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Despite some scoffing following the OP it's an interesting topic for a thread. Essendon's biggest rival is Carlton but Carlton's is Collingwood. Both of those teams would say each other. Really it should be North but their lack of fan base is preventing that from happening, very similar to Lakers vs Clippers rather than Liverpool vs Everton. Having said that, if the AFL implemented a "rivalry round" you'd find a Essendon vs North on the fixture.







