Discussion Mental Illness (Call Beyond Blue (1300 224 636), Lifeline (131 114))

st_trav_ofWA

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Aug 17, 2015
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Mental Health is a huge issue but one that we are slowly getting better at addressing. It was a huge focus at the club I was involved in for the last 5 years after the club lost 3 people to suicide about 10 ago.

Club has its own mental health fund to anonymously support anyone within the club network that needs help.

The players even put this video together to help create awareness.

Great to see it being spoken about on here - look after youselves and each other people.

thats great to see your club do that ... i think groups like that can be really helpful in breaking down the stigma of it
 

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karaoke

Norm Smith Medallist
Mar 26, 2013
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I've been tossing up whether to post on this issue but you've coaxed me out BT. I'm posting because the word 'depression' covers so many conditions, individuals and circumstances. I hope this post will be of use to someone, now or in the future.
I was oblivious to depression, other than it being something that others suffered and something that I couldn't really understand. That all changed for me one night when I got a knock on the front door and found a rather nervous police officer waiting there. As soon as he mentioned my adult son's name, I knew he was dead. My son had struggled with schizophrenia for years and had been particularly agitated by Abbott's (when this low life was PM) grandstanding about slashing the DSP and other 'benefits'. I thought I'd convinced him there was nothing to worry about but I got that wrong. My son's answer to Abbott's escalating rhetoric was to end it all by walking in front of a train.
I was shattered. My life fragmented into little pieces that just didn't relate to one another. Over time I struggled to put the pieces together but couldn't. It was like there was no 'me' left to hold all the bits together. I slowly began to understand why my son took his life and why others would do the same. I started to think that my only answer was to take my own life. It was when I started to visualise my own death, that I knew I was in trouble. I remember going to the doctor and breaking down completely. I couldn't stop crying and couldn't believe my own tears and how broken I was.
I was put on to medication and given some sleeping tablets. The sleeping tablets were a God send. I was able to sleep properly for the first time in months. I wasn't quite so keen on the other meds after a while. They helped initially but I just didn't feel myself, so I gradually got off them.
I found exercise to be really beneficial, especially when dealing with depression's evil twin, anxiety. In my case, anxiety was often the start with depression following the utter futility of not resolving the underlying issue creating the anxiety. I started off with a few walks and built up to some bid bush walks of 20 k's or so.
In the meantime, my long term de facto relationship collapsed. My son was from a previous marriage and my partner just couldn't deal with my pain and the changes in me.
Years later, I have married a fantastic woman who has two children. I feel life has given me a second chance. I'm one of the lucky ones in that the depression was brought on by circumstances. As I have painstakingly worked through the consequences of that situation, I have been able to overcome depression and create a new life. I still get echos of that feeling and have to work at it, especially not allowing anxiety to get a foothold.
While I believe I'm a much better person for the experience, I would not wish depression on anyone. It's a hell of a lot more than just feeling sad or down. It's incredibly debilitating and requires enormous reserves of strength to fight it.
I do live in hope that I will come across Tony Abbott day though....
Thanks for sharing that SM, all the best with all from here on.
 

Brains Trust66

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Oct 31, 2016
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I've been tossing up whether to post on this issue but you've coaxed me out BT. I'm posting because the word 'depression' covers so many conditions, individuals and circumstances. I hope this post will be of use to someone, now or in the future.
I was oblivious to depression, other than it being something that others suffered and something that I couldn't really understand. That all changed for me one night when I got a knock on the front door and found a rather nervous police officer waiting there. As soon as he mentioned my adult son's name, I knew he was dead. My son had struggled with schizophrenia for years and had been particularly agitated by Abbott's (when this low life was PM) grandstanding about slashing the DSP and other 'benefits'. I thought I'd convinced him there was nothing to worry about but I got that wrong. My son's answer to Abbott's escalating rhetoric was to end it all by walking in front of a train.
I was shattered. My life fragmented into little pieces that just didn't relate to one another. Over time I struggled to put the pieces together but couldn't. It was like there was no 'me' left to hold all the bits together. I slowly began to understand why my son took his life and why others would do the same. I started to think that my only answer was to take my own life. It was when I started to visualise my own death, that I knew I was in trouble. I remember going to the doctor and breaking down completely. I couldn't stop crying and couldn't believe my own tears and how broken I was.
I was put on to medication and given some sleeping tablets. The sleeping tablets were a God send. I was able to sleep properly for the first time in months. I wasn't quite so keen on the other meds after a while. They helped initially but I just didn't feel myself, so I gradually got off them.
I found exercise to be really beneficial, especially when dealing with depression's evil twin, anxiety. In my case, anxiety was often the start with depression following the utter futility of not resolving the underlying issue creating the anxiety. I started off with a few walks and built up to some bid bush walks of 20 k's or so.
In the meantime, my long term de facto relationship collapsed. My son was from a previous marriage and my partner just couldn't deal with my pain and the changes in me.
Years later, I have married a fantastic woman who has two children. I feel life has given me a second chance. I'm one of the lucky ones in that the depression was brought on by circumstances. As I have painstakingly worked through the consequences of that situation, I have been able to overcome depression and create a new life. I still get echos of that feeling and have to work at it, especially not allowing anxiety to get a foothold.
While I believe I'm a much better person for the experience, I would not wish depression on anyone. It's a hell of a lot more than just feeling sad or down. It's incredibly debilitating and requires enormous reserves of strength to fight it.
I do live in hope that I will come across Tony Abbott day though....
A very brave decision to talk about what happened to you . I can’t even imagine what you went through when your son died . Bloody Abbott has no idea how he has ruined lives in this country. Thank you for telling your story . Just from my point of view it’s kinda good to know other people have had troubles too . It’s easy to think that I’m the only one with problems because these issues are not usually talked about . But knowing that there are people here that have gone through depression actually makes me feel happier. Is that wrong ? After all I wouldn’t wish my enemy to go through depression. But knowing that there are people that I can talk to if I need to on here makes me feel just that bit better .

We are all different and we all handle our problems differently. Some people who have never had depression have not been very kind to me with their responses to my issues . I’m not talking about people on this site but people who used to be my friends who stopped calling after I told them about what I was going through. I have lost all my friends in real life except for one . And funny enough , he is on this site too , in fact I think he first told me about it , that’s how I got here if I remember correctly.
I’ve also lost my family as they don’t want to know about me anymore. I haven’t spoken to any of them since I was first locked up . When I came out of the mental ward I expected my family, or at least my parents , to ring to see if I was ok . Not one of them has in over three years . So that’s two parents , three older sisters and an older brother who don’t want to know me anymore. And they call themselves Christians . It really hurt at the time but now I don’t care about them anymore.
As the old saying goes , you don’t pick your family.
People can be mean .


Go Saints
 

Keg on legs

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A very brave decision to talk about what happened to you . I can’t even imagine what you went through when your son died . Bloody Abbott has no idea how he has ruined lives in this country. Thank you for telling your story . Just from my point of view it’s kinda good to know other people have had troubles too . It’s easy to think that I’m the only one with problems because these issues are not usually talked about . But knowing that there are people here that have gone through depression actually makes me feel happier. Is that wrong ? After all I wouldn’t wish my enemy to go through depression. But knowing that there are people that I can talk to if I need to on here makes me feel just that bit better .

We are all different and we all handle our problems differently. Some people who have never had depression have not been very kind to me with their responses to my issues . I’m not talking about people on this site but people who used to be my friends who stopped calling after I told them about what I was going through. I have lost all my friends in real life except for one . And funny enough , he is on this site too , in fact I think he first told me about it , that’s how I got here if I remember correctly.
I’ve also lost my family as they don’t want to know about me anymore. I haven’t spoken to any of them since I was first locked up . When I came out of the mental ward I expected my family, or at least my parents , to ring to see if I was ok . Not one of them has in over three years . So that’s two parents , three older sisters and an older brother who don’t want to know me anymore. And they call themselves Christians . It really hurt at the time but now I don’t care about them anymore.
As the old saying goes , you don’t pick your family.
People can be mean .


Go Saints
Wow BT. That is brutal mate.

I hope as we all are more educated and less fearful of mental illness that what you've experienced never happens to another human being.

I think we are getting better as a community but we have a long way to go.
 

St Muir

Team Captain
Oct 18, 2018
507
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A very brave decision to talk about what happened to you . I can’t even imagine what you went through when your son died . Bloody Abbott has no idea how he has ruined lives in this country. Thank you for telling your story . Just from my point of view it’s kinda good to know other people have had troubles too . It’s easy to think that I’m the only one with problems because these issues are not usually talked about . But knowing that there are people here that have gone through depression actually makes me feel happier. Is that wrong ? After all I wouldn’t wish my enemy to go through depression. But knowing that there are people that I can talk to if I need to on here makes me feel just that bit better .

We are all different and we all handle our problems differently. Some people who have never had depression have not been very kind to me with their responses to my issues . I’m not talking about people on this site but people who used to be my friends who stopped calling after I told them about what I was going through. I have lost all my friends in real life except for one . And funny enough , he is on this site too , in fact I think he first told me about it , that’s how I got here if I remember correctly.
I’ve also lost my family as they don’t want to know about me anymore. I haven’t spoken to any of them since I was first locked up . When I came out of the mental ward I expected my family, or at least my parents , to ring to see if I was ok . Not one of them has in over three years . So that’s two parents , three older sisters and an older brother who don’t want to know me anymore. And they call themselves Christians . It really hurt at the time but now I don’t care about them anymore.
As the old saying goes , you don’t pick your family.
People can be mean .


Go Saints
I had similar experiences BT. My partner of 30 years couldn't deal with it. My best friend of nearly 50 years couldn't deal either and stopped contacting me. A lot of people I thought of as friends or acquaintances simply disappeared. The rest of my family were pretty good but I was always careful not to overload them. Other people that I hadn't been particularly close to really stood up. I've no idea why they did but I remember being so deeply appreciative for their support.
I do know I wasn't always easy to be around and it would have been particularly hard for my partner, so I don't really hold grudges, probably disappointment and a bit of sadness more than anything. I've got no doubt some were simply scared. Maybe they thought it was contagious?
Mate, I have the utmost respect for you. You continue to go through that battle & probably rely on medication balances being right to help you through? With the depression I experienced being predominantly situational, I tend to only have to deal with early signs of anxiety/depression when I'm under stress and I respond accordingly. I'm very happy for you to contact me if you want to. I'm not sure how that PM stuff works but happy to give you my contact details if you like.
 

mightymalaka

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A very brave decision to talk about what happened to you . I can’t even imagine what you went through when your son died . Bloody Abbott has no idea how he has ruined lives in this country. Thank you for telling your story . Just from my point of view it’s kinda good to know other people have had troubles too . It’s easy to think that I’m the only one with problems because these issues are not usually talked about . But knowing that there are people here that have gone through depression actually makes me feel happier. Is that wrong ? After all I wouldn’t wish my enemy to go through depression. But knowing that there are people that I can talk to if I need to on here makes me feel just that bit better .

We are all different and we all handle our problems differently. Some people who have never had depression have not been very kind to me with their responses to my issues . I’m not talking about people on this site but people who used to be my friends who stopped calling after I told them about what I was going through. I have lost all my friends in real life except for one . And funny enough , he is on this site too , in fact I think he first told me about it , that’s how I got here if I remember correctly.
I’ve also lost my family as they don’t want to know about me anymore. I haven’t spoken to any of them since I was first locked up . When I came out of the mental ward I expected my family, or at least my parents , to ring to see if I was ok . Not one of them has in over three years . So that’s two parents , three older sisters and an older brother who don’t want to know me anymore. And they call themselves Christians . It really hurt at the time but now I don’t care about them anymore.
As the old saying goes , you don’t pick your family.
People can be mean .


Go Saints
Yeah man! I echo Kegs thoughts....Thats most def brutal and very sad!
Not casting aspirtions on all religious people at all, but from my experience it is sadly the
Christian Bible belt that are the most judgemental and cruel and ironically unforgiving!

Always wonder what Jesus would be thinking of all that! Your not wrong bud you certainly dont pick your family!
Personally i have not experienced anywhere near the shameful abandonement you have had to suffer through yet
can totally understand why you would have faced many demons because of this...Lets be honest here....Total Betrayal!
If you cant trust your own family to have your back in times of trouble! Then who?
We are all conditioned that way from very young. So for those that suffer such disgraceful unchristian abandonement
i can only imagine must be quite crippling!

Again a testament to your fine self that you are made clearly of great character and you should remember and comfort yourself
knowing just how brave and strong you are! Takes a lot of will and heart to pick yourself up the way you have!
Massive kudos to you BT and St Muir!
You guys are an inspiration to all who still hope for humanity and brotherhood!
 

StCicatriz

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Aug 3, 2016
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A very brave decision to talk about what happened to you . I can’t even imagine what you went through when your son died . Bloody Abbott has no idea how he has ruined lives in this country. Thank you for telling your story . Just from my point of view it’s kinda good to know other people have had troubles too . It’s easy to think that I’m the only one with problems because these issues are not usually talked about . But knowing that there are people here that have gone through depression actually makes me feel happier. Is that wrong ? After all I wouldn’t wish my enemy to go through depression. But knowing that there are people that I can talk to if I need to on here makes me feel just that bit better .

We are all different and we all handle our problems differently. Some people who have never had depression have not been very kind to me with their responses to my issues . I’m not talking about people on this site but people who used to be my friends who stopped calling after I told them about what I was going through. I have lost all my friends in real life except for one . And funny enough , he is on this site too , in fact I think he first told me about it , that’s how I got here if I remember correctly.
I’ve also lost my family as they don’t want to know about me anymore. I haven’t spoken to any of them since I was first locked up . When I came out of the mental ward I expected my family, or at least my parents , to ring to see if I was ok . Not one of them has in over three years . So that’s two parents , three older sisters and an older brother who don’t want to know me anymore. And they call themselves Christians . It really hurt at the time but now I don’t care about them anymore.
As the old saying goes , you don’t pick your family.
People can be mean .


Go Saints
I had similar experiences BT. My partner of 30 years couldn't deal with it. My best friend of nearly 50 years couldn't deal either and stopped contacting me. A lot of people I thought of as friends or acquaintances simply disappeared. The rest of my family were pretty good but I was always careful not to overload them. Other people that I hadn't been particularly close to really stood up. I've no idea why they did but I remember being so deeply appreciative for their support.
I do know I wasn't always easy to be around and it would have been particularly hard for my partner, so I don't really hold grudges, probably disappointment and a bit of sadness more than anything. I've got no doubt some were simply scared. Maybe they thought it was contagious?
Mate, I have the utmost respect for you. You continue to go through that battle & probably rely on medication balances being right to help you through? With the depression I experienced being predominantly situational, I tend to only have to deal with early signs of anxiety/depression when I'm under stress and I respond accordingly. I'm very happy for you to contact me if you want to. I'm not sure how that PM stuff works but happy to give you my contact details if you like.
sadly far too common. with all the good work done on mental health, sadly we still havent taken the next step in terms of understanding how to support people going though it.

its like we now all recognise it and are prepared to ask people if they are ok (R U OK), but sadly people dont want to deal with the next step.

people say you are never alone in depression but you can see why people think they are given how the people around them react to it still. now imagine going to your boss and telling them your struggling. imagine being open with your colleagues about it. if family and friends struggle, imagine the workplace! there's absolutely no way i could do that in my workplace. i just wouldnt feel comfortable and i'd question if i'd get the support, instead i think it'd cause more problems. instead companies set up those employee assistance programs to wash their hands clean of the problem.

sorry to hear your stories guys, hopefully this changes soon
 

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gringo2011

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Nov 12, 2011
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I had similar experiences BT. My partner of 30 years couldn't deal with it. My best friend of nearly 50 years couldn't deal either and stopped contacting me. A lot of people I thought of as friends or acquaintances simply disappeared. The rest of my family were pretty good but I was always careful not to overload them. Other people that I hadn't been particularly close to really stood up. I've no idea why they did but I remember being so deeply appreciative for their support.
I do know I wasn't always easy to be around and it would have been particularly hard for my partner, so I don't really hold grudges, probably disappointment and a bit of sadness more than anything. I've got no doubt some were simply scared. Maybe they thought it was contagious?
Mate, I have the utmost respect for you. You continue to go through that battle & probably rely on medication balances being right to help you through? With the depression I experienced being predominantly situational, I tend to only have to deal with early signs of anxiety/depression when I'm under stress and I respond accordingly. I'm very happy for you to contact me if you want to. I'm not sure how that PM stuff works but happy to give you my contact details if you like.

I don't think all people are arseholes in that situation, some are just overwhelmed about how to deal with someone in distress. I have had a couple of mates come to me suicidal and counselled them through it. I'm not trained and have no real experience but try to be open and listen. A couple of times it felt like a massive burden and you start to wonder if it's attention seeking or real. I always tried to help in case though. I can see the stress of it making people want to avoid it. It's so emotionally stressful that it can really effect your own sense of stability. I feel like I've been lucky in life and really have nothing to complain about so have been pretty shielded from reality so when it lands on my door step I'm really thrown off balance by it.

There should be a website that helps people to help people in psychological distress. I called cops for welfare checks and went around to houses to hang out and chat but if there was some list of what to do I could have checked off, it would have been helpful. I didn't know if I should ring to have a psych assessment or just wait and see etc. Both cases ended well but they were horrific times in the guys I knows lives. One guy was really pi**ed off that I'd sent the cops around because he thought it would be on his permanent record, it was pretty hard to cope with being hated for helping. Anyway, you can kind of see why people get scared of dealing with those situations. Family is different though, that's just s**t behaviour from BT's folks.
 

St Muir

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Oct 18, 2018
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I don't think all people are arseholes in that situation, some are just overwhelmed about how to deal with someone in distress. I have had a couple of mates come to me suicidal and counselled them through it. I'm not trained and have no real experience but try to be open and listen. A couple of times it felt like a massive burden and you start to wonder if it's attention seeking or real. I always tried to help in case though. I can see the stress of it making people want to avoid it. It's so emotionally stressful that it can really effect your own sense of stability. I feel like I've been lucky in life and really have nothing to complain about so have been pretty shielded from reality so when it lands on my door step I'm really thrown off balance by it.

There should be a website that helps people to help people in psychological distress. I called cops for welfare checks and went around to houses to hang out and chat but if there was some list of what to do I could have checked off, it would have been helpful. I didn't know if I should ring to have a psych assessment or just wait and see etc. Both cases ended well but they were horrific times in the guys I knows lives. One guy was really pi**ed off that I'd sent the cops around because he thought it would be on his permanent record, it was pretty hard to cope with being hated for helping. Anyway, you can kind of see why people get scared of dealing with those situations. Family is different though, that's just s**t behaviour from BT's folks.
It sounds to me like your friends were lucky to have you in their lives Gringo and that you cared enough to make some really tough calls.
My son put me through hell sometimes and the only way I could cope and not feel drained was to accept I was doing my best and to drop my judgment on what was a good outcome. It took a lot of discipline to do that and for you to hang in there for your friends is really impressive. I really think you should be proud of that.
 

Sab22

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I also feel like I should share a experience of mine. Well I come from a strict family, dads bit of an alcoholic and mums not so educated, hence a lot of pressure was put on me to perform well, especially with how our education department works, with all the ATAR bs. I had a fair share of bullying, and a real feeling of loneliness throughout primary and secondary school. Never was really the popular kid, not the smartest either. It got to the point where everything hit me at the same time. The bullying increased from abusive to physical violence, pressure from my parents also went up a lot, the expectations put on by people on me was really impacting because I wasn't at my best in terms of academics. Everyone and everything felt useless in my life, I was only 15 and life felt like hell. First came anxiety, slowly I started getting suicidal thoughts, attempted it few times and then I slowly drained into depression for a long time.

How I overcame my problems, was pretty much looking for the smallest postivites inside this whole negative circle. First I realised, this life given to me is a fortunate, and that many kids at my age dont have the luxury such as schooling, education, a house even food. So I started realizing a lot more and here I am.

Mine may not be serious or as impactful what others experience. But what I would like to say is that parents really need to be considerate of the mental health of their kids especially in the current generation. Even a 12 Y/O has a iPhone filled social medias, behind each post they make, someone will talk s**t and that will only grow larger. Its high time, people start taking the negativity behind schooling serious because its life threatening.
 

gringo2011

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I also feel like I should share a experience of mine. Well I come from a strict family, dads bit of an alcoholic and mums not so educated, hence a lot of pressure was put on me to perform well, especially with how our education department works, with all the ATAR bs. I had a fair share of bullying, and a real feeling of loneliness throughout primary and secondary school. Never was really the popular kid, not the smartest either. It got to the point where everything hit me at the same time. The bullying increased from abusive to physical violence, pressure from my parents also went up a lot, the expectations put on by people on me was really impacting because I wasn't at my best in terms of academics. Everyone and everything felt useless in my life, I was only 15 and life felt like hell. First came anxiety, slowly I started getting suicidal thoughts, attempted it few times and then I slowly drained into depression for a long time.

How I overcame my problems, was pretty much looking for the smallest postivites inside this whole negative circle. First I realised, this life given to me is a fortunate, and that many kids at my age dont have the luxury such as schooling, education, a house even food. So I started realizing a lot more and here I am.

Mine may not be serious or as impactful what others experience. But what I would like to say is that parents really need to be considerate of the mental health of their kids especially in the current generation. Even a 12 Y/O has a iPhone filled social medias, behind each post they make, someone will talk s**t and that will only grow larger. Its high time, people start taking the negativity behind schooling serious because its life threatening.

That sounds tough Sab. Yeah, high school is a s**t time for a lot of people. My daughter got cyber bullied at school because she chose to be a vegan. We intercepted one lot of messages where these girls told her to kill herself repeatedly. The private school got her in a room with the girls she was getting bullied by and the school chose to do nothing. We pulled her out pretty quickly after that. We are still sending her to a psychologist 2 years later and it's really shaken her confidence and trust in other people. Some were meant to be her friends.

My dad's cousin had a son who had done really well in year 11 and was expected to do really well on his VCE, towards the end of year 12 he couldn't cope and jumped off a water tower. I didn't know him but he was obviously really struggling with the pressure and no one had even suspected he had any kind of issues. It broke his family with the unit falling apart and his brother becoming really introverted and in turn freaking the parents out who'd started coddling him.

Old people tell you that it's the best time in your life but for a lot it's not.
 

Keg on legs

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That sounds tough Sab. Yeah, high school is a s**t time for a lot of people. My daughter got cyber bullied at school because she chose to be a vegan. We intercepted one lot of messages where these girls told her to kill herself repeatedly. The private school got her in a room with the girls she was getting bullied by and the school chose to do nothing. We pulled her out pretty quickly after that. We are still sending her to a psychologist 2 years later and it's really shaken her confidence and trust in other people. Some were meant to be her friends.

My dad's cousin had a son who had done really well in year 11 and was expected to do really well on his VCE, towards the end of year 12 he couldn't cope and jumped off a water tower. I didn't know him but he was obviously really struggling with the pressure and no one had even suspected he had any kind of issues. It broke his family with the unit falling apart and his brother becoming really introverted and in turn freaking the parents out who'd started coddling him.

Old people tell you that it's the best time in your life but for a lot it's not.
Sadly i hear far too often about schools not doing anywhere near enough to counter bullying. A friend has a daughter who had a similar experience (at the age of 8!) and the school did nothing.

This inaction is costing the lives of our young ones. Nothing should be seen as more important than that.

It may not be politically correct, but I'm not sure how I would handle seeing those kids if they bullied one of my kids.
 

Pakenhamsaint

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Sadly i hear far too often about schools not doing anywhere near enough to counter bullying. A friend has a daughter who had a similar experience (at the age of 8!) and the school did nothing.

This inaction is costing the lives of our young ones. Nothing should be seen as more important than that.

It may not be politically correct, but I'm not sure how I would handle seeing those kids if they bullied one of my kids.
I was bullied for most of my schooling. Im more or less was a railfan and got picked on and was a social outcast as a result.
As a result I had very few friends.
Schools were nothing short of useless of stopping it. Its the same old cycle. Report it it stops for a few weeks. Then it starts again. Report it and it stops. Rinse and repeat. You get to the point where you go why bother and stop reporting it.

Year 6 was a tough one. I had no friends. None.
I stayed down for year 5. My supposed friends bar one decided not to be friends any more after my parents decided to keep be back. Worse they acted like everyone else.
Year 6 was one lonely year. Not a single friend at all. I brought a radio in partway through it to get through lunch breaks.

High school very few friends. I met my best mate orientation day of high school. Funny hes a train driver now and he gets half the crap I used to talk about him about.

Still copped crap out being a railfan from everyone else though.

It only stopped when I decided to belt some fat kid who was much bigger than me.
The teachers who knew me well we rather proud of me. I was worried they were going to punish me for starting it

More than likely my whatever years of schooling have made me the un confident, anxious, shy, scocially awkward person I am. Probably half the reason Ive never had a girlfriend
Although being anxious has been around since prep. My grade prep teacher did say Id give myself stomach ulcers one day from all the worry.
 

Keg on legs

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I was bullied for most of my schooling. Im more or less was a railfan and got picked on and was a social outcast as a result.
As a result I had very few friends.
Schools were nothing short of useless of stopping it. Its the same old cycle. Report it it stops for a few weeks. Then it starts again. Report it and it stops. Rinse and repeat. You get to the point where you go why bother and stop reporting it.

Year 6 was a tough one. I had no friends. None.
I stayed down for year 5. My supposed friends bar one decided not to be friends any more after my parents decided to keep be back. Worse they acted like everyone else.
Year 6 was one lonely year. Not a single friend at all. I brought a radio in partway through it to get through lunch breaks.

High school very few friends. I met my best mate orientation day of high school. Funny hes a train driver now and he gets half the crap I used to talk about him about.

Still copped crap out being a railfan from everyone else though.

It only stopped when I decided to belt some fat kid who was much bigger than me.
The teachers who knew me well we rather proud of me. I was worried they were going to punish me for starting it

More than likely my whatever years of schooling have made me the un confident, anxious, shy, scocially awkward person I am. Probably half the reason Ive never had a girlfriend
Although being anxious has been around since prep. My grade prep teacher did say Id give myself stomach ulcers one day from all the worry.
Wow mate. That's some tough years. As a parent now i hate seeing kids isolated and try to encourage my son to keep an eye out for lonely kids and seek to include them in his games. It breaks my heart to see kids sad.
 

Pakenhamsaint

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Jan 5, 2011
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Wow mate. That's some tough years. As a parent now i hate seeing kids isolated and try to encourage my son to keep an eye out for lonely kids and seek to include them in his games. It breaks my heart to see kids sad.
If theres anything Ive learned in those years is the radio is valuable companion. In my school from year 6 I listened to anything from Ernie Sigley to Hamish and Andy.
 

Yawkey way

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May 8, 2017
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That sounds tough Sab. Yeah, high school is a s**t time for a lot of people. My daughter got cyber bullied at school because she chose to be a vegan. We intercepted one lot of messages where these girls told her to kill herself repeatedly. The private school got her in a room with the girls she was getting bullied by and the school chose to do nothing. We pulled her out pretty quickly after that. We are still sending her to a psychologist 2 years later and it's really shaken her confidence and trust in other people. Some were meant to be her friends.

My dad's cousin had a son who had done really well in year 11 and was expected to do really well on his VCE, towards the end of year 12 he couldn't cope and jumped off a water tower. I didn't know him but he was obviously really struggling with the pressure and no one had even suspected he had any kind of issues. It broke his family with the unit falling apart and his brother becoming really introverted and in turn freaking the parents out who'd started coddling him.

Old people tell you that it's the best time in your life but for a lot it's not.
School can be absolutely brutal, imo girls schools are at the top of the heap for bullying.

The private system doesn’t seem any better than the local high school in fact from my observation it’s worse.
 

VDS66

Brownlow Medallist
Oct 4, 2011
20,843
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AFL Club
St Kilda
Keep up the good work mate!
Thanks to everyone for their kind words and support. You’re a fantastic group of people and your positive contributions do make a difference. Thank you!
I can never begin to image what it's like to lose a child.

Life is challenging enough and coming out the other side is a massive challenge that I have gone though over the years

First step is to acknowledge the problem and seek help.

For as long as I can remember I was always tired and moody. A doctor put the suggestion that I might have depression at which I scoffed at in 2001.

Six years later it came to a head and I finally admitted he was right.

This following some serious financial ruin after 9/11 and ultimately the death on my father and the nasty business if dealing with disgruntled siblings over his will.

That said I have been on the anti depps since and more importantly made drastic changes to my life accordingly.

Best thing I ever did was to lose contact with my family. Best 11 years of my life!

Now all that matters is my wife and kids.

I know that sounds cruel and shocking to some, but it takes real guts to cut off people in life who are dragging you down, even if they are related.

Getting back into an industry I love has also been a big plus.

My son was diagnosed with epilepsy last year so there's another challenge.

So my heart goes out to the silent sufferers among us and your bravery.

As an illness it doesn't completely leave but there are steps you can take.

Hopefully this also explains why I don't tolerate too much drama on here with first world problems.

Peace out and pm if you ever wish to chat.
 

VDS66

Brownlow Medallist
Oct 4, 2011
20,843
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Wow BT. That is brutal mate.

I hope as we all are more educated and less fearful of mental illness that what you've experienced never happens to another human being.

I think we are getting better as a community but we have a long way to go.
Family can be the worst. Stupid comments like "what have you got to be depressed about? You have a nice wife, house, car blah blah blah" all the while oblivious to the fact that they are part of the problem.

My life truly changed when I decided to stop giving a fu**.

Let that sink in people.

Stop giving a fu** about what others say or expect from you.

Only give a fu** wit those that matter.
 
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