Resource Depression/Anxiety the silent killers - everyday is RUOK day. #SpeakUpStayChatTy

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Sopwiths North

Canadia Roo
Feb 22, 2018
910
4,288
under the stars
AFL Club
North Melbourne
28 is way too young tales129, that's tragic. I'm so sorry. My condolences to you and the others left behind who loved him.
You're right, keep talking to each other everyone. Keep connected, no matter how alone you might feel sometimes.

edit: sorry tales/Val - got my post replies mixed up.
But yeah, stay together for each other, as much as you can.
 
Last edited:

Hojuman

첫 번째 남자 대 남자
May 20, 2012
10,618
27,530
Seoul
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Lost a fella from our 2015 grand final side today.

Poor bugger had been carrying a load for a while - 28.

Very talented sportsman.

Keep talking to each other






Sorry to hear Tales. You don't see the struggle until it's too late. Don't beat yourself up over it or let your mates either.
Get together, talk, remember, laugh along with the tears.
Get someone professional to help the group. They'll help you understand and help you heal.

All here for each-other.
 

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The acurate one

Club Legend
Jan 23, 2019
2,460
10,875
AFL Club
North Melbourne
So I ventured into this thread recently and drew strength from the posts and peoples struggles. Not that you want people to struggle but it showed I wasn't on my own dealing with suffering.

I've been through the wringer of late, had my share of sh*t and I know the universe doesn't give you more than you can handle, well fu** me I must have broader shoulders than I thought.

So my wife decided to leave me ( trial separation) which was the first stab in the heart, add in our kids that I don't really see at all now, so you find yourself alone in a big empty house with plenty of time to ponder WTF happened. Our children are teens and our son is struggling but I cannot make contact as he won't answer my calls, texts, i'm really worried about him, he's quit his job. She pays for him. He also knows I wouldn't be happy with what he's doing.

I had a bit of a meltdown when she told me she wasn't coming back on Saturday and needs to find herself, whatever that means, apparently it might be a sleeve tattoo, I'm not against them of course, but yeah at nearly 50, dunno, each to their own I suppose. But my body started to ache and my eye twitched which is yeah stress and I from my recent past cannot afford to be stressed. I have a short attention span ( think brown Labrador) but I need to find something to keep me focused and or calm for those dark moments that enter my mind.

I had my first day back at work today and I must admit the distraction was fantastic and I am well respected and loved by my team and the wider group. I have a great extended family and a good loyal circle of friends, well except for one couple that seems to have chosen her over me. Have her and my kids there for weekends and I'm never invited. we use to go as a unit and I introduced her to them, many years ago.

Being honest with you all that hurt a lot, I'm a very loyal man and wouldn't have ever done that if the roles were reversed. True friendships don't grow on trees unless of course you're an apple or some such. He isn't really a friend of mine.

So after 26 years of marriage I feel extremely vulnerable and a tad scared. I have a visit on Thursday to Box Hill hospital for a transesophageal echocardiogram, I cannot drive and so have had to organise a cousin to pick me up. My kids cannot do it, that is one of those dark moments, my daughter in fairness does check in on me a bit. She's busy with uni and work I understand that.


So I've been told I should see a councillor due to what I've been through since 17th Oct 2019, I dunno I cannot get my head around parting with money for a certain period of time before ya finished and walk out the door, still with the same things happening in my life.

I think I'd prefer to come on here and spill my heart to well you guys than some qualified shrink.

Anyway, the sun will rise tomorrow and so will I. I have met another attractive woman but this is strictly dinner and sex, yeah I know right. I've a lot to offer someone, but ladies I've got some baggage it would seem:)
 

tales129

Premiership Player
Jul 27, 2006
3,970
5,143
adelaide
AFL Club
North Melbourne
So I ventured into this thread recently and drew strength from the posts and peoples struggles. Not that you want people to struggle but it showed I wasn't on my own dealing with suffering.

I've been through the wringer of late, had my share of sh*t and I know the universe doesn't give you more than you can handle, well fu** me I must have broader shoulders than I thought.

So my wife decided to leave me ( trial separation) which was the first stab in the heart, add in our kids that I don't really see at all now, so you find yourself alone in a big empty house with plenty of time to ponder WTF happened. Our children are teens and our son is struggling but I cannot make contact as he won't answer my calls, texts, i'm really worried about him, he's quit his job. She pays for him. He also knows I wouldn't be happy with what he's doing.

I had a bit of a meltdown when she told me she wasn't coming back on Saturday and needs to find herself, whatever that means, apparently it might be a sleeve tattoo, I'm not against them of course, but yeah at nearly 50, dunno, each to their own I suppose. But my body started to ache and my eye twitched which is yeah stress and I from my recent past cannot afford to be stressed. I have a short attention span ( think brown Labrador) but I need to find something to keep me focused and or calm for those dark moments that enter my mind.

I had my first day back at work today and I must admit the distraction was fantastic and I am well respected and loved by my team and the wider group. I have a great extended family and a good loyal circle of friends, well except for one couple that seems to have chosen her over me. Have her and my kids there for weekends and I'm never invited. we use to go as a unit and I introduced her to them, many years ago.

Being honest with you all that hurt a lot, I'm a very loyal man and wouldn't have ever done that if the roles were reversed. True friendships don't grow on trees unless of course you're an apple or some such. He isn't really a friend of mine.

So after 26 years of marriage I feel extremely vulnerable and a tad scared. I have a visit on Thursday to Box Hill hospital for a transesophageal echocardiogram, I cannot drive and so have had to organise a cousin to pick me up. My kids cannot do it, that is one of those dark moments, my daughter in fairness does check in on me a bit. She's busy with uni and work I understand that.


So I've been told I should see a councillor due to what I've been through since 17th Oct 2019, I dunno I cannot get my head around parting with money for a certain period of time before ya finished and walk out the door, still with the same things happening in my life.

I think I'd prefer to come on here and spill my heart to well you guys than some qualified shrink.

Anyway, the sun will rise tomorrow and so will I. I have met another attractive woman but this is strictly dinner and sex, yeah I know right. I've a lot to offer someone, but ladies I've got some baggage it would seem:)
Sounds like an incredible level of speed humps thrown in along the way mate!

Take solace from the fact that I can say for myself, and probably many around here - that you’re tone portrayed when posting is that of a jovial, lovable individual and I thoroughly enjoy your writ.

What ever you’re battling - whilst however brutal and bleak - is only temporary and they do say, pain ends. For you sir I hope it is in the positive and you can continue to live what seems from the outside a fruitful life.
 

Luke72

Premium Platinum
Aug 21, 2012
3,666
7,260
AFL Club
North Melbourne
So I ventured into this thread recently and drew strength from the posts and peoples struggles. Not that you want people to struggle but it showed I wasn't on my own dealing with suffering.

I've been through the wringer of late, had my share of sh*t and I know the universe doesn't give you more than you can handle, well fu** me I must have broader shoulders than I thought.

So my wife decided to leave me ( trial separation) which was the first stab in the heart, add in our kids that I don't really see at all now, so you find yourself alone in a big empty house with plenty of time to ponder WTF happened. Our children are teens and our son is struggling but I cannot make contact as he won't answer my calls, texts, i'm really worried about him, he's quit his job. She pays for him. He also knows I wouldn't be happy with what he's doing.

I had a bit of a meltdown when she told me she wasn't coming back on Saturday and needs to find herself, whatever that means, apparently it might be a sleeve tattoo, I'm not against them of course, but yeah at nearly 50, dunno, each to their own I suppose. But my body started to ache and my eye twitched which is yeah stress and I from my recent past cannot afford to be stressed. I have a short attention span ( think brown Labrador) but I need to find something to keep me focused and or calm for those dark moments that enter my mind.

I had my first day back at work today and I must admit the distraction was fantastic and I am well respected and loved by my team and the wider group. I have a great extended family and a good loyal circle of friends, well except for one couple that seems to have chosen her over me. Have her and my kids there for weekends and I'm never invited. we use to go as a unit and I introduced her to them, many years ago.

Being honest with you all that hurt a lot, I'm a very loyal man and wouldn't have ever done that if the roles were reversed. True friendships don't grow on trees unless of course you're an apple or some such. He isn't really a friend of mine.

So after 26 years of marriage I feel extremely vulnerable and a tad scared. I have a visit on Thursday to Box Hill hospital for a transesophageal echocardiogram, I cannot drive and so have had to organise a cousin to pick me up. My kids cannot do it, that is one of those dark moments, my daughter in fairness does check in on me a bit. She's busy with uni and work I understand that.


So I've been told I should see a councillor due to what I've been through since 17th Oct 2019, I dunno I cannot get my head around parting with money for a certain period of time before ya finished and walk out the door, still with the same things happening in my life.

I think I'd prefer to come on here and spill my heart to well you guys than some qualified shrink.

Anyway, the sun will rise tomorrow and so will I. I have met another attractive woman but this is strictly dinner and sex, yeah I know right. I've a lot to offer someone, but ladies I've got some baggage it would seem:)
All that on the back of having a stroke! You have really been given a sh*t sandwich. I’m sure in time your kids will come back, as a teenager I reckon most people are just focused on themselves. I know I was. As Tales said you seem upbeat when posting, I hope that proves to be the case in life too.
 

Hojuman

첫 번째 남자 대 남자
May 20, 2012
10,618
27,530
Seoul
AFL Club
North Melbourne
So I ventured into this thread recently and drew strength from the posts and peoples struggles. Not that you want people to struggle but it showed I wasn't on my own dealing with suffering.

I've been through the wringer of late, had my share of sh*t and I know the universe doesn't give you more than you can handle, well fu** me I must have broader shoulders than I thought.

So my wife decided to leave me ( trial separation) which was the first stab in the heart, add in our kids that I don't really see at all now, so you find yourself alone in a big empty house with plenty of time to ponder WTF happened. Our children are teens and our son is struggling but I cannot make contact as he won't answer my calls, texts, i'm really worried about him, he's quit his job. She pays for him. He also knows I wouldn't be happy with what he's doing.

I had a bit of a meltdown when she told me she wasn't coming back on Saturday and needs to find herself, whatever that means, apparently it might be a sleeve tattoo, I'm not against them of course, but yeah at nearly 50, dunno, each to their own I suppose. But my body started to ache and my eye twitched which is yeah stress and I from my recent past cannot afford to be stressed. I have a short attention span ( think brown Labrador) but I need to find something to keep me focused and or calm for those dark moments that enter my mind.

I had my first day back at work today and I must admit the distraction was fantastic and I am well respected and loved by my team and the wider group. I have a great extended family and a good loyal circle of friends, well except for one couple that seems to have chosen her over me. Have her and my kids there for weekends and I'm never invited. we use to go as a unit and I introduced her to them, many years ago.

Being honest with you all that hurt a lot, I'm a very loyal man and wouldn't have ever done that if the roles were reversed. True friendships don't grow on trees unless of course you're an apple or some such. He isn't really a friend of mine.

So after 26 years of marriage I feel extremely vulnerable and a tad scared. I have a visit on Thursday to Box Hill hospital for a transesophageal echocardiogram, I cannot drive and so have had to organise a cousin to pick me up. My kids cannot do it, that is one of those dark moments, my daughter in fairness does check in on me a bit. She's busy with uni and work I understand that.


So I've been told I should see a councillor due to what I've been through since 17th Oct 2019, I dunno I cannot get my head around parting with money for a certain period of time before ya finished and walk out the door, still with the same things happening in my life.

I think I'd prefer to come on here and spill my heart to well you guys than some qualified shrink.

Anyway, the sun will rise tomorrow and so will I. I have met another attractive woman but this is strictly dinner and sex, yeah I know right. I've a lot to offer someone, but ladies I've got some baggage it would seem:)



The sun does rise tomorrow TAO 😉 I had 23 years of marriage no. 1, then 2 years alone before l met Mrs. H. Haven't seen or talked to son from that marriage since 2010.

Everyday seems to last forever, but eventually the time does actually pass and you move on. Sounds easy, but it's not.

Health problems not helping obviously but the people who care will get you through.

Professional help is great if you find the right person 👍 That can be hard but they are out there. Funnily enough the best person l found to help was my G.P.

Keep coming here. We enjoy your insights and commentary and you have family here.
 

LuvtheKangas

Welcome back, Maj
Mar 11, 2006
16,715
35,813
Rising up the ladder
AFL Club
North Melbourne
So I ventured into this thread recently and drew strength from the posts and peoples struggles. Not that you want people to struggle but it showed I wasn't on my own dealing with suffering.

I've been through the wringer of late, had my share of sh*t and I know the universe doesn't give you more than you can handle, well fu** me I must have broader shoulders than I thought.

So my wife decided to leave me ( trial separation) which was the first stab in the heart, add in our kids that I don't really see at all now, so you find yourself alone in a big empty house with plenty of time to ponder WTF happened. Our children are teens and our son is struggling but I cannot make contact as he won't answer my calls, texts, i'm really worried about him, he's quit his job. She pays for him. He also knows I wouldn't be happy with what he's doing.

I had a bit of a meltdown when she told me she wasn't coming back on Saturday and needs to find herself, whatever that means, apparently it might be a sleeve tattoo, I'm not against them of course, but yeah at nearly 50, dunno, each to their own I suppose. But my body started to ache and my eye twitched which is yeah stress and I from my recent past cannot afford to be stressed. I have a short attention span ( think brown Labrador) but I need to find something to keep me focused and or calm for those dark moments that enter my mind.

I had my first day back at work today and I must admit the distraction was fantastic and I am well respected and loved by my team and the wider group. I have a great extended family and a good loyal circle of friends, well except for one couple that seems to have chosen her over me. Have her and my kids there for weekends and I'm never invited. we use to go as a unit and I introduced her to them, many years ago.

Being honest with you all that hurt a lot, I'm a very loyal man and wouldn't have ever done that if the roles were reversed. True friendships don't grow on trees unless of course you're an apple or some such. He isn't really a friend of mine.

So after 26 years of marriage I feel extremely vulnerable and a tad scared. I have a visit on Thursday to Box Hill hospital for a transesophageal echocardiogram, I cannot drive and so have had to organise a cousin to pick me up. My kids cannot do it, that is one of those dark moments, my daughter in fairness does check in on me a bit. She's busy with uni and work I understand that.


So I've been told I should see a councillor due to what I've been through since 17th Oct 2019, I dunno I cannot get my head around parting with money for a certain period of time before ya finished and walk out the door, still with the same things happening in my life.

I think I'd prefer to come on here and spill my heart to well you guys than some qualified shrink.

Anyway, the sun will rise tomorrow and so will I. I have met another attractive woman but this is strictly dinner and sex, yeah I know right. I've a lot to offer someone, but ladies I've got some baggage it would seem:)
Mate, that's a hell of a lot to go through in a short space of time. Not really anything to add to the responses that you've received so far, other than to re-iterate that you're much loved around here so don't you forget it.

Also, there's no excuse for feeling lonely once the season starts as there's always a crowd of us (from here) that get to Melbourne games. You're always welcome to join us. Goes for any others looking to watch, drink and barrack like idiots with a group of clowns who should be old enough to know better.
 

ferball

Premium Platinum
Jul 24, 2015
17,875
33,948
AFL Club
North Melbourne
So I ventured into this thread recently and drew strength from the posts and peoples struggles. Not that you want people to struggle but it showed I wasn't on my own dealing with suffering.

I've been through the wringer of late, had my share of sh*t and I know the universe doesn't give you more than you can handle, well fu** me I must have broader shoulders than I thought.

So my wife decided to leave me ( trial separation) which was the first stab in the heart, add in our kids that I don't really see at all now, so you find yourself alone in a big empty house with plenty of time to ponder WTF happened. Our children are teens and our son is struggling but I cannot make contact as he won't answer my calls, texts, i'm really worried about him, he's quit his job. She pays for him. He also knows I wouldn't be happy with what he's doing.

I had a bit of a meltdown when she told me she wasn't coming back on Saturday and needs to find herself, whatever that means, apparently it might be a sleeve tattoo, I'm not against them of course, but yeah at nearly 50, dunno, each to their own I suppose. But my body started to ache and my eye twitched which is yeah stress and I from my recent past cannot afford to be stressed. I have a short attention span ( think brown Labrador) but I need to find something to keep me focused and or calm for those dark moments that enter my mind.

I had my first day back at work today and I must admit the distraction was fantastic and I am well respected and loved by my team and the wider group. I have a great extended family and a good loyal circle of friends, well except for one couple that seems to have chosen her over me. Have her and my kids there for weekends and I'm never invited. we use to go as a unit and I introduced her to them, many years ago.

Being honest with you all that hurt a lot, I'm a very loyal man and wouldn't have ever done that if the roles were reversed. True friendships don't grow on trees unless of course you're an apple or some such. He isn't really a friend of mine.

So after 26 years of marriage I feel extremely vulnerable and a tad scared. I have a visit on Thursday to Box Hill hospital for a transesophageal echocardiogram, I cannot drive and so have had to organise a cousin to pick me up. My kids cannot do it, that is one of those dark moments, my daughter in fairness does check in on me a bit. She's busy with uni and work I understand that.


So I've been told I should see a councillor due to what I've been through since 17th Oct 2019, I dunno I cannot get my head around parting with money for a certain period of time before ya finished and walk out the door, still with the same things happening in my life.

I think I'd prefer to come on here and spill my heart to well you guys than some qualified shrink.

Anyway, the sun will rise tomorrow and so will I. I have met another attractive woman but this is strictly dinner and sex, yeah I know right. I've a lot to offer someone, but ladies I've got some baggage it would seem:)
Anything you need that we can do just say.
 

dus

Premiership Player
May 14, 2002
4,324
7,443
Poker Table
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Other Teams
Kangaroos
So I ventured into this thread recently and drew strength from the posts and peoples struggles. Not that you want people to struggle but it showed I wasn't on my own dealing with suffering.

I've been through the wringer of late, had my share of sh*t and I know the universe doesn't give you more than you can handle, well fu** me I must have broader shoulders than I thought.

So my wife decided to leave me ( trial separation) which was the first stab in the heart, add in our kids that I don't really see at all now, so you find yourself alone in a big empty house with plenty of time to ponder WTF happened. Our children are teens and our son is struggling but I cannot make contact as he won't answer my calls, texts, i'm really worried about him, he's quit his job. She pays for him. He also knows I wouldn't be happy with what he's doing.

I had a bit of a meltdown when she told me she wasn't coming back on Saturday and needs to find herself, whatever that means, apparently it might be a sleeve tattoo, I'm not against them of course, but yeah at nearly 50, dunno, each to their own I suppose. But my body started to ache and my eye twitched which is yeah stress and I from my recent past cannot afford to be stressed. I have a short attention span ( think brown Labrador) but I need to find something to keep me focused and or calm for those dark moments that enter my mind.

I had my first day back at work today and I must admit the distraction was fantastic and I am well respected and loved by my team and the wider group. I have a great extended family and a good loyal circle of friends, well except for one couple that seems to have chosen her over me. Have her and my kids there for weekends and I'm never invited. we use to go as a unit and I introduced her to them, many years ago.

Being honest with you all that hurt a lot, I'm a very loyal man and wouldn't have ever done that if the roles were reversed. True friendships don't grow on trees unless of course you're an apple or some such. He isn't really a friend of mine.

So after 26 years of marriage I feel extremely vulnerable and a tad scared. I have a visit on Thursday to Box Hill hospital for a transesophageal echocardiogram, I cannot drive and so have had to organise a cousin to pick me up. My kids cannot do it, that is one of those dark moments, my daughter in fairness does check in on me a bit. She's busy with uni and work I understand that.


So I've been told I should see a councillor due to what I've been through since 17th Oct 2019, I dunno I cannot get my head around parting with money for a certain period of time before ya finished and walk out the door, still with the same things happening in my life.

I think I'd prefer to come on here and spill my heart to well you guys than some qualified shrink.

Anyway, the sun will rise tomorrow and so will I. I have met another attractive woman but this is strictly dinner and sex, yeah I know right. I've a lot to offer someone, but ladies I've got some baggage it would seem:)
Maate.

As my favourite and most respected poster on this forum I got drawn to your post in this thread because I follow you.

Whilst is sad and distressing to hear your plight, I know that if anyone can get through it and come out stronger you can.

Respect and best wishes.
 

Kanga Glory

Premium Platinum
Nov 1, 2010
3,188
6,780
arden st
AFL Club
North Melbourne
So I've been told I should see a councillor due to what I've been through since 17th Oct 2019, I dunno I cannot get my head around parting with money for a certain period of time before ya finished and walk out the door, still with the same things happening in my life.

I think I'd prefer to come on here and spill my heart to well you guys than some qualified shrink.

Anyway, the sun will rise tomorrow and so will I. I have met another attractive woman but this is strictly dinner and sex, yeah I know right. I've a lot to offer someone, but ladies I've got some baggage it would seem:)
[/QUOTE]


Stay positive mate, don’t be down on yourself.
I would recommend seeing a councillor (I did when I had issues) and it helped immensely in changing my thoughts and able to spill my beans without been ashamed.
Stay true and be yourself.
Stay connected on here as you have many true friends.
 

The acurate one

Club Legend
Jan 23, 2019
2,460
10,875
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Howdy,

Thanks all
So many guys seem to have ventured down sh*t street before me and have come out the other side. I just hope it isn't the length of the ******* Princess hwy!

Hoju-you're freakin awesome, always thought that. I hope to find your strength

Tales- thank you so much

Luke- Lost me Ma during this period as well

LtK- a big ******* YES!!!!!

Ferball- I'll be in contact

Dus- I'm honoured you follow me and thanks

KG- I think I'll give it a shot ( councillor) I've had lot of sh*t, grew in a brutal household it is I believe why my brother took his own life a few years ago now. And I think it's why I try to be humorous and hide from the reality of the situations I know. I think it is one of the main reasons my marriage collapsed was my lack of compassion for what people feel is a 'tough existence'. They have I thought NFI, but to them it is not good enough I suppose and I need to own that.

Oh never lifted a finger on anyone fwiw, wouldn't do that.

Thanks everyone it was good to just say what I've said. I do feel better about it.


1582093767168.png
 

Hojuman

첫 번째 남자 대 남자
May 20, 2012
10,618
27,530
Seoul
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Howdy,

Thanks all
So many guys seem to have ventured down sh*t street before me and have come out the other side. I just hope it isn't the length of the ******* Princess hwy!

Hoju-you're freakin awesome, always thought that. I hope to find your strength

Tales- thank you so much

Luke- Lost me Ma during this period as well

LtK- a big ******* YES!!!!!

Ferball- I'll be in contact

Dus- I'm honoured you follow me and thanks

KG- I think I'll give it a shot ( councillor) I've had lot of sh*t, grew in a brutal household it is I believe why my brother took his own life a few years ago now. And I think it's why I try to be humorous and hide from the reality of the situations I know. I think it is one of the main reasons my marriage collapsed was my lack of compassion for what people feel is a 'tough existence'. They have I thought NFI, but to them it is not good enough I suppose and I need to own that.

Oh never lifted a finger on anyone fwiw, wouldn't do that.

Thanks everyone it was good to just say what I've said. I do feel better about it.


View attachment 825533



3pmkxp.jpg
 

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Kanga Glory

Premium Platinum
Nov 1, 2010
3,188
6,780
arden st
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Howdy,

Thanks all
So many guys seem to have ventured down sh*t street before me and have come out the other side. I just hope it isn't the length of the ******* Princess hwy!

Hoju-you're freakin awesome, always thought that. I hope to find your strength

Tales- thank you so much

Luke- Lost me Ma during this period as well

LtK- a big ******* YES!!!!!

Ferball- I'll be in contact

Dus- I'm honoured you follow me and thanks

KG- I think I'll give it a shot ( councillor) I've had lot of sh*t, grew in a brutal household it is I believe why my brother took his own life a few years ago now. And I think it's why I try to be humorous and hide from the reality of the situations I know. I think it is one of the main reasons my marriage collapsed was my lack of compassion for what people feel is a 'tough existence'. They have I thought NFI, but to them it is not good enough I suppose and I need to own that.

Oh never lifted a finger on anyone fwiw, wouldn't do that.

Thanks everyone it was good to just say what I've said. I do feel better about it.


View attachment 825533

Good on you, don’t be afraid to talk. Happy to listen 👍
 

Passmore

Brownlow Medallist
May 22, 2001
11,543
26,351
The Gasometer Wing
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Other Teams
Norf
So I ventured into this thread recently and drew strength from the posts and peoples struggles. Not that you want people to struggle but it showed I wasn't on my own dealing with suffering.

I've been through the wringer of late, had my share of sh*t and I know the universe doesn't give you more than you can handle, well fu** me I must have broader shoulders than I thought.

So my wife decided to leave me ( trial separation) which was the first stab in the heart, add in our kids that I don't really see at all now, so you find yourself alone in a big empty house with plenty of time to ponder WTF happened. Our children are teens and our son is struggling but I cannot make contact as he won't answer my calls, texts, i'm really worried about him, he's quit his job. She pays for him. He also knows I wouldn't be happy with what he's doing.

I had a bit of a meltdown when she told me she wasn't coming back on Saturday and needs to find herself, whatever that means, apparently it might be a sleeve tattoo, I'm not against them of course, but yeah at nearly 50, dunno, each to their own I suppose. But my body started to ache and my eye twitched which is yeah stress and I from my recent past cannot afford to be stressed. I have a short attention span ( think brown Labrador) but I need to find something to keep me focused and or calm for those dark moments that enter my mind.

I had my first day back at work today and I must admit the distraction was fantastic and I am well respected and loved by my team and the wider group. I have a great extended family and a good loyal circle of friends, well except for one couple that seems to have chosen her over me. Have her and my kids there for weekends and I'm never invited. we use to go as a unit and I introduced her to them, many years ago.

Being honest with you all that hurt a lot, I'm a very loyal man and wouldn't have ever done that if the roles were reversed. True friendships don't grow on trees unless of course you're an apple or some such. He isn't really a friend of mine.

So after 26 years of marriage I feel extremely vulnerable and a tad scared. I have a visit on Thursday to Box Hill hospital for a transesophageal echocardiogram, I cannot drive and so have had to organise a cousin to pick me up. My kids cannot do it, that is one of those dark moments, my daughter in fairness does check in on me a bit. She's busy with uni and work I understand that.


So I've been told I should see a councillor due to what I've been through since 17th Oct 2019, I dunno I cannot get my head around parting with money for a certain period of time before ya finished and walk out the door, still with the same things happening in my life.

I think I'd prefer to come on here and spill my heart to well you guys than some qualified shrink.

Anyway, the sun will rise tomorrow and so will I. I have met another attractive woman but this is strictly dinner and sex, yeah I know right. I've a lot to offer someone, but ladies I've got some baggage it would seem:)
That’s a rough trot Old Boy. Hopefully the Northeners can give you something to smile about.
 

The acurate one

Club Legend
Jan 23, 2019
2,460
10,875
AFL Club
North Melbourne
I'm not going to hijack the thread, but as things develop I will post about them. I had my heart test today and interestingly the nurses said to me how as a public patient did I get the world renowned head of cardiology to do it.

Easy join the stroke research program and sheesh the world of medicine opens right up:)

Oh I passed with flying colours so yeah one less stress for me to worry about.
 

Hojuman

첫 번째 남자 대 남자
May 20, 2012
10,618
27,530
Seoul
AFL Club
North Melbourne
I'm not going to hijack the thread, but as things develop I will post about them. I had my heart test today and interestingly the nurses said to me how as a public patient did I get the world renowned head of cardiology to do it.

Easy join the stroke research program and sheesh the world of medicine opens right up:)

Oh I passed with flying colours so yeah one less stress for me to worry about.


Who does he barrack for ?
 

The acurate one

Club Legend
Jan 23, 2019
2,460
10,875
AFL Club
North Melbourne
I did larf a chick and the Bulldogs but knew her footy very well , likes the shinboners as she referred to us as. Rough as too, typical western suburbs chick.

But kind and caring I hate to say I may just have developed a soft spot for them.


Hilly- thanks and yeah I'm going for it, if I'm falling off the perch I'm gunna enjoy myself doing it.

Oh I think I put up a pic on my MRI it showed two 'events' this was my second stroke, the first I worked out was 2014 and half my face dropped for about a month. I havent admitted that to anyone.

So yeah ever post needs to be a winner from here on in, I have just about stopped feeling sorry for myself and have about dusted mysef off and are back in the game.

I'm playing the last game of cricket for the year, that will be huge and my oh so tiny in comparison Majak moment . I don't expect to star but a quick fire 45 of about 10 I'd be happy with.

I sent my wife an email offering counselling and apologised for some of my behaviours , she declined but that wasn't the point, it was for me I did it. I felt so much better for doing it.
Go Roos.
 

GunSchwatta

Senior List
Feb 23, 2020
223
316
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Sorry to go to dark for a minute, but I read that most people struggling with suicidal thoughts without acting on them, don’t actually plan out their suicide in advance, like setting a date or whatever. It’s often that those people suicide within about an hour after an incident or a particularly sh*t day.

To be honest that scares the sh*t out of me.

Remember in your darkest moments, no matter how bad, you need to persevere, ride it out. Don’t pass your battle on to other people by taking the easy way out.

Edit- Honestly don’t know how they learned that. My guess is that they’ve interviewed enough survivors by now to see the pattern.
That is exactly how it is Donkey Chop.

I'm the best example of what you (quite rightly) wrote.
 

GunSchwatta

Senior List
Feb 23, 2020
223
316
AFL Club
North Melbourne
For those who struggle with mental illness (like me) as Mastermind said at Christmas time on this thread.

I absolutely hate that time of year due to what my Ex did.

Seeing happy families is heart-breaking.

Don't be like me though and get angry etc, talk to whoever you need to.

Even a random on the street if required as people surprise you in good ways (not all but some).
 

Hojuman

첫 번째 남자 대 남자
May 20, 2012
10,618
27,530
Seoul
AFL Club
North Melbourne
For those who struggle with mental illness (like me) as Mastermind said at Christmas time on this thread.

I absolutely hate that time of year due to what my Ex did.

Seeing happy families is heart-breaking.

Don't be like me though and get angry etc, talk to whoever you need to.

Even a random on the street if required as people surprise you in good ways (not all but some).



Well done mate. We're listening 👍😎
 

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