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Bullying

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I find it hard to understand bullying as an adult - surely if you are being bullied, you just speak up? But different personalities i guess

Yeah i think that's the case. Evolution i suppose. Like racism/sexism in sport was just to get under oppinents skin. today it can be seen as bullying
 

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I find it hard to understand bullying as an adult - surely if you are being bullied, you just speak up? But different personalities i guess
Speaking up can mean a target on your back.
 
Yeah bullying can vary.

We take the piss outta each other in our office all the time. Some ppl would take offence at that who cant take a joke and would hate it/complain.

Its all context and common sense tho really.

Same here


Im still careful though. The biggest dude at my workplace makes the most fat jokes, I still don’t feel comfortable making them toward him.

I remember in about year 5 my mates and I being accused of bullying for saying “you’re crazy” to each other, clearly out of fun.
Though this was the same teacher that once mocked a kids homework in front of the entire class.

I now have this theory that people who get offended on others behalves (unless they have a good reason to) are bullies themselves.
 
I find it hard to understand bullying as an adult - surely if you are being bullied, you just speak up? But different personalities i guess
Exactly. Different personalities. Also,

People twist stories too, so the bully can deny, or make up rumours, turn people against the bullied and all of those plus more. Manipulate, gas light, the list goes on and on. Simply speaking about it doesn't always solve the issue. As Ioppolo said, it can make things worse. It happens in all aspects of life to many different people, but those that work in business and office know about this behaviour for sure. Bullies will target those they they see as being better or more successful than them, as well as the vulnerable and weaker.

Psychology, learn that my friend. I'm not having a go, seriously study this and broaden your knowledge. You can help others or maybe yourself down the track. Plus it doesn't hurt to know some MMA:p
 

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I find it hard to understand bullying as an adult - surely if you are being bullied, you just speak up? But different personalities i guess

I can understand not speaking up if you don't want to draw attention to yourself, everyone responds to situations differently. Some people go right into their shell in any conflict, others fly right off the handle.

I do think there are some people out there these days in work environments who can only accept positive feedback and consider anything else as bullying or some kind of personal affront.
 
I can understand not speaking up if you don't want to draw attention to yourself, everyone responds to situations differently. Some people go right into their shell in any conflict, others fly right off the handle.

I do think there are some people out there these days in work environments who can only accept positive feedback and consider anything else as bullying or some kind of personal affront.

My general response is to keep it all inside- sulk and/or act passively aggressive. Im not assertive at all, and i know thats a problem.

At school we have a team dedicated to go to, if this kind of thing is happening. So i'd probably approach them if someone was really bullying me.
 
thought of Ioppolo yesterday when someone mentioned an identical situation ( no homo )



Made macpotata wanna go old school and belt the school yard bully. Sometimes it's what they need/deserve although obviously you can't go around smashing people. What makes it hard is certain people are high up+ well connected so it's hard to get justice. So what does one do when these people are in positions of power?


very interesting. I'd like to hear more from people's experiences.
 
My old job I was forced to work copious amounts of unpaid overtime because of too much work and too little staff, the ones we had either kept quitting or being put off (went through nearly 100 in just over ten years).
Threatened to go to the Unions and was told by a manager that said company doesn't like workers joining Unions as it would be seen as rocking the boat and that would have consequences! "You will not join Unions!" I was threatened.
I had a calendar on the wall in the office some years back which had in blue ink, the paid hours I worked and in red ink below, the number of hours each day I'd worked unpaid overtime and was ordered to throw the calendar out because it could paint the company in a bad light if anyone saw it!! 🙄 Was in a locked, private office by the way.
One girl, who was a Labour Hire worker, had been forced to use a vacuum that was obviously faulty and kept sparking, she threatened to go to Workplace Safety and she was let go the very next day, another was deemed by the same manager to be too fat to fit behind doors to clean them and was let go.
It was absolutely incredible.
We had others stealing from the place that were moved on, others caused nothing but trouble, others only turning up when they felt like it - trouble was the company wouldn't bother to get fill ins or replacements and if we wanted to go on holidays, we would have to find our own replacements, get them to sign up with this Labour Hire company, bring them in for an induction and then hope to God they were any good! Usually it was the same manager who started employing her own friends and relatives and allowed them to get away with all kinds of stuff.
Had one that had the same relatives dying over and over (so had to stay home that day), had the front window in her house blow in eight times, had a terrible attack of gastro on the bus, just as it was getting into town and so had to go back home again (usually 5 minutes before starting time) about 20 times.
Later on we had one Labour Hire worker come in, who then started bringing her daughter in law in to help out, had to sign her up as well, then brought in her own daughter who was literally the dumbest individual I've ever had the misfortune to meet and she started making up her own rules and telling the others what they can do and don't have to do!
When she got pulled up on it she got very nasty, eventually she bullied her daughter and daughter in law into making a harrassment complaint against me after finding out I'd gone much, much higher to complain about their behaviour, their constant claiming of working fradulent hours when they weren't even on site, refusal to do jobs they'd been instructed to perform, then I'd have to deal with the inevitable complaints and try to do these jobs myself in my own lunch breaks.
Seven month investigation in which I threatened to sue the company, the Labour Hire firm and the three individuals for damages, company wouldn't deal with it and put it out to some so-called "independent umpire" (who was paid by the company mind you).
What a hatchet job that was. Mistakes and deliberate fudging of facts left, right and centre.
I later found out several others interviewed by this so-called "independent umpire" had also had several issues with sloppy mistakes bordering on blatant misstyping of what they'd said.
On more than one occasion it was said to me, it seems like this guy's trying to frame you as guilty before we even answer a question and if he doesn't get the answers he wants, he rewrites it to appear that way anyway!
I then had to go back and work in that place at a different time slot as I wouldn't work with anyone after that as, as I said to them at the time, who protects me? I can order someone to do a job, they don't like it, they claim harrassment against me!
On top of all of that, they paid me for a 5:30 to 12:15am shift instead of the 11pm to 5:45am shift I was forced to work on.

What a ****ing nightmare! I could write a Thesauras on the shit I went through with that place!
Local Council!
No wonder my health went so bad, I almost died from a stress related illness a year ago.
 

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My old job I was forced to work copious amounts of unpaid overtime because of too much work and too little staff, the ones we had either kept quitting or being put off (went through nearly 100 in just over ten years).
Threatened to go to the Unions and was told by a manager that said company doesn't like workers joining Unions as it would be seen as rocking the boat and that would have consequences! "You will not join Unions!" I was threatened.
I had a calendar on the wall in the office some years back which had in blue ink, the paid hours I worked and in red ink below, the number of hours each day I'd worked unpaid overtime and was ordered to throw the calendar out because it could paint the company in a bad light if anyone saw it!! 🙄 Was in a locked, private office by the way.
One girl, who was a Labour Hire worker, had been forced to use a vacuum that was obviously faulty and kept sparking, she threatened to go to Workplace Safety and she was let go the very next day, another was deemed by the same manager to be too fat to fit behind doors to clean them and was let go.
It was absolutely incredible.
We had others stealing from the place that were moved on, others caused nothing but trouble, others only turning up when they felt like it - trouble was the company wouldn't bother to get fill ins or replacements and if we wanted to go on holidays, we would have to find our own replacements, get them to sign up with this Labour Hire company, bring them in for an induction and then hope to God they were any good! Usually it was the same manager who started employing her own friends and relatives and allowed them to get away with all kinds of stuff.
Had one that had the same relatives dying over and over (so had to stay home that day), had the front window in her house blow in eight times, had a terrible attack of gastro on the bus, just as it was getting into town and so had to go back home again (usually 5 minutes before starting time) about 20 times.
Later on we had one Labour Hire worker come in, who then started bringing her daughter in law in to help out, had to sign her up as well, then brought in her own daughter who was literally the dumbest individual I've ever had the misfortune to meet and she started making up her own rules and telling the others what they can do and don't have to do!
When she got pulled up on it she got very nasty, eventually she bullied her daughter and daughter in law into making a harrassment complaint against me after finding out I'd gone much, much higher to complain about their behaviour, their constant claiming of working fradulent hours when they weren't even on site, refusal to do jobs they'd been instructed to perform, then I'd have to deal with the inevitable complaints and try to do these jobs myself in my own lunch breaks.
Seven month investigation in which I threatened to sue the company, the Labour Hire firm and the three individuals for damages, company wouldn't deal with it and put it out to some so-called "independent umpire" (who was paid by the company mind you).
What a hatchet job that was. Mistakes and deliberate fudging of facts left, right and centre.
I later found out several others interviewed by this so-called "independent umpire" had also had several issues with sloppy mistakes bordering on blatant misstyping of what they'd said.
On more than one occasion it was said to me, it seems like this guy's trying to frame you as guilty before we even answer a question and if he doesn't get the answers he wants, he rewrites it to appear that way anyway!
I then had to go back and work in that place at a different time slot as I wouldn't work with anyone after that as, as I said to them at the time, who protects me? I can order someone to do a job, they don't like it, they claim harrassment against me!
On top of all of that, they paid me for a 5:30 to 12:15am shift instead of the 11pm to 5:45am shift I was forced to work on.

What a ******* nightmare! I could write a Thesauras on the shit I went through with that place!
Local Council!
No wonder my health went so bad, I almost died from a stress related illness a year ago.
You didn’t consider leaving?
 
You didn’t consider leaving?
Every single day.
Only problem was at the time I was trying to put my kid through school, keep a roof over my head and pay my bills. Not much to go to unfortunately here so I stuck it out. It never improved.
It was only after doing four other people's jobs for several months through the death of one staff member from a heart attack and one other off overseas visiting his elderly mother who was very unwell that I was 12 days into a 22 consecutive day/night shift that I lost my shit with one of the top managers one day who picked and argued non stop.
I then took stress leave and only two days in I had HR ringing me every day trying to get me to resign.
I couldn't take anymore and quit.
 
My old job I was forced to work copious amounts of unpaid overtime because of too much work and too little staff, the ones we had either kept quitting or being put off (went through nearly 100 in just over ten years).
Threatened to go to the Unions and was told by a manager that said company doesn't like workers joining Unions as it would be seen as rocking the boat and that would have consequences! "You will not join Unions!" I was threatened.
I had a calendar on the wall in the office some years back which had in blue ink, the paid hours I worked and in red ink below, the number of hours each day I'd worked unpaid overtime and was ordered to throw the calendar out because it could paint the company in a bad light if anyone saw it!! 🙄 Was in a locked, private office by the way.
One girl, who was a Labour Hire worker, had been forced to use a vacuum that was obviously faulty and kept sparking, she threatened to go to Workplace Safety and she was let go the very next day, another was deemed by the same manager to be too fat to fit behind doors to clean them and was let go.
It was absolutely incredible.
We had others stealing from the place that were moved on, others caused nothing but trouble, others only turning up when they felt like it - trouble was the company wouldn't bother to get fill ins or replacements and if we wanted to go on holidays, we would have to find our own replacements, get them to sign up with this Labour Hire company, bring them in for an induction and then hope to God they were any good! Usually it was the same manager who started employing her own friends and relatives and allowed them to get away with all kinds of stuff.
Had one that had the same relatives dying over and over (so had to stay home that day), had the front window in her house blow in eight times, had a terrible attack of gastro on the bus, just as it was getting into town and so had to go back home again (usually 5 minutes before starting time) about 20 times.
Later on we had one Labour Hire worker come in, who then started bringing her daughter in law in to help out, had to sign her up as well, then brought in her own daughter who was literally the dumbest individual I've ever had the misfortune to meet and she started making up her own rules and telling the others what they can do and don't have to do!
When she got pulled up on it she got very nasty, eventually she bullied her daughter and daughter in law into making a harrassment complaint against me after finding out I'd gone much, much higher to complain about their behaviour, their constant claiming of working fradulent hours when they weren't even on site, refusal to do jobs they'd been instructed to perform, then I'd have to deal with the inevitable complaints and try to do these jobs myself in my own lunch breaks.
Seven month investigation in which I threatened to sue the company, the Labour Hire firm and the three individuals for damages, company wouldn't deal with it and put it out to some so-called "independent umpire" (who was paid by the company mind you).
What a hatchet job that was. Mistakes and deliberate fudging of facts left, right and centre.
I later found out several others interviewed by this so-called "independent umpire" had also had several issues with sloppy mistakes bordering on blatant misstyping of what they'd said.
On more than one occasion it was said to me, it seems like this guy's trying to frame you as guilty before we even answer a question and if he doesn't get the answers he wants, he rewrites it to appear that way anyway!
I then had to go back and work in that place at a different time slot as I wouldn't work with anyone after that as, as I said to them at the time, who protects me? I can order someone to do a job, they don't like it, they claim harrassment against me!
On top of all of that, they paid me for a 5:30 to 12:15am shift instead of the 11pm to 5:45am shift I was forced to work on.

What a ******* nightmare! I could write a Thesauras on the shit I went through with that place!
Local Council!
No wonder my health went so bad, I almost died from a stress related illness a year ago.
I hear ya and I understand.


Absolute dogs and people make their own rules. Maybe I should stand up for you, the Khabib Nurmagamedov way.




( seriously )
 
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Every single day.
Only problem was at the time I was trying to put my kid through school, keep a roof over my head and pay my bills. Not much to go to unfortunately here so I stuck it out. It never improved.
It was only after doing four other people's jobs for several months through the death of one staff member from a heart attack and one other off overseas visiting his elderly mother who was very unwell that I was 12 days into a 22 consecutive day/night shift that I lost my shit with one of the top managers one day who picked and argued non stop.
I then took stress leave and only two days in I had HR ringing me every day trying to get me to resign.
I couldn't take anymore and quit.
That's bullshit man. They're a bunch of criminals.
 
Seriously but maybe I can help out professionally ( not put a hit on them ) although that would be good!


Let me know if I can help out. A few months down the track as things are busy now with Xmas and the New Year. Some times people need a voice + someone to stand up for/with them.




**** these campaigners
 
I've stopped being bullied at work (temporarily) as the person doing the bullying has no support at the top (the person protecting the bully in question left the company). Now the bully is being as nice as pie...... funny that!!

My advice to them is to just walk away/ignore and dont feed them (in the end bully's want a reaction). If it gets to a point, especially the step brother - kick him in the balls (i tell them they will probably get into trouble or he might fight back harder but at some point you have to stand up for yourself)

I was never really bullied at school. I had a few bullies try to, but they moved on fairly quick when they discovered that I wasn't an easy target (I floored one that attempted to punch me).
 

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