Dwayne ' sh*t commentator ' Russell - PART 2 in 3d

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Private Hudson

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Mar 31, 2011
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Haven’t had a chance to watch any footy yet. Switch on the Essendon game and Dwayne is there. Ok it’s only a preseason game he can’t be that bad tonight. Can he? Well he can, he definitely can. I had to mute the commentary during the second quarter. I just don’t think I can take another season with him. I can’t do it, he’s finally crushed my gentle spirit.
 

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Pistol Night

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Don't know if it has been mentioned before.... but was watching the new AFL doco and it was talking about Nic Nat and his ruck work... and the sound of Dwayne's voice commentating came on referencing his tap work.... "He's had more palms than Florida" :rolleyes::rolleyes:
If he had of gone with "Done more palm work than Jono Patton" I could maybe get on board with the dickhead
 

juss

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There was a goal kicked over the weekend, I cannot recall by who, however it involved a baulk/running around a player.

It was a nice goal, it was completely ruined by Dwayne yelling "TURKEY JERKEY, SHAKE AND BAKE".
I can't actually think of the audience that he would appeal to?

Edit: found it, Brayshaw vs GWS 4th quarter
 
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Private Hudson

Club Legend
Mar 31, 2011
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There was a goal kicked over the weekend, I cannot recall by who, however it involved a baulk/running around a player.

It was a nice goal, it was completely ruined by Dwayne yelling "TURKEY JERKEY, SHAKE AND BAKE".
I can't actually think of the audience that he would appeal to?

Edit: found it, Brayshaw vs GWS 4th quarter
I was watching that live and the worst part is I didn’t even react to it. That’s what it’s come to... an acceptance of the dribble that comes out of his mouth.
 

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juss

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I was watching that live and the worst part is I didn’t even react to it. That’s what it’s come to... an acceptance of the dribble that comes out of his mouth.
I don't even know what it means though? It's just yelling words that rhyme.

WHAT A GOAL
SHAKE AND BAKE
TURKEY JERKEY
HAT AND CAT
SLIPPER AND FLIPPER
HOKIE POKIE
FRIED PORK NEW YORK

How did we go from the witty wordplay of Dennis Cometti to this guy?
 

matthew_s

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Aug 19, 2013
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How did we go from the witty wordplay of Dennis Cometti to this guy?
The same way Bruce and Dennis went from great commentators to pathetic meme's of their former selves in Dennis' case and Bruce sounding like a sex offender whenever any of his precious' went near the ball.

People remember what Bruce and Dennis were not the pathetic shells of their former selves they became.
 

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Norm Smith Medallist
Apr 12, 2005
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The Pipe has simply turned into an obnoxious dickhead in the last five years or so. I'm so glad he left 3aw, because now I never have to hear him (I like Gerard Healy). Either his head has got fatter, or he just doesn't give a fu'k, so he blurts out whatever he feels like. I had a couple of Hooksey's last shows on tape when he died, so I kept them. Derwayne is on them, because it was January, and he was filling in for Gerard. I listened to some of them a while ago. Dwayne wasn't a dickhead at all back then, or at least he wasn't on air. I guess he had to mind his Ps and Qs because he was relatively new to 3aw
 

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Norm Smith Medallist
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Also, he said on 3aw a couple of years ago that the rumours about him joining SEN were a made up rubbish and a complete joke. My biggest regret is that I didn't have a recording of that. :tongueoutv1: I'm positive it was deleted from the podcasts. I skimmed through a bunch of them twice, and it wasn't there.
 

GREENESHOOTS

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He has taken it up 3 levels this year
A couple of quotes from tonight's game:
Collins drops a mark 'doesnt complete the deal'
'Berry and Lemmens adding some flavour'
'Blasts a bomb inside 50'
'caught by the dacks' said this one about 10 times
'straight down the staples shortest way home'
His commentary is now only dad joke catchphrases.
 
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Pistol Night

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Sep 3, 2019
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He has taken it up 3 levels this year, it is so painful to listen to...
A couple of quotes from tonight's game:
Collins drops a mark 'doesnt complete the deal'
'Berry and Lemmens adding some flavour'
'Blasts a bomb inside 50'
'caught by the dacks' said this one about 10 times
His commentary is now only dad joke catchphrases.
I’d drop my Dad if he ran with any of that
 

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