Dwayne ' s**t commentator ' Russell - PART 2 in 3d

[GoodesStuff]

Wonder how long Dwayne has been waiting to use that CLOSE AND THE CIGAR line he used in the last quarter of Geel/Rich yesterday

 

[EFL Boy]

God listening to him on SEN is painful.

1. He has never asked an open-ended question in an interview in his life. Just a mixture of simple yes/no questions where the other person has to come up with more for their answer.
2. He never asks the caller how they are going. It's always "G'day Dwayne, how's it going?" "yeah, good"

 

[TheJanuaryMan]

God listening to him on SEN is painful.

1. He has never asked an open-ended question in an interview in his life. Just a mixture of simple yes/no questions where the other person has to come up with more for their answer.
2. He never asks the caller how they are going. It's always "G'day Dwayne, how's it going?" "yeah, good"

To be fair - and it pains me to say this about Derwayne - it is the most overused opening by a caller to radio. Is the announcer supposed to say "sh*thouse thanks"

 

[matthew_s]

To be fair - and it pains me to say this about Derwayne - it is the most overused opening by a caller to radio. Is the announcer supposed to say "sh*thouse thanks"

and invites the caller to spend 30 seconds answering which is pointless in the context of what the call is usually about

 

[Private Hudson]

To be fair - and it pains me to say this about Derwayne - it is the most overused opening by a caller to radio. Is the announcer supposed to say "sh*thouse thanks"

KB used to say to every caller “ good thanks “ even if they didn’t ask him. Hahaha.

 

[peternorth]

i like it when dwayne (and many others) introduce the next caller and inform and explain to them that they have to be quick because they only have around 10 seconds to go before the new so you have to be quick

caller: hi dwayne, thanks for taking my call...
Cuts to news

 

[Mentallo]

How unlucky today.
Papalia who is a great caller getting paired with this hack.
If you read this during the call Derrrrrwayne just shut up and let him call the game.

 

[killtaker1993]

I despise callers that ask 'How are you? How you going?'. Shut up and get to the point

 

[Calcium]

From the paint

 

[tugga]

KB used to say to every caller “ good thanks “ even if they didn’t ask him. Hahaha.

That’s because he has already said he was good to the first caller and got pissed off being asked every time.

 

[juss]

Too many dance steps last night in the Freo v Port musical.

There is not one other commentator that uses these phrases in footy vernacular, and for good reason.

 

[Dogs Rule]

Too many dance steps last night in the Freo v Port musical.

There is not one other commentator that uses these phrases in footy vernacular, and for good reason.

Some of Richie Benaud's golden rules of commentary (broken by Russell every match).

Avoid cliches and banalities

The Titanic was a tragedy, the Ethiopian drought a disaster, and neither bears any relation to a dropped catch.

Put your brain into gear before opening your mouth.

 

[juss]

2 minutes into the North v Richmond game

"The dance step was great, put them in the spin cycle"

Didn't take long for him to say something cringe.

 

[Big Sauce 21]

He has not stop screaming this game.

 

[George]

"Cheerio to Tommy Hafey, wherever you're watching"

Hafey's been dead 8 years.

 

[Lets Roar like '44]

"Cheerio to Tommy Hafey, wherever you're watching"

Hafey's been dead 8 years.

Tell me he didn’t

 

[killtaker1993]

Cheerio to Harold Holt, Captain Cook, Ned Kelly, Edmund Barton and to all the convicts and crew on the First Fleet, from wherever it is you're watching...

 

[toottoot]

I know he's annoying every game he calls but am I the only person irritated listening to this clown now commentating the Tigers v Roos Game
What with him calling certain players by their full name e.g. Shai Bolton

29

Shai Bolton

Age

25

Ht

176cm

Wt

77kg

Pos.

M/F

Career

Season

Last 5

D

12.3

3star

K

6.9

3star

HB

5.4

4star

M

2.8

3star

T

2.9

4star

CL

1.4

4star

D

12.7

3star

K

9.2

4star

HB

3.5

2star

M

3.0

3star

T

2.7

4star

CL

1.8

4star

D

9.2

3star

K

4.6

2star

HB

4.6

4star

M

2.0

3star

T

2.6

4star

CL

0.0

1star

, Paul Curtis, Luke Davies Uniacke????

 

[The Prosecutor]

"A coat of paint" as it flushes the post.

 

[deanc]

Here's an idea.
Someone needs to contact Billy Birmingham and ask him to undertake a '12th man' version of the AFL commentators. He would have more than enough characters and material to emulate and to take absolute the mickey out of. Imagine 'R rated' over-the-top versions of BT, JB, Huddo, Derrrwayne and of course some Bruce Mc would be good, which he has previously done with his 2000 Olympic parody...

 

[killtaker1993]

Imagine what his dirty bedroom talk is like

 

[HugeJohnson]

"Cheerio to Tommy Hafey, wherever you're watching"

Hafey's been dead 8 years.

Do you remember when he said this by any chance?

 

[Cleavy]

Imagine what his dirty bedroom talk is like

oh baby, as good as it gets

 

[George]

Do you remember when he said this by any chance?

Not sure mate, but definitely 3rd quarter.

 

[killtaker1993]

oh baby, as good as it gets

I'm gonna shake my schlong and bake your bunghole