Society & Culture Favourite Idioms

[Captain Jack]

More useless than **** on a bull.

 

[Vecto]

Thread needs this

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Like trying to find a bee in a haystack

 

[Messenger]

Like picking gnat shit out of pepper.

A scruffy looking person earns the tag "looks like he's been pulled backwards through a hedge"

 

[CLUBMEDhurst]

Like picking gnat shit out of pepper.

A scruffy looking person earns the tag "looks like he's been pulled backwards through a hedge"

My mama's take on the same, "the wreck of The Hesperus". Not heard for years.

Use this 'un on occasion: Couldn't organise a shit to drop"

 

[wce4premiership]

Can't make honey out of dogshit.

 

[Hipster Doofus]

Good thread

I heard this one recently somewhere, pissed myself

'I slept like a baby last night..........woke up crying every 2 hours'

 

[Full Wingspan]

Favourite one would have to be "she's seen more pricks than a second-hand dartboard."

 

[HolyRioli]

Happy as a pig in sh*t

 

[Wallaby]

In more sh*t than a werribee duck.

 

[Tairy Greene]

I'd like to bend her over a barrel and show her the fifty states

I don't know what that means.

 

[SugarShane]

I don't know what that means.

It's from a book.

 

[Mancey]

English Bowler Fred Trueman (vale) after being confronted with a particularly slow damp english wicket once exclaimed in his thick Yorkshire accent

"It's lark boolin fookin doonuts at a fookin shiteheap"

 

[JD11]

The farmer always drives when it's necessary to do so.

 

[Lance Uppercut]

The farmer always drives when it's necessary to do so.

what the ****?

 

[Ross Prunster]

'More knobs than a locksmith' describing a few ladies i know

'Damp as a divorcee's dildo' for a bit of rain about

 

[Simple Jack]

'More knobs than a locksmith' describing a few ladies i know

'Damp as a divorcee's dildo' for a bit of rain about

lol'd.

 

[Full Wingspan]

"Up shit creek without a paddle" is also one I frequently use.

 

[Kaladin Stormblessed]

Or "On struggle street"

 

[Lemma]

I read 'in there like swimwear' on these boards recently and I have been using it ever since.

 

[triplejdude]

Dry as a nun's ****

 

[hawker92]

"If it were raining ****s, I'd get hit by a ****" - when things just aren't going your way.

 

[skilts]

When people ask how I am, I say one of three things:

1) I'm on the verge of being adequate. Don't want to overstate it.

2) I'm wonderful, but that's only one man's opinion.

3) I'm disgustingly well (all they hear is, 'disgusting').

After 42 years of being paid to talk to people, I'm a little over it. The thing I've noticed is how rarely people actually listen to your answer to this asinine question.

 

[Fluro Boots]

not sure if it counts as an idiom but 'what i can't reach i spit at' is a favourite.

 

[Northworth]

He is so unlucky if he fell into a barrel full of nipples he would come out sucking his thumb

 

[Cruyff14]

Throwing the toys out of the pram.