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#1
A little tongue-in-cheek humour from Simon Barnes at The Times (UK):

THE really good thing about the decision to hold the World Cup in Qatar in 2022 is that it is unambiguously mad.
It may also be wicked, corrupt, stupid, cynical and all sorts of things like that, but the most obvious thing about the whole business is that it's perfect madness. A strange relief comes from this realisation.
There was once a reader who wrote to me a dozen times a year. I did my best to reply in a sensible fashion, but it was all rather a trial. He then sent me a letter in which he broke cover and revealed himself for all time as mad. I felt the same flood of relief.
I no longer had to deal with him in quite the same way. I no longer had the obligations we have to the sane. So it is with FIFA.
The idea of holding a World Cup in Qatar is so obviously mad that we no longer have to treat FIFA with seriousness. It must be judged from a completely different viewpoint. We no longer have from FIFA the expectation we have of sane people. We no longer have to waste our time looking for rational motives.
There are other clues to the madness of FIFA from this extraordinary voting process. England's bid getting only one vote from a non-English member is pretty crazy - or, at least, utterly blatant in a situation where most sane people would be a little circumspect.
"England's papers proved that we're corrupt, so we won't vote for England." What message does that send out to the world?
Then there was a fine bid from Australia getting only one vote, and a very decent bid from the United States that could only get three. What do these bottom three bids lack that others clearly must have possessed? That three very good bids were barely considered shows a lack of discretion that reveals yet another layer of madness.
The vast and appalling nonsense of the vote reveals FIFA for what it is: a gathering of nasty, mad old men; a bunch who have been driven insane by a certain limited power and a complete absence of responsibility. They are a bit like the Vatican, really, but without the fancy frocks and the need to believe in anything.
And clearly, no one in Fifa believes in sport. There is no sporting reason at all for placing the World Cup in Qatar. There is no serious pretence that any good other than financial will come from this. But these nasty, mad old men have lost whatever faith they once had in the values that football has beyond the financial.
Football is a bringer of joy, football is a thing of union, football is a thing of beauty, football is a bringer of vivid struggles, football is a theatre for heroes and villains, football is a showcase for individual genius, football is a demonstration of corporate resolve - but that no longer matters.
Not to FIFA, for whom the only point in football is money: and from money, power to the mad, unfrocked cardinals of FIFA and the chief loony, Pope Blatter.
But at least we don't have to take the organisation seriously any more. We no longer have to treat its employees as normal people. We are free to treat them as a bunch of muttering tramps, who, for some extraordinary reason, have control of the world's most popular game.
We have to deal with them, if we want to carry on playing football, which is a bit of a bore, but we no longer have to pretend any sincerity.
We can stop bidding for World Cups; we no longer need to have any but the most essential dealings with FIFA.
There is no point in expecting anything good or helpful from people such as these. Might as well expect a rational discussion with Idi Amin.
It all goes to prove an old adage: power sends you mad; absolute power sends you completely barking.
The Times
It may also be wicked, corrupt, stupid, cynical and all sorts of things like that, but the most obvious thing about the whole business is that it's perfect madness. A strange relief comes from this realisation.
There was once a reader who wrote to me a dozen times a year. I did my best to reply in a sensible fashion, but it was all rather a trial. He then sent me a letter in which he broke cover and revealed himself for all time as mad. I felt the same flood of relief.
I no longer had to deal with him in quite the same way. I no longer had the obligations we have to the sane. So it is with FIFA.
The idea of holding a World Cup in Qatar is so obviously mad that we no longer have to treat FIFA with seriousness. It must be judged from a completely different viewpoint. We no longer have from FIFA the expectation we have of sane people. We no longer have to waste our time looking for rational motives.
There are other clues to the madness of FIFA from this extraordinary voting process. England's bid getting only one vote from a non-English member is pretty crazy - or, at least, utterly blatant in a situation where most sane people would be a little circumspect.
"England's papers proved that we're corrupt, so we won't vote for England." What message does that send out to the world?
Then there was a fine bid from Australia getting only one vote, and a very decent bid from the United States that could only get three. What do these bottom three bids lack that others clearly must have possessed? That three very good bids were barely considered shows a lack of discretion that reveals yet another layer of madness.
The vast and appalling nonsense of the vote reveals FIFA for what it is: a gathering of nasty, mad old men; a bunch who have been driven insane by a certain limited power and a complete absence of responsibility. They are a bit like the Vatican, really, but without the fancy frocks and the need to believe in anything.
And clearly, no one in Fifa believes in sport. There is no sporting reason at all for placing the World Cup in Qatar. There is no serious pretence that any good other than financial will come from this. But these nasty, mad old men have lost whatever faith they once had in the values that football has beyond the financial.
Football is a bringer of joy, football is a thing of union, football is a thing of beauty, football is a bringer of vivid struggles, football is a theatre for heroes and villains, football is a showcase for individual genius, football is a demonstration of corporate resolve - but that no longer matters.
Not to FIFA, for whom the only point in football is money: and from money, power to the mad, unfrocked cardinals of FIFA and the chief loony, Pope Blatter.
But at least we don't have to take the organisation seriously any more. We no longer have to treat its employees as normal people. We are free to treat them as a bunch of muttering tramps, who, for some extraordinary reason, have control of the world's most popular game.
We have to deal with them, if we want to carry on playing football, which is a bit of a bore, but we no longer have to pretend any sincerity.
We can stop bidding for World Cups; we no longer need to have any but the most essential dealings with FIFA.
There is no point in expecting anything good or helpful from people such as these. Might as well expect a rational discussion with Idi Amin.
It all goes to prove an old adage: power sends you mad; absolute power sends you completely barking.
The Times

