Mofra's Bottom 50 for 2021

[Smedts_2]

We pick so many spuds, I can’t even tell them apart.

deftly avoided the worlds largest fishing line there…

 

[the avoca drover]

Mofra should be able to fit a few dog’s players in after tonight.

 

[Over The Post]

I presume someone is working on a .gif of a crying Garry Lyon being carried off on a stretcher with the cup dangling from one hand

 

[Madas]

Mofra should be able to fit a few dog’s players in after tonight.

Did Naughton play last night ?

 

[MAXIMUM GRUNDAGE]

Did Naughton play last night ?

Barely touched it playing on an opponent who had a torn hammy.

 

[MC Bad Genius]

Barely touched it playing on an opponent who had a torn hammy.

Who gets the Leon Davis Gary Rohan Medal?

 

[Madas]

Who gets the Leon Davis Gary Rohan Medal?

Weight man choked pretty hard .

 

[deeco]

Can coaches make the list? Asking for Luke Beveridge.....

 

[WillHayward]

Mitch Hannan is a bit s**t isn't he.

 

[TedDougChris]

Mitch Hannan is a bit sh*t isn't he.

Quite a few of us thought that for most of this year, but played some good finals games - sadly not yesterday though....

 

[WillHayward]

Given how hard the Dogs fought to keep him and given the $$$ offered by the Bombers, Josh Dunkley

5

Josh Dunkley

Age

27

Ht

191cm

Wt

87kg

Pos.

Mid

Career

Season

Last 5

D

21.8

5star

K

10.4

4star

HB

11.3

5star

M

4.3

4star

T

5.8

5star

CL

3.2

5star

D

20.7

5star

K

7.0

3star

HB

13.7

5star

M

2.3

2star

T

5.3

5star

CL

2.7

4star

D

14.2

4star

K

7.2

3star

HB

7.0

5star

M

4.8

5star

T

4.0

5star

CL

1.4

4star

is a bit s**t.

 

[craffles]

Easton wood

10

Easton Wood

Age

34

Ht

187cm

Wt

86kg

Pos.

Def

Career

Season

Last 5

D

14.0

4star

K

8.0

3star

HB

6.1

4star

M

4.9

5star

T

1.6

4star

MG

217.0

3star

D

11.2

3star

K

7.0

3star

HB

4.2

3star

M

4.3

4star

T

1.2

2star

MG

154.0

3star

D

12.8

4star

K

6.4

3star

HB

6.4

4star

M

3.0

3star

T

1.8

4star

be a worthy candidate









See what I did there?

 

[TubbsFarquhar]

How much weight is placed on Leon Davis

Leon Davis

Age

42

Ht

177cm

Wt

80kg

Pos.

Fwd

Career

Season

Last 5

D

13.5

3star

K

10.2

4star

HB

3.3

3star

M

3.1

3star

T

2.8

4star

G

1.2

4star

No current season stats available

D

5.0

1star

K

3.6

2star

HB

1.4

2star

M

1.2

2star

T

0.4

3star

G

0.4

3star

medalists for this list?

 

[Stronzo]

Come on Mofra, there’s only so much of reading these dull as dog s**t mainboard posters that I can handle.

 

[Triple Baileys]

Player #46 - Tim English
View attachment 1228341
Pictured: English has a strong affinity with the Bulldogs medical team

Tim English is a Bulldogs ruck forward who hasn't quite developed as quickly as the Bulldogs hoped for.

Timmy was a first round pick in 2016, the greatest season in VFL/AFL history. He was a midfielder who grew 20cm in height in 18 months and started playing ruck as a teenager. He was then drafted on that basis, and after 5 years in the system still plays ruck like a midfielder. Josh Dunkley agrees with me.

This has led to a Bulldog ruck crisis were instead of sending Tim into the ruck they have used a 57 year old Stef Martin until he broke down, then tried a kid so raw (Jordan Sweet) that Ricky Nixon asked for his phone number. In the last few games the Bulldogs have thrown Lewis Young into the ruck - a 22 year old kid who is about 4th in line as a KPD and 6th in line as a KPF. During the finals series* Bontempelli has even taken a few ruck contests because he doesn't get enough recognition and now he finally might get noticed by the umpires and the media.

*Suns fan: sometimes other teams play games in September.

It's not the fact that Timmy gets outbodied by other ruckmen. It's the fact he gets outbodied by second ruckmen, which means the Bulldogs midfielders have to guess where the opposition ruck will hit it to which is a problem because most ruckman are not known for their football nous and sparkling intellect. At the last 'AFL Ruck conference' they needed to print the invitations twice because on the first invitations they spelled 'conference' with a 6.

It got so bad last year that Bevo sometimes sent Josh Dunkley into the ruck, almost causing him to leave the club (fortunately he was courted by Essendon who are hard to deal with - Dodo is basically the Karen of trade week). Essendon fans are adamant they dodged a bullet there which could be true, considering in 2021 they achieved the highest team achievement available to the Essendon Football Club - a losing final.

Back to Timmy. He's actually shown some promise as a 'third tall' simply because he's taller than any KPD he faces and can just stick his arms in the air and hope they chop them, which is a free kick. Whenever he does this and the Bulldogs do win a rare free kick, he can normally kick straight which, judging by efforts of other forwards in the team, might be against team rules. Timmy is also a medical miracle, as most guys have an Adam's apple but Timmy has an Adam's watermelon. If his last name was Daniel and he grew up in South Australia, I bet him mum wouldn't let him play unless he wore a helmet over it.

Fun fact: Tim's nickname is 'chilli' as his cheeks turn bright red when given any attention. Chilli is often used as a garnish in Asian cooking, where it is chopped (like Nadia Bartel's breakfast) and sprinkled over dishes to add heat.

Timmy, congratulations on your finals victory last Sunday making you individually more successful than Essendon's last 17 years. Welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2021.

this will not help us trade the bloke for much. Thanks Mofra.

 

[Tonga Bob]

Player #43 - Reece Conca
View attachment 1235271
Pictured: In an act of kindness, sometimes players let the work experience kid draw the whole tattoo

Reece Conca is a former pick 6 in the 2010 draft who played 104 games for Richmond before moving to Fremantle after the 2018 season as an Unrestricted Free Agent. 2010 was one of the poorer drafts in the modern era, and it was also dominated by Gold Coast marking the first and last time Gold Coast has dominated anything.

Fremantle had tried to lure Reece in 2013, 2016 and 2017 so their pursuit of him was a little bit like The Notebook which Mofra was forced to sit through once. Enduring that movie was not worth the average blowjob that was promised, and here ends the explanation of why Mofra reviews football and not movies.

Playing as small defender, Conca played all 22 games for Fremantle in 2019. Then 14 games in 2020. This year, that number was reduced to 9 (quite ironic for an ex-Tiger). For those of you who are good at spotting trends, you know where this is heading.
His disposal numbers were up by 1 this year compared to last... from full sized quarters again. He average more clangers but less kicks. Yada yada yada - long story short, he was a 29 year old just clinging onto a spot in a Fremantle team that still relies heavily on Fyfe, Mundy and West Coast's addiction issues to remain relevant.

As well as getting less of the ball, he wasn't quite able to to shut down his opponent either. He was sent back to the WAFL in the middle of 2021 with "Work to do" according to assistant coach David Hale, which meant his game was still ok apart from his disposal and his ability to stop an opponent. The problem is if you're 29 years old , don't offer much rebound and you prove yourself a worse lockdown defender than Dan Andrews' press secretary you just know the writing is on the wall.

Fun fact: Reece was award Richmond's best first year player award in 2011 beating out Dean McDonald, Tom Derickx and pass for the award. He was also in Fremantle's leadership group for a year or two, in surprising news for those who have just learned that Fremantle have a leadership group.

Reece, good luck for the next chapter and well done on playing 150 AFL games. Welcome to the Bottom 50 for 2021.

That's either a Dardy McCrafty pic or we've delisted the same bloke twice.

 

[HAPPY BUDDHA]

Gotta laugh at flogs telling a genius to speed up his work on the thread, * me.

 

[hawkman]

Gotta laugh at flogs telling a genius to speed up his work on the thread, fu** me.

Every year this thread is 4-5 pages longer due to flogs saying the same thing

 

[SaintsSeptember]

Come on Mofra, there’s only so much of reading these dull as dog sh*t mainboard posters that I can handle.

Give him time, he needs to crawl back from the abyss.

 

[Starburns_]

Every year this thread is 4-5 pages longer due to flogs saying the same thing

Makes the melts harder to find too. That's the real crime.

 

[weltschmerz]

We're all busy sobering up and working through the stages of grief.

 

[Stronzo]

Every year this thread is 4-5 pages longer due to flogs saying the same thing

There’s a tradition to be upheld here.

C’mon Mofra.

 

[zackah]

Leon winner should be an automatic podium finish.

Congratulations Cody Weightman

3

Cody Weightman

Age

23

Ht

179cm

Wt

75kg

Pos.

Fwd

Career

Season

Last 5

D

6.5

2star

K

4.0

2star

HB

2.5

2star

M

2.0

2star

T

1.0

3star

G

1.0

4star

D

6.5

1star

K

4.0

1star

HB

2.5

2star

M

2.0

2star

T

1.0

2star

G

1.0

4star

D

6.5

2star

K

4.0

2star

HB

2.5

3star

M

2.0

3star

T

1.0

3star

G

1.0

4star

 

[Smedts_2]

Leon winner should be an automatic podium finish.

Congratulations Cody Weightman

That can't be right - this is about sustained poor performance over the season, flash in the pan shitness like Weightman is a dime a dozen.

 

[HAPPY BUDDHA]

Leon winner should be an automatic podium

Snozzil was in the podium, probably couldn’t see him behind Goodwin.

That can't be right - this is about sustained poor performance over the season, flash in the pan shitness like Weightman is a dime a dozen.

Wrong otherwise Rohan would have it since 2014.