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Dumbest crimes thread

  • Thread starter Thread starter JUBJUB
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Now in Brunswick a drunk guy on the piss punching someone would always be a pretty dumb act but probably a pretty standard event.

But when your a police officer, getting drunk than getting into a verbal stoush with the acting sergeant who was driving you home than punching him and sending him to hospital... that's got to be very dumb.

http://www.theaustralian.com.au/new...t-with-colleague/story-fn3dxiwe-1226717354780
 
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JUBJUB said:
I remember a funny crime that happen a few years ago near where I live.There use to be a service station next door to the Corio Bay Roadhouse and one day a guy who I went to primary school with years earlier with and lived a couple of blokes away from the servo decided to rob it.Not being that bright an hour later he goes back to the servo to buy a drink.Well guess what,the cops were still there investigating and the idiot was still wearing the same clothes.The attendant recognised him straight away.BUSTED !!!


and of course who could forget this bloke [or really ugly chick] trying to rob the Lara servo last year

http://www.news.com.au/national-new...-service-station/story-fndo4cq1-1226458564571
Click to expand...
LOL some people really struggle
 

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Cops still waiting for jewel-swallowing thief to return rings

X-rays have confirmed two diamond rings worth A$59,000 are sitting in the gut of an alleged jewel-swallowing thief, but there's been no movement at the station.

Police are still waiting for David William Watts to return the jewels he allegedly stole from a jewellery store at a Brisbane shopping centre last Friday.

''The rings are still in situ,'' a police spokeswoman said.

9475996.jpg


www.brisbanetimes.com.au/queensland/diamond-in-the-rough-cops-still-waiting-for-jewelswallowing-thief-to-return-rings-20131204-2ypop.html#ixzz2mUeV0dz2
 
Guy at work the other day told me a good one. His mate is a cop and one night he pulled over a car with 4 people in it. The driver blew over the limit. Then the passenger said, "I should be right" so he jumped in the drivers seat and turned on the car and the cop right away tested him. He failed as well. Then the two backseat passengers each had a go and also blew over. So all 4 of them lost their license in the space of a couple of minutes.
 
I used to work with a bloke that claims when he was younger he broke into a house in Sydney, had a snack, fell asleep on their couch and woke up to the police and the home owners standing infront him........Not really sure to believe him or not. Funny story either way
 
Dan Cooper said:
Cops still waiting for jewel-swallowing thief to return rings

X-rays have confirmed two diamond rings worth A$59,000 are sitting in the gut of an alleged jewel-swallowing thief, but there's been no movement at the station.

Police are still waiting for David William Watts to return the jewels he allegedly stole from a jewellery store at a Brisbane shopping centre last Friday.

''The rings are still in situ,'' a police spokeswoman said.

9475996.jpg


www.brisbanetimes.com.au/queensland/diamond-in-the-rough-cops-still-waiting-for-jewelswallowing-thief-to-return-rings-20131204-2ypop.html#ixzz2mUeV0dz2
Click to expand...
Guess you could say he's a dumb arse
Although when it comes out he'll be a sore arse
 
bkozican said:
I used to work with a bloke that claims when he was younger he broke into a house in Sydney, had a snack, fell asleep on their couch and woke up to the police and the home owners standing infront him........Not really sure to believe him or not. Funny story either way
Click to expand...

Did he find the beds too hard and too soft ? ;)
 
After stepping around a marked police patrol car parked at the front door, a man walked into H&J Leather & Firearms intent on robbing the store.

The shop was full of customers and a uniformed officer was standing at the counter. Upon seeing the officer, the would-be robber announced a hold-up and fired a few wild shots from a target pistol.

The officer and a clerk promptly returned fire, and several customers also drew their guns and fired.

The robber was pronounced dead at the scene by Paramedics. Crime scene investigators located 47 expended cartridge cases in the shop. The subsequent autopsy revealed 23 gunshot wounds. Ballistics identified rounds from 7 different weapons. No one else was hurt.
 

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Queensland has alot of dumb criminals, my new company has a wma file in the shared folder a dumb arse employee reported his car stolen from the companies carpark, which is covered in CCTV footage and clearly showed him break into his car attempt to hotwire it, then running off and coming back with the keys before driving off.

The best bit was that to get to his car he had swipe into the carpark with his company id.
 

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JUBJUB said:
I had to check the calendar after reading this story

http://www.geelongadvertiser.com.au...with-air-jordans/story-fnjbobec-1226800217542

Nope not April 1st,just another from the 'Only in America' files

So anyone that kills someone in a car should sue the car maker.Ditto anyone that kills by a gun.
Click to expand...

Part of the problem with the lawsuit culture is that part of settlement details for some lawsuits is that the corporation who has had to settle gets to publish the narrative of what happens and gets to make it sound completely frivolous so they don't look bad and everyone thinks oh, law gone crazy (for instance, the infamous McDonalds hot coffee lawsuit media releases never mentioned the fact, which came to light much later, that the lawsuit was actually for the fact the heat of the coffee was well, well over boiling and caused 3rd degree burns, not for the fact it didn't say it was hot). Of course, this makes some people think they can get away with all kinds of frivolous crap that has no actual chance in a court of law, beyond settlement being preferable to the prohibitive expense of hiring a competent defence (this being prohibitive is part of why things like copyright trolling is so effective, it just isn't worth spending tens of thousands to fight a dodgy infringement claim you can settle for thousands).
 
A CORIO woman who almost sliced off her partner’s ear during a raging fit of jealousy, came within centimetres of slashing his carotid artery, a court has heard.
Geelong court was told the victim, who later received 22 stitches to the wound, had since reconciled with the offender and the couple were now engaged to be married.
Click to expand...

http://www.geelongadvertiser.com.au...arry-knife-fiend/story-fnjuhoxe-1226830536092

Should be interesting when they go to cut the cake at the wedding.Will the knife end up in the cake or in him ?
 

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