Roast * * * D E A T H R I D E 2 0 2 1 * * * (Melb 2nd, Freo 4th)

[Deaneus!]

It's time, baby
​

Melbourne 2nd rounder, Freo's 4th. Freo's 4th rounder isn't going to be any higher than pick 56, so it's a points pick. Melbourne's on the other hand, could be as high as 20.

So our focus will be on the team who
- tanked but didn't,
- who successfully convinced Jake Lever

8

Jake Lever

Age

28

Ht

194cm

Wt

94kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

14.6

4star

K

9.7

4star

HB

4.9

4star

M

5.4

5star

T

1.3

3star

MG

242.0

4star

D

9.6

2star

K

6.5

3star

HB

3.1

2star

M

3.9

4star

T

1.3

2star

MG

145.4

3star

D

16.0

4star

K

11.0

4star

HB

5.0

4star

M

6.6

5star

T

1.6

4star

MG

189.8

4star

he was anything other than average,
- who haven't won a premiership since 1964 (56 years and counting)
- who once voted to merge with Hawthorn (which Hawthorn said, no not with those losers)
- who sponge off the AFL to survive,
- who hired Simon Goodwin

Simon Goodwin

Age

47

Ht

185cm

Wt

86kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

20.9

5star

K

12.1

4star

HB

8.8

5star

M

4.0

4star

T

2.5

4star

No current season stats available

D

9.4

3star

K

7.2

3star

HB

2.2

2star

M

3.0

3star

T

2.2

4star

as a coach despite no evidence he can coach,
- who hired Mark Williams because the club was too stable,
- who've pissed away numerous draft picks in the last 20 years,
- who did this:



and it wasn't even their worst loss:



This is the place to cheer Melbourne's losses this year. Here's to them having a terrible, terrible year

 

[Thetrader15]

Deathriding a 2nd round pick just doesn't quite have the excitement of Giants pick this year!

 

[GrommoT]

Deathriding a 2nd round pick just doesn't quite have the excitement of Giants pick this year!

 

[LiquidCrow]

Doesn't have the same vibe when it's not a first rounder.

#MakeTheDeathRideGreatAgain

 

[dplggr47]

Considering second round started at pick 27 this year, it doesn't have the same excitement as a deathriding first rounder. GC also have their end of first rounder. Add on top any free agent compo picks and father/sons.

 

[CrowCro]

I'm death riding the Crows finishing last and getting us pick one and an assistant pick from the AFL for winning less than 5 games

 

[1970crow]

View attachment 1027556

It's time, baby
​

Melbourne 2nd rounder, Freo's 4th. Freo's 4th rounder isn't going to be any higher than pick 56, so it's a points pick. Melbourne's on the other hand, could be as high as 20.

So our focus will be on the team who
- tanked but didn't,
- who successfully convinced Jake Lever

8

Jake Lever

Age

28

Ht

194cm

Wt

94kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

14.6

4star

K

9.7

4star

HB

4.9

4star

M

5.4

5star

T

1.3

3star

MG

242.0

4star

D

9.6

2star

K

6.5

3star

HB

3.1

2star

M

3.9

4star

T

1.3

2star

MG

145.4

3star

D

16.0

4star

K

11.0

4star

HB

5.0

4star

M

6.6

5star

T

1.6

4star

MG

189.8

4star

he was anything other than average,
- who haven't won a premiership since 1964 (56 years and counting)
- who once voted to merge with Hawthorn (which Hawthorn said, no not with those losers)
- who sponge off the AFL to survive,
- who hired Simon Goodwin

Simon Goodwin

Age

47

Ht

185cm

Wt

86kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

20.9

5star

K

12.1

4star

HB

8.8

5star

M

4.0

4star

T

2.5

4star

No current season stats available

D

9.4

3star

K

7.2

3star

HB

2.2

2star

M

3.0

3star

T

2.2

4star

as a coach despite no evidence he can coach,
- who hired Mark Williams because the club was too stable,
- who've pissed away numerous draft picks in the last 20 years,
- who did this:

View attachment 1027570

and it wasn't even their worst loss:

View attachment 1027565

This is the place to cheer Melbourne's losses this year. Here's to them having a terrible, terrible year

Credit where deserved though. They did get Neil sacked and humiliated us enough last year to finally realise Collective Morons needed to go. This helped lead to the demise of Brett Burton

Brett Burton

Age

45

Ht

185cm

Wt

83kg

Pos.

Fwd

Career

Season

Last 5

D

13.2

3star

K

10.4

4star

HB

2.8

2star

M

6.0

5star

T

1.6

4star

G

2.2

5star

No current season stats available

D

14.4

4star

K

12.0

5star

HB

2.4

3star

M

8.4

5star

T

1.0

3star

G

2.8

5star

and Neil's disciple, Don Pyke.

 

[dplggr47]

I'm death riding the Crows finishing last and getting us pick one and an assistant pick from the AFL for winning less than 5 games

They don't do priority picks anymore. Not unless you ask, and the other clubs agree, but Crows would most likely be turned down.

 

[CROW in BALI]

Choco’s EGO will be in hyperdrive by about mid season and the white anting will start .

 

[SaltPeter]

Choco’s EGO will be in hyperdrive by about mid season and the white anting will start .

I would've thought Yze would be the most likely candidate to replace Goodwin right now

 

[Thetrader15]

I'm death riding the Crows finishing last and getting us pick one and an assistant pick from the AFL for winning less than 5 games

...again

 

[Thetrader15]

They don't do priority picks anymore. Not unless you ask, and the other Victorian clubs agree, but Crows would most likely be turned down.

EFA

 

[flashcrow]

 

[Drugs Are Bad Mackay?]

Deathriding a 2nd round pick just doesn't quite have the excitement of Giants pick this year!

Just means that the humiliation won't be as high as 2018 if the Demons fluke a few wins this year

 

[Crow Envy]

Just means that the humiliation won't be as high as 2018 if the Demons fluke a few wins this year

Who did Melbourne trade in? They’d be due for one of their on years, just like the last time we had one of these threads for them

 

[DangerSloane]

View attachment 1027556

It's time, baby
​

Melbourne 2nd rounder, Freo's 4th. Freo's 4th rounder isn't going to be any higher than pick 56, so it's a points pick. Melbourne's on the other hand, could be as high as 20.

So our focus will be on the team who
- tanked but didn't,
- who successfully convinced Jake Lever

8

Jake Lever

Age

28

Ht

194cm

Wt

94kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

14.6

4star

K

9.7

4star

HB

4.9

4star

M

5.4

5star

T

1.3

3star

MG

242.0

4star

D

9.6

2star

K

6.5

3star

HB

3.1

2star

M

3.9

4star

T

1.3

2star

MG

145.4

3star

D

16.0

4star

K

11.0

4star

HB

5.0

4star

M

6.6

5star

T

1.6

4star

MG

189.8

4star

he was anything other than average,
- who haven't won a premiership since 1964 (56 years and counting)
- who once voted to merge with Hawthorn (which Hawthorn said, no not with those losers)
- who sponge off the AFL to survive,
- who hired Simon Goodwin

Simon Goodwin

Age

47

Ht

185cm

Wt

86kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

20.9

5star

K

12.1

4star

HB

8.8

5star

M

4.0

4star

T

2.5

4star

No current season stats available

D

9.4

3star

K

7.2

3star

HB

2.2

2star

M

3.0

3star

T

2.2

4star

as a coach despite no evidence he can coach,
- who hired Mark Williams because the club was too stable,
- who've pissed away numerous draft picks in the last 20 years,
- who did this:

View attachment 1027570

and it wasn't even their worst loss:

View attachment 1027565

This is the place to cheer Melbourne's losses this year. Here's to them having a terrible, terrible year

I remember watching this game and I turned to my mate 5 minutes in and said Melbourne are going to lose by 150 points today.
Turns out it was massive unders.

 

[Vhaluus]

Deathriding a 2nd round pick just doesn't quite have the excitement of Giants pick this year!

Yep, feels a bit forced.

 

[schmuttt]

Honestly I feel our lack of success over the past two years was because you didn't make this thread like 2018.

 

[Shaz2012]

Honestly I feel our lack of success over the past two years was because you didn't make this thread like 2018.

It didn’t help out last years grand finalists, but to be fair people became pretty disciplined and didn’t post on the GWS death riding thread.

I think it’s safe to post here for the first half of the season. But as soon as you sack your coach I think we need to lock it down.