Health Depression

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Marklar_33

Brownlow Medallist
Apr 23, 2005
23,303
14,965
Tas
AFL Club
Collingwood
Other Teams
D'Backs, Hurricanes
Hows everyone travelling at the moment?
Having an up phase, the worst part is waiting for the arse to fall out of it again but I’ve had a few things test me and I’ve deflected them. Riding the wave I guess!

Two distinct parts of my life, business and personal. Business is flying, personal is, well, not. So I’m throwing my energy into work as much as I can. Hopefully that helps. Also helps I’m living the free life in Tassie. I really feel for anyone in Vic and NSW right now
 

MannumPower

Can’t count
Dec 15, 2006
18,919
19,900
Mannum
AFL Club
Port Adelaide
Other Teams
Alberton Swamprats, Sunderland
I’m struggling with hating myself and the things I’ve done in the past. I relive them in my head constantly and I can’t let them go. I’m tired of pretending I’m ok . I literally have no friends to talk to. So I talk to my mind and it’s a constant battle.
 

Upgrayedd

A Vote for Clive is a Vote for Justice
Aug 11, 2006
32,478
26,513
Perth
AFL Club
Hawthorn
Other Teams
Timberwolves, Crystal Palace
Im on/off, My self worth is pretty low still. Had a horrid weekend

I've decided to get another job in the same Field. Ive worked with a guy whos straight up lied about something to my boss and my boss has pulled me up on it friday. Said thats absolute horse-sh*t but I dont want to deal with almost bitchy behaviour behind my back. Put me in an absolute funk Friday

Saturday had a date no show, Had been talking for a little while, she cancelled morning last saturday, this saturday gone she just msged me 10m before and said she had just woken up and had a bad headache, asked if she was ok, wanted to change the time, ended up saying just hit me up if you want to try again, Left on *Seen*

Rough. However i've found something in strength training which is really something which is great to focus on and a great little community ive found as well
 

Electronic_Renaissance

I ain't sayin' nothin'!
Mar 25, 2021
2,132
3,799
Omnipresent
AFL Club
Fremantle
Other Teams
Las Vegas Bears
Im on/off, My self worth is pretty low still. Had a horrid weekend

I've decided to get another job in the same Field. Ive worked with a guy whos straight up lied about something to my boss and my boss has pulled me up on it friday. Said thats absolute horse-sh*t but I dont want to deal with almost bitchy behaviour behind my back. Put me in an absolute funk Friday

Saturday had a date no show, Had been talking for a little while, she cancelled morning last saturday, this saturday gone she just msged me 10m before and said she had just woken up and had a bad headache, asked if she was ok, wanted to change the time, ended up saying just hit me up if you want to try again, Left on *Seen*

Rough. However i've found something in strength training which is really something which is great to focus on and a great little community ive found as well
Shocking, I've had this job thing before. Just take the positive side, is this a place you want to work for?

I assume this is the online dating? 10min before? Forget her, I'm sure this isn't the first time she's pulled this stunt.

Look on the bright side, you've dodged two bullets.
 

Perth gal

Premiership Player
Oct 19, 2015
4,610
4,213
AFL Club
West Coast
Had a f’ed up day. Sad and lonely all day. Had a fight with my son. Then couldn’t get on a very important zoom call and felt so angry and disappointed that I jumped in the car and ignored all the calls and messages inquiring why I wasn’t on.
I just wish I wasn’t here.
 

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Perth gal

Premiership Player
Oct 19, 2015
4,610
4,213
AFL Club
West Coast
Had a f’ed up day. Sad and lonely all day. Had a fight with my son. Then couldn’t get on a very important zoom call and felt so angry and disappointed that I jumped in the car and ignored all the calls and messages inquiring why I wasn’t on.
I just wish I wasn’t here.
I feel better today.
 

Marklar_33

Brownlow Medallist
Apr 23, 2005
23,303
14,965
Tas
AFL Club
Collingwood
Other Teams
D'Backs, Hurricanes
What’s going on.?
I was left for another man, after 22 years, then she came back to me and did it all again. That was a year ago on Fathers Day (the second time) and I thought I’d move on but it’s just not going to happen. I’ve made several attempts on my life but fortunately I suppose I have no idea what I’m doing and keep messing it up. Maybe the self sabotage is deliberate. I have a 4 year old daughter I don’t want to leave behind but when I get down I don’t care. Drugs haven’t helped. Psychs haven’t helped. Friends are over it, I don’t care for their opinion anyway as they’re shared friends, all married with young families because that’s who you hang out with when you’re married with a young family. As I’ve said previously, business is through the roof. Sadly, I work alone with my thoughts. I keep pushing through, trying to show her that I’m successful and I’m worth it. That’s my only motivation. It’s in vain. I keep holding out hope that simply doesn’t exist but when that hope runs out…🤷🏻‍♂️
 

Upgrayedd

A Vote for Clive is a Vote for Justice
Aug 11, 2006
32,478
26,513
Perth
AFL Club
Hawthorn
Other Teams
Timberwolves, Crystal Palace
Shocking, I've had this job thing before. Just take the positive side, is this a place you want to work for?

I assume this is the online dating? 10min before? Forget her, I'm sure this isn't the first time she's pulled this stunt.

Look on the bright side, you've dodged two bullets.
thanks dude
Still in my first year, So the plan is to ride it out until the end of the year and hopefully find another workplace
as for the date, yep online, already deleted and blocked it,
 

Perth gal

Premiership Player
Oct 19, 2015
4,610
4,213
AFL Club
West Coast
I was left for another man, after 22 years, then she came back to me and did it all again. That was a year ago on Fathers Day (the second time) and I thought I’d move on but it’s just not going to happen. I’ve made several attempts on my life but fortunately I suppose I have no idea what I’m doing and keep messing it up. Maybe the self sabotage is deliberate. I have a 4 year old daughter I don’t want to leave behind but when I get down I don’t care. Drugs haven’t helped. Psychs haven’t helped. Friends are over it, I don’t care for their opinion anyway as they’re shared friends, all married with young families because that’s who you hang out with when you’re married with a young family. As I’ve said previously, business is through the roof. Sadly, I work alone with my thoughts. I keep pushing through, trying to show her that I’m successful and I’m worth it. That’s my only motivation. It’s in vain. I keep holding out hope that simply doesn’t exist but when that hope runs out…🤷🏻‍♂️
Ok, I know you don’t want to hear it but you’re better off without her.
You need to keep trying with the psychs. Trust me if you get a good one,theyre worth their weight in gold. Please keep trying to get a good one. The right one will help you.
Have you tried support groups, men’s groups? They can be very supportive.
You sound like such a nice person, ive always thought that. Your worth does not hinge on whether this woman wants you or not. You have worth as you are.

Your daughter needs you. Please keep hanging in there.

Last year I visited emergency department 4 times with severe anxiety and depression. I kept trying to find a psychologist, either they were full or just crap. But eventually I found a beautiful one who just gets me and I’m slowly starting to make progress.
You need to find people who will help you see the gold in you. They are out there I promise. Like attracts like.
 
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Deliverance

Brownlow Medallist
Jun 19, 2011
15,442
24,606
MCG
AFL Club
Hawthorn
Another option, and I know it's bloody hard to even contemplate when you're floored, is volunteering with a charity/community service. Great social connection with amazing people and a wonderful sense of purpose.
 

Marklar_33

Brownlow Medallist
Apr 23, 2005
23,303
14,965
Tas
AFL Club
Collingwood
Other Teams
D'Backs, Hurricanes
Ok, I know you don’t want to hear it but you’re better off without her.
You need to keep trying with the psychs. Trust me if you get a good one,theyre worth their weight in gold. Please keep trying to get a good one. The right one will help you.
Have you tried support groups, men’s groups? They can be very supportive.
You sound like such a nice person, ive always thought that. Your worth does not hinge on whether this woman wants you or not. You have worth as you are.

Your daughter needs you. Please keep hanging in there.

Last year I visited emergency department 4 times with severe anxiety and depression. I kept trying to find a psychologist, either they were full or just crap. But eventually I found a beautiful one who just gets me and I’m slowly starting to make progress.
You need to find people who will help you see the gold in you. They are out there I promise. Like attracts like.
It’s ******* hard. Everything I worked towards, gone. I don’t have a plan B. I built a household and a family. I don’t want my daughter growing up between houses like I did
 

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