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The Dice Man said:
I so want to get rid of it but living the last 6 years OS means it's my simplest way of keeping 'up to date' with what people back home, and friends around the world are up too, but I even find that shit boring. Wow you're having a cocktail in Tulum, or attending a bullfight in Spain, or taking selfies at WTC.... Who gives a **** in the end?

This is the irony. I want to stay informed with what people are doing, yet I find myself not giving a shit! No-one has life-changing moments daily, and I dont care for photos of your kids... You shouldnt even do that without their adult consent.

I hate the telephone so it's not like Im going to start calling people to hear how stuff is. I probably call my Mum once a month and even then I lose patience. Yet if I log on to FB, which is becoming once a day for a peek, she will message me almost instantly seeing I am online. Drives me nuts. I didnt log on to have a chat, I logged on as a passive observer.. like 98% of my time on this site. I'm here a hell of a lot, but post little in comparison to how much time I spend scrolling the boards.

I spent hours of the weekend walking my dog in Roman ruins, had lunch next to to an arena more grandiose than the coliseum. I put 20 litres of petrol into a diesel engine and had to get towed off the autoroute and charged 10 euros a litre for replacement fuel, I passed by the mountain some say Jesus was hidden and buried in. This stuff means something to me, my wife and my dog(and her familey(the Wife's)), but I dont post it on FB because why would anyone give a shit?

Instead I post it on BigFooty.

/Silent Alarm like rant.
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wish I could like this twice.
 
Honestly, not complaining here, just sharing a story. My wedding was three weeks ago and when I posted the obligatory 'hey, we got married' message with three accompanying photos, it just cracked 100 likes (well under a quarter of my friends, even including the likes from friends of my wife whom I'm not friends with).

So my question is: why are you friends with me (or perhaps vice versa) if you can't be arsed liking a wedding post? OK a few aren't regulars on Facebook and may not have seen it, but I consider it to be a rule: you're obliged to like a friend's engagement/wedding/preggers/baby post, no questions asked. If you can't, delete them.
 
Why are you so concerned about being Mr. Popular in this scenario? It shouldn't matter how many likes you get in the post, or that you even posted it. The issue is that you are looking for gratification, and it's never cracked up to what you think it will be.

Alternately, are the people that didn't like the post also the people that you didn't invite to the wedding? If you aren't close enough to them to invite them to the wedding, you cannot expect them to like the post.
 

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akkaps said:
Why are you so concerned about being Mr. Popular in this scenario? It shouldn't matter how many likes you get in the post, or that you even posted it. The issue is that you are looking for gratification, and it's never cracked up to what you think it will be.

Alternately, are the people that didn't like the post also the people that you didn't invite to the wedding? If you aren't close enough to them to invite them to the wedding, you cannot expect them to like the post.
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No I'm not complaining. I just found it surprising. Like I said, I think that's a pretty decent test of whether it's worth being friends on Facebook with someone, whether they can be bothered liking one of the 2-5 truly momentous occasions that most of us will have in our lives.

I wouldn't have thought that spending $160 per head equates to taking a second to click on a button. There isn't a budget on likes, as far as I'm aware.

In a roundabout way, I guess I'm saying that my friends is probably twice as big as it needs to be, minimum, and I was always of the opinion that the number of friends I had was on the conservative side.
 
MC Extra Dollop said:
No I'm not complaining. I just found it surprising. Like I said, I think that's a pretty decent test of whether it's worth being friends on Facebook with someone, whether they can be bothered liking one of the 2-5 truly momentous occasions that most of us will have in our lives.

I wouldn't have thought that spending $160 per head equates to taking a second to click on a button. There isn't a budget on likes, as far as I'm aware.

In a roundabout way, I guess I'm saying that my friends is probably twice as big as it needs to be, minimum, and I was always of the opinion that the number of friends I had was on the conservative side.
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Do you give likes to the people who didn't like your posts?
 
TDHawks1 said:
Do you give likes to the people who didn't like your posts?
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As I've said, I'd like a 'we're pregnant!', 'we had a baby!', 'we're engaged!', 'we got married!' post by anyone on my list, even if I hadn't seen them in 15 years, or I've never met their partner. I'm happy for them. Otherwise, why be friends with them?

I'm not the sort to post 'Happy birthday!' to every friend on Facebook to try to get the return comment or like, but I'd say the examples I've given are slightly more important than that.
 
radiojake said:
so... you've just come to the realisation that the whole facebook thing is a facade ?

and it took people not liking your wedding photos for that to happen?
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What's a facade? The good outweighs the bad to me. It's a great way to stay in contact with people that you're inclined to, so you're kept in the loop if something major happens in their life, like, for example, if they just got married.
 

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if you need a facebook page to tell you if your 'friends' got married, then you'd have to wonder whether or not you are really 'friends' to begin with

and I don't mean that in a bad way - people fall out of contact all the time, it's the nature of life - you really only have so much time each day, week, month, year to spend genuine time with people and continue to foster healthy and meaningful relationships

the 'facade' of facebook is the idea that the above doesn't happen or that 'liking' a wedding photo can allow us to pretend that it doesn't

it's like the ultimate form of denial
 
radiojake said:
if you need a facebook page to tell you if your 'friends' got married, then you'd have to wonder whether or not you are really 'friends' to begin with

and I don't mean that in a bad way - people fall out of contact all the time, it's the nature of life - you really only have so much time each day, week, month, year to spend genuine time with people and continue to foster healthy and meaningful relationships

the 'facade' of facebook is the idea that the above doesn't happen or that 'liking' a wedding photo can allow us to pretend that it doesn't

it's like the ultimate form of denial
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It depends what you want out of it. Sure there's the immediate family, maybe five really close friends, partner's family, their really close friends...once you hit your late-20s that's your circle, more or less, the people whom you see at least once a month in a social setting (probably adding a few if you're in a club of some sort).

It goes without saying that they're friends on Facebook, but you would have managed perfectly well with keeping track of what was going on in their lives before Facebook came along.

It's that next group: old sports teammates, friends whom you might see 3-4 times a year, people who live interstate/overseas, old work colleagues whom you were quite friendly with and so on. Peripheral friends, that's really who it's for. There's a reason it started at a university.

It's for people you like and want to stay in touch with, but the realities of life don't make it possible to, in the traditional sense. You'll never be best friends, but you'd like to keep in touch with what's going on in their lives. It's either that, or cull them and never think of them again.
 
MC Extra Dollop said:
No I'm not complaining. I just found it surprising. Like I said, I think that's a pretty decent test of whether it's worth being friends on Facebook with someone, whether they can be bothered liking one of the 2-5 truly momentous occasions that most of us will have in our lives.

I wouldn't have thought that spending $160 per head equates to taking a second to click on a button. There isn't a budget on likes, as far as I'm aware.

In a roundabout way, I guess I'm saying that my friends is probably twice as big as it needs to be, minimum, and I was always of the opinion that the number of friends I had was on the conservative side.
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Yes, you ARE complaining. This is your ego coming out to play. And you want to be noticed and awed by your social media friends.

Your expectations of your friends are different to what they expect to do for you. If that makes sense. The problem with Facebook is that it puts family, close friends, colleauges, acquaintances, old high school / uni friends, randoms you meet at parties, and puts it into one group of people that you expect the same from. This is not the case. The people that probably liked the post that those that you talk to a lot and those that feel something towards the post.

I posted a pic from my 21st a couple of years ago, I didn't invite everyone in my friends list, but I did get likes from people that I could have invited. So what?? You shouldn't care what other people think of you, you are not going to make everyone happy.
 
akkaps said:
Yes, you ARE complaining. This is your ego coming out to play. And you want to be noticed and awed by your social media friends.

Your expectations of your friends are different to what they expect to do for you. If that makes sense. The problem with Facebook is that it puts family, close friends, colleauges, acquaintances, old high school / uni friends, randoms you meet at parties, and puts it into one group of people that you expect the same from. This is not the case. The people that probably liked the post that those that you talk to a lot and those that feel something towards the post.

I posted a pic from my 21st a couple of years ago, I didn't invite everyone in my friends list, but I did get likes from people that I could have invited. So what?? You shouldn't care what other people think of you, you are not going to make everyone happy.
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Thanks, Dr. Phil. You're equating the importance of a 21st to the importance of a wedding, having previously equated the cost of a like to the cost of a guest at a wedding.

Let's try this a different way. What is your definition of someone who's worthy of being a Facebook friend? That's basically the topic.

My definition would be someone who goes to the effort of showing their happiness for you on what a person would typically nominate as the most important day of their life (their wedding and/or the birth of their children).
 

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some people add everyone they have even a tenuous connection with, some people only add their closest friends and family, a lot of people float in between. people use it differently, if you think that liking a stupid ****ing wedding or childbirth post is so important then it sounds like you need to delete most of your friends list. Most people don't give a shit if someone they haven't spoken to in 10 years is getting married, like or no like, and I don't think you're kidding anyone by pretending to actually be happy for them.
 
perthblue said:
some people add everyone they have even a tenuous connection with, some people only add their closest friends and family, a lot of people float in between. people use it differently, if you think that liking a stupid ******* wedding or childbirth post is so important then it sounds like you need to delete most of your friends list. Most people don't give a shit if someone they haven't spoken to in 10 years is getting married, like or no like, and I don't think you're kidding anyone by pretending to actually be happy for them.
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I think you're spot on, but see...that thinking baffles me.

On the one hand, they add everyone they possibly can, on the other hand they don't give a stuff about something as unimportant as a wedding for one of their several hundred (if not thousands) of friends.

Their news feed must consist of like 1-2% of posts that actually interest them remotely.
 
MrKK said:
Thanks to Facebook algorithms there's a fair chance that most of your friends never even saw the post, even assuming they check their feed regularly.
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Something I have noticed when I post a message along those lines and tag my wife, or if she posted something similar and tagged me, it's as though barely any of the friends of the one who is tagged (besides mutual friends) see it, if the likes are any indication.
 
MC Extra Dollop said:
Thanks, Dr. Phil. You're equating the importance of a 21st to the importance of a wedding, having previously equated the cost of a like to the cost of a guest at a wedding.

Let's try this a different way. What is your definition of someone who's worthy of being a Facebook friend? That's basically the topic.

My definition would be someone who goes to the effort of showing their happiness for you on what a person would typically nominate as the most important day of their life (their wedding and/or the birth of their children).
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FYi, my 21st was $95 per head.

As I was saying, anyone can be your friend on Facebook. If you have an issue with your friends on Facebook, that's your problem. Just don't expect the same response from a group of people with different levels of friendship.
 

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