Dad jokes - add yours

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kool kangas

In Brady we trust...
Sep 2, 2007
4,158
3,341
Burnside
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Other Teams
North Melbourne Vfl
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gokangas

Premium Platinum
Jan 16, 2004
35,533
23,558
Melbourne
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Other Teams
Storm - Victory
My wife just opened my car door for me. It would have been a nice gesture if we hadn’t been going 100kmh.
 

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SonofSamsquanch

00W0W1 1030W0 000W00 W0W200 (Scott Boland)
Mar 31, 2016
9,584
20,334
Victoria
AFL Club
North Melbourne
An angel appears in a puff of smoke to a man and says to him, "Because you have lived a good and virtuous life, I can offer you a gift: you can be the most handsome man in the world, or you can have infinite wisdom, or you can have limitless wealth."

Reflecting, the man says, "I'll take the wisdom"

"Wisdom is yours," says the angel, disappearing in another puff.

The smoke is barely clear before the man thinks, "Damn, I should have taken the money."
 

chairo

Senior List
Dec 22, 2013
239
468
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Apparently this is scientifically the funniest joke on the planet:

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"
 

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