Resource Depression/Anxiety the silent killers - everyday is RUOK day. #SpeakUpStayChatTy

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Ry009

Premium Platinum
Aug 26, 2002
17,834
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Going to be my hardest week in a long time.
Don't know if I'll be able to do it.
My self sabotaging behaviour has led to a lot of my uni work being due at the same time and I've got a deadline I cant miss.
The stress is killer.
Sorry I just needed to vent.

Hang in there mate. You can only do what you can do.

No need to be sorry either, thats what we're all here for. We've got your back. 👊
 

Gumble Frankieton

Premium Gold
Jul 3, 2007
1,594
4,953
The North
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Going to be my hardest week in a long time.
Don't know if I'll be able to do it.
My self sabotaging behaviour has led to a lot of my uni work being due at the same time and I've got a deadline I cant miss.
The stress is killer.
Sorry I just needed to vent.
I used to find that if I went for a walk in the park as a study break it helped relax me.
Speak to your uni lecturers if you are really struggling, they are generally pretty helpful if you let them know what’s going on. Best of luck with finishing off the work 👍
 

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Shinboner1

Premiership Player
Aug 13, 2020
4,897
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I used to find that if I went for a walk in the park as a study break it helped relax me.
Speak to your uni lecturers if you are really struggling, they are generally pretty helpful if you let them know what’s going on. Best of luck with finishing off the work 👍
At this point it's a case of just get everything done. Trying to get onto study support though. Gonna be a huge week
 

DarkPhoenix

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May 26, 2009
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Hobart, Tasmania
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Going to be my hardest week in a long time.
Don't know if I'll be able to do it.
My self sabotaging behaviour has led to a lot of my uni work being due at the same time and I've got a deadline I cant miss.
The stress is killer.
Sorry I just needed to vent.
Feel you mate.

Got 3 Assignments for Uni due within a week of each other. Then an exam 2 days later.

2 of the assignments are worth 50% of a subject mark each.

Going crazy trying to maintain the high level that I have prior.
 

tales129

Premiership Player
Jul 27, 2006
4,570
6,816
adelaide
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Just got to see my son for the first time in 2 weeks since I left.

an hour down the park, he was up and about jumping and climbing all over things. He’s been getting around with a backpack carrying buzz and woody in it as a sort of security comfort.

got real hard at the end when I had to leave and tell him I was going back to my dads place - he’s 3 and just kept saying stop saying that dad we can’t play if you do that 😭 and he just lost it and his mum had to carry him back to the car.

she shot me such a hardcore look of see what you’ve done

******* very very hard
 

Kanga Glory

Premium Platinum
Nov 1, 2010
5,720
13,726
arden st
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Just got to see my son for the first time in 2 weeks since I left.

an hour down the park, he was up and about jumping and climbing all over things. He’s been getting around with a backpack carrying buzz and woody in it as a sort of security comfort.

got real hard at the end when I had to leave and tell him I was going back to my dads place - he’s 3 and just kept saying stop saying that dad we can’t play if you do that 😭 and he just lost it and his mum had to carry him back to the car.

she shot me such a hardcore look of see what you’ve done

******* very very hard

Stay strong Tales
 

rickety

Norm Smith Medallist
Nov 3, 2007
7,773
16,265
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Just got to see my son for the first time in 2 weeks since I left.

an hour down the park, he was up and about jumping and climbing all over things. He’s been getting around with a backpack carrying buzz and woody in it as a sort of security comfort.

got real hard at the end when I had to leave and tell him I was going back to my dads place - he’s 3 and just kept saying stop saying that dad we can’t play if you do that 😭 and he just lost it and his mum had to carry him back to the car.

she shot me such a hardcore look of see what you’ve done

******* very very hard
Get him something special for his backpack mate :) You know the Twirlywoos? I got my best little mate a big stuffed toy of Great Big Who. Whenever he'd hop in my car, he'd say "Dad, Whos' in my seat". To which I'd reply, "who's in your seat?" And back and forth we'd go. Ever so slowly it gets easier :)
 

7577969923

Norm Smith Medallist
Sep 20, 2018
5,886
15,245
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Just got to see my son for the first time in 2 weeks since I left.

an hour down the park, he was up and about jumping and climbing all over things. He’s been getting around with a backpack carrying buzz and woody in it as a sort of security comfort.

got real hard at the end when I had to leave and tell him I was going back to my dads place - he’s 3 and just kept saying stop saying that dad we can’t play if you do that 😭 and he just lost it and his mum had to carry him back to the car.

she shot me such a hardcore look of see what you’ve done

******* very very hard

That's just awful. You've been trough a lot and are still going through a lot. None of this is easy, it's just sh*t, but you will be a better dad to him if you take care of yourself.

One thing that my friends and my therapist told me when I was in a really tough spot was "be kind to yourself". I feel like this would be a good message for you. I didn't understand what it meant at first ,and it is not easy to do, but it does help. It basically boils down to not trying to find blame in yourself for everything.
 

Kangaroos4eva

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Aug 22, 2012
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Going to be my hardest week in a long time.
Don't know if I'll be able to do it.
My self sabotaging behaviour has led to a lot of my uni work being due at the same time and I've got a deadline I cant miss.
The stress is killer.
Sorry I just needed to vent.
Just checking in to see how you went with your workload and that everything is ok?

Always happy to take a pm or offer some uni specific advice. Been there, done that right through to post graduate level.
 

Ligma

Krakouers favourite poster
Dec 15, 2020
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15,359
AFL Club
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Reading this just dropped a massive weight off of my shoulders. Slowly growing faith back into the justice system
1274D498-E8BF-4DD4-AB5A-C5FA3A477C00.jpeg
 

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Shinboner1

Premiership Player
Aug 13, 2020
4,897
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Been working at the hospital since October, pretty confronting being so close to sick people like I have been. I don't know how the nurses do it; hearing people coughing their guts out all night. Pretty tough people. Glad I'm now working in essential services considering the position I was in 6 months ago but man it's pretty rough sometimes.
 

Event Horizon

Brownlow Medallist
Sep 24, 2002
20,602
10,683
Melbourne
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The death of Harley Balic further reminds us how this can escalate quickly for some people. His parents are saying that he was much better recently and was helping others in the same boat and then all of a sudden tragedy happens. RIP.
 

Val Keating

Brownlow Medallist
Dec 27, 2017
15,866
34,034
AFL Club
North Melbourne
Felt really bad today. I’ve had worse days but today was just one of those days that i just had to put my happy face on and white knuckle it. Caught up with a mate after work and that helped heaps. Just talking sh*t, ribbing each other. Helped a lot because he can laugh with me about the absurdity of what goes through my head.

Its been a bit of a roller coaster since my stay in hospital tbh. It’s the anger at myself that’s the hardest to get over. That feeling or how the fu** did I let it effect me like this. That i can’t get revenge is also something I have to accept.

How the fu** do I get back to myself has pretty much been my goal for over 15 years.

I can’t. Accepting that it’s just part of my story is key.

I feel like if I can just get even with those that have made me this way then I will be cured.

But I know that even if I get that opportunity I’d still feel exactly the same, though dont get me wrong, if the opportunity presented itself I’d 100% take it
 
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rickety

Norm Smith Medallist
Nov 3, 2007
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Felt really bad today. I’ve had worse days but today was just one of those days that i just had to put my happy face on and white knuckle it. Caught up with a mate after work and that helped heaps. Just talking sh*t, ribbing each other. Helped a lot because he can laugh with me about the absurdity of what goes through my head.

Its been a bit of a roller coaster since my stay in hospital tbh. It’s the anger at myself that’s the hardest to get over. That feeling or how the fu** did I let it effect me like this. That i can’t get revenge is also something I have to accept.

How the fu** do I get back to myself has pretty much been my goal for over 15 years.

I can’t. Accepting that it’s just part of my story is key.

I feel like if I can just get even with those that have made me this way then I will be cured.

But I know that even if I get that opportunity I’d still feel exactly the same, though dont get me wrong, if the opportunity presented itself I’d 100% take it
It'll always help yacking with a mate. "Crapping on about the cruise for 2" with a mate or 2 lets your mind think about things differently, imo. Firstly, the conversation, as serious as the topic may be, will be lighthearted and fun, allowing the "serious" aspects of it to diminish, as well as pushing it to the "back of your bonce" for a while.
That bloke from 15 years ago is still there, but he's different. He's battle scarred, tired, angry, wary and weighed down by the expectations of not only what he thinks he should be like, but also by what he thinks others think he should be like. He's older and wiser, but skeptical and cynical. Maybe. But he's still there. The world though, our society has changed. That fella from 15 years ago would be yellow carded all day long, just like just about all of us, for the things we did each day that were the norm, back then.
As for revenge, well, I certainly have no idea of the wrongs committed against you, but from experience, you need to let a few things go, just leave them be and they may just well disappear. Like Greg Chappell snicking those teasing balls just outside off stump years ago. Let a few go, never mind those off drives from whenever before.
The footy starts soon, so that'll be a good opportunity to grab a mate and head down to the Dome and take your mind off things.
Your path is your path mate, get your head up and look about, let a few things go and they days can be better. Take a deep breath, give it the "ah well, doesn't matter" and take a step forward. Or something, imo.
Be well.
 

Lomas

Premium Platinum
Nov 4, 2020
3,112
7,468
AFL Club
North Melbourne
After watching the cricket and chatting to you all on here, unfortunately they played some sort of ‘true crime investigation’ about the death of Chris Cornell.
This type of misery porn has no place on free to air, or any type of, tv.
What they examine on these type of programs is not you, it is just exploiting your empathy and personal feelings.
If it upsets you, reach out. These types of programs should not exist, but you should.
 

blackshadow

Brownlow Medallist
Sep 24, 2007
26,037
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Just a shout out to anyone battling mental demons or depression and hope you are getting the help you need.

This is prompted by the tragic family experience of my cousin.

He turned 51 yesterday and was read his last rites today.

I only had an inkling something was wrong just before Christmas when he called to say he had cellulitis and was having difficulty walking and was going into hospital for a few days.

He's been a highly successful emergency department doctor at a major hospital and from the outside all seemed pretty hunky dory.

His brother called me early in the New Year to tell me he'd gone into intensive care at one of the major Melbourne hospitals and they weren't sure what was wrong with him. But they had him under sedation and on a ventilator.

Turns out he's been battling depression for some time and been on medication and self medicating with alcohol. He kept the depression from most people and completely hid his drinking.

I've since found out that the death of his mum a few years ago seems to have lead to his depression spiralling out of control and upping his drinking.

Turns out that what's wrong with him is that his liver is totally shot from drinking and his kidneys and other organs have shut down and he's been on a ventilator to breathe. He's been moved to palliative care today.

Last time I saw him was about six months ago and from the outside he seemed normal.

This is such a tragic tale.

So look after yourselves.

My mental health is fine so no need to worry about me - but this episode has prompted me to think of anyone struggling and led to me posting here.
 
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blackshadow

Brownlow Medallist
Sep 24, 2007
26,037
38,773
Melbourne
AFL Club
North Melbourne
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Just a shout out to anyone battling mental demons or depression and hope you are getting the help you need.

This is prompted by a tragic family experience of my cousin.

He turned 51 yesterday and was read his last rites today.

I only had an inkling something was wrong just before Christmas when he called to say he had cellulitis and was having difficulty walking and was going into hospital for a few days.

He's been a highly successful emergency department doctor at a major hospital and from the outside all seemed pretty hunky dory.

His brother called me early in the New Year to tell me he'd gone into intensive care at one of the major Melbourne hospitals and they weren't sure what was wrong with him. But they had him under sedation and on a ventilator.

Turns out he's been battling depression for some time and been on medication and self medicating with alcohol. He kept the depression from most people and completely hid his drinking.

I've since found out that the death of his mum a few years ago seems to have lead to his depression spiralling out of control and upping his drinking.

Turns out that what's wrong with him is that his liver is totally shot from drinking and his kidneys and other organs have shut down and he's been on a ventilator to breathe. He's been moved to palliative care today.

Last time I saw him was about six months ago and from the outside he seemed normal.

This is such a tragic tale.

So look after yourselves.

My mental health is fine so no need to worry about me - but this episode has prompted me to think of anyone struggling and led to me posting here.
Post script.

My cousin passed away at 4.10 this afternoon.

Look after yourselves.
 

Luke72

Premium Platinum
Aug 21, 2012
5,408
12,023
AFL Club
North Melbourne
That is tragic, so sad. I have a mate who drank very badly and ruined his liver (or kidneys can’t remember) and now basically gets around in a wheelchair. Alcohol can be really dangerous.
 

Ligma

Krakouers favourite poster
Dec 15, 2020
7,547
15,359
AFL Club
North Melbourne
This might be the wrong thread but I’m not too sure where to put this.

Lately I’ve been getting really bad paranoia that something is watching me (an entity, demons, ghosts, that sh*t) when trying to sleep when being in my own room when the door is closed and it’s dark (for preface I usually go to sleep with my door open until my mum goes to bed and she closes my door)

I have this ritual where I have to have my blanket over my shoulders so something can’t touch me and I’ve been doing it ever since I was little and I refuse to sleep on my back, I also listen to a podcast to help me sleep. But lately my paranoia has gone through the roof and it gets me very anxious to the point where I’m literally sweating.

I feel embarrassed about this as someone my age shouldn’t be scared about silly things like this.
 

Makeshift Park

Team Captain
Aug 6, 2021
343
704
AFL Club
North Melbourne
This might be the wrong thread but I’m not too sure where to put this.

Lately I’ve been getting really bad paranoia that something is watching me (an entity, demons, ghosts, that sh*t) when trying to sleep when being in my own room when the door is closed and it’s dark (for preface I usually go to sleep with my door open until my mum goes to bed and she closes my door)

I have this ritual where I have to have my blanket over my shoulders so something can’t touch me and I’ve been doing it ever since I was little and I refuse to sleep on my back, I also listen to a podcast to help me sleep. But lately my paranoia has gone through the roof and it gets me very anxious to the point where I’m literally sweating.

I feel embarrassed about this as someone my age shouldn’t be scared about silly things like this.
Anxiety manifests in really weird ways. Try not to beat yourself up about it.

I obviously don't know you but you come across as a bright and vivacious person. Its refreshing having someone like you around here.
 

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