Having Kids

[Shell]

Lol wut kids aren't expensive?! Childcare, food, medical, braces, schooling?!?!? That's not expensive???

 

[MrsEddieBetts]

Lol wut kids aren't expensive?! Childcare, food, medical, braces, schooling?!?!? That's not expensive???

I spend like $50 a week on berries alone hahaha

 

[Shell]

I spend like $50 a week on berries alone hahaha

I can sometimes spend only $50 on groceries for an entire week.


Note I said sometimes

 

[Cruyff14]

Yep food, clothing, toys, swimming lessons etc.

 

[nobbyiscool]

I spend like $50 a week on berries alone hahaha

I wouldn't be far off that - I refuse to buy supermarket strawberries, they're usually most of the way to rotten, and supermarket blueberries are pointless, they have none of the sweet tang that I love about them.

If I included the avos and oranges that go in my smoothie along with blueberries and strawberries I'd be a little over 50 bucks a week.

 

[Shell]

Yep food, clothing, toys, swimming lessons etc.

Excursions, camps..

I reckon pocket money would have gone up with inflation.

My standard PM was about $5, may have gone up to $10 when I was a bit older.

 

[MrsEddieBetts]

We pay $40 a week for 2 kids to do swimming lessons
$50 a week for soccer for 2 kids
About $220 for daycare for 4 days x 1 kid
About $30 a week for OSH for 2 days x 1 kid
plus food, clothes, etc etc

 

[revo333]

Two of my three kids are now at the age where they don't rely on me for much and it's actually bittersweet , you want them to grow up and move out but you know your life if going to be seriously empty when they finally do.

I think my parents felt the same way and personally I thought they struggled to accept all of us moving out one by one.

 

[No Quarter]

Yeah if you had healthy kids you're very lucky.

We have had to do IVF and spend probably close to or in excess of $10,000 on my daughter (and that's not including IVF).

Yep, I do consider myself very lucky on that part! Have had friends struggle in this process and feel for anyone that does.

 

[No Quarter]

Lol wut kids aren't expensive?! Childcare, food, medical, braces, schooling?!?!? That's not expensive???

I said with the exception of childcare, understanding that itself is expensive.

Food.. yep, it adds, but it isn't crippling.

Medical - I guess if you have specific issues it could. Braces, yeah, if it happens, I guess?

Schooling - that is dependent on where you send them. If you're worried about finances, the cost of schooling shouldn't be an issue.

 

[Andre]

I think my parents felt the same way and personally I thought they struggled to accept all of us moving out one by one.

Moving out time, is the time, that those who kept their relationship, separate from their kids, going and those that let it wither becomes apparent.

Wandering off topic, but this is when having a partner that could be your friend, if not your partner, IMO, is better than those who hooked up with someone they don't have that much in common with (I don't include friends / school history etc. in this). The excitement / looks etc. all fade and if all you're left with, 20 years down the track, is they are the 'co-parent', unsurprising so many divorces happen around this time.

 

[Shell]

Moving out time, is the time, that those who kept their relationship, separate from their kids going and those that let it wither become apparent.

Wandering off topic, but this is when having a partner that could be your friend, if not your partner, IMO, is better than those who hooked up with someone they don't have that much in common with (I don't include friends / school history etc. in this). The excitement / looks etc. all fade and if all you're left with, 20 years down the track, is they are the 'co-parent', unsurprising so many divorces happen around this time.

Just listening to a story about this on AW (< listening to 3AW on a Sat "things that make me feel old") about a woman who basically did this and ended up divorced. She spoke very well and came across as a very lovely person, but all i could keep thinking "well you've only got yourself to blame really", her relationship basically revolved around the children and that was all.

 

[Gough]

My folks marriage didn't last us moving out of home but in all honesty we'd have all been happier if they'd done it ten years earlier.

 

[revo333]

Moving out time, is the time, that those who kept their relationship, separate from their kids going and those that let it wither become apparent.

Wandering off topic, but this is when having a partner that could be your friend, if not your partner, IMO, is better than those who hooked up with someone they don't have that much in common with (I don't include friends / school history etc. in this). The excitement / looks etc. all fade and if all you're left with, 20 years down the track, is they are the 'co-parent', unsurprising so many divorces happen around this time.

A guy on tiktok who is a relationship coach has some controversial opinions, some I agree and some I don't.

But he is strong on the opinion that your kids should never come first in the relationship.

 

[Cruyff14]

Yep, I do consider myself very lucky on that part! Have had friends struggle in this process and feel for anyone that does.

She has hip dysplasia too, so many expensive medical appointments there too.

Think you're well off the mark in saying they're cheap IMO.

 

[Gralin]

She has hip dysplasia too, so many expensive medical appointments there too.

Think you're well off the mark in saying they're cheap IMO.

I feel like someone who says kids are cheap doesn't do the budget in their house

 

[Gralin]

As another example of kids costing.

We'd be in a 2 bedroom place most likely without kids right now, we were before them.

One of the reasons we stopped at one was we didn't have room for another and couldn't afford a bigger place

 

[No Quarter]

I feel like someone who says kids are cheap doesn't do the budget in their house

Speak for yourself, cos in my situation, you're wrong.

Perhaps I don't itemise what impact they have on bills that apply to the family, but I've had plenty of people go around saying "Please consider just how huge of an impact it has financially on you to have kids"..

My response is not centred around 18 years of expenses, more so the first few years.

 

[No Quarter]

As another example of kids costing.

We'd be in a 2 bedroom place most likely without kids right now, we were before them.

One of the reasons we stopped at one was we didn't have room for another and couldn't afford a bigger place

Yeah okay, that's fair enough. You can look at the expenses of having a bigger car if required, a house with more bedrooms. I guess I probably wasn't looking at it from that perspective, but you make sense. I was more so implying the daily/week to week expenses, not that I live in a 4br house where if I chose to have none or just the 1 I could technically be in a smaller house. Fair enough.

 

[Shell]

Meanwhile little old me, single no kids- have 100% burden of bills + mortgage, gets overlooked all the ****ing time.


But I no complain

 

[Gralin]

Yeah okay, that's fair enough. You can look at the expenses of having a bigger car if required, a house with more bedrooms. I guess I probably wasn't looking at it from that perspective, but you make sense. I was more so implying the daily/week to week expenses, not that I live in a 4br house where if I chose to have none or just the 1 I could technically be in a smaller house. Fair enough.

there are a couple of families at my kids school that are big

and I mean 7+ kids big, like they own two vans and need both to go anywhere as a family big

I have no idea how they do it

 

[Shell]

there are a couple of families at my kids school that are big

and I mean 7+ kids big, like they own two vans and need both to go anywhere as a family big

I have no idea how they do it

You seen that show on SBS?!?! Like 16 kids and counting or something, its British

Is nuts.

And they get no benefits. Dunno about tax breaks tho.

 

[Gralin]

Meanwhile little old me, single no kids- have 100% burden of bills + mortgage, gets overlooked all the ****ing time.


But I no complain

we're about to not be a single income household for the first time in about 12 years, I know what its like

 

[Gralin]

You seen that show on SBS?!?! Like 16 kids and counting or something, its British

Is nuts.

And they get no benefits. Dunno about tax breaks tho.

I know of it but haven't watched it, but I've seen a few episodes of those sort of shows, there are a few big families with TV shows between the UK and US

 

[Shell]

I know of it but haven't watched it, but I've seen a few episodes of those sort of shows, there are a few big families with TV shows between the UK and US

It would drive me insane, just that constant noise.

I feel for their poor neighbours.
(they do seem like a nice enough family tho)