Society/Culture Hildebrand And The Constant Abuse Of Men.

[Chief]

This is why in my mid 40s, after a divorce and being stabbed in the chest by an abusive, alcoholic, mentally ill former partner, i chose to go MGTOW.

After what I’ve been through, I’m the over the gender politics and constantly seeing and hearing this message that somehow ALL men are violent predators.

We aren’t.

And women are more than capable of of violence too.

I have a very cynical view of females generally, but the least I say about that the better.

Nobody is saying all men are violent predators. Although some people are trying to tell us “it’s evolution”, so I guess there actually are some people who believe it.

 

[Contra Mundum]

Now THAT'S something worth posting and discussing!

It actually has some productive value.

All reactionaries hate public protests of all kinds - they are always "counter-productive", "virtue signalling" - of course those things can't be allied to or inspire action. This belief is how the status quo survives mate. I know how it works. I don't know why you felt the need to press me on my volunteer activity but its the sort of petty mean minded bullshit we have come to expect from you Titiana - you do realise Spiked is sponsored by the Koch Brothers? - that would make you a useful idiot

ME ME ME ME ME ME - while the progressives have to prove what concrete steps they are taking - we can get into a self referential wank fest. IF this is not virtue signalling - those words have no English meaning

"It is hardly surprising that the most indignant responses to Titania have come from those within the cult of social justice. A quick search on Twitter will reveal a number of people who are busy proclaiming their indifference to my work by constantly tweeting about it. They are of course entitled to hate the character, to claim they have a telepathic insight into my motivations, and, above all, to find it desperately unfunny. I tend to have a similar reaction when I am being mocked, although I like to think I’m not so entitled as to believe that my particular sense of humour is definitive. Then again, as Titania points out, ‘If you find yourself laughing at comedy, it’s probably not sufficiently progressive’. (to top it all off a quote from myself as the killer point in MY argument)

 

[Echoes]

Nobody is saying all men are violent predators. Although some people are trying to tell us “it’s evolution”, so I guess there actually are some people who believe it.

If we are having a discussion around domestic violence, maybe it’s time we started asking hard questions as to why the police and community service providers across this country are letting down men in the most shameful manner imaginable.

Almost a dozen times I called the police out to deal with her, as when intoxicated she would physically abuse me, emotionally abuse me, damage my home. Self inflicted injuries (bruises from drunk falls etc) began to be strategically used by the women, as she soon realised if she did that automatically I would be issued a protection order and thrown out of my home. Understandable policy in theory, but a lot of innocent men are being thrown out into the street to fend for themselves by police who instinctively believe a man is more likely to successfully fend for himself than a women. Which is true. But * it’s unfair on blokes when they haven’t done anything wrong.

I asked her to leave my home, told her she was evicted (I held lease on property) and still she wouldn’t leave as she had nowhere else to go. Police continually fobbed me off by saying it was a ‘civil matter’.

I’m absolutely certain there attitude would of been different if I was female.

Finally during a mental breakdown from her, in which she claimed I was the man who had sexually abused her as a child, she stuck a knife in my abdomen and this was the result.



Painfully aware of the state of her mental health, and wanting her to get psychological and addiction support, rather than wanting to see her arrested and charged with who knows what, I lied and told the police I had stabbed myself. I think they knew what was going on though.

While she was out of the house I was then able to get her belongings to the police, and file a restraining order.

Very abridged, rushed, version of my story, but it simply shouldn’t of taken that too get a drunk, mentally ill, abusive women out of my home.

 

[Chief]

If we are having a discussion around domestic violence, maybe it’s time we started asking hard questions as to why the police and community service providers across this country are letting down men in the most shameful manner imaginable.

Almost a dozen times I called the police out to deal with her, as when intoxicated she would physically abuse me, emotionally abuse me, damage my home. Self inflicted injuries (bruises from drunk falls etc) began to be strategically used by the women, as she soon realised if she did that automatically I would be issued a protection order and thrown out of my home. Understandable policy in theory, but a lot of innocent men are being thrown out into the street to fend for themselves by police who instinctively believe a man is more likely to successfully fend for himself than a women. Which is true. But **** it’s unfair on blokes when they haven’t done anything wrong.

I asked her to leave my home, told her she was evicted (I held lease on property) and still she wouldn’t leave as she had nowhere else to go. Police continually fobbed me off by saying it was a ‘civil matter’.

I’m absolutely certain there attitude would of been different if I was female.

Finally during a mental breakdown from her, in which she claimed I was the man who had sexually abused her as a child, she stuck a knife in my abdomen and this was the result.

View attachment 687857

Painfully aware of the state of her mental health, and wanting her to get psychological and addiction support, rather than wanting to see her arrested and charged with who knows what, I lied and told the police I had stabbed myself. I think they knew what was going on though.

While she was out of the house I was then able to get her belongings to the police, and file a restraining order.

Very abridged, rushed, version of my story, but it simply shouldn’t of taken that too get a drunk, mentally ill, abusive women out of my home.

I don’t know the details but from what you say it sounds terrible.

Nobody is trying to deny your experience.

 

[Echoes]

I don’t know the details but from what you say it sounds terrible.

Nobody is trying to deny your experience.

It was a nightmare.

Deliberate, wilful, manipulation by the sorts of women we aren’t allowed to talk about without being labelled a chip carrying, embittered MRA....or even more offensively...to have our stories viewed with scepticism or suspicion (you must have done something to her etc) by the same feminists who tell us we have to ‘believe all victims’.

Believe all female victims maybe.

So I’m sorry Chief, but a lot of feminists are denying the experience I and a lot of other men have had.

 

[Chief]

It was a nightmare.

Deliberate, wilful, manipulation by the sorts of women we aren’t allowed to talk about without being labelled a chip carrying, embittered MRA....or even more offensively...to have our stories viewed with scepticism or suspicion (you must have done something to her etc) by the same feminists who tell us we have to ‘believe all victims’.

Believe all female victims maybe.

So I’m sorry Chief, but a lot of feminists are denying the experience I and a lot of other men have had.

They are running off of statistics.

In the case of murder, males are 6 times more likely to be the perpetrator but less than twice as likely to be the victim.

80% of intimate partner murder victims are female. s**t if you're in that male 20% but those are the numbers.

If cops don't have the resources or the skills to figure out what is going on in individual cases, that's another matter.

I don't know about support services but what I have heard is support services for female DV victims are swamped, while male services have a hard time finding victims to support.

It seems to me to be a huge issue and I don't have the answers.

What was your experience in looking for support services?

 

[Echoes]

What was your experience in looking for support services?

Awful.

Once you start down path of keeping a backpack of belongings handy at all times, because you are regularly having to flee your own home, and start having to ring emergency crisis care type contact numbers etc (not financially sustainable to keep paying to stay in hotels 3 or 4 nights a week on top of rent), on the accomodation front, I soon found out there was literally bugger all for men in a similar situation to mine.

As for advocacy....all roads tend to lead to men’s domestic violence helplines etc...where after explaining your situation, you will be met with ‘oh that sounds awful’ and ‘can you move’ etc. And when you ask for some kind of indication on your position in terms of what the hell you are meant to do when you have a 6ft tall drunk angry women, bailing you up in the kitchen and punching you and kicking you...they are very clear...’lay a hand on her, you will be charged’.

Zero referral to anything or anyone who may of been able to provide me with guidance or support on how to tackle the issue properly.

My experience told me there is an abject lack of services and support for men trapped in relationships with violent women.

They just don’t know what to do with you.

 

[Goosecat]

"Despite the feminist rhetoric about male domestic violence, mothers are actually more likely than fathers to neglect and emotionally and physically abuse their children. For instance, figures from the West Australian Department for Child Protection show that of the 582 substantiated cases of child abuse by their own biological parents in 2007-08, mothers were responsible for 73 per cent, while fathers committed only 27 per cent. In Western Australia, mothers are 17 times more likely than fathers to neglect their children. Also, mothers carried out almost 68 per cent of all cases of emotional and psychological abuse committed by parents against their children. Moreover, about 53 per cent of all physical abuse of children, and more than 93 per cent of all neglect cases, were committed by mothers. University of Western Sydney academic Michael Woods informs that the statistics “debunk the myth that fathers posed the greatest risk to their children”. Dr Woods also reminds that “if similar data was available in other [Australian] states it would show similar trends”.

Source: https://www.spectator.co.uk/2018/07/an-inconvenient-truth-about-child-abuse/ (Also accessible at https://www.lifeministries.org.au/an-inconvenient-truth-about-child-abuse/)

This is the stuff that should be front and centre of all the media stories, movements, legislation, university humanities studies, cultural demands etc regarding abuse and violence on the domestic front. It is however an inconvenient truth set. It is these children that will go on to become the affected adults of the future and statistically become the largest single base of abuse perpetrators in that future.
It is an inconvenient and continually incorrectly dismissed and ignored reality, that the true beginnings of abuse within the domestic environment begins and starts, in the main, by vast statistical and evidential number sets, with children being abused by their mothers. It is a terribly misunderstood and misrepresented reality within even humanities fields themselves, the media, governments and society at large today. It is an abhorrent anomaly one can only assume has been able to remain hidden and removed from the public's knowledge through an all encompassing and determined agenda the like of which I struggle to understand. Few of the mostly male protagonists within this thread on either "side" in reality, really understand and completely grasp what that means for their indoctrinated personal belief sets.
For the vast majority of you, everything you think and believe regarding abuse and violence on the domestic front is simply, WRONG! You have been lied to, fooled and mislead in a way that is so heartbreakingly sad, it is difficult for me to reconcile the facts, knowing so many affected children continue to be abused and neglected to this day, whilst the majority of adults wallow in such depths of deceit and unknowing.

 

[skilts]

Is 'Hildebrand' a new line in women's formal wear?

 

[Evolved1]

"Despite the feminist rhetoric about male domestic violence, mothers are actually more likely than fathers to neglect and emotionally and physically abuse their children. For instance, figures from the West Australian Department for Child Protection show that of the 582 substantiated cases of child abuse by their own biological parents in 2007-08, mothers were responsible for 73 per cent, while fathers committed only 27 per cent. In Western Australia, mothers are 17 times more likely than fathers to neglect their children. Also, mothers carried out almost 68 per cent of all cases of emotional and psychological abuse committed by parents against their children. Moreover, about 53 per cent of all physical abuse of children, and more than 93 per cent of all neglect cases, were committed by mothers. University of Western Sydney academic Michael Woods informs that the statistics “debunk the myth that fathers posed the greatest risk to their children”. Dr Woods also reminds that “if similar data was available in other [Australian] states it would show similar trends”.

This is the stuff that should be front and centre of all the media stories, movements, legislation, university humanities studies, cultural demands etc regarding abuse and violence on the domestic front. It is however an inconvenient truth set. It is these children that will go on to become the affected adults of the future and statistically become the largest single base of abuse perpetrators in that future.
It is an inconvenient and continually incorrectly dismissed and ignored reality, that the true beginnings of abuse within the domestic environment begins and starts, in the main, by vast statistical and evidential number sets, with children being abused by their mothers. It is a terribly misunderstood and misrepresented reality within even humanities fields themselves, the media, governments and society at large today. It is an abhorrent anomaly one can only assume has been able to remain hidden and removed from the public's knowledge through an all encompassing and determined agenda the like of which I struggle to understand. Few of the mostly male protagonists within this thread on either "side" in reality, really understand and completely grasp what that means for their indoctrinated personal belief sets.
For the vast majority of you, everything you think and believe regarding abuse and violence on the domestic front is simply, WRONG! You have been lied to, fooled and mislead in a way that is so heartbreakingly sad, it is difficult for me to reconcile the facts, knowing so many affected children continue to be abused and neglected to this day, whilst the majority of adults wallow in such depths of deceit and unknowing.

The suggestion that "mothers are 17 times more likely than fathers to neglect their children" set off my bs detector.

Please provide a link to a peer reviewed scientific study that provides justification for those statistics.

 

[Goosecat]

The suggestion that "mothers are 17 times more likely than fathers to neglect their children" set off my bs detector.

Please provide a link to a peer reviewed scientific study that provides justification for those statistics.

They are true stats mate and my inclusion of verifiable Australian academics names that you can contact yourself should have been a clue. I suspect however judging by your inability to work that out, that no amount of stats or verifiable academics will alter your indoctrinated and unfortunate further example of the problem society and children being abused today face. That "BS Meter" term you use is somewhat ironically appropriate, as that is exactly what you have been fed and continue to believe and espouse, like so many others who think they are enlightened and informed, but in reality have absolutely no clue. You and others like you, are part of the problem our children face today.
Perhaps you can show me some scientific, verifiable study backing up that "BS Meter" you put up as your informed and educated evidentiary base.

 

[Thegibbsgamble]

I don’t know the details but from what you say it sounds terrible.

Nobody is trying to deny your experience.

You did start a thread saying the man should be removed, no matter who is the perpetrator.

Tell him why you did that

 

[Thegibbsgamble]

They are true stats mate and my inclusion of verifiable Australian academics names that you can contact yourself should have been a clue. I suspect however judging by your inability to work that out, that no amount of stats or verifiable academics will alter your indoctrinated and unfortunate further example of the problem society and children being abused today face. That "BS Meter" term you use is somewhat ironically appropriate, as that is exactly what you have been fed and continue to believe and espouse, like so many others who think they are enlightened and informed, but in reality have absolutely no clue. You and others like you, are part of the problem our children face today.
Perhaps you can show me some scientific, verifiable study backing up that "BS Meter" you put up as your informed and educated evidentiary base.

This should shut him up.

https://vancouversun.com/opinion/co...xjbuSB-KF4dXhjnULRAiyut2-1lfJoaA48oaZLL-4cRnI

 

[Snake_Baker]

This should shut him up.

https://vancouversun.com/opinion/co...xjbuSB-KF4dXhjnULRAiyut2-1lfJoaA48oaZLL-4cRnI

I have no problem with that analysis, but that stuff's ignored when it comes to murders.

Men are just better at following through, and that pretty much applies to all aspects of civilisation.

 

[Evolved1]

They are true stats mate and my inclusion of verifiable Australian academics names that you can contact yourself should have been a clue. I suspect however judging by your inability to work that out, that no amount of stats or verifiable academics will alter your indoctrinated and unfortunate further example of the problem society and children being abused today face. That "BS Meter" term you use is somewhat ironically appropriate, as that is exactly what you have been fed and continue to believe and espouse, like so many others who think they are enlightened and informed, but in reality have absolutely no clue. You and others like you, are part of the problem our children face today.
Perhaps you can show me some scientific, verifiable study backing up that "BS Meter" you put up as your informed and educated evidentiary base.

I didn't ask for academic names; I asked for a peer reviewed study.

Most of your reply was superfluous.

 

[Evolved1]

I have no problem with that analysis, but that stuff's ignored when it comes to murders.

Men are just better at following through, and that pretty much applies to all aspects of civilisation.

His link is a clue...vancouversun (news) /opinion (speaks for itself).

An opinion-based news article is more useful as toilet paper than scientific evidence.

 

[ShanDog]

His link is a clue...vancouversun (news) /opinion (speaks for itself).

An opinion-based news article is more useful as toilet paper than scientific evidence.

You'll struggle to find any large-scale or national academic research papers of this nature. They are often small and local. National or state research is usually done by Institutes and organisations like the ABS. They are great at producing raw stats but not at analysing them. Hence writers cherry picking whatever data supports whatever point they want to make.

I can tell you the reality of domestic abuse and child neglect - it doesn't discriminate by gender or colour. It's not any one particular subset of the human race's fault either - everyone is guilty of it.

Where's my research grant?

 

[Evolved1]

You'll struggle to find any large-scale or national academic research papers of this nature. They are often small and local. National or state research is usually done by Institutes and organisations like the ABS. They are great at producing raw stats but not at analysing them. Hence writers cherry picking whatever data supports whatever point they want to make.

I can tell you the reality of domestic abuse and child neglect - it doesn't discriminate by gender or colour. It's not any one particular subset of the human race's fault either - everyone is guilty of it.

Where's my research grant?

I appreciate the reasonable reply. It would be nice to see some deeper analysis untainted by opinion and political bias, but balanced educated views aren't very marketable.

 

[Thegibbsgamble]

His link is a clue...vancouversun (news) /opinion (speaks for itself).

An opinion-based news article is more useful as toilet paper than scientific evidence.

Well, your retort shows your true colours, the link reference mass studies in a number of countries.

Because it shows you, for what you are, you retort in a very extremist way

 

[Thegibbsgamble]

You'll struggle to find any large-scale or national academic research papers of this nature. They are often small and local. National or state research is usually done by Institutes and organisations like the ABS. They are great at producing raw stats but not at analysing them. Hence writers cherry picking whatever data supports whatever point they want to make.

I can tell you the reality of domestic abuse and child neglect - it doesn't discriminate by gender or colour. It's not any one particular subset of the human race's fault either - everyone is guilty of it.

Where's my research grant?

Women kill more kids
Men kill more women
Women abuse more men.
Men kill themselves more as a result of dv.
Women end up in More abusive relationships after experiencing one
More men end up homeless after experiencing dv
Men less likely to report being a victim
Women more likely to substance abuse.
No statistical difference in who brings up more abusers, male of female perpetrators.

No services for men, in fact where males Generally present, Homelessness services, females get priority, despite so many more men.

 

[ShanDog]

Women kill more kids
Men kill more women
Women abuse more men.
Men kill themselves more as a result of dv.
Women end up in More abusive relationships after experiencing one
More men end up homeless after experiencing dv
Men less likely to report being a victim
Women more likely to substance abuse.
No statistical difference in who brings up more abusers, male of female perpetrators.

No services for men, in fact where males Generally present, Homelessness services, females get priority, despite so many more men.

There's definitely a lack of services for men when it comes to DV and other abuse. I think that's slowly changing though.

 

[Scallop Industry Thug]

There's definitely a lack of services for men when it comes to DV and other abuse. I think that's slowly changing though.

A large part of it is the self-enforced gender norms that make men believe they can't talk about this type of stuff.

Re-thinking gender can help men in meaningful ways.

 

[ShanDog]

A large part of it is the self-enforced gender norms that make men believe they can't talk about this type of stuff.

Re-thinking gender can help men in meaningful ways.

Re-thinking gender, or just re-thinking one aspect of a gender stereotype applicable to men? We are already a long way down that road thankfully. It's why male reporting rates for many forms of abuse have steadily increased over the medium term (i.e. last decade or two). Getting there.

 

[Scallop Industry Thug]

Re-thinking gender, or just re-thinking one aspect of a gender stereotype applicable to men? We are already a long way down that road thankfully. It's why male reporting rates for many forms of abuse have steadily increased over the medium term (i.e. last decade or two). Getting there.

Well, society is well on the way to re-thinkinh how young men deal with conflict with others, mental health and us as emotional beings.

 

[ShanDog]

Well, society is well on the way to re-thinkinh how young men deal with conflict with others, mental health and us as emotional beings.

Yep and that's a great thing. I just involuntarily raise an eyebrow whenever there is a whiff of blank slate or social constructionist ideas that are overreaching.