Cheating Thread

[neroblack]

I was the goalie in a social game of soccer once, there were no nets on the goal. the other team had a shot and the ref wasn't sure if it went through the goal so he asked me. I said it hadn't even though it really did.

Nice analogy.

 

[The_Wookie]

never cheated. wont even consider it. my girlfriend on the other hand, turns out she was more than a little friendly on the side while i worked nights.
oh well.

 

[bunsen burner]

I porked a bird once for a one night stand and next morning she said she was married!!! I freaked out. Then to make matters worse she wanted to hook up again the next day!

Don't want to gazump your story here but a mate of my porked a girl a few times (he met her on teh interwebz) and she asked him over to a BBQ. He went over there and there were about 5 other dudes there. He got talking to one who also said he met her on the internet. And that he had also porked her. And that the dude cooking the BBQ was her husband. Looks like they wanted to get my mate involved in a "sreaming eagle" whilst the hubby watched from the closet. He made his excuses and left.

 

[fairdinkum]

Never cheated or, to my knowledge, been cheated on, but have been the third party on more than one occasion. In fact, with one girl, I was the third party while she was with one bloke, and then the third party again when she was with the next bloke.

The first guy was a helluva nice guy, too. Had met him months earlier and got along with him really well. In fact, I thought he could do better than her. Kinda funny, looking back.

It would take an awful lot to convince me to give a girl a chance if I knew she'd previously cheated on someone. Almost every cheater I know is a serial offender.

Agree with that, and would add that the serial cheaters I know/knew, were sensational between the sheets.

One serial cheater I knew was an absolute femme fatale and, long story short, she got together with a guy I had known for years, and who I knew well enough to know was a struggler with the ladies. I said then that this poor kent was going to get burned bigtime. Well they moved to the UK together and I recently heard via the grapevine that she had done the dirty on him over there and they had split up. Was always going to happen.

 

[hayes]

I've cheated, been cheated on and been a 'cheatee' with a married woman. I cheated on my girlfriend at the time and surprisingly didn't feel much guilt. It was only a quick make out so that might be why, but I was still surprised. My first long term GF cheated on me (with a mate mind you) but didn't tell me til a few months after and only told me because my mate was going to tell me. My last story is I met up with an ex who was married and we made out a few times. Another time I was asked by a married woman to come home with her but politely declined.

So to sum up, trust noone. The amount of cheating that goes on is staggering.

 

[fairdinkum]

I haven't heard people include kissing as 'cheating' since I was in high school.

 

[MWPP]

I've been cheated on by two people (that I know of), and in both cases, I ended it after I found out (belatedly). IMO, it's a really horrible thing to do to someone (and a deal-breaker for me)- which is why I've never done it, and don't see myself ever doing it. I've never been the cheatee either (that I know of anyway), though I've had opportunities to be.

I haven't heard people include kissing as 'cheating' since I was in high school.

That's a whole new topic in itself though- the definition of cheating!

 

[hayes]

I haven't heard people include kissing as 'cheating' since I was in high school.

It's a tough one. I think the most common definition would be kissing or anything above simply because most people wouldn't like their partner making out with another bloke. Two of those were high school incidents TBH.

 

[magic_johnson!]

Well i certainly wouldn't be happy if my girlfriend thought it was okay to just go around kissing other guys

 

[MWPP]

Well i certainly wouldn't be happy if my girlfriend thought it was okay to just go around kissing other guys

Yeah exactly! (apart from platonic, greet kisses on the cheek etc)
IMO, cheating involves any form of contact (physical or otherwise) that occurs behind your partner's back that
-is something you wouldn't want them to do with someone else or
-is something you know they wouldn't want you to do

 

[magic_johnson!]

However, it's not really something that would enforce a break up that further actions could have. I don't agree that any physical contact can be seen to be cheating, but has to be a disallowed black and white romantic or sexual act with another person.

 

[Igloo]

I would just keep the classification simple. Anything of a sexual nature I would consider cheating.

 

[Simple Jack]

I would just keep the classification simple. Anything of a sexual nature I would consider cheating.

So for example, what about a quick drunk pash?

Not great, but there's a big difference between that and getting down and dirty.

 

[Igloo]

So for example, what about a quick drunk pash?

Not great, but there's a big difference between that and getting down and dirty.

True. There could possibly be a "drunk clause" in there somewhere
I'd probably still classify it as cheating, but less so, I suppose. Some sort of scale would be fitting.

 

[Quivorir]

So for example, what about a quick drunk pash?

Not great, but there's a big difference between that and getting down and dirty.

Still cheating to me.

 

[The_Wookie]

alcohol is no excuse

 

[The Goon]

In that case I'm guilty. Got absolutely hammered one night and started pashing with a girl. Left the club and she asked me to go home with her but had enough sense to say no.

Story got back to the GF, but as is the way with these things the story changed to her knocking me back.

While to my mind it's only sort of cheating, it's mitigated by the fact that I could have done a lot more but "loyally" turned it down, so I don't really feel bad about it.

 

[kfc1]

For me, kissing is definitely cheating. Any girl who did that would be out the door very quickly...

I don't think I actually know anyone well who would be happy for their partner to be off kissing other girls or other blokes.

 

[manureid]

One might be very surprised to find out the amount of seemingly happily married woman who are more than willing and able to partake in extra curricular activities.

 

[hamohawk1]

i think it is bad enough cheating, but imagine if a mother or father undertook it. what message does that send to children in general? On a whole what message does cheating send? we could argue the merits of marriage and if its applicable in society etc. but i think if you undertake marriage you are signing up to the unwritten laws including marriage. what does cheating achieve apart from 5 minutes of pleasure (excuse the pun) leading to the aftermath. can cheating in anyway be deemed rational? if that individual has an awful partner who physically or mentally abuses, i still don't think it is acceptable to cheat, rather be better to leave that partner for their own benefit and then start fresh. we all make mistakes and f*** up but this seems to cross the line

 

[Broken]

Never cheated. Been cheated on once, and it was with a mate. Not fun. It would take an awful lot to convince me to give a girl a chance if I knew she'd previously cheated on someone. Almost every cheater I know is a serial offender.

True. I believe that if they cheat on someone else for you, they will eventually cheat on you. Similarly, if they leave someone else to be with you they will leave you for someone else.
I'd never cheat personally, but have had girlfriends go behind my back a few times, which only enforces my reasons not to cheat.

 

[Kcrack]

True. I believe that if they cheat on someone else for you, they will eventually cheat on you. Similarly, if they leave someone else to be with you they will leave you for someone else.
I'd never cheat personally, but have had girlfriends go behind my back a few times, which only enforces my reasons not to cheat.

I hope not because I know my ex cheated on her ex...with me.

 

[Brad Goodman]

I've cheated once, but it was a cheat-back. The GF was dumb to cheat on me while I was at Uni Games, even dumber to tell me about it before I got back. We re-united when I got back but it only lasted a few weeks after that.

I currently have a married woman sending me raunchy pictures of herself on a very regular basis. Apparently in the last week or so her husband has left her...

 

[fairdinkum]

Kcrack: No offence mate but if you were to find out one day that she had cheated on you, would you accept that you had set yourself up for it? Ergo, would you take responsibility for the position you found yourself in?

I don't have a great deal of sympathy for men or women who get screwed over by people they knew full well had screwed other people over before them.

That's not to say I don't think people can change/learn whatever, and I don't know the first thing about your girlfriend (other than what you have divulged in this thread) so this isn't meant as a go at her or you. In my experience, however, people tend to become less, rather than more, scrupulous as they progress through their twenties.

By that I mean, once people have done something they previously thought themself incapable of (such as cheating on a partner, driving drunk, gaming the system, etc etc), they soon rationalise it (and either accept they are imperfect or, perhaps worse, delude themselves into believing they haven't really done anything wrong at all) and it is much easier for them the next time around.

It is my opinion that the only thing stopping many people from doing 'bad' things is a (imo misguided) belief that they are a good person and good people simply don't make those kinds of mistakes. Once that belief is gone, it is only a matter of when, rather than if, certain mistakes are made again.

 

[MoscowHawk]

Many, many times. On different girls. Over many years now.. It may be due to a different set of morals where I live. It's almost widely accepted here in Russia. Strangely, I would say that most of the ladies I've been with here have had boyfriends/husbands. Not sure if I've ever been cheated on, but I'd say it's very likely. For some reason that does not worry me in the slightest.

Sometimes I ask myself why I bother having a g/f if I do this. But I don't feel at all guilty about it. It's almost bipolar behaviour, where I can separate normal life from the occasional crazy weekend as if it's two different people.

I don't believe it's the right thing to do, but I also cannot live without this variety/stability combination. When you can have your cake and eat it too, it becomes addictive.

Again, perhaps this is more a product of the local culture here...

Is anyone else in the same boat?