals kicked: None

OK Fossie, here you are:

He played a few games, did Richard Radziminsky,
But not as many as Patrick Lipinski.
I've also tried to rhyme with Giansiracusa,
But all that that's done is turn me into a Boozer!

 

[Libba39]

Good old Matty Boyd
Goal-kicking he would avoid
And it was always quite sad
When commentators called him Brad

 

[ScragCity]

Easton Wood
* he's good
Quads so thick
Hair always slick

 

[worbod]

Ellie Blackburn is in charge of our ladies.
They form a bigger bunch than The Bradys.
But in all seriousness, I can see
That Ellie has one premiership medallion more than me.

 

[Libba39]

Little Lessey Bamblett
Wrote a lengthy pamphlet
About how to grab the crumbs
When it bounced off Beasers thumbs

 

[Libba39]

Our tallest player Peter Street
Had tiny hands but giant feet
And many-a-mark would he drop
So now he walks the beat as a cop

 

[ScragCity]

Big Bad Brucey
Scoring profusely
Was under some flack
Got his mojo back

 

[Bont2Bruce]

Some very clever work in here.

When reading these, does anyone else get the feeling that a 5th line that rhymes again with the first two is missing? I can't shake the need to turn them all into limericks!

 

[dogwatch]

I love to watch our ruckman Timmy
Gather cleanly, side-step, shimmy,
Intercept across back half -
He's our galloping giraffe.

 

[Glaeken Oracle]

Bulldog players drafted or traded in
Once they're here, I'll back 'em in.
Sometimes it's hard if I used to hate 'em
Eventually though, I'll usually rate 'em
Except if it was ever Toby Green in our colours, in which case I'd spit on him, cut him up into little pieces, and mince the little pieces up and drop the minced sludge back in Blacktown where it belongs, or rub it into Leon Cameron's hair. (I had a lot of trouble with this line - it extended beyond the acceptable 4, it was hard to express in 8-10 words, and I just couldn't get it to rhyme with any of the previous 4. But I felt I had to include it to portray an accurate representation of where I draw the line for players who come to our club with an existing AFL career.)

I am a failure at clerihews - but I feel better having got that off my chest.

 

[dogwatch]

I wasn't sure about Luke Beveridge
But now I know he gives us leverage
It's not quite what you think,
But I've taken to the drink.

 

[ScragCity]

Bevo loves to surf and skate
To cut his own hair, to lift heavy weights
A polymath, it might be said
And one day he could lay an egg

 

[Fossie 32]

Today at 12:54 PM

Bulldog players drafted or traded in
Once they're here, I'll back 'em in.
Sometimes it's hard if I used to hate 'em
Eventually though, I'll usually rate 'em
Except if it was ever Toby Green in our colours, in which case I'd spit on him, cut him up into little pieces, and mince the little pieces up and drop the minced sludge back in Blacktown where it belongs, or rub it into Leon Cameron's hair. (I had a lot of trouble with this line - it extended beyond the acceptable 4, it was hard to express in 8-10 words, and I just couldn't get it to rhyme with any of the previous 4. But I felt I had to include it to portray an accurate representation of where I draw the line for players who come to our club with an existing AFL career.)

I am a failure at clerihews - but I feel better having got that off my chest.

 

[Glaeken Oracle]

Today at 12:54 PM

At least I achieved something with that post!

 

[Libba39]

A south aussie plodder Matthew Panos
Didn't quite have the power of Thanos
Tried clicking his fingers throughout the year
But could only make himself disappear

 

[bobs head soup]

Was he any good as a player? Undoubtedly so,
In the Team of the Century says all you need to know,
Was he any good as a Coach? Give me a spell,
I remember Royce Hart only far too well

 

[Libba39]

The vastly overrated Luke Penny
Was the tall defender hope of many
Some of his bad play did bewilder
Luckily he left us for St Kilda

 

[Northern Dogs]

A clever little goalsneak called Charlie Pagnoccolo,
Played quite a bit like Hawthorn's Puopolo.
I remember Lou Richards used to call him Smithy,
But the way that he played could generate a s..... (State of excitement)

 

[Southern 8]

Doug was magical on his wing
his spear passes made the opposition really sting
could also mark and turn on a dime
my favourite Bulldog of all time.

 

[Southern 8]

Johnno, known as the smiling assassin
Wore the 6 of the great Charlie Sutton,
Could play many a position
never forget his sunny disposition.