Divorce

[hamohawk1]

Sorry if this is a touchy subject,

I know of many friends who's parents have gone through a divorce with the impact on all concerned seemingly differing on person to person.

It does come across as a very messy situation for many though with things needing to be divided up not to mention the life change that is apparent with such an event?

I do notice in Australia 1/3 of marriages end in divorce, although the actual rate is dropping in comparison to 20 years ago.

Has anyone been through a divorce or noticed the effects of the event on someone they know?

 

[Catsmaninamerica]

Divorce is moo'd up. I have just had a couple of my best mates go through it. My advice is.

Your kids didn't ask to be born. Unless there is violence or abuse, both parents should IMO work to "fall in live with each other again" and it usual comes at the expense of pride and "being right". Humility is the best thing you can beig to a marriage. It takes time, an ability to work at being a truly forgiving person and being humble but life is hard, marriage includes.

If that doesn't work, try hitting her.

 

[vealesy]

Its pretty simple.

No marriage = no divorce.

 

[Silent Alarm]

Marriage is lame. Why use a ceremony, high school poetry, ring, and piece of paper that's from a religion you (probably) don't even subscribe to? And why pay thousands of dollars for it and invite a bunch of people who you don't really like and they don't really like you... and then pay even more (emotionally and economically) when you realise you hate each other?

 

[Swanny36]

Marriage is lame. Why use a ceremony, high school poetry, ring, and piece of paper that's from a religion you (probably) don't even subscribe to? And why pay thousands of dollars for it and invite a bunch of people who you don't really like and they don't really like you... and then pay even more (emotionally and economically) when you realise you hate each other?

Forever alone

 

[Beary17]

I've been divorced, no kids so it was only finances and pets that needed to be settled. Other then signing the papers and making sure she changed her name back it didn't go any different to a defacto break up really.

 

[DrVanNostrand]

These things happen, that'll be $8.

My parents' divorce was the best thing that ever happened to me. 8 years on, I'm starting to think about taking my mother's maiden surname, but will probably fall into the CBF pile.

 

[Gough]

My parents made each other miserable for 10 years longer than they needed to before they called time on their marriage. Have now been divorced nearly as long as they were married.
Me, I'm still out there fighting for the right to actually get married.

 

[Bunk Moreland]

I do notice in Australia 1/3 of marriages end in divorce, although the actual rate is dropping in comparison to 20 years ago.

I was speaking to somebody who worked in immigration recently, and they were saying this stat is skewed considerably by the amount of “convenience” marriages that are entered into, and then end quickly (ie marrying somebody so they can stay in the country). This makes the divorce rate look much higher than it effectively is.

I wouldn’t have thought it’d have much impact, but they reckon it was a big number. Anyone know? I couldn’t find any figures.

As for divorce itself, yeah it’d be shit. I know one bloke who went through it, it’s basically like a bad breakup, but you can’t just up and leave and start fresh – there’s all the legal, financial and sometimes family things that need to be worked out which makes contact with the other half inevitable and painful.

 

[DrVanNostrand]

Marriage seems like such a prehistoric concept to me, a legal/religious obligation in order for someone to be taken seriously as an adult. Three of my close circle of mates are now engaged (at 21), two with their high school girlfriends and one with a chick he'd only been dating for two months , obviously I hope they all work out, but none have changed my view even slightly on the subject. Thankfully I'm heading overseas soon with two single mates to actually enjoy our youth.

Although my grandparents got married when they were 20 and 19 and are still inseperable well into their 70s.

 

[vealesy]

Forever alone

Nah man.

Real sex doll robots will be here soon enough.

 

[NSWCROW]

My parents made each other miserable for 10 years longer than they needed to .

Wise man once told me - " Misery loves company "

 

[I bleed Blue]

I was once told "IbleedBlue, don't ever get married. Just find a woman that you hate and give her half of your stuff"

 

[Roobs321]

In some societies where women have had a decent standing for a while now (ie. Java), divorce rates have been dropping from their historically high incidence.

I imagine there might be some trend to how high divorce rates fluctuate throughout the westernisation/industrialisation of a society through time. People are starting to marry later, which I think will see high divorce rates drop.

 

[Gough]

Boomers were the first generation to have the no fault divorce, that changed a lot. Societal attitudes towards divorce has softened a lot because of this as well.

 

[mantis]

Has anyone seen Syd, this thread is perfect for him.

OH & divorce sucks, but it's better than staying with an arseh*le.

 

[J_Moore]

Marriage is lame. Why use a ceremony, high school poetry, ring, and piece of paper that's from a religion you (probably) don't even subscribe to? And why pay thousands of dollars for it and invite a bunch of people who you don't really like and they don't really like you... and then pay even more (emotionally and economically) when you realise you hate each other?

Cause weddings are ****ing awesome. Woo party

 

[J_Moore]

My parents made each other miserable for 10 years longer than they needed to before they called time on their marriage. Have now been divorced nearly as long as they were married.
Me, I'm still out there fighting for the right to actually get married.

I'm behind you brother. You have every right to be as miserable as your parents.

 

[Silent Alarm]

A friend of mine's parents got divorced: It cost him $500,000 and five years for it all to be sorted.

Yeah. Such a grounded idea that weddings are...

 

[checkraiseulite]

Probably would've cost him the same amount had they not gone through with the ceremony and continued to live in a de facto relationship.

De facto relationships are now pretty much equivalent to marriages for property settlement purposes.

If you want to keep your stuff, don't move in with any male or female you're in a relationship with whether you're gay or straight (unless you've got the gall to make them pay rent on arms-length terms).

 

[Tiff]

I agree about marriage, but if your thinking is based around avoiding settlement payouts, then you might as well avoid the pussay altogether because even a defacto can take you to the cleaners.

 

[Wright Away]

A friend of mine's parents got divorced: It cost him $500,000 and five years for it all to be sorted.

Yeah. Such a grounded idea that weddings are...

"A friend of mine" The start to 90% of Silent Alarm's posts. Too scared to drive a car.

 

[placebo]

OH & divorce sucks, but it's better than staying with an arseh*le.

Thank goodness your husband got away then, Mantis.

 

[bunsen burner]

Marriage is lame. Why use a ceremony, high school poetry, ring, and piece of paper that's from a religion you (probably) don't even subscribe to? And why pay thousands of dollars for it and invite a bunch of people who you don't really like and they don't really like you... and then pay even more (emotionally and economically) when you realise you hate each other?

I'm all for that shit, but being defacto with kids and splitting up is the same as a divorce. You still gotta cough up half.

 

[Messenger]

A friend of mine's parents got divorced: It cost him $500,000 and five years for it all to be sorted.

Yeah. Such a grounded idea that weddings are...

And I have a work colleague that got dragged through a settlement hearing over a de facto relationship.