Vintage Bay Mofra's Bottom 50 for 2018

[frggr]

Ben Brown would have completed his run up by now...

 

[Sainter3and7]

Sorry fellas, my mistake. I can never think straight (sic) when my mouth is full.

 

[A Cut Above]

Ben Brown would have completed his run up by now...

Daniel Menzel would have laid 10 tackles by now........... in 10 separate games.

 

[DapperJong]

Mofra is waiting for me to email him my supercoach team.

 

[go you pups]

Aiight, first semi-serious list of players Mofra could include. Influenced naturally by who's likely to cause the most supporter outrage.

Adelaide: Tex, Betts
Brisbane: Hodge, Taylor
Carlton: Silvagni, Thomas, Casboult, Lobbe, Jones, Kerridge
Collingwood: Fasolo, Elliott, Wells, Moore, Aish
Freo: B.Hill, Bennell, Every Tall Forward
Geelong: "Holy Trinity" as a single entry, Taylor, Buzza, Smith, Cockatoo, S.Selwood, Parsons, Crameri, Menzel
GC: Lynch & May as a single entry
GWS: Deledio, Griffin, "Dog Act" Cameron
Hawthorn: O'Brien (leave him out and I burn Bigfooty to the ground), Frawley, Schoenmakers, Langford
Melbourne: Lewis, Vince
Norf: Majak, Hartung, Waite
Port: Watts, Motlop, Rockliff
Richmond: Castagna, Cotchin
St.Kilda: Anyone who isn't Jack Steven
Swans: Jack, Hannebery, Rohan, Tippett
West Coast: Gaff
Bulldogs: BOYD, Suckling, Wood, Redpath

Suckling and Repath, lol

Might as well have Birchall and Cyril in here then too

 

[vjknight]

So many references to supercoach.

Now THATS just a game

 

[Grug_]

Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1 Tom Boyd #1

Grug would like to point out this joke is incredibly old now.

 

[Dinsdale]

4 days and no #50?

this is as useful as a really useless thing.

 

[Two Eyes]

Mofra’s getting in nice an early with his expectations trolling.

Settle down Millennials, the top 50 will start soon enough.

 

[cynical]

Geelong: "Holy Trinity" as a single entry, Taylor, Buzza, Smith, Cockatoo, S.Selwood, Parsons, Crameri, Menzel

Good try but a clear fail

Cam Guthrie should be top 10, he is putrid, was highly rated many years ago
Murdoch has been consistently mediocre for 100 games
Parsons for sure, dont know how he got 30 games, career highlight was his hit on Hodge

the rest of those guys are geriatrics or injury prone, Smith is a pea heart but has been injured, Buzza not enough games

 

[JoseMourinho]

I can only imagine how many Fremantle players are going to be in here - I'm estimating atleast 10.

 

[darklake]

Grug would like to point out this joke is incredibly old now.

I like Grug. Grug is good.
Grug is on the side of right.

 

[JoseMourinho]

Freo: B.Hill

Harsh.

 

[Restricted Free Agent]

INB4 Billy Hartung

 

[sthmelb_dimmies]

- Players who have not played a senior game this year are excluded unless your name is Colin Sylvia.

Or Kurt Tippett. Needs to be called out again for rogering Sydney’s Ruck list for 2018.

 

[leobarryustar]

Like Ricky Nixon at an underage sleepover, I think Mofra has gone early on this one. What if Syds pick Rohan for the GF and he gets 2 possies?

 

[Lord_Flashheart]

In a team that is brimming with some unremarkable players currently,a player stands head and shoulders over the rest. If Sean Lemmens does not earn a top 10 spot (I'll understand if anyone outside of 50km of Metricon Stadium has never heard of him given his level of impact in games) I will be amazed. The fact that we gave this preeminent spud another contract speaks volumes of just how much of a s**t sandwich we are at the moment.

 

[Laphroaig]

I can only imagine how many Fremantle players are going to be in here - I'm estimating atleast 10.

Precedent suggests that mere shitness is not enough to get a place in the 50. Especially ordinary vanilla shitness.

 

[leobarryustar]

In a team that is brimming with some unremarkable players currently,a player stands head and shoulders over the rest. If Sean Lemmens does not earn a top 10 spot (I'll understand if anyone outside of 50km of Metricon Stadium has never heard of him given his level of impact in games) I will be amazed. The fact that we gave this preeminent spud another contract speaks volumes of just how much of a s**t sandwich we are at the moment.

Have you gone sour on Lemmens?

 

[GuzzLG]

Curtley Hampton has to be top 5.

 

[DrEvil_]

LOL I don't even know where to start with Port.

 

[schmuttt]

Tom Bugg a lock for top 10 surely

 

[Mofra]

Player #50 - Gary Ablett Jnr


Pictured: How many directions does Gazza run?

Garry Ablett Jnr was a former Geelong father-son pick who went to Gold Coast, became captain, sulked, returned to Geelong and somehow made them weaker.
All pre-season Geelong supporters (unencumbered by employment, culture and in many cases opposable thumbs) spruiked about their 'holy trinity' of midfielders. Unfortunately, AFL is a team sport so if someone racks up big stats but makes the team weaker, that's not actually a good thing.

Gazza's presence in the midfield has somehow made Dangerfield and Selwood less effective as all three fight for the ball - and while Selwood will tackle an opponent if they fall under his eyeline (which is between his face and about 30cm in front of him) and Dangerfield is a star who even kicks the ball to his teammates sometimes, Gazza plays the way Gazza wants which in no way means blocking/helping teammates/tackling very often. He would be an effective forward if sent there, but Gazza views coaches instructions the way most of us view a Chris Scott press conference.

All of this comes boils down to one thing - Gazza wants the easy ball, possession when he doesn't have to make contact with the opposition.
Respected football commentator and multiple premiership winner Mr D Brereton mentioned Ablett should brace for contact and take it, take it, take it all bitch, because the back of Dermott's head is very punchable or something. Seriously.

It's hard to argue with logic like that. Ablett's high profile signing was good for getting dimpled, oversized bums on seats at GMPVXCVFGR Stadium but he is the weakest link in a midfield that statistically has the 17th weakest ruck division in the competition. In effect, he's the tomato of the Geelong fruit salad midfield. Good on his own, technically a fruit, but just ruins the fruit salad when added in.

Gazza, Junior, in full flight you were great to watch. Like Geelong's best and brightest you chose to spend your best years elsewhere and I wish you well on your retirement. Welcome to this year's Bottom 50.

 

[pincrusher]

 

[MAXIMUM GRUNDAGE]

Off to a great start so far Mofra !
Bonus points for ensuring maximum melts by listing Gazza before Saturday morning, which is when the Cats flogs will be heading to Eastern Europe en masse for 6 months.